Spooky Hijinks (14 page)

“Yes,” I said, trying not to laugh now.

“Why would the pastor be at Marjory’s house? Why can’t he just come here?”

“Because he’s Marjory’s brother is why. Get up now, or I’ll have Andrew carry you to the car.”

“Don’t put me into this. I’m with Wilson. The news will be on soon,” Andrew protested as he winked.

I felt my eyes widen as my eyelids went to fluttering with a muscle tick of some sort.

Andrew’s eyes grew as he watched me having what must have looked to be a sudden attack, and he said to Wilson, “Seriously, we better get a move on before my woman has a conniption.”

I led the way to the Cadillac and waited until Mr. Wilson sat in the passenger’s seat, and I sat in the back with Eleanor, allowing Andrew to drive after he put Wilson’s walker in the trunk. I rattled off the directions as he drove off.

“I need to learn how to make a face like that, Agnes,” Eleanor whispered to me. “It really got them moving, but I thought you were having a stroke for a minute there.”

Ignoring Andrew’s raised brow as he drove, I admitted, “I don’t think I’ve ever been that mad before. That man of yours is going to be a handful.”

“He’s not bad, just a little set in his ways. Whatever his first name is, I bet it’s one humdinger of a name.”

“Maybe it’s Rumpelstiltskin.”

“Or feminine,” Eleanor added.

Andrew was soon on Monument Road. The Bill and Marjory lived near the golf course, but why wouldn’t they, since for the most part, they dressed in golf clothing, not to mention that they matched most times. They were known around East Tawas as quite the golf enthusiasts.

When Andrew rolled up to a quite large, two-story house with gray siding, I was a little shocked. I couldn’t imagine they needed a house that size, and stairs sure weren’t good to have when you’re our age. At least there were only a few steps that led to the porch.

Andrew helped Mr. Wilson maneuver the steps and handed his walker to him just as Marjory opened the door to greet us. “Hello, there. I was hoping you didn’t get lost on the way over with the snow piling up out there.”

She held the door, and we made our way inside and noticed a man holding a cocktail glass in his hand, sloshing the liquid onto the carpet. Surely this couldn’t actually be the pastor?

“Put that drink down before you ruin my carpet,” Marjory demanded. “Sorry, Agnes. Wilfred is usually better behaved than this.”

“Is that—”

“Tea, he’s drinking tea,” Marjory insisted. “Wilfred, these are the people getting married on Christmas Day.”

He wasn’t looking at us, but at a lamp. He wobbled over there and took off the shade, promptly placing it on his head, a foolish grin on his face.

“Tea my ass,” Mr. Wilson said. “That man is pickled.” He lowered himself down to a chair. “Although this is better than watching the news.”

Marjory went to remove the lampshade, but Wilfred hopped to the sofa, jumping on the cushions. “Oh, no you don’t. This is my party hat. Go find your own.”

Andrew began to laugh now. “That’s not fair. I don’t have a party hat.”

“There’s another one over there.” Wilfred pointed out another lamp.

Before Andrew made a move, I said, “Don’t you dare.”

Mr. Wilson got up now, moved his walker across the room and planted the lampshade that I wouldn’t let Andrew put on, on his head. We all watched Wilson sit back down before I finally said, “Will you be able to marry us on Christmas Day or not?”

“Are there going to be drinks?” Wilfred asked.

“After the ceremony, there will be drinks at the Iosco Sportsmen’s Club, where the reception will be held.”

“I never took you for the gun range type,” Bill Hays said, joining us.

“I’ve been at one before, just not at that particular one. But my granddaughter’s husband is a member and will be booking the clubhouse for the reception. He’s even springing for the bill. He mentioned that there might be wild game served.”

“That sounds great,” Andrew said. “I hope it’s venison. I’m not the hunter type, but it’s great eating.”

“Not the hunter type?” Wilfred said. “Where are you from, California?”

“Nope. I just don’t think it’s a good idea for any attorney to go hunting. It would be open season on me.” He laughed.

“Probably right about that,” Wilfred said. He took off the lampshade and sat down like a normal person. “I do just a basic ceremony, if you folks don’t mind. I’m not a Catholic, Lutheran, or Baptist.”

“Fine by me.”

“Will you be saying your own vows?”

“Yes,” Andrew said. “It’s more personal that way.”

