Stardancer (Tellaran Series) (21 page)

But I know what his promises mean now.

When Kinara caught Nisara’s eye the girl flushed and dropped her eyes.

Kinara shot to her feet. She curtly announced that she was needed back at the Az’anti estate. Cenna’s brood had obviously settled themselves in for an all night celebration and her pronouncement was met with startled looks and confusion. Cenna quickly stepped in, hushing their objections and galvanizing her relatives into making their farewells to the Az’anti.

Upon climbing from the litter Kinara turned toward the building where her crew had been held, thinking to find Kyndan there, but Aidar reached out to stop her.

“Don’t touch me!” she hissed.  

Az-kye’s moons had risen and by their light she could see him go pale.

“I will have him brought to you.”

“Now,” she snapped, striding away from him even as he gave the orders to a guard.

He followed her to the rooms they shared.

“
Cy’atta
, I could do no other.”

She rounded on him. “Maybe you can explain that to the crew you promised to send home. Maybe Tedah will understand why he’ll never see his family again. You and he were friends, right? Oh, yeah, I forgot. He couldn’t be your friend. He’s
Tellaran
.”

“
Cy’atta
,” he said hoarsely, spreading his hands. “The Elders ordered it so.”

“I don’t care!” she shouted. “You broke every promise to me! You gave Nisara to Dael? Were you even going to tell me? And Kyndan…” She stopped for a moment, dizzy with hatred. “You let me think he was dead, you let me grieve for him. Oh, gods, I was so grateful when you killed Malm! I thought you avenged my brother when all along you
knew
he was here!”

“Kinna?”

Thinner than she had ever seen him, Kyndan’s face was bruised and swollen, his eyes deeply shadowed, his brown hair falling over his forehead. Two of her warriors held him between them in the doorway by his upper arms.

Kinara flew across the room. “Take your hands off him!”

The startled warriors released him and Kyndan fell into her arms.

She bared her teeth at them. “Get out!”

The warriors obeyed her instantly. 

“It’s all right. Everything’s all right now,” she murmured. 

Kyndan shrank back. Horrified, she realized she’d spoken in Az-kye. 

“It’s all right,” she repeated in Tellaran. 

“I can’t believe it’s you!” Kyndan held her face in his hands. “I can’t believe you’re really here. When I saw you — Gods, I thought I’d finally gone crazy.” He shook his head. “Have they hurt you at all?”

“No,” she said, pressing his palm against her cheek. “No one’s hurt me.”

“What are you
doing
here, Kinna? How the hell did you get to Az-kye?”

“I came—” her voice broke and she tried again. “I thought you were dead. I wanted to make them pay so I took a ship—”

“
You took a ship?
”

“To destroy the
Ty’pran
, but . . . That doesn’t matter now. You’re alive.  That’s all that matters.”

His glance took in her clothes, her jewels. “Why are you dressed like that?”  He frowned. “You look like one of their women.”

Her eyes went unwillingly to Aidar, standing frozen where she had left him.

Kyndan’s nostrils flared. “Not
him
!”

Aidar’s face had gone deathly white. 

“What?” Kinara asked. “Why not him?”

“He’s the
Ty’pran
’s commander. He’s the one who destroyed the
Reliant
.”

Kinara felt the blood drain from her face. “No, Malm was the commander.”

“No!  No, it was him!” Kyndan insisted.

“You were in command?” she whispered in Az-kye.

She read the truth instantly in Aidar’s dark gaze. Her hand went to her throat. He had captured and destroyed the
Reliant
. He had enslaved — he had
sold
— her brother. “No secrets between us, no lies. Isn’t that what you said? You sneered at Tellaran honor. Gods, is there
anything
you haven’t lied about?”

“
Cy’atta
,” he croaked, reaching for her.

She recoiled. 

“Get out,” she snarled. “Get out! And if you
ever
touch me again I swear I will kill you!”

Aidar blinked rapidly and took a step toward her. “Please—”

Kyndan threw himself forward and landed a punch across Aidar’s face. Aidar automatically fell into a fighter’s stance, his hand reaching for his sword.

Kinara moved quickly between them to shield her brother. “No!”

Kyndan was trying to push past her. 

“No,” she repeated sharply in Tellaran. “It’s not worth it. He’s leaving.” 

“Get out,” she spat. 

Ashen-faced, Aidar stepped back.

Kinara turned and hugged her brother as the door shut behind Aidar.

“It’s okay,” she murmured. “Everything’s going to be okay now.”

Kyndan’s bruised face was drawn with exhaustion.

“Sit here,” she urged, leading him to a couch. Leaving him there she went to the door and sent one of the guards to fetch Laric and the healer. 

She poured wine for Kyndan and offered him the cup.

