Son of Eden, a Paranormal Romance (16 page)

Emily gave him some time. She could tell he was concerned for the waitress.

After a few more moments she could no longer suppress her curiosity. “Why would you know those things? What purpose does it serve you?”

“It’s another one of our abilities. We not only protect but we can take away illness and disease. Of course, only when prompted.” Alexander folded his hands together, placing his elbows on the table so he could lean in toward Emily. “When you hear of those miraculous healings after the doctors have done everything they can and nothing has worked, that’s usually us.”

“So Guardians not only protect but they can undo the effect of a disease…” Emily let her head drop down to stare at Alexander’s powerful hands. “Like cancer,” she finished her voice barely audible.

“Yes, like cancer.” Alexander knew exactly where Emily’s thoughts were going. He braced himself for what he knew was to come next.

It was now Emily’s turn to sit in silence, to gather her thoughts and feelings.

“Why was my mother made to suffer through her cancer? Was she not worthy of a Guardian?” Emily kept her head down as she tried to fight back the tears.

“Emily, you know that is not true, of course she had a Guardian. But as I have said before, we are not the ones to make the decisions over who lives and who dies, over who suffers and who does not. We can only follow the promptings given us.” Alexander took a deep breath. He had to tell her about her mother.

Emily looked up; the tears flowed freely from her eyes. “I don’t understand how her Guardian could just sit there and see all the pain she went through and not do anything. She suffered too much, it wasn’t fair!” she whispered harshly. “Prompting or not, if I had the power to take that from her, I would have, anyone with feelings would have.”

“Emily…” Alexander closed his eyes briefly as if to draw strength to say what he wanted. “I was your mother’s Guardian.”

Emily’s eyes widened with fear and disbelief; her tears suddenly stopped falling.

“What did you say?” she finally breathed out.

“I was your mother’s Guardian. I was with her from the time of her birth until the day she died. I loved your mother very much. It was hard to watch her go through what she did. To watch all of you suffer. After her death I was reassigned as your Guardian.” Alexander was relieved to have his secret out, but his longing to comfort Emily shadowed his relief. He knew he could not right now. She was upset and needed to feel angry and hurt. It was natural. He had seen it countless times before.

The waitress appeared, setting the food down in front of them. Before she left, Emily reached out and gently touched her arm.

Without taking her eyes off Alexander she softly muttered, “I am actually going to need this to go. And I’m so sorry you’re sick, I hope things get better for you.” She finally turned her eyes to the waitress, retracting her hand from the woman’s arm.

The waitress looked surprised but did not say a word. Instead, she simply continued about her business like nothing was said, and went to fetch a box.

“Emily, are you okay? I understand if you are angry with me,” Alexander said gently.

“I’m not angry. I’m not sure what I am. I’m confused, I’m hurt, I…” She didn’t finish her sentence. Instead, she reached into her purse.

The waitress came back and quickly dropped the ‘to go’ box and left. She did not spare a glance at either one of them on her way back to the kitchen.

Emily retrieved a fifty-dollar bill from her wallet and placed it under the saltshaker. Without a word she put her sandwich in her box, stood, and turned for the door. She heard Alexander get up and then follow her outside.

When they reached the car she extended her hand out toward him.

“I need my keys please,” she said just above a whisper.

“Whatever you need,” Alexander replied, as he reached into his pants and retrieved the keys.

“I’m not angry with you, but I still can’t be around you right now. I have to think, alone. I’m sure you don’t understand why, I’m sorry.” Emily was beginning to cry again, the tears felt hot against her chilled cheeks.

“Take however much time you want. I’ll be here when you need me,” he vowed sweetly as he placed the keys in her hand.

“I know,” Emily murmured as she got into the car.

She put the BMW in reverse and could see that Alexander was still in the spot where she had left him. When she pulled out onto the street she glanced once more in his direction, but he was gone.

 
Chapter 8

That’s All

 

The sound of the rain outside had slowed to a lull drumming. When Emily reached her family’s cabin on the lake, the freezing rain had begun to fall. She had wondered why it hadn’t turned to snow; it certainly felt cold enough.

The house was damp and chilly when Emily arrived. She turned the heater on but it was taking a long time to warm the place. In an effort to get more comfortable, Emily had started a fire in the giant stone fireplace that graced the center of the living room. After her second attempt had produced a meager flame, she had slumped down on the piano bench just a few feet from the large hearth and gazed out the giant windows that covered the entire exterior wall. She watched the rain beat down on the deck and dock that stretched from their property all the way to the lake. Rain made the water look as though it was boiling, thumping every square inch of the surface.

She sat for what seemed like hours, staring at the small flame as it flickered and fought against the draft that trickled down the chimney. She felt a lot like that little flame, as though she too was struggling to exist. The cold that surrounded her only made her think of Alexander with his warm arms, and how quickly his embrace could heat her body. She longed for his touch, his arms to be wrapped around her.

As soon as she had given in to thinking about Alexander, the tears began to flow freely and had not stopped for the past two hours.

Emily found her emotions jumping from complete sorrow to fits of rage. At one point she wanted to throw things and break them. Death and suffering were always a difficult concept for Emily to grasp. When her mother was diagnosed and died so soon afterward, she was left more confused than ever and with more grief than she felt was humanly possible to bear.

Being raised to believe in God and Heaven and an eternal reward for those who did good in this life had sustained Emily in the first months after her mother was diagnosed. Her mother was an exceptional woman, a good person. Emily felt like there was no way God would let her mother die because it wasn’t her time. She was needed by her family, by Emily. After four grueling months of witnessing the effects of surgeries and chemotherapy, Emily’s beliefs shifted. She didn’t understand how a loving God could allow for such suffering. She wondered why He would punish her mother and her family with this awful tragedy.