I gulped. I hadn’t thought about that. “But doesn’t that mean we have to come up with our own vows, like write them down on a piece of paper and memorize them?” I asked.

“That’s exactly right,” Andrew said.

“I’m not good at that sort of thing,” Mr. Wilson said. “But I’ll come up with something.”

Oh, great. If Wilson was coming up with his own vows, I had to write mine, too. Who would have ever thought that Andrew would come up with something like that? I never knew he had it in him.

“So you’re free on Christmas Day, then?”

“Yes. I’m retired these days, but I still have a legal right to perform ceremonies. It’s been quite a while since I’ve married anyone your ages, but I’m all for it.”

“I know. Some people our age would much rather be satisfied with just seeing each other when it was convenient with both of them,” I said. When Andrew gave me the eye, I added, “I didn’t mean I wanted to do it that way. It’s silly to just date when I’d rather have you with me full time, Andrew. Just as long as I’m not expected to move out of the Tawas area.”

“And what about Detroit? Are you that dead set against staying in the city sometimes?”

“I’m sorry, Andrew, but I’m just not a city type of girl. It was bad enough when I lived in Saginaw, and that’s not nearly the size of Detroit.”

Andrew eased himself down into a chair. “I see. Well, as you know, I’m still a practicing attorney, and I need to be in Detroit on occasion.”

“That’s fine. I’m not asking you to change who you are. Just please don’t make me move.”

“Look, I never said anything about moving there, but I’d like you along with me sometimes.”

“I know, but only for a few short days.”

“You’d love Greektown at night. It’s a beautiful place with all the lights.”

“I’m sure it is, but I love Tawas more.”

“Okay, I won’t mention it again, but only because I love you.”

“Well, it seems like you two really should have worked all of this out earlier,” Marjory said. “How about you, Mr. Wilson and Eleanor? Who’s moving where?”

“I’ll move in with my sweet Eleanor. I love it at the beach, all those honeys walking by in their bikinis.” He chuckled.

“Of course, it might be hard to see with two black eyes,” Eleanor threatened, giving Wilson a menacing look, and then laughed. “Just kidding.”

We had a good laugh over that one, and Marjory brought a bottle of wine, and Andrew popped the cork for her with a golden corkscrew. Then the wine was poured, and we toasted to our coming nuptials that seemed to be rushing forward like a steam engine.

              
Chapter Twelve

By the time we left the Hays’s house, we all were mighty tipsy. We dropped Mr. Wilson and Andrew off, declining to spend the night there since I needed to be back at the mansion to see how things were going with the ghosts.

Once we rolled into the Butler Mansion, Stuart met me at the door. “Oh, there you are. I was wondering where you could be.”

“Making wedding preparations. We secured a date at the lighthouse on Christmas, but we’ll have to stay there on Christmas Eve to decorate and clean. We have everything about set now, I think. Sophia’s husband is renting a clubhouse for the reception, Millicent is ordering flowers, Marjory’s brother Wilfred is a pastor and promised to marry us. All we need to do now is get the marriage license.” I paused in thought for a moment. “I really hope you’ll give me your blessing.”

Stuart massaged his chin in thought. “Look, I think it’s just hard for me to get used to Andrew. It’s not like I think there’s something wrong with him. It’s just that—”

“He’s not your dad?” I interjected.

“Exactly. I suppose, in my mind, I only ever imagined you with Dad.”

“I’m sure you have, but your father died when I was in my forties, and I must say that I loved your father very much. At first, when Andrew proposed, it was hard for me. I still miss your father horribly, even after all these years, but I need to move on and give happiness another chance. I really love Andrew, and he helped me feel again. He’s a great guy.”

“I’m beginning to see that, but I’m also very protective of you, Mother.” He smiled. “Plus, he passed the background check.”

“You checked him out, did you? Good. Now you can just put all your doubts aside?”

Stuart gave me a hug. When he stepped back, he said, “Yes, Mother. I have. You have my blessing, but if that man ever hurts you, it won’t go well for him is all I’m saying.”

Eleanor clapped her hands in excitement. “You two are making me cry. It’s so sweet the way you two have made amends after Stuart has been gone so long. I just wish my son was half the man you are, Stuart. Then maybe he would come to see me, but after that time when he put me in a nursing home, it’s quite obvious he doesn’t care for me at all.” She wiped back tears now. “I-I’m okay with that. I wish things could be different, but I’ve come to the realization that I’ll never see him again, and that’s just fine by me. I don’t trust that he wouldn’t try to lock me up somewhere again anyway.”

