Authors: Allison Brennan
THIRTY
-
SIX
D
EPUTY
L
ANCE
B
OOKER WALKED
with Nick slowly across the bullpen.
“You did it. You manipulated Sam Harris out of the race.”
“Manipulate is such a strong word, Deputy,” Nick said, shuffling on his crutches. Today was his first full day back in the office after his knee surgery; he already felt the change in his body. The doctor said the surgery had been a miracle.
Maybe it was the change in attitude that made all the difference.
“All I did was play hardball. Just like he did to me before I left for San Diego last month.” They stood outside Nick’s office.
“I want to thank you for putting in a good word for me with Charlie Daniels. I promise, I won’t let you down.”
Nick nodded soberly. “You’ve never let me down, Lance. You’re a good cop. You’ll serve Sheriff Daniels well.”
Nick had convinced Charlie Daniels, the former deputy now in charge of Search and Rescue, to run for sheriff. His family had practically founded Bozeman, and his name kept Sam Harris out of the race. He had a clear field, and had agreed to keep Nick’s team in place.
“And you?”
Nick took a deep breath. “I’m going to get back into shape. And I’m moving to San Diego.”
“To be closer to your brother?”
“That, and other things. You know that song ‘I Left My Heart in San Francisco’?”
Booker tilted his head. “You left yours in San Diego?”
Nick grinned. “Now get back to work. For now, I’m still in charge.”
Booker left and Nick swung himself back on his crutches across the rest of the large headquarters. Slowly, reminding himself not to overdo it. He needed to be in prime condition next weekend when he surprised Carina with a visit—to properly propose to her.
He was going to miss Montana; he missed Carina a whole lot more. The one thing he’d longed for his entire life was unconditional love, and when he’d finally found it, he’d walked away.
He was going to rectify that mistake.
“Hello, cowboy.”
As if he’d conjured her from his thoughts, Carina sat in his chair, boots on his desk, faded jeans and black T-shirt. She wore his hat on her head and had left her thick hair down.
She was the most beautiful thing he’d laid eyes on since he left San Diego three weeks ago.
It hit him then that Carina had come to him. He wanted to pull her into his arms and hold her, devour her mouth with his, take her home to his bed. She wanted him, even though juggling their careers over the next few months wasn’t going to be easy. She wanted him and she loved him, he could see it all in her expressive eyes.
“Hello,” he said, unable to keep the lopsided grin off his face.
She eyed his crutches, pride and love radiating from her face. “You had your surgery.”
“Incredible powers of observation, Detective Kincaid.” He leaned the crutches against his desk and sat in the guest chair. “I’ll admit I’m surprised to see you.”
“I missed you.” She was smiling, but her voice cracked. This was difficult for her, making the first move.
Nick’s heart swelled. “I’m glad.”
“You’re going to make this hard on me, aren’t you?”
“No, I’m not. Come here.”
Carina beamed. For weeks she’d debated giving up what she had—her career, her family, her home—and following Nick. One minute, the thought of seeing her family only on holidays and a week in the summer terrified her. The next minute, knowing if she didn’t follow Nick she’d lose something precious and rare.
True love.
The choice wasn’t easy, but in the end, coming to Nick was the only decision she could have made. She was following her heart for the first time in her life, and she didn’t doubt her decision.
She sat on the edge of his desk, right in front of him, leaned over and touched his face. He pulled her into his lap.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” she said, mindful of his knees.
“Kiss me.”
She touched her lips to his, but the sweet kiss quickly turned hot. His hands grabbed her head, held her to him, as if he were drowning.
“God, I love you, Carina. You don’t know what this means to me, finding you here.”
“I couldn’t lose you.” She feathered kisses on his face.
“You were never going to lose me, Carina.”
He was right about that. Her heart was his, no matter where they were in the world. But she wasn’t so naive as to think a long-distance relationship would work. She in San Diego constantly pressuring him to move to California; he in Montana unable to leave because of duty and honor.
