Starbound (5 page)

His brows slammed together. “Did you come here to discuss art?”

“No.” I was confused by his sudden icy change in attitude. One minute he looked happy to see me, and the next he looked ready to boot my butt out of the shop. “I came to thank you for last night, but I think I’ve changed my mind.”

He ran a hand through his dark, already messy hair. “Whatever. It was no big deal, and you could have done that on Monday. There was no need for a special trip.”

His shirt was stained with what I thought was oil, and I didn’t think he could be any sexier. Since when was I into blue collar? “I know.” God, he was making me nervous. My stomach fluttered with butterflies. The last thing I wanted to admit was that I didn’t want to wait to see him. I tucked my hair behind my ear.

Smooth, Katia. Way to sound like a dork
. I was starting to think that kiss wasn’t as earth-shattering as I’d imagined.

He shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal. “Whatever, don’t mention it. It’s what any decent guy would do.” Grabbing the piece of paper from my hand, he wadded it up and tossed it into the trash.

That was just it. I was pretty sure that Seth wasn’t always a decent guy, but I knew in the depth of my heart, he would never really hurt me. Bruise my pride sure, but I got the feeling he would walk through fire before he let me get hurt.

“How about I repay you? I could buy you lunch…for the trouble and all.” The words were tumbling out of my mouth before I even realized what I had said.

Had I really just asked him out?

“You don’t have to do that,” he replied, giving me an out.

My face fell. I hadn’t expected him to say no. I guess I was used to guys jumping at the chance to go out with me, and I hadn’t thought Seth would be any different.

God that sounded so superficial. When had I become such a snob?

Just then his boss Eddy walked into the shop from the garage. He had a streak of grease on his rough cheek, which was speckled with stubby hairs. “Did I just hear you refuse a pretty lady lunch? Seth, boy, what the hell is wrong with you?” Eddy’s voice was gruff, just like the rest of him. I instantly liked him. It was nice to have an ally.

I grinned. “It’s just lunch. I’m not asking you to marry me or anything.”

Seth choked on air. “Fine,” he agreed, not looking happy about it. “If it gets the two of you off my back, I’ll go. But just lunch.”

My smile widened. “Then we can talk about the number of babies we’ll have.” I was totally teasing, but Seth’s face went pale.

Eddy laughed long and deep. “I like you, girl. It’s about time someone cornered this one.” He gave Seth a pat on the back.

Seth scowled.

We walked next door to a little burger joint, nothing fancy. Being so close to him, I couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss. I wanted to apologize for my forward behavior, yet at the same time I wanted to tell him that I hadn’t regretted what happened.

I didn’t have the first clue where to start.

My arm brushed his as he held the door open, something Matt never would have done. A spark shot over my skin. I met his eyes, curious to see if he had felt anything. His green eyes darkened. I gulped. Everything about Seth was so…intense.

I pushed aside my hair and walked through the door. As we waited in line for our food, I could feel the heat from his body. It was exciting and comforting at the same time, and I might have stood a little closer than necessary.

I struggled for something to say to break this awkward silence that had settled between us. “You probably eat here all the time.”

That sounded so lame
.
Just attach a giant L to my forehead please.

He glanced down at me from the oversized menu plastered on the wall behind the registers. “It’s convenient.”

I could feel the scrutiny from his mossy eyes, trying to figure me out.
Good luck
, I thought. I couldn’t even understand who I was anymore. But I wanted to change that. I no longer wanted to be that stuck-up, popular girl who thought her shit didn’t stink.

After we got our food, we took a seat in one of the red leather booths. I didn’t know what to say, so I munched on a fry while I studied Seth. He was so darn good looking. Why had we lost touch again? Right now staring at him, I couldn’t think of one valid reason. He was ten times the guy any other boy at school was.

And I didn’t just mean his insane looks. He also had manners under his bad boy exterior. “I’m glad you still draw,” I said, picking up another fry.

He shrugged. “It passes the time.”

