Starting Over (Treading Water Trilogy) (20 page)

“So you’ve got it bad for both of them, huh?”

“It’s starting to seem that way.”

“Is that a good idea so soon after rehab?”

“Probably not, but what am I supposed to do? She’s the greatest kid, and they’re here all alone. No family nearby.”

“Why don’t you bring them to Easter?”

“I don’t know. The O’Malleys might be too overwhelming for Daphne. She’s kind of a loner.”

“We’d behave. Ask her.”

“We’ll see.”

Chapter 18, Day 70

“Did you have fun?” Brandon asked when Mike’s uncharacteristic quiet started to get to him on the way home.

“Oh yeah, a lot of fun.”

“Then why so quiet?”

“I was just thinking that they’re so lucky to always have someone to play with.”

“That’s true, but from what I hear, they always have someone to fight with, too.”

“Why aren’t you close to them?” She looked over at him. “The kids, I mean.”

Once again she floored him. “I, uh, well… That’s kind of a long story, but I’m working on it. Maybe you can help me with that.”

“Sure. I’ll think about it.”

He laughed at her serious tone. “Thanks.”

They arrived at the apartment building, and after Brandon returned Mike’s booster seat to Daphne’s car, he followed her upstairs.

“Mom!” she yelled, bursting through the door. “I’m home!”

“Hi, Pooh.”

Brandon caught the flash of relief that crossed Daphne’s face when they walked in.

“Hey, what happened to your head?” Daphne asked her daughter.

Brandon winced. He should’ve known she’d zero right in on the bump.

“Oh, it’s nothing. Josh and I bumped heads when we were reaching for the same toy.”

Daphne kissed the bump. “Did you have fun?”

“It was awesome! They have the coolest house. It looks just like Cinderella’s castle.”

Daphne smiled. “I’m glad you had a good time. Now go get washed up for dinner.”

“Okay,” Mike said, but she rushed over to hug Brandon first. “Thanks for taking me.”

“It was my pleasure.”

“Did she cry?” Daphne asked after Mike left the room.

“Like crazy.”

“Freaked you out, did it?”

“Just a bit.”

Daphne laughed. “Kids are made of super elastic bubble plastic. Didn’t you know that?”

“Hell, no,” he said with a scowl, playing along with her. “You could’ve told me that before.”

“It’s more fun to imagine you all frazzled.”

He smiled, enjoying a rare glimpse at her playful side. “I’m glad I’m available to entertain you.”

Her expression turned serious, and she studied him for a long moment.

Squirming under her scrutiny, he said, “What?”

“You’re very…” She looked away, embarrassed.

He closed the distance between them. “I’m very what?”

She turned her gaze up to meet his. “Handsome,” she whispered.

He seized the moment with a kiss that turned hot so fast, it left him light-headed.

“Don’t,” she said a minute later when she pulled back from him. “Mike…”

“What time does she go to bed?”

“She’s asleep by nine thirty.”

“I’ll be back.” He waited for her to object, but she didn’t.

Brandon forced himself to wait until nine forty-five. He’d gotten in a few hours of work in Mrs.
Oczkowski’s
apartment, eaten a sandwich for dinner, and at nine o’clock, he took a shower and shaved. He would’ve loved a drink to take the edge off his nerves. Instead, he flipped on an early season Red Sox game and sat down to wait.

His heart was in his throat by the time he walked upstairs and knocked softly. He wondered if she would let him kiss her again, or if the distrust and suspicion that seemed to be so much a part of who she was would’ve returned in the hours they’d spent apart.

She opened the door, wearing a pale blue tank top and the drool-inducing black yoga pants.

Their eyes met in the instant before they both took a step forward.

Brandon lifted her to him, and their lips met with frantic urgency. He kicked the door shut behind him and carried her to the sofa where they landed without breaking the kiss. When he felt her fingers weave into his hair to tug him closer, it was all he could do not to groan out loud. So this was what he’d been missing during all the years he spent pining for a woman he couldn’t have, not to mention the years he spent with a woman he didn’t want—not like this anyway.

He slid his hand under her shirt and cupped her breast.

She gasped and arched into him. “Brandon,” she whispered against his ear.

He ran his thumb over her nipple, and it hardened instantly.

She whimpered and pulled him close enough to kiss again.

This time, though, he went easy, running his tongue over her lip with a slow patience that made her moan. He gave her ear the same attention as he tried to catch his breath from that first, explosive burst of passion. If he didn’t slow things down, this was going to get out of hand. Fast.

She wasn’t cooperating with the slow-it-down plan, however. Her hands were all over him. He shivered when she dragged her fingernail along his spine and then pushed a hand into the back of his jeans.

“Brandon, take me to bed,” she whispered.

He was thinking of his recovery and all the warnings about too much too soon when he said, “I can’t.”

She moved her hand around to the front of his jeans and pushed it against his rigid length. “It seems to me like you can.”

Reaching down to stop her while he still could, he withdrew her hand, brought it up to his mouth, and left a lingering kiss on her palm. “I’m not looking for a one-time thing.”

“I might be up for twice.”

He laughed. “You’re not taking me seriously.”

“I haven’t had sex in five years. Believe me, I’m taking you
very
seriously.”

“Five
years
?”

She rolled his earlobe between her teeth. “Five years, Brandon,” she whispered.

“You’re officially killing me. I’m trying to be a good guy here.”

“You
are
a good guy. That’s why I want you in my bed.” She kissed him again and pulled out all the stops to entice him.