The same duty and honor that had attracted her in the first place.
Tears slipped out and Nick ran his thumbs under her eyes. “Don’t cry, sweetheart.”
“I would have lost you. I’m stubborn. And arrogant. I couldn’t imagine that you could walk away. I’m always the one who walks away. I weigh the pros and cons and cut my losses. But when I started running through the checklist, the bottom line was that no matter where I am in the world, it means nothing if you’re not in my life.”
“Will you marry me?” Nick asked.
“God, yes. I was afraid you wouldn’t ask me again!” She kissed him.
“Reach into my pocket.”
“Here?” She looked around. They’d already drawn several curious onlookers from the squad room beyond the glass-enclosed sheriff’s office. She didn’t mind experimenting in bed, but she wasn’t an exhibitionist.
Nick laughed, moved her over a bit, and pulled something from his pocket. A box. A small box.
“For you.”
She blinked, frowned. Uncertain.
“You don’t like jewelry?” Nick asked, uncertain.
She took the box, cautiously opened it. A solitary round diamond sparkled. Her heart thudded so loud she could hear her rushing blood. “You . . . this . . . I . . . ”
“Can I quote you on that?”
“You planned this? How did you know? Did Dillon tell you I was coming?” She’d told her family two nights ago that she was going to Montana to live with Nick. It had been bittersweet, but in the end, everyone supported her, particularly Dillon.
“No one told me anything. I have a flight booked to San Diego tomorrow morning.”
“You were going to come to San Diego?”
Nick lifted Carina off his lap and put her on his desk. He took her hands and stared into her eyes. “I’m not running for reelection.”
“But you said you had to. That idiot who’s running against you—”
“I fixed it. I found my replacement, a good man who is going to run in my place. Harris has resigned, and my duty is done here. Almost done,” he conceded. “My term doesn’t expire for eight months.”
“Eight months.”
“And then I hoped we could get married and move into your house. Of course, we have to do something about your obsession with white frills and pink.” His face was stern but his blue eyes were laughing.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a loud, wet kiss on the mouth. “Redecorate to your heart’s content,” she said. “Except the bedroom.”
“You mean I have to sleep on pink sheets for the rest of my life?” He looked to the ceiling as if weighing his choices.
She gave a loud, exaggerated sigh. “I
might
concede on the sheets, but the pillows stay.”
He kissed her and said, “Deal.”
She smiled, relieved and happier than she had ever imagined. There had been that tickle of fear that she’d come here and he’d tell her to take a hike.
“I’ll take my house off the market.”
Nick sobered up, stared at her in disbelief. “You were going to move here?
Seriously?
”
She nodded, touched his cheeks with her thumbs. “I couldn’t let you walk out of my life. I gave two weeks’ notice this morning as well.”
“You can call your boss, right? Get your job back?”
“Yes.”
“Eight months, two states isn’t going to be easy.”
“Nothing worth having is easily attained.”
Nick kissed her again, then Carina watched as he slid the engagement ring onto her finger. She was not a weepy woman, but she felt tears in her eyes and squeezed them away.
“I love you, Nick Thomas.”
“Let’s go back to my place, Detective Kincaid. So I can show you how much I love you.”
She glanced at his knees and winked. “Are you sure you’re up for it?”
“Let’s go and find out.”
Also by Allison Brennan
The Prey
The Hunt
The Kill
Praise for Allison Brennan
“New arrival Brennan wastes no time proving she’s a talent to be reckoned with.”
—Romantic Times Book Club
“Brennan does murder better than almost everyone writing in the suspense genre.”
—Armchair Interviews
Read on for a special sneak peak at
S
EE
N
O
EVIL
the next chilling book in the Evil Series by Allison Brennan
ONE
H
OW WOULD YOU KILL HIM
?
I don’t know.
Think about it. He hurt you. He made you touch him. He humiliated you. You must want him to pay.