“You’re really good. Are you thinking about going to an art school next year?” I thought it might be totally creepy if I mentioned I still had a few of his drawings he had given me in fifth grade. I couldn’t seem to stop staring at his face, like I was trying to memorize every detail.

“Look, Kats,” he said, pulling me out of my drool-fest. “I don’t know what you are trying to pull here, but I don’t have time for games.”

My back stiffened, and I dropped the fry that had been in my hand, taken aback.
Jerk.
“I’m not playing any games. Forgive me for trying to be nice and thank you.”

“Since when is Katia Montgomery nice.”

Ouch. That stung. I take back any thoughts of Seth being a decent guy. He was an asshole. But in reality what he said wasn’t any less true, at least for the old Katia. I didn’t want to be that girl anymore, especially with Seth. I looked down at my plate. “Maybe I’m turning over a new leaf.”

“Yeah right, and the grass is pink,” he said gruffly.

My head snapped up.

“You haven’t spoken more than two words to me at a time since sixth grade and you suddenly want to be my best friend. Let’s be real here. You and I don’t run in the same circle. Not anymore.” There was anger in his voice.

I slumped in the booth like he had slapped me. “Rot in hell, Seth. I can’t believe we were ever friends.” I did the most mature thing I could think of. Actually at this point, I wasn’t thinking at all. I just grabbed the first thing in front of me and dumped the contents all over Seth’s lap. It just so happened to be my chocolate mint milkshake. Then I marched my pissed-off butt right out of the restaurant, leaving him alone at the table to finish his cheeseburger, soaking wet.

Chapter 5

Seth

I sat at the table covered in minty glop and watched her storm out of the restaurant. Chunks of chocolate were on my shirt. Sitting plastered in goo, I ignored all the curious glances and snickers from the other patrons. They could all screw themselves.

Damn
.

That hadn’t gone according to plan. The only thing that had come out of it was maybe it would keep her away, which had been why I acted so harshly. It was for Kat’s own good. I hated the look that had sprung into her eyes. Hurt. Pain. The fact that I had caused it sliced at my heart.

Damn it
.

Why had she come into the shop today?

Why now?

We had successfully avoided each all through high school, now in our last year before we went our separate ways, she wanted to be my friend? One year. That was all that was left before I put continents between us.

She had been right about one thing. Art school. I had applied at a foreign art academy in Europe. It was both pleasant and alarming that Kat knew me. Really knew me, even after all these years. She had known how drawing was my escape, just like I knew that the real Kat wasn’t shallow and heartless. She never could be.

But that was not what I had implied. What I said hadn’t been entirely true. There was still very much the old Kat in there. She had proven it. I wanted to kick my own ass. There was this overwhelming urge to run after her and beg her to forgive me. I clutched the edges of the table, wrestling with the need. Kat needed to keep her distance from me.
I
needed her to keep her distance. It was the only way.

I could still see the flames spitting from her eyes. Kat was a hellfire when she got mad. There was a fire crackling behind those incandescent eyes that had always been there. It was part of why I loved her.

I grabbed my heart and gritted my teeth.

Blast it
.

Pangs shot in my chest. Admitting how I felt hurt like a mother trucker, knowing that I could never have her.

Fate was the biggest bitch.

I pushed my food aside, no longer having an appetite. I kept telling myself this was for the best. I repeated the phrase the whole way back to the garage in tempo with my feet crunching on gravel.
For. The. Best. For. The. Best.
It had no bearing on my mood. I was just as temperamental.

When I sauntered back into the shop, Eddy took one look at me and laughed his ass off. “What the hell happened to you? Wait. Don’t tell me. Let me guess. She was about five-five with angel curls and killer dimples.” In his own way, my boss cared about me. He had no kids of his own and took it upon himself to harass me at every opportunity.

I stabbed him with a dry look, and then headed in the back for a clean shirt. Maybe if I wasn’t a covered in ice cream I might have found humor in the situation. Tossing the milkshake-covered shirt into my bag, my lips twitched. I would never be able to look at that shirt again without thinking of Kat.

She was something else.