“Thanks,” he muttered, taking a drink. “I think I need it.”

She knelt beside him, gently touching the bruise on his cheek. “I thought you were dead. He let me believe you were.”

Kyndan gave a bitter laugh. “Sometimes I wished I was. You can’t imagine what it’s been like. Being as important as an insect. They won’t even let you speak to them.” He touched his face. “Remember the hellcat I was with?”

She nodded.  “Unata.”

“Well I got this one when she stumbled and I made the mistake of catching her. Not supposed to touch them you know. They’re too good for Tellarans.”

“But what about your crew? What happened to them?”

“I’ve kept track of the others as best I could. They’re all still alive as far as I know,” he said into the cup. “I didn’t want to do it, but they were my first responsibility, Kinna. I didn’t have any choice, I surrendered.” Suddenly he looked up. “How did you get here?”

“Tedah and I—”

“
Tedah?
Tedah let you come to Az-kye space? I’ll
kill
him! Where is he?”

“I don’t know.” Her eyes stung with tears. “Baruta took him, along with the rest of my crew. Didn’t you see them?”

“They were there today? No,
she
kept me outside until the meeting was over.”

“Tedah and I got a crew together.” She shook her head. “Actually, I got the cadets together. Tedah just didn’t stop me.”

Kyndan frowned. “You came in a ship full of cadets? How did they let you out of space dock?”

She bit her lip. “I came in a stolen ship full of cadets.”

“Oh, Kinna!”

She knew that look. Halfway between wanting to upbraid her for something crazy she’d done and admiring her for doing it in the first place.

The door opened and Laric came in with the healer. Kinara stood, wiping at her face. 

“He needs medical attention. Laric, I need you to find something for him to eat. He’ll also need a bath and some clean, warm clothes.”

Laric hesitated then nodded acknowledgment and hurried away.

The healer drew herself up. “My Lady of the Az’anti—”

Kinara whirled on her. “Treat him or I will have you dusting every leaf in my garden until you die of old age and then I will leave your bones to bleach in the sun!”

The healer’s face paled. She hurried to her work but even Kyndan’s grateful smile when she had finished couldn’t unbend her. She nodded stiffly to Kinara, quickly leaving when her task was done.

When Kyndan was bathed and dressed in warm but white clothing, he sat in her apartments devouring his supper. 

The now fading bruises only emphasized how prominent the bones of his face had become. Kinara wondered when he last had a decent meal. Her crew had not been made to work, their clothing had been warm and new, and even Kinara had seen the fare that Aidar provided them.

When Kyndan heard that they’d eaten well he’d laughed, saying the Az-kye must have put it out because he knew she was going to visit them. Kinara protested that Aidar couldn’t have known. She herself hadn’t known that she was going to visit. 

Kyndan stopped eating. “It sounds like you’re defending him.”

“I’m not! But he did treat them well and that’s the truth.”

Kyndan leveled his eyes at her. “Why did he treat them so well, Kinna?”

Her cheeks went hot but she didn’t drop her gaze. “Because that was the deal we made. He promised to protect and free them and in exchange I’m — I’m —”

“You’re his Ornament.”

“No.”
It’s not like I owe him anything now.
“He wanted a wife.”

“That’s not possible,” Kyndan said flatly.

Kinara’s heart thudded.
Another lie? No, the Elder called me “Kinara of the Az’anti.” I’m clan leader. 

Aren’t I?

“They might bed Tellarans, Kinna, but they don’t
marry
them.”

She gave a short, bitter laugh. “According to them I’m not Tellaran.  I’m Az-kye.”

“Are you?” he asked quietly.

“No!”  Stiffly she began clearing the plates away. “It was part of the deal I made. I promised to be an Az-kye wife.”

He shook his head. “I’m so sorry, Kinna. Did—did he hurt you?”

She froze, her eyes on the plates in her hands. “No, he . . . he was gentle.” 

Kyndan’s expression made his disbelief evident. 

“He was,” she insisted.

Kyndan frowned. “Do you care about him?”

“No,” she spat. “Gods, I
hate
him.”

Kyndan shook his head wearily. “I’m sorry. Of course you do. I’m so tired I can’t think straight.”

She smoothed the hair out of his eyes. “I’ve had a room prepared for you. Why don’t you get some sleep? We can talk tomorrow.”

He nodded. “We’ll figure this out, Kinna. We’re together now.” He took her hand. “And I’ll get us home. I promise.” 

Kinara awakened the next morning to find the place beside her empty.

She swung her legs out of bed.
It doesn’t matter where he is as long as he isn’t here.

She had the women dress her then checked on Kyndan and decided to let him sleep until he woke on his own. Not wanting to startle him with one of the granite-faced warriors, she left one of her maids to bring him to her apartments when he awakened.

