Solstice at Stonewylde (18 page)

‘No, I’m sorry … I didn’t think. It’s alright, I can manage.’

‘Good. Because I’m a generous man where it’s deserved, but I won’t be taken for a fool. When I became magus I banished all the spongers and leeches and I don’t intend to start allowing them back in.’

Sylvie felt embarrassed. She’d expected a lecture about school work, but not this. She really wished her mother hadn’t said anything about her needing new clothes, even though the situation was becoming a little desperate.

‘However, there’s one thing you can do for me that’s worth more than every hour of labour given on the entire estate. I think you know what I’m talking about.’

She swallowed hard and nodded.

‘Look at me, Sylvie, when I’m talking to you. You know what I need from you, what you alone can give me. Have you thought about it since our last talk, when I was so angry with you for interfering at Samhain?’

She nodded again, remembering Yul’s words about not raising Magus’ suspicions and going along with what he wanted.

‘So will you freely give me the moon magic? Or will you persist in fighting me, threatening to leave, and starving yourself so you become weak and too ill to moondance properly and give me what I want?’

‘I’ll give it freely,’ she whispered. ‘I’m sorry I refused. I didn’t realise how selfish I was being.’

He smiled and it was like the sun irradiating the land after a thunderstorm.

Life at the Hall became unbearable for Sylvie. The teachers continued to exert pressure on her in every lesson and she was loaded with extra work in all subjects. None of them had a good word
for her despite the effort she was putting in, and they all made her feel stupid and worthless if she asked for clarification or assistance. The daily visits to Hazel continued and her weight rose slowly, now aided by Magus himself. He insisted that she sit by his side at every meal and monitored her eating carefully. He controlled everything she ate, always insisting she take more than she wanted or could comfortably manage. She felt like a turkey being fattened up for Christmas.

Worse, the fuss he made of her didn’t go unnoticed. The other girls were beside themselves with jealousy at this attention and took delight in making nasty remarks. They also picked up on the fact that Magus wasn’t being solicitous, but was actually coming down hard on Sylvie. With the other adults at the Hall being so disapproving and censorious of her too, the youngsters took the opportunity to victimise Sylvie with impunity. Holly was the ringleader and she had plenty of ammunition. Sylvie’s unpopularity with the teachers was seized on, and Holly teased her constantly about her failure to keep up with the rest of the class. She picked on Sylvie’s eating and weight gain, and her lack of winter clothes was a gift to her tormentors. Sylvie felt frumpy and plain in the out-grown summer things she still wore, topped with increasingly threadbare jumpers to keep warm. Holly swanked around in smart new outfits and took pleasure in humiliating her rival at every turn.

One morning Sylvie sat alone in the Dining Hall surrounded by breakfast debris. She’d been forced to eat a hearty cooked meal and, coming so soon after a huge dinner the night before, she now felt uncomfortably over-full. Magus had just left. He’d spent nearly an hour plying her with food, watching her swallow every mouthful. He’d stayed as everyone else gradually left the room just to make sure that she ate it all, with the added effect of making her late for school. Holly had given her a particularly venomous stare as she left to prepare for the first lesson of the day. Magus had finally gone and Sylvie was almost in tears, trying to decide whether to make a dash for the bathroom or wait a few more minutes and hope her stomach settled. She wasn’t sure
whether or not she’d make it there before she was sick.

‘You’re still here?’ cried Holly, poking her head round one of the double doors. ‘Not still eating, are you? Greedy pig – you’re going to get so fat!’

She came into the great Dining Hall and started to make her way through the room to where Sylvie sat at the top table, pale and nauseous, holding a napkin to her lips.

‘Brambling has sent me to fetch you as he’s waiting to start the French lesson.’

‘I don’t feel very well,’ said Sylvie weakly. ‘Tell him to start without me and I’ll come as soon as I can.’

‘You can’t skip lessons just because you stuffed yourself at breakfast!’ said Holly, now standing in front of the table. ‘You’re thick enough as it is and Brambling’s not at all impressed. He’s furious you’re not in there after all the fuss that’s been made about your attendance. You should hear him – everyone’s killing themselves laughing at his impersonation of you trying to buy a rail ticket in French.’