Yeah, but . . .
You would never
really
kill him. I know that. But you need to get over your anger, release the rage. The only way to be free of him is to picture him without any power over you. Visualize the one person you hate the most in the world dead. Can you?
Yes.
What does he look like?
He’s sitting at his desk.
And you walk in . . . what does he say to you?
“Come here. Kneel.
Now.
”
What do you do?
I go. I have no choice. They’ll send me away . . . I’ve lived on the streets. I’ve been to juvie. It’s worse than sucking his dick.
Picture yourself walking toward the desk. This time, you’re going to say no. This time, you’re going to pay him back for touching you. For making you touch him. How?
I want him to know exactly what it feels like.
And?
I want to cut his dick off and shove it down his throat. Let
him
suck on it.
Good. Very good. Picture him choking on his penis whenever you get angry or upset. That’s the first step to getting rid of the rage, the anger. To be able to heal and become normal.
I’ll never be normal.
Emily Chandler Montgomery would never be normal.
She sat in her idling Volkswagen bug and stared at the looming house in front of her. She didn’t even want to pull into the garage, as if it would swallow her and she’d never escape. She hated coming home.
Home
. What a joke. She had no home. It had disappeared when her father died. All she had was a house of many rooms, none of which welcomed her, except for her tiny sanctuary upstairs.
But where else could she go? She’d run away, and that hadn’t worked. Living on the streets was impossible, especially for a pampered, spoiled rich kid like her.
At least that’s what her shrink had told her.
And in many ways—
most
ways—it was true. She didn’t want to live on the streets and sell her body. Because out there these were her choices: whore or gutter rat. Emily liked her bedroom, her spa, the Olympic-size swimming pool where she could swim laps until her arms ached and her lungs gasped for air. The clothes, the food, the roof.
If only Victor were gone, she could live in the castle without fear. Why had her mother married Judge Victor Montegomery? He was a creep back when they were dating, and he was worse now. A fake. A hypocrite.
I hate you I hate you I hate you!
She pounded her fists on the steering wheel until her hands ached. The rage circulating in her blood made her ears hot, her sight dim. She wanted to break something, but the words of her shrink battled against the anger.
Take a deep breath. Again. Let it out slowly. Focus on your calm place. Picture a blank canvas. Now paint your oasis, the place you feel safe. Paint that in the canvas of your mind. Put yourself there, in the picture.
Emily released the car’s clutch and slowly drove into the garage. Mentally, she was in the ocean, the middle of the sea, with nothing around her. The sea was calm, peaceful, the water a brilliant blue, the sky orange, red, violet in the setting sun.
Her oasis.
As Emily parked her car next to Victor’s Jaguar, her safe place disappeared. She held her keys in her hand and considered running them along the side of his precious sports car. But they’d know she had done it and find a way to punish her. Make her spend another weekend in juvie. She could hear her mother’s cold, disapproving tone. “It’s for your own good, Emily. Your antics have embarrassed the family yet again.”
When you get angry, you let your enemies have control. Take a deep breath. Picture those who torment you getting what’s coming to them. Justice for you and everyone like you. Write about it. Talk about it. Get it out of your system. When you keep your feelings inside, anger wins. Your enemy wins.
Don’t let him win.
Emily took a deep breath, then another. Through the windows on the far side of the garage, the quality of light seemed to have changed. How long had she been sitting in her car? She looked at the time on the dashboard.
Five-thirty?
A full hour? That couldn’t be right.
She picked up her cell phone to check the time. Five-thirty.
This wasn’t the first time she’d worked on controlling the rage only to discover that she’d blanked out on the passage of time.
She grabbed her backpack and reluctantly left the safe haven of her Bug. It was Wednesday, which meant her mother would be home late. Wednesday, Wednesday . . . right, planning for her annual charity auction. This year it was puppies and kitties. Last year it was children. Every year a new cause, a cause that came first. A cause more important than her daughter.