Her inquiry at Lianna’s townhouse was returned with regrets.  Baruta left yesterday, taking her daughter and her newly acquired Tellaran slaves off-world. Scowling, Kinara dismissed the maid.

The warrior who commanded her house guards came to her at midmorning but she had no idea what orders to give him. What did she know of patrols around the estate? The head of the food stocks stopped her outside the downstairs sitting room wanting to know about provisions to be ordered. Or should she economize and wait for the Az’anti grain from Az-kanzar to arrive?

Kinara sent the woman away with sharp words. Aidar could sort this stuff out when he got back.

It wasn’t her damned problem any more.   

Kyndan slept the morning away but he joined her for the midday meal. After twenty hours of sleep Kyndan looked more like himself but his face was still drawn.   

She sent the maids away and served Kyndan herself. He devoured his first serving of everything and was already onto the next. She could barely summon enough appetite for tea.

“So where is he?” Kyndan asked.

“Who?”

“You
know
who.”

“I don’t know where he is,” Kinara said shortly. “What difference does it make as long as he isn’t here?”

Kyndan shrugged. “And he’s not stupid enough to come back.”

She stabbed at a piece of tomak, the vegetable dangling from her fork. “I tracked down six of your crew this morning.”

He looked up quickly. “Are they all right?”

“As far as I know. Two are owned by clans in the north but four are here in the city.”

“Damn it, I need to figure out a way to get them home,” he said darkly.

He had stopped eating. Despite her station as
Ti’antah
she couldn’t give Kyndan a name, or his freedom.  

Imperial decree could free him but that was so rare it had only happened a handful of times in the Empire’s history. He could become Az-kye if he married into a clan with a clan leader’s permission. But very few women would have a clanless Tellaran man as mate and fewer still clan leaders would allow it, not that it mattered. Kyndan would rather be dead than Az-kye anyway.

“I have an idea,” she said with forced brightness. “Let’s go out into the city.”

He barely looked up. “What for?”

She shrugged. “Well, it beats the heck out of sitting here and we might as well see the Empress’ City while we have the chance.”

“Yeah,” he said, giving a rueful smile. “It’s not as if we’ll be here much longer, right?”

Kinara squeezed his hand. “I’ll tell Laric.”

Kyndan wasn’t happy about the crowd of Az-kye who would be accompanying them and he eyed her warriors with ill-concealed scorn. She couldn’t risk Kyndan getting into any trouble in the city and she knew he’d take on anyone who he thought threatened her. They’d both be a lot safer with her warriors on hand to deal with any problems.

She ordered the guards to keep their distance as she and Kyndan walked through the streets of the Empress’ City. Kyndan stayed at her side but Kinara kept his hands full so that it would at least appear as if he had some reason to be next to her.

Kinara and her group walked from the Az’anti house all the way to the temple district but noticing Kyndan’s fatigue Kinara stopped for refreshments near the Temple of Lashima.

Kinara selected a shaded spot under the flowering baskina trees next to the temple before sending Laric to one of the nearby taverns.

A Lady of the Az’anti wouldn’t enter such an establishment herself. The little tavern-keeper that Laric summoned obligingly brought over sweets along with the drinks and cushions for her comfort, for a steep service charge. 

Laric paid the man and Kinara took the drink he offered. Sipping it she found it not much different from the shooting stars that she had enjoyed back on Rusco. 

“It’s too bad that they don’t acknowledge Tellarans.” Kyndan gestured over to a corded off area where two young men wrestled. “I could take that guy without breaking a sweat.”

Kinara, recognizing it as
ky’shinka
, an Az-kye sport more for wagering than actual athletic value, smiled. She waved one of her guards, Reth, forward and quickly gave him instructions.

Kyndan looked at her questioningly. She grinned and handed him several coins. “I told him I’m sending you to place some bets for me.”

Kyndan grinned back and, money in hand, followed the guard over.

Very alone, despite her guards and maids, Kinara let her smile fade. 

Where were they now? Tedah and her other friends? Were they afraid? Hurt? And what of Nisara? Ashamed to be seen sitting at Dael’s feet, Nisara was worse off now than any Ornament in the back streets of Tellar’s marketplace.

Did any of them think she had forgotten them?

Her jaw hardened.
I will find you. I will get you—all of you—home. I will make good on the promises
he
broke.

How could I have ever trusted him?

Her mouth tightened.

Where had he gone anyway?

For all that vaunted warrior courage, Aidar didn’t even have the guts to face her, to own up to what he’d done.  

I loved him.

Her eyes pricked with tears and she rubbed at them impatiently. Kyndan — all of them — needed her to be strong now. The task of finding them all, her crew and Kyndan’s, of getting everyone back to Tellaran space might take years.