Spin (Boosted Hearts Book 2) (28 page)

Alice Morgan was Noah’s case officer, and she actually seemed pretty great. She’d also arranged for Darcey to have a visit with Noah, which couldn’t come fast enough.

Today, though, was one of the most important visits they’d had so far. Alice was here, in Darcey’s tiny apartment, to inspect the place and discuss what they needed from her if she wanted Noah to live with her.

Darcey watched nervously as the other woman look around. It didn’t take long.

“It’s one room?”

“Yes.” Her stomach sank. “But I’m looking for something else. This would only be temporary.” Yeah, she was looking, but nothing was in her price range. She needed a second job.

“How long have you lived here, Darcey?”

She felt nauseous. “A few months.”

“Okay.” She scribbled something down on her pad. “Shall we take a seat? We can go over a few things and go from there, okay?”

“Of course. Sorry. Please, take a seat.” God, she sucked at this stuff. “Do you want a drink or something?”

The other woman shook her head. “I’m fine.”

They sat and Darcey watched as Alice pulled a file from her bag, shuffling through some papers.

“You come across as a straightforward person, so I’m not going to beat around the bush.” Alice’s eyes were kind, but the woman was all business. “I’ve talked to your brother several times. He wants to be with you, Darcey, very much. We take the child's wishes into consideration along with what we feel would be best for him or her.” A small frown creased her brow. “I’ve met your stepfather… I shouldn’t say this, but I have to agree with Noah. I’d really like to have the pair of you reunited.”

Darcey’s heart started to thud like a jackrabbit’s in her chest. When she’d met this woman, she’d known she was no pushover, and she’d hoped like hell she’d see right through Len. In her position, she couldn’t play favorites, but she just kinda had.

“He can come to me?”

“We need you to ace this assessment first, Darcey, and right now, you’re not. Your income isn’t where I’d like it to be. You also need a bigger apartment.” That kind smile was aimed at her again. “And you need to apply to have your criminal record made exempt.”

“Okay.” Darcey’s head was spinning. “How… I don’t know…”

“You were young, it wasn’t a violent crime, and you’ve had no convictions since. It should be fairly easy. I know it seems like a lot, but you can do this. I’ll help you with the exemption, so all you need to focus on is your finances and getting a better place, okay?”

“Sounds good.”

Darcey thought she might actually break down. How the hell was she going to find a better place? She couldn’t just pull money out of her ass. She had no qualifications, no skills apart from working elbows-deep in crap.

Alice stayed for a while longer, walking her through the forms needed so she could apply for her exemption, going as far as helping her fill them out. It made her sick, that the thing she thought was her biggest roadblock to getting Noah seemed so simple and straightforward. All this time, instead of being under the Ramirez brothers’ thumbs, she should have been working her ass off, making money and setting herself up in a better place.

God, she’d screwed up, and now Noah was paying for it.

Alice finally left and Darcey leaned heavily against the door.

What the hell am I going to do?

She slid to the floor, arms wrapped around her knees. Somehow, she had to figure out a way.

Get it together, Darcey.

There was no time to feel sorry for herself. She had to pull it together, come up with a plan of attack. Noah needed her to be strong.

Picking herself up off the floor, she went to get changed.

Her phone beeped, alerting her to a text.

Joe:
Got some business tonight. See u after?

Business meant he’d be out boosting cars for Len, since that fucker was now in charge of the Ramirez family.

Staring at the phone, she slumped down onto her bed.

Their time was up. She’d already let things between them go on longer than she should have. She couldn’t be with a man who could possibly get caught for grand theft auto, and she couldn't risk Len finding out it was Joe she was seeing, not when Noah’s future was still hanging in the balance.

God only new what Len would do.

And not only to her. Joe was still tied to him and would be for a long time yet. Thank God Len kept that part of the business away from Edith, so she hadn’t recognized him when she saw them together. Their situation was impossible. She had to keep her nose clean. Being with Joe was too dangerous. She’d be risking everything to continue spending time with him. It had to stop.

Tapping out a reply, she tightened her fingers around her phone and forced herself to hold it together. Just thinking about what she had to do, what she had to say when he got there, made her nauseous.

She had to lie—had to tell the man she was completely, undeniably in love with, that she didn’t want to see him anymore.

That she didn’t want him.

What choice did she have? If he found out what had happened, what Len had wanted from her—that Noah was now in foster care—he’d flip out. He’d go to Len and beat the shit out of him. She didn’t doubt that for one second.

She couldn’t risk him doing that. It would blow back on her, could mess up her chances to get back her brother, but the ramifications to Joe would be far worse.

Len was capable of anything right now. The man had lost his grip on reality.

Which meant she had to finally end it. Tonight.

~ * ~

It was late when Darcey heard the door rattle.

Joe was picking the lock, rather than waking her. The guy was sweet that way. Was sweet in a whole lot of ways.

But she wasn’t in bed; she was sitting cross-legged on the couch, the lamp on the small table beside it the only light on, waiting for him. If she’d gone to bed, she would have woken with him snuggled up behind her. How could she turn him away if he had those strong, protective arms around her? She couldn’t. She knew that much.

The door opened and he stopped in his tracks as soon as he saw her.

He blinked down at her several times then frowned. “What are you still doing up?” He closed the door behind him and took a step into the room, but he didn’t come closer, a wary expression on his face. “What’s going on, Darcey?”

Just like that. He took one look at her and knew there was something wrong.

She climbed to her feet and crossed her arms, fingers curled into tight fists. “I was waiting up for you actually, we…ah, we need to talk.”