Katia

Seth was such a jerk. Jerk didn’t even cut it. He was the scum on the bottom of my heels. It was such a pity, because he was an amazing kisser. And he made me feel more alive than I’d felt in a very long time. He ignited something inside me. If he didn’t open his mouth, he’d be damn near perfect.

I drove home in a blind rage and even had to circle the block a few times before I let off enough steam. When I pulled into my driveway, I sunk into the seat and hit the steering wheel with my hands. “How could I be so dumb?” I seethed, and then I swore.

The last thing I wanted was to face my family. My emotions were written all over my face, and the downside of having a mom with goddess blood was that she could detect every emotion. Mom had a knack for knowing when something was wrong. Mother intuition. Magick. Clairvoyance. Whatever you wanted to call it, she had it, which could be annoying or consoling, depending on your mood.

Today, I did not want my feelings picked apart. I just wanted to escape to my room and wallow in my own self-pity. I didn’t want to see another human all day. Not until I finished licking this wound Seth left on my heart. Or maybe it was Matt.

I was an emotional wreck. It was possible I was projecting my breakup baggage on Seth, looking to grasp onto something that had never been there. Or maybe Seth just wasn’t into me and he really did loathe me.

The thought made my stomach drop.

Creeping from my car to the house, I made it up into my bedroom undetected. Someone upstairs must love me. Once I clicked the little lock in place, I let out a long swoosh of air and collapsed on my violet bed. I stared at the white butterflies on my wall, contemplating my life.

School had barely begun and already I was dreading the rest of the year. I didn’t want my senior year to be a repeat of the last three: homework, cheer practice, basketball games, and endless parties.

I wanted my last year to be memorable, exciting. I enjoyed hanging out with my friends, but I felt like all we did was talk about the same trivial things over and over. They didn’t really know
me
. How could they when I was keeping such a huge secret? Being a nixie had suddenly become a small piece of me. It had taken a back burner. I hardly ever practiced anymore in my attempt to be
normal
. I was just now realizing how special it was to have magick and how much I missed the exhilarated rush flowing through my veins.

Part of the reason I stopped practicing was because I thought my magick was insignificant. It felt so lame compared to what the others in my circle could do.

Olivia, the free-spirited soul, was the only one of the group with an affinity. Hers was with fire, and she had the flaming red hair to match.

Elena, though she was moody and hard to get along with, could bring anything she touched to life and had the power to heal.

Zeke, sweet Zeke. With his fair colored hair and blue eyes, he had been the prankster of the group and Seth’s best friend. Zeke played with people’s heads. He could make you think things, erase memories, and much more.

Then there was Seth. What couldn’t Seth do was a better question. Besides having a talent for drawing, he was also a gifted nixie. I’d seen him turn water into fire, rocks into crystals, and pluck a star from the sky.

No joke.

Seth was mesmerizing.

And then there was me. What were my magickal abilities? Puzzles. I could solve puzzles, mazes, anything problematic in seconds.

Ugh, why couldn’t I have gotten something kickass like invisibility or teleportation?

As you got older, you honed your ability, strengthened the gift you were blessed with. Just like anything in life, practice makes perfect. I really hadn’t seen the point. I wasn’t going to be able to use my gift to save lives, so I just stopped altogether—cold turkey. Why? I hadn’t felt blessed. I felt like the goddess blood in my veins had been wasted on me.

Thinking about the circle brought back memories I had buried. The five of us had gotten into trouble, but it had been fun. Not at all like my current friends’ idea of
fun
. It made my heart heavy and achy remembering.

If I tried to befriend them now, would they even accept my place in the circle again? Without me, the circle had lost its balance. They could still practice as a group, but their combined powers would have weakened immensely without the fifth. If with my measly powers, I would have amped up magickal juice.

There was a huge part of me that was scared to be rejected, although I had rejected them years ago. It would serve me right if they shunned me.

I was past the point of caring what everyone thought of me. Being popular was not all what it was hyped to be, and ironically I was more alone than ever. I stared at the white butterflies on my walls until the sun went down.