Authors: Cindy Thomson
“I think you are right, Sofia. We must listen. Your papà? He is a proud man.”
“
Sì
.”
“But he wants what is best for his wife. Like we all do.”
“I know you are right. Excuse me, Father. I must go see Sister Stefania.”
“Of course. She is entertaining a guest. Someone you would like to see as well.”
Before she got to the kitchen, she was met by the white and brown dog named Luigi. He wagged his tail as he came closer. “Hey, boy. What brings you to the neighborhood?”
Antonio walked up behind him. “I wanted to make sure everything went as planned.”
Sofia looked into his soft face, admiring how kind he was, empathizing with the pain he must feel. “I am so sorry about your papà. The Sergeant said there is a witness, so perhaps this will be over soon and you can pursue your dreams of playing in concert halls.”
“I believe so, Sofia. And I hope you’ll be sitting in the front row.”
Luigi trotted away, leaving the two of them alone in the hall leading to the nun’s kitchen. Antonio put his hands on her arms, helping to steady her pounding heart. When he leaned over and kissed her, she thought she saw stars under her closed eyelids. The coldness left her body and the kiss was over too soon.
He stepped back far enough for her to admire his smile. “I must be going. I was hoping I would run into you here, though. I wanted to say good-bye.”
“Good-bye?”
“Yes. I have run into some good fortune and I will be leaving for Ohio next week. I am going to audition for Oberlin College, the first step in my concert career.”
“Oh.” Her happiness flew away like an uncaged bird. “It was what your father wanted for you, you said.”
“Yes it was.” His eyes sparkled with unshed tears.
“It is what you want?”
He swallowed hard. “A great opportunity for me. I will write to you. I promise.”
She nodded and he moved away, leaving a wispy breeze in his wake. He called from the front door. “Hurry inside. You will want to see the police witness.”
“Here?”
“Of course here.”
She saw his shadow first, a long dark figure. When she turned toward the west-facing window she could not believe her eyes. Joey! She embraced him, not wanting to let go. “Are you all right?”
“I am, sister. You will squeeze the life out of me, though, if you don’t let go.”
She laughed. “I was afraid I would never see you again. Where have you been?”
“In my attic,” Sister Stefania said, placing a coffeepot on the stove. “Up there with the phonograph, for safekeeping. The gardener’s wife let me keep it.”
“Are you safe now, Joey?”
“He will be,” the Sister answered. “As soon as the trial is over.”
“You are the witness?”
“I am.”
“And so brave,” their aunt added, placing a tray of cannoli on the table.
They talked a long while and Sofia almost forgot the pain of Antonio leaving so soon after their kiss.
“Go see Mamma for me,” Joey said. “And tell Papà not to worry.”
“I will.” She hurried toward the Falcone apartment, only a few yards away. It seemed life was like a continually turning wheel, throwing off some things and gathering others. She lost Mamma, she gained Hawkins House. She got Joey back, she lost Antonio. Maybe not forever. She hoped not.
Carla met her at the door wearing Mamma’s apron. “Are you settled in all right?” Sofia whispered.
“
Sì
. Your papà and your brothers and sister have been very kind to us.” Carla reached behind her for her daughter and gave Luisa a big squeeze. “I am proud of her. She tried to fix what her papà did.”
“What do you mean?”
“During her visits to the Free Library, Luisa overheard that
Signor
Baggio’s father had hidden the money that was supposed to help the men of our village break free of the p
adrone
. She sent Antonio anonymous notes, hoping he would come help.”
“Notes?”
“
Sì
, like a message boy,” Luisa admitted.
While Sofia wished the girl had confided in her instead, she agreed that it was a brave thing to do. Who knew if her abusive father would have come after her as well as her mother if he’d known? Benevento women always find a way around obstacles.
“And Mamma?”
Carla stared at the floor as she motioned Sofia inside. She kept her voice low. “Your sister spoke to her. At first your mother did very well, almost seemed her old self again. And then Gabriella talked about that day, asked her questions, and Angelina withdrew again. Your sister had to return to the children. Luisa and I have been trying to reach her, but Angelina refuses to talk to us. Your father is not home from work yet. He will be angry with your sister.”