The one year Emily thought her mother had actually cared was the year she raised money for runaway children. Spent time with her, but it was all for show. She had been the poster child. The tears and forgiveness were all an act. It was all for the cameras and society page and to help Judge Victor Montgomery win reelection.
Crystal Montgomery didn’t care about her daughter, and Emily had almost given up caring about that sad fact. But she couldn’t. She even sometimes wondered if she’d ever really
had
a mom. Maybe the memories of them walking on the beach, playing with Barbie’s, making cookies were all a dream. Those good times seemed so far in the past that Emily wasn’t sure if she’d made up some of the details to get herself through the nights when her mother was gone. To get through the days when Victor wasn’t.
Thirteen months and she would legally be able to walk out the door and live on her own. Her trust fund would be hers. She would no longer be dependent on her mother and Victor.
Thirteen months. She prayed she survived that long. It wasn’t that she was worried about Victor killing her. She feared her own hand.
She closed the large, overhead garage door with the remote and walked to the side door that led to a covered walk. Their house was huge, far bigger than the three of them needed, but Crystal and Victor
entertained,
and that meant they needed a big house with huge rooms to fill with people as phony as they.
It struck her as sad that when her dad had been alive the house hadn’t seemed as big and scary, even though she’d been smaller. And there’d only been the three of them then, too. But with her dad, everything was a game. They raced Matchbox cars down the long marble halls, played hide-and-seek in the maze of rooms, slid down the banister of the great center staircase.
The fun died with her dad.
Emily entered the house through the secondary entrance, the one Victor ordered the hired help to use. None of the outside doors used a key. That would be
common
. Emily typed in the security code on the keypad next to the door and the lock sprung. The atmosphere was cool, in both temperature and aesthetics. Her mother had the downstairs professionally redecorated every two years. Last year, she wanted the feeling of the ocean, everything in blues and greens. The sound system piped in canned ocean waves whenever her mother was home.
No music, no mother.
She waited for the intercom’s grating
buzz,
every cell in her body on alert. Victor was home, his Jaguar was in the garage. Of course he was home, it was Wednesday. Her mother was gone, the housekeeping staff had the night off, and Emily
had
to be home. Every day by six p.m. by order of the court.
Damn curfew. Damn the police. Damn the whole fucking system.
And damn
her
for being so stupid. Vandalizing the courthouse. What had she been thinking? Of course, she hadn’t been. Just like when she’d run away. All emotions, no plan. Emily couldn’t see anything beyond her anger. And she was paying for it now. Maybe she deserved it.
The intercom didn’t beep, her stepdad didn’t summon her to his office. She slipped off her sandals to tread soundlessly across the marble floors. Slowly, she walked down the long, wide hall to the center foyer, waiting for the telltale
click
of the intercom and Judge Montegomery’s deep and horrible voice.
Emily, please come to my office.
Nothing. Silence.
Maybe he was on the phone. Maybe he hadn’t been watching the security system and was unaware she’d come home. Maybe he’d hung himself. She could only hope.
She started up the grand staircase, her heart racing. As Emily ascended, she began to run. Free. She was free. She’d lock herself in her room, because he didn’t dare come after her in there. It was always his office, his desk. His domain.
She closed and locked her door behind her, grinning. She leaped onto her bed and jumped up and down like a little kid. Then she went into her bathroom and started the water in her bathtub. Hot, with bubbles.
She wasn’t supposed to drink. In addition to being underage, it was a term of her plea bargain last year since she’d been intoxicated when she’d vandalized the courthouse. But she had a flask of dark rum hidden in her dresser, which she refilled periodically from Victor’s bar.
She had to have something to wash the foul taste of him out of her mouth and mind.
Now she drank in celebration. Locked in her room. Alone. At peace.
Downstairs, Victor Montgomery sat in his desk chair, dead, his bloody body horribly mutilated.