“Well, then, it’s a good thing he stays away. I’d hate to take the man to task for treating you badly, Eleanor. In many ways, you’re like a sister to me.”

“I guess that makes you my Auntie Eleanor, then,” Stuart said as he gave Eleanor a hug, which, from the look on her face, she thoroughly enjoyed.

“Would you let Stuart go, Eleanor?”

“Sorry,” she said as she finally released him.

It was actually quite nice that Stuart worried about me like this, even if it was unnecessary.

Stuart smiled and then became serious as he said, “I had worried that you were investigating the break-ins around town.”

“Not at all, but how did it go with the Hill boys when you went there?”

“Actually, we haven’t made it there yet. We had to meet with the rest of our team, and by the time we finished, it was late, so we agreed to go there first thing in the morning. Why?”

I felt lightheaded now. If the ATF hadn’t gone to the Hills’ house, who had?

“Th-That can’t be. Are you positive nobody went there today?”

“Yes, why?”

“It’s just that we went there. I wanted to ask them a few questions, and oh—my.” I was trembling so badly now that I eased myself onto the chair, with Eleanor and Stuart looking on.

“What’s the matter?” Stuart’s wife, Moraine, asked, rushing forward.

“I’m not sure, but it doesn’t sound good.”

“What doesn’t sound good?” Moraine asked.

Eleanor began. “We went to question the Hill boys, and when we heard cars pulling in there, we left out the back.”

“W-We thought it was you and the ATF, and I didn’t want to get into any trouble, so we left right away.”

“I told you not to get involved with this case, Mother.”

“I-I know, but I’m friends with the Hill boys. They’ve helped me in the past. Their mother is one of our friends, too.”

Moraine, like Stuart, was also an FBI agent. “We better get over there,” Moraine said heading for the door.

All Eleanor and I could do was look on, astonished, as they rushed out the door. “What happened?” Caroline asked as she popped in with Malcolm and Niles by her side.

“I think the Hill brothers are in trouble.” I then explained what had happened at their place earlier.

Millicent lingered close by. “And you were there, risking your lives, again. You really can’t be doing that. I’d hate for anything to happen to either of you, not with unexpected company coming soon.”

“Unexpected company?”

“Yes, ghost hunters, to be exact. They had the strangest name, though.”

“G.A.S.P.?” Eleanor and I both blurted out.

“They call themselves Ghost Association Special Police, but it would spell GASP, I suppose.”

“We’ve met up with them before, but I guess I should be happy that they stayed away for this long, with the naughty spirits we have in this place.”

Caroline and her spirit escorts left.

“When will they be here?”

“Tomorrow morning. With any luck, the ghosts will behave themselves, and we can downplay the whole haunting thing.”

“I have a headache for sure now,” I said. “And I had drinks and no dinner.”

“I can whip up some roast beef leftovers. Come into the dining room.”

Eleanor and I sat in the dining room all by ourselves, and I mused aloud, “I wonder who might have gone over to the Hill brothers’ house?”

“It might be other militia members.”

“I suppose, but I believe someone is leaking information from their camp.”

“Like Harvey Smith,” Eleanor added. “Even the sheriff doesn’t trust him.”

“That hardly makes him a suspect, but it’s funny how the Hills took their guns over there, and they disappear again the same day.”

“We need to question the other people who were robbed that night, too.”

“I wish we had, but with our wedding preparations made, now we can focus on the case at hand. I just hope that the Hills are okay.”

“Me, too, but I’m sure Stuart will tell you. He’ll most likely be back to ask us more questions.”

“I’m counting on it. I just wish that we had seen something, or who went over there for sure.”

Millicent brought two plates into the room, loaded with roast beef, mashed potatoes, and corn.

“Wow, I didn’t expect to get this much food.”

“I know, but I saved a plate for each of you. I figured that you’d come home at some point, and that you’d be hungry.”

As I lifted a fork, I asked, “How did things go here today? Any more disturbances?”

“Oh, no. It was a real peaceful day. That’s why I was shocked when the ghost hunters called. Sara Knoxville gave them permission to do an investigation, too. She’ll be here tomorrow also.”