A young servant came in quietly through the door leading to the kitchens, and started clearing away some of the serving dishes from the long sideboard. Holly threw the girl a look, but otherwise ignored her.

‘I’m so pleased it entertains you all,’ muttered Sylvie. ‘Tell Brambling I’ll be along soon.’

Sylvie wished Holly would go; the nausea hit her in waves and the waistband of her old skirt dug in tightly. Holly glared at her disdainfully.

‘Seen lover boy lately?’

Sylvie shook her head, not daring to open her mouth to speak.

‘Well I have! I saw him yesterday when I was out riding and he was looking as gorgeous as ever, up at that stone on the top of the hill near the ridgeway. I told him about our little chat and he wasn’t at all pleased that you know about us. He’d wanted us to keep it a secret so he could have us both, a bit like you keeping him secret from Magus. I suppose now Magus is back, you’ll have to stay away from Yul, won’t you? So I can have him all to myself,
just like the good old days before you came! Yul and I always did have an understanding. Did you know we’re going to be partners at our Rite of Adulthood?’

‘Go away, Holly!’ whispered Sylvie, feeling more nauseous than ever.

The Village girl came back in to get more dishes and glanced over at the two Hallfolk girls who shouldn’t still be here.

‘Get out!’ yelled Holly. ‘We’re having a private conversation!’

The girl scurried away and shut the door behind her.

‘Stupid half-wit peasant! Yeah, now Magus is back, you’ll have to give up your bit of rough, won’t you? And haven’t you just got Magus wrapped around your little finger again? Goddess, it makes me want to puke watching him with you. Fussing over you, spoiling you, and he was practically feeding you breakfast just now. Does he like you being his little girl? That’s sick!’

Unable to hold it any longer, Sylvie threw up over the littered table. Holly leapt back with a shriek of disgust.

‘You revolting bitch! You did that on purpose!’

Sylvie sat ashen-faced and perfectly still, staring at the awful table-cloth in horror. She covered her mouth with the linen napkin and felt so humiliated. Not only had she disgraced herself before the girl who hated her most, she must try to clean up this dreadful mess too. She couldn’t possibly leave it for that poor Village girl, and she’d be even later for French now. Sylvie felt tears well in her eyes yet again and wished that she were anywhere but here.

Holly had already retreated for the doors but stopped there, hand on the brass doorknob. She turned and looked speculatively at Sylvie, sitting motionless and tearful at the table waiting for the tide of nausea to recede.

‘Or maybe you didn’t throw up on purpose? Maybe it’s morning sickness! Now there’s a thought – Mother and daughter pregnant at the same time! We know Magus is the father of your mother’s baby, but I wonder if he’s the father of yours too?’

A few nights later, Sylvie sat in bed trying to finish her geography revision for a test the next morning. The words swam before her eyes as it was growing late and she’d been looking at text practically since she woke up that morning. Outside, the wind was rising and dark clouds scudded rapidly across the large silver moon. She didn’t want to see it. It was a constant reminder of the curse of her moongaziness, and although she hated drawing the curtains maybe she should. The wind rattled the diamond window panes and Sylvie shivered slightly, feeling warm and snug in her bed, but not free of the fear that haunted her. Every night the moon waxed fuller and she still had no idea what would happen at the next Moon Fullness.

She hadn’t seen Yul since their argument under the yew tree the night after the Dark Moon. It was probably just as well, it had given her time to calm down and reflect on their fight. Sylvie realised they’d both been overwrought and was increasingly prepared to forget the whole thing. The business with Holly wasn’t so easy to dismiss, however. She was desperate to know what had really happened between the two of them, but with Magus watching her so closely there’d been no chance to escape the Hall and find Yul.