Sofia had not realized Gabriella agreed that Mamma needed to talk about it. “He should not be angry. My sister was right. Mamma should remember, tell us what happened.”
“There was a cost, Sofia. Your mamma has taken a bad turn.
Sofia whispered a prayer as she walked toward Mamma’s room. The space was heavy with anticipation.
Dear God, I need your words to be mine right now. Help us all.
“Mamma?”
“Sofia?”
“
Sì
, Mamma. I am here.” Her mother sat on a stool next to a window encased with a newly installed iron lattice. The window was closed. There were no burning candles and Carla had filled the room with the scent of her tinctures.
“I chose you, Sofia. I chose you.” Tears streamed down Mamma’s face. “Gabriella asked me, so I told her. And now I tell you. I chose you.” She began whimpering, repeating Serena’s name over and over.
Sofia clasped her mother’s hand. “An accident, Mamma. You remember?”
Her mother nodded and sniffed. “I was home alone with my twins, you and her. Serena headed for the door toward the sound of the goats, like always. But this time someone had left the door open. I was cooking. I left the stove and headed for the door. You stuck out your hand because you knew I was making
orecchiette
. ‘Little ears, little ears,’ you called because you thought the name of the pasta was so funny. You reached for the pot. Your sister ran for the door. Both in danger. What could I do? I had to choose.”
“Oh, Mamma. It is not your fault.”
“No, it happened. I chose. And I did not tell you because…I feared you would hate me for not saving your sister, and for not being careful enough with the two of you. I thought we were helping by telling you your memories were nothing but fantasy. I was wrong, I know now. I just did not want you to stop loving me.” She wept softly into Sofia’s shoulder.
“Oh, Mamma, I would never feel that way. I love you no matter what.”
“You forgive me?”
“If I had anything to forgive you for, I would without hesitation. I could never blame you, especially knowing the truth. Thank you for telling me.”
By the time Papà came home the rooms were quiet. Sofia’s brothers were off at work and Gabriella was in the neighbor’s kitchen feeding their children.
“Why are you here so early?” Papà asked her, glancing between Sofia and Angelina.
“The woman who owns the library had a baby. Two babies. Twins. She was visiting me at the factory when she realized the babies were coming. They let me go home to help her.”
Papà threw his hands upward, as though this was a ridiculous thing.
Sofia silently reminded herself to explain the offer for work to Carla and Luisa as soon as things calmed down in the Falcone household.
“I saw Joey today.”
Mamma’s face brightened and Papà raised his brows. Sofia explained how her brother was going to help make the neighborhood safer by testifying in the murder case of Ernesto Baggio. “I cannot tell you where he is. It is safest for you if I do not, for now. But do not worry. He is well.”
Mamma breathed deeply. It seemed the weight of a freight train had been removed from her shoulders.
“I have news, too,” Papà announced, making them all sit around the room and pay attention. Sofia already knew about the returned money, of course, but she did not say so. Papà was proud that Mamma would be getting the treatment she needed, and just in time for Carla to take on a new position.
“What about your young man?” Mamma said suddenly, surprising everyone.
“My young man?”
“Gabriella told me you have a young man, Sofia. I only hope he is as good as your father.”
Mamma would get better. She was talking normally again. The time to tell about Antonio’s family’s origin in Italy would come later. If there was a future for them at all. “He is going away to college in the west.”
Papà nodded and the topic was closed.
Chapter 38
One week after receiving financial endorsement from Paderewski, Antonio sat on a bench in Grand Central Station to wait for a train departing westward. He told himself he wanted to go. He needed to. He should be grateful for the opportunity. Detective McNulty assured him the trial would not happen for months. He had plenty of time to audition and return home. The murder trial should be over by the next term. Nicco was getting better and, with Luigi to keep him in line, he would be fine. Everything was falling into place.
Or so it seemed. His heart told him otherwise.
He gazed up at a round white globe light under which sat a mother, father, and baby. A family. In Ohio, he had no one to greet him. Not even his dog. It was normal to be a little homesick. He glanced up to see someone marching toward him. Sydney, otherwise known as O. Henry. He sat down on the bench next to Antonio.
“I heard you turned down Paderewski.”