A rough breath burst past his lips and he swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple sliding up and down his throat. “Let’s talk in the morning.”

He took a step toward her and she took an involuntary one back.

“No. We need to talk now.”

He stared at her for several long seconds.

Oh God.
He knew. He knew what she was going to say. “Joe…”

“Don’t,” he rasped. “Just…don’t.” He shook his head, an almost desperate expression taking hold of his strong features. “Whatever the fuck you’re about to say…” He took another step closer. “Just…don’t.”

How was it, with all the shit that had happened to her and Noah the last few years, that this moment felt like the worst of her life? How? It should be impossible, but it was the truth. It hurt like hell, and she hadn’t even said the words yet. Just the idea of Joe walking out that door and never coming back destroyed her.

Darcey forced herself to start talking. “Um…so I’ve been thinking, and ah… Yeah, t-things between us have been moving too fast. I don’t…that’s not what…”

“Darcey,” he growled.

She ignored him, eyes locked on a spot over his shoulder, and kept talking. If she didn’t say it now, she’d never say it. “I need space. I’m… I’m feeling crowded. I’m going to be busy for a while, so I think we should stop…” She felt ill and had to choke out her next words. “Stop seeing each other.”

Space was the last thing she wanted. God, she wanted to cling tighter, hang onto him with everything she had. Lay all the demons beating at her door at his feet and watch him destroy every last one of them. Because he could, he would. Joe made her world better just by being in it.

The back of her eyes started stinging. She’d wanted Joe to be her forever.

But he couldn’t.

“You’re ending it? Just like that?” His nostrils flared, his jaw hardening. “You think you can just say it’s over and I’ll vanish?”

She hugged herself tighter. “That’s what I want, yes.”

He was in front of her in two big strides, arms curling around her like iron bands. “Bullshit. You don’t want that. I know you don’t. Tell me what the hell’s going on, Darcey.”

He wouldn’t let her free when she tried to shove him away. The way he felt up against her—his scent, his warmth—it was too much.

“You knew what I wanted when we started this. You said you were okay with it,” she rasped.

“Well, I’m not
okay
with it now,” he rumbled.

“You have to be.” She forced herself to meet his intense stare. “Joe.” He flinched when she said his name, and it killed her. “Me? This? Nah.” She shook her head. “Serious isn’t your thing, and we both know it. It was fun, but we need to end it before it’s not fun anymore, right?”

He stilled, every muscle locking tight. “Fun?”

She swallowed the rock lodged in her throat. “You’re not this guy. You must be missing the clubs with Adam, the…”

“Hooking up with random women?”

Now it was her turn to flinch.

“Is that what you really want, Peaches?”

His voice was broken, bitter, and she hated it. Hated that she’d hurt him.

“You want me to go out and fuck the first piece of ass that offers?”

“We were…” She had to clear her throat to force the lies out. “We were never in a relationship, Joe. We were just two screwed up people fucking to pass the time. That’s all.”

“That’s how you really feel?”

His eyes were as dark as coal, locked on hers, searching for the truth in her words.

“Yes.” She shoved at his chest, but still, he wouldn’t let her go.

He spun suddenly and pushed her against the wall. His mouth barely an inch from hers. He didn’t kiss her, though. And God her lips ached, tingled with the desperate need to feel his mouth on hers. Instead, he slid his nose along hers, his big body surrounding her. All that hard strength holding her where he wanted her. She was seconds away from giving in, from confessing all. She couldn’t take much more.

But she kept her mouth shut. She had Noah to think about, and she couldn’t trust Joe not to do something rash and put himself in danger. She’d made the right decision.

He nuzzled the side of her throat, breath coming in rough pants.

Oh God.

Darcey kept her hands down, pressed against the wall at her back, when all she wanted to do was grab on to him and never let go.

They stayed like that for the longest time—neither one speaking. Then suddenly, he let her go.

He stepped back and, without another word, he turned and walked out the door, slamming it hard enough to rattle the windows.

He was gone.

It was over.

Chapter Twenty-One

J
oe flicked on the lights and walked across the concrete garage floor, dragging off his shirt as he went. Throwing it on the closest car, he went at the punching bag hanging in the corner like a man possessed. Knuckles bare, he pounded the worn leather hard enough each blow jarred his entire body. He kept at it until the only sound he could hear in the empty space was his grunts and rasped breaths. Until all he could feel was the sting and throb of his split knuckles as each blow connected. Desperate to drown out Darcey’s words, her rejection.

Serious isn’t your thing and we both know it.

Yeah, he was the life of the fucking party.

We were just two screwed up people fucking to pass the time. That’s all.

Good enough to pass the time with, but nothing more.

He’d left her place, near out of his damn mind. Angry, so fucking angry. With her, with himself. He’d fucked things up between them, and he had no idea how. Maybe he was the clueless clown his family always thought he was. He’d missed something, something so important she’d felt the need to cut him loose.

He smashed his fist into the bag.

He fucking loved her. But it didn’t matter. None of it mattered.

“Joe.” Hugh’s voice echoed behind him, loud, concerned.

Joe ignored him and fired another shot.

His brother touched his shoulder. “Joe, fuck, man. What’s going on?”

“Go. I’ll be fine tomorrow.” It was a massive fucking lie. He wouldn’t be fine tomorrow, but he’d have the mask firmly back in place. Rage swelled through him. He’d bottle that shit up like he bottled everything else up, plaster a smile on his face and carry the fuck on. Like he always did.