Storky

Read Storky Online

Authors: D. L. Garfinkle

Table of Contents
 
High school sucks!
I hate school. Duke better be right about high school not being the best time of my life. If it is, then life sucks. At lunch today, I went to the bathroom and Stretch Barron stood inside the doorway totally blocking me. His stupid hairy basketball friends leaned on the dirty walls behind him, passing a big thermos around. I bet anything there was booze in there. He goes, “Seniors only, kid.”
I had to walk all the way to the other side of school. I couldn’t go to the bathroom near the admin building, since that’s where Joey Hawkins got beat up last week and some sophomore got dunked headfirst in the toilet.
I finally made it to a bathroom I could enter without fearing for my life. Then some guy I don’t know at all said, “Hey, Storky” on his way out. And just as I got some relief, right at eye level someone had written, “Amanda Pomerantz is a total tease.” You really don’t want to be looking at graffiti about your sister while you’re trying to take a whiz.
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Registered Offices: Penguin Books Ltd, 80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL, England
First published in the United States of America by G. P. Putnam’s Sons,
a division of Penguin Young Readers Group, 2005
Published by Speak, an imprint of Penguin Group (USA) Inc., 2007
Copyright © Debra Garfinkle, 2005
eISBN : 978-1-440-68430-2

http://us.penguingroup.com

Dedicated to Jeff,
the best thing that ever happened to me.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
I’m grateful for my wonderful friends and family, especially Jeffrey Garfinkle; Sarah, Mark, and Aaron Garfinkle, my greatest achievements; Judy Green; April and Jessie Holland; Lane Klein and our book club; Micaela Alas-San Miguel; and Jeanne Taber.
Thank you to the writers I’ve met on the Net and in the flesh, who’ve been shockingly kind and helpful; my wise and fun critique group; James Meyers, my Dr. Berm, who made me revise until it hurt; and Bob Shacochis, Peggy Lang, the San Diego Book Awards Association, John H. Ritter, and Alyssa Eisner, for all their encouragement.
This book would not exist without three amazing people: Judy Reeves, who taught me how to write; Laura Rennert, who took a big dumb chance on me; and John Rudolph, whose picture is in the dictionary under
dream editor
.
And to anyone not at the A-list table in the crapeteria: You’re A-list in my book!
Sunday, August 29
HOPES FOR HIGH SCHOOL
1. Gina confesses she’s madly in love with me.
2. Dad teaches me to drive and buys me a Land Rover.
3. I’m the first freshman ever voted homecoming king.
 
REALISTIC HOPES FOR HIGH SCHOOL
1. Gina doesn’t totally blow me off.
2. Dad lets me sit in the front seat of his car.
3. I don’t get thrown into a Dumpster.
Monday, August 30
High school sucks rocks.
4 people at 4 separate times called me Storky today. I was hoping to lose that lame nickname. How hard is it to say Michael or Mike? It’s all my fault, for being such a stork. If I looked up the word
storky
in the dictionary, I’d probably see my picture. I’m way too tall for my weight and way too thin for my height. Not to mention the bird legs and wiry hair.
Soon people won’t even know my real name. They’ll probably still be calling me Storky at our 20-year reunion. I’ll be in an old-age home and the nurses will call me Storky. I can just see it on my grave:
 

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