Telling himself he was an idiot to resist her, he was on the verge of giving in when Mike called for her mother. He lifted his arm to free Daphne to go to her.

Brandon sat up, ran a hand through his hair, and tried to catch his breath. He’d never been more turned on in his life.

Daphne came back a few minutes later. Her cheeks were flushed, her lips swollen from kissing him. “She knows you’re here. Do you mind going in to see her?”

“Of course not.” Brandon got up to follow her down the hallway. A nightlight on Mike’s bedside table cast a faint glow upon the room. As he sat on the bed, he was touched to see Brandon the Bear tucked in next to her. “Hey, what’re you doing awake?”

Daphne sat on the other side.

“I had a bad dream,” Mike said, her lip quivering.

“Want to tell me about it?” Brandon asked.

She shook her head. “Will you stay here with me until I fall asleep?”

Brandon looked over at Daphne.

She nodded.

“Sure.” Brandon stretched out next to Mike while Daphne did the same on her side of the bed.

Mike sighed and closed her eyes. “Thanks.”

Brandon kissed her cheek.

Daphne put her arm around Mike and reached for Brandon’s hand.

As Daphne’s fingers linked with his, he was filled with contentment. He drifted off to sleep next to them, saying a silent prayer of thanks to whatever higher power had brought them into his life.

Chapter 19, Day 71

The Mickey Mouse clock on the bedside table told Brandon it was just after four. Mike was using him as a pillow. Daphne had her arm around both of them, and a leg tossed over him. Brandon lay perfectly still to listen to the soft cadence of their breathing. The nightlight allowed him to watch them sleep, and the intimacy of it was almost spiritual.

When he realized he wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep, he moved slowly to extricate himself. He eased Mike’s head back onto her pillow, brushed her hair off her face, and left a light kiss on her forehead.

When he sat up, Daphne’s eyes opened.

“Did you sleep at all?” she whispered.

“Yeah, but I’m awake, so I’m going to go.” He leaned over to kiss her.

“Thanks for this,” she said with a glance at Mike.

How could he tell her that nothing had ever given him more pleasure than sleeping with the two of them snuggled around him? “Sure. I’ll see you later?”

She nodded but couldn’t seem to look away from him.

What passed between them in that endless second was the understanding that this could be the start of something important—for all of them.

He went around to her side of the bed to kiss her again. When her hand curled around the back of his neck, he lingered longer than he’d planned to.

“Go back to sleep for a while,” he whispered with one last kiss.

Brandon’s thoughts were full of Daphne on his early morning run. He could remember feeling this way only once before, and he’d already had more with Daphne than he’d ever had with Sarah. This had the potential to be a healthy relationship, which was a novel idea to him. He needed to take it slow and not get ahead of himself, though. No matter how strong his feelings were for Daphne and Mike, his recovery had to come first right now.

At that morning’s AA meeting, Brandon raised his hand when the leader asked who wanted to start the discussion.

“I’m Brandon, and I’m an alcoholic.”

“Hi, Brandon,” the group replied.

“I’ve been sober for seventy-one days, and so far I think I’m doing pretty well. I still get the urge for a drink, but I’m getting better at controlling those urges. I’ve also been trying to make my amends to the people I hurt when I was drinking.”

The others nodded with approval.

“When I was in rehab and first learning about the program, the part I had the biggest problem with was the spiritual aspect. Since I’ve been out, though, I’ve begun to experience some of the blessings that come from living a sober life.” Brandon took a sip of his coffee before he continued. “One of those blessings is an adorable five-year-old girl who’s come into my life and shown me what it’s like to love someone so much I’d do anything for her. I’m also becoming involved with her mother. I know this isn’t the ideal time for me to be starting new relationships, but I’ve decided that as long as I stay focused on my recovery, there may be room in my life for other things, too. Well, that’s what I wanted to say. Thank you.”

“Thank you, Brandon.”

After the meeting, Brandon walked with Joe to the coffee shop where they were now daily regulars.

“So the girl you mentioned at the meeting is the one who lives in the apartments where you’re working, right?” Joe asked.

“That’s right. Her name is Mike, which is short for Michaela, and she has me wrapped firmly around her little finger.”

Joe grinned. “I have three daughters. I feel the pain, believe me. What’s the story with her mother? What’s her name?”

“Daphne,” Brandon said with a smile. “She’s…” He found himself at a loss for words. “She’s very courageous. She’s raising Mike completely on her own, but she doesn’t ever seem overwhelmed by the responsibility the way most people would be. And she’s stunning. I mean drop-dead gorgeous.”

“You seem smitten.”

“They’re becoming very important to me.”

“I was glad to hear you say at the meeting that you’re keeping your recovery front and center in your life. But I wouldn’t be doing my job as your sponsor if I didn’t caution you to be vigilant. You’re feeling stronger than you have in years—physically and emotionally—which is a big accomplishment. However, if this relationship doesn’t work out, you could be seriously jeopardizing all your hard work. Many a relapse is caused by disappointment.”

“I know. Believe me, I wish it’d happened a year from now when I’d be better equipped to handle it. But this could be my first opportunity for a real relationship with a woman. I can’t miss out on it just because the timing isn’t ideal.”

“Be careful, Brandon. Not just for your sake but for theirs, too. The more they come to care for you and depend upon you the greater the potential becomes for you to disappoint them should you suffer a relapse.”

Joe’s words sent a jolt of fear through Brandon. “I won’t let that happen.”

When he returned to Chatham, Brandon stopped at his house to pick up his mail, which included a letter from Aidan’s ex-girlfriend, Clare.

Dear Brandon,