The nights Emily spent in the hospital holding her mother’s frail hand, stroking it and praying changed her. She determined that either no one was listening to her prayers, or that they simply didn’t care. A few months after her mother’s death Emily broke down, and in a hurtful rage, began shouting and cursing God or whoever it was that had inflicted this disease upon her mother. Her father had allowed her to carry on until she was exhausted, and then let her collapse in his arms.

As he held her, he shared his thoughts and feelings about everything for the first time since the funeral. Emily’s dad had told her that he didn’t believe that God had done this to punish them. He knew that wasn’t His nature. He told Emily that after becoming a father he had gained a new perspective on how he thought things worked.

“I think we are all here on this earth to do certain things, fulfill certain missions in this life. We are each unique and have an important role. Some of us are here for a short while because what we need to accomplish doesn’t involve much time, while others of us have a purpose that requires us to remain on earth longer.” Emily could tell he truly believed what he was saying. Her father continued his monologue, determined to express the feelings of his heart.

“I also don’t believe that all the bad things that happen in this life are punishments. If all we ever knew were happiness and bliss, what would there be for us to accomplish here? Whose life could we change for the better? What good would need to be brought about by our hands? No… trials and sickness are given to us to help us learn and grow and become stronger by overcoming it all. As your father, I have witnessed you do a lot in your life, and there have been times I have had to stand back and watch you toil and trouble over some things because I knew it was in your best interest to learn for yourself from your own experiences.

“When you were learning how to swim Emily, it was the first thing that ever seemed truly hard for you to accomplish. You were like a rock and you sank as soon as I let go. But I knew that with us having a home by the lake, if you didn’t learn how to swim, you could have an accident and drown.”

At the time, Emily had given a little snicker as her mind was filled with the memories of learning to swim. It was frightening for her, and she still did not enjoy playing in the water. She was not a strong swimmer.

“If I had rescued you every time your head went below water, you would have never learned how to swim. It was hard for me to see you gag and choke and struggle, but eventually you learned to stay afloat, and you were stronger because of it. I knew you were tough enough to go through the pains of learning because I knew eventually you would swim. You see, I think it is the same with this life. Sometimes we are allowed to sink a bit below water and choke and struggle along the way because in the end we are stronger and in the end it teaches us how to tread through the hard times, to stay afloat.

“You and I were given this trial because we are strong enough to handle it. God knows that we’re not going to sink like a rock because of all this. He knows we’ll eventually come out with our heads above water, our muscles stronger because of all the paddling and stroking it takes to make it to the shore.” Her father’s eyes had remained dry until he expressed his last thought. Only then did he allow the tears to spill over his lids and streak down his face.

That talk with Emily was crucial to her emotional recovery. She now tried to replay it in her mind as she struggled to make sense of everything once again. The new information she obtained back at the cafe caused Emily to experience the same feelings she had before, the same questions in her mind. Emily wondered why Alexander hadn’t received the prompting to heal her mother’s sickness. If Alexander loved her so much, why had he let it happen? Why had he not just acted on his own?

The questions had caused her to sob uncontrollably, but when she had finally expelled all of her anger and hurt she began to think clearly again. The answers to all of Emily’s questions finally resonated within. The counsel her father gave her two years before held the explanation she sought.

She had hated every minute of swim lessons and thought at the time her father was punishing her, yet she knew afterward that wasn’t true. He taught her how to swim because he loved her and he knew she could handle it. It was something in life she needed.

She now knew that it was the same with Alexander.

Just because he had allowed something to happen to her that wasn’t truly in his power to change didn’t mean he didn’t love her. It actually meant the opposite. He loved her enough to let her learn, to not interfere with an experience that, for some reason or another, she needed in this life.

Now, as Emily sat at the piano bench she felt foolish. She felt silly over how she initially reacted and wondered how she could make things right. She thought back to how compassionate Alexander was with her. He had never lost his temper or said anything to hurt her feelings. She was upset with herself for not being the same way with him, for not showing him the same respect.

Emily wasn’t sure how she was supposed to let Alexander know she was ready to talk to him when she was still too embarrassed to speak. Reaching out she struck a key on the grand piano before her. She turned her body to fully face the piano and placed her hands in the correct position.

Emily began to play a soft melody on the piano. It was ‘Ode to Joy,’ the song she played for Alexander on their first date. When she was finished she looked around to see if Alexander was there.

“What am I expecting? He may not even be here, and even if he is, he’s probably used to hearing me play that song whenever I’m sad. How is he supposed to know my intentions? Alexander, if only you could hear my thoughts. I want you here again, I’m sorry.”

Letting her head drop she sat for a minute trying to work up the courage to call for him. Then another song came to her mind, a song that she was not that familiar with but had heard enough to recall a few notes of a piano solo in the beginning.

It was the song that she and Alexander had danced to the night of the charity concert. She tried drumming it out and stumbled over a few notes at first. She started over. This time she was able to pick out the melody and when she tried a third time she got through two measures with only a few mistakes.

The sweet notes pulled her mind back to that night when Alexander had gracefully swept her across the dance floor to the romantic tune. Emily was about to start crying again. Suddenly she felt it, that feeling like someone else was in the room. Someone was behind her, watching her. She was about to turn around when she felt Alexander’s warm hands slowly slide down over her shoulders to gently caress her upper arms.

Reaching up, she crossed her arms and placed her hands on each of Alexander’s. Her small delicate fingers squeezed his, showing that she was glad his massive hands were there.

“Alexander I’m so …,” Emily began.

Alexander interrupted her with a soft, “Shhh.”

She was quickly silenced as he grabbed her hand and gently guided her up and around to face him. He led her around the bench and into his loving embrace. His warmth brought relief to Emily; she cuddled into him, laying the side of her head against his chest.

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