Magus was still being strict and disapproving with her. He made her sit with him at every meal-time, he looked in on every lesson and checked up on her in the library in all her free periods. He took her to the formal garden if she said she needed fresh air and her lovely walks down to the Village to see Yul had become a thing of the past. Magus even visited at night to make sure she’d gone to bed and wasn’t staying up late, coming into her bedroom to say goodnight and turn out her light like a stern father. She hated every second of it and felt suffocated by his constant attention. But she endured it because Yul had said she must keep Magus happy, although after the row with him she wasn’t quite so sure that Yul knew best. She endured it because she had no choice.

She put the dull textbook aside and opened the drawer next to
her bed, pulling out her battered copy of
Wuthering Heights
. It fell open immediately to reveal its secret – Professor Siskin’s photo of Yul. He’d printed it on heavy photographic paper and, despite Sylvie’s constant handling, the photo was still clear and smooth.

She gazed at Yul’s beautiful face, golden in the sunlight and smeared with green lichen and brown earth, his glossy curls long and full of twigs and leaves. His slanted, long-lashed grey eyes gazed out sleepily, a half-smile playing on his lips, and bright green foliage formed a glowing halo of leaves. Whenever Sylvie felt unhappy – unable to cope with Magus’ attention, the nastiness of Holly and the girls, her mother’s indifference, the criticism of her teachers and the doctor, or the loneliness of not seeing Yul for so long – she’d look at the photo and feel comforted by the sight of her own Green Man, so beautiful and magical. She missed him so much, despite Holly’s spiteful attempts to ruin things between them.

Suddenly there was a pattering at her window too harsh for rain. Sylvie rose from her warm bed and looked out into the darkness, just making out a figure with pale upturned face standing on the grass below. It waved and disappeared, and a minute later there was a knock at the wooden door to the staircase in the corner of her room.

‘Yul!’

She was overjoyed to see him standing in the arched doorway, his head almost brushing the top of it. The wind had whipped his face into a rosy glow and his hair into wild ringlets. His eyes sparkled brightly and he stood there slightly out of breath, obviously having run all the way from the Village. He wore an old leather jacket against the November cold, and dark trousers and boots. He was tall, lean and devastatingly good looking, and Sylvie had a sudden vision of him in the Outside World, maybe at college or university, surrounded by adoring girls all unable to keep their hands off him. She closed her eyes to block out the image and opened them to find him standing directly in front of her.

‘Are you alright, Sylvie?’ he asked, holding her at arm’s length and looking into her eyes.

‘I’m fine, just fatter than I was. I’ve been trying to come and find you but it’s impossible to get away with Magus watching me like a hawk. How are you feeling now? You look really well.’

‘I’m almost back to normal thanks. Sylvie, I need to apologise. I’m really sorry about what happened at the Dark Moon. I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.’

‘It’s okay. It was nothing really but I don’t like being bossed about and you sounded so like Magus. It’s bad enough with him trying to dominate me.’

‘I know. I was wrong and it won’t happen again.’

She laughed.

‘Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Yul! I’m sure you’ll do it again loads of times. So long as you know I won’t take it and you’ll never get away with it.’

He grinned at her and relaxed a little.

‘I’ve brought you a present to say sorry,’ he said, reaching inside his heavy leather jacket and producing an exquisite carving of a leaping hare. Sylvie gasped and gently took the tiny piece of polished golden wood from his outstretched hand.

‘It’s a moondancing hare. I made it from a little piece of our tree, the yew on the Village Green.’

She flung her arms around him in a fierce hug, kissing his cold cheeks and smelling the November night in his hair.

‘You made it yourself? You’re so clever! It’s so tiny and perfect – thank you, Yul!’ she exclaimed. ‘It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, apart from you.’

He laughed but then his face grew serious.

‘There’s something else we must talk about.’

‘Come and sit down,’ she said, but looking around realised the only place was the bed as her chair was covered with a pile of school books. She wore her long nightdress made of fine white Stonewylde linen, given to her by Cherry when she first arrived, and although it covered everything except her hands, feet and face, she suddenly felt shy. Yul seemed not to notice and sat on
the bed, frowning and preoccupied. She sat down next to him.