“You came out here to say that?”
“I might have.”
“How did you know I was here?”
“Stopped by your place and your uncle told me.”
“I don’t know if I’m making the right decision. He told me I could use the money he sent for Oberlin.”
“So you are on your way to Ohio?”
Antonio laughed, knowing the man held distain for the place for some reason. “Don’t say it with such displeasure. Oberlin is the best music college I could find, one that teaches all academics.”
“Fine, fine. And why is that important again?”
“My father—”
“No, what about you, Antonio? Don’t pin this decision on your deceased father.”
Was he making excuses? Running toward a dream that he didn’t even want?
“Nicco, your uncle? He said you are leaving a girl behind.”
The woman with the baby lifted her nose at them and the family hurried away.
“My uncle talks too much.”
The writer crossed his legs at the knee. “I had a wife once. I ran away, too, but it was necessary, circumstances being what they were. I didn’t want to leave her. I’m sure you feel the same.”
“Perhaps. I’m not sure.”
“Listen, kid. Take it from me. There are always choices. If you don’t take the Oberlin route, Paderewski will still be around. For a time, anyway. Going on one European tour with him would teach you as much as the college, I would guess. And if I’m wrong, you still have the girl.”
“What happened to your wife, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“Fair enough. I brought it up, didn’t I?” He set both feet firmly on the floor and rubbed his hands on his knees. “She died. I returned just in time but the years we lost being together, well, I will regret them forever. There were consequences to my returning, but to be with her in the end was well worth it. Have you purchased your ticket yet?”
He hadn’t.
***
Sofia decided to stay at Hawkins House. Mamma was being looked after. Gabriella and Luisa had become good friends. Joey would be home soon and Fredo and Frankie had secured him a job working on the subway construction. Carla had moved into with the Adamses, and Sofia enjoyed seeing her in the evenings at Hawkins House. Life was settling in comfortably. She was even beginning to learn to read some of the books in Annie’s great library. She should be happy. But she wasn’t.One evening she decided to pay Stefania another visit. She found her listening to her phonograph and tapping her fingers together as she sat in the kitchen waiting for visitors. “Father Lucci gave you the most appropriate job,” Sofia told her.
“Oh?”
“There is no one more welcoming, more hospitable than you.”
Stefania kissed her cheek. “Have you listened to the Master’s voice, dear?”
“What do you mean?”
“I know you can hear him calling, if you will just listen.”
“You mean God calling to me?”
“I do mean that.” A shout from the door sent the woman away to give bread to a beggar.
Sofia thought about what she’d said. She had petitioned Our Lord. She knew he heard and answered. But was she missing something? She quickly said good-bye and headed home to Hawkins House.
Before she reached the front stoop, she saw the dog. Someone was instructing him. Antonio had left for Ohio. Perhaps this was a different dog. As she came closer, she noticed the animal waiting at attention, just the way Luigi always did. She called out. The dog looked at her. It was Luigi. “Hey, Lu. Come here!”
The dog wagged his tail and whimpered, but he did not come.
The man returned, motioned to the dog, and Luigi immediately scrambled up the steps. The man turned toward her. Antonio!
“I was looking for you.” He came toward her, Luigi at his heels. The dog would only listen to his master’s voice, not hers, even though he had obviously wanted to come to her. If only Sofia’s faith in God was that loyal, that strong. She would work at it.
They embraced.
“I am not going to Ohio. I realized I have opportunities for my career right here. I reminded myself that the concert halls in Europe would always be there, when I’m ready, but right now I want to be in New York, because you are here.”
“You changed your tune.”
“I what?”
“An old English poem in Annie’s library about Robin Hood. It speaks about changing your tune. I asked Annie about it. It means to change your mind, to alter the direction of your life.”
“Well, then that’s what I am doing. I might even take up the accordion.”
“Truly?”
“A story for later.”
“Me as well. I am listening to God and changing my tune.”
His lips met hers, firm and with passion. Her legs felt feeble. Her head light. Though the day was dreary and damp, she barely noticed. What was inside her heart was far more soothing. She vowed never again to stop listening.
They linked arms and headed to the house where they could already hear babies crying. Her spirit warmed in a way that assured her she would never be cold again.