Story of Us trilogy 01: TouchStone for Play (47 page)

“I love you Beth, isn’t that enough?”

“No. Accept your fate.” I begin to rock my
body back and forth whilst fisting his rigid cock, knowing he desperately wants
to be inside me.

“Stop! Beth, I can’t.”

“Then use the safe word. Make me stop.” I
order him. “You have to say the words Ayden, not for me, but for you.” I lean
into him and whisper in his ear. “Give it up for
me
baby.” Those words
take him to breaking point.

He calls out. “Yes, yes I submit. Everything
I am, you have me. I Belong To You.” Between gritted teeth he commands. “Now,
fucking ride me!”

It’s what we both need to hear and, with
those words echoing in my ears, I sit onto him, taking him deep inside,
gripping his legs until it’s almost painful; clinching and crushing him
internally.

He growls, “Ride me.”

I respond, picking up speed, moving to a
turbulent rhythm, swerving and rocking until the heat in my groin reaches
boiling point.

“I’m going to come so hard,” he exclaims,
arching his back off the chair. “You’re so fucking hot you’re killing me Beth.”

His ejaculation, ripples through me and
triggers a chain reaction, I come and contract around him and he pumps out into
me again, jerking and groaning into the darkness.

I wait until he stills and rest my head on
his shoulder; his skin is clammy and glazed with sweat, but it doesn’t matter,
he’s still the sexiest guy in the known universe. I ease off him and on
unsteady legs and edge behind him to untie his hands. When I release him, I see
there are red rings cut into is skin. I kiss the red areas and he rests each
hand against my face.

I straddle him, preparing to say ... what?
‘I’m sorry I hurt you.’ Tears sting my eyes.

He raises my face to his. “You didn’t hurt
me Beth. You’ve saved me on so many levels. I adore you.” He plants a soft kiss
on my lips and strokes my hair with such veneration I think I may weep. “Undo
the belt so I can stretch out my legs.”

I do so immediately, rubbing his ankles,
fearing they too will be marked and sore.

Looking troubled, he takes the belt from
me. “What have I done to my little genie?”

I smile adoringly and confess, “You’ve set
her free,” and fall into his arms.

***

It’s three in the morning when I wake,
with the sound of Ayden’s words of submission still ringing in my ears. He’s
not beside me again and, I realise it’s his voice I can hear. The only
difference is: he’s not submitting now.

I trot into the bathroom and glance at
myself. I’m weary from lack of sleep but behind my fluttering eye-lids there’s
a brightness that wasn’t there a fortnight ago: my eyes are glistening with
love. I tip-toe into the lounge and the volume increases.

“It’s three in the morning … I’ve told you
not to call me. It’s over. I didn’t say that, I didn’t promise you anything …
you need to move on. No, you can’t come round, I’m out of the country. It’s
none of your fucking business who I’m with … look it’s late …”

The floorboard creaks beneath my feet,
making me grimace: I’ve been found out. “Ayden? Is everything ok?” I call out,
seeming as if ‘ve just woken.

“Go back to bed Elise. I’ve nothing more
to say to you. Don’t call me again. Goodnight.”

His impressive silhouette comes over to
me, any trace of harshness gone. “Hey sleepy head, what are you doing up?”

“I woke and wondered where you were, is
everything alright? You were shouting?”

“Sure, it’s business as usual in Hong
Kong. You know? The time difference?” He turns me around into the opposite
direction.

“Oh yes, I forgot.”

Elise?

“Let’s get you back into bed.” He slips
his arm under my naked bottom, picks me up off my feet and carries me back to
bed as if I weigh nothing at all.

The soft sheets are cold beneath me. Nuzzling
into him, I feel how cold his body is and I wrap myself across him, sharing
some of my warmth. “You must have been there for ages, you’re so cold.” I begin
rubbing his left arm with my hand.

“I’m warming up, see.” He slides my hand
onto his growing erection. “… and getting warmer by the minute.”

“Mmm… and so you are.” I smile into his
chest and rub my hand up and down the hardening shaft.

      He gives me back my hand. “I’m sorry
I woke you. Let me give you something to help you sleep. Open your legs.” I
take his left hand and place it between my legs.

“You feel so moist.”

I roll onto my back, allowing him to feel
his way along soft flesh before sliding into me. His breathing hitches and so
does mine.

“You’re warm.” He moves his fingers in and
out to a rhythm that I synchronise with my rocking hips. He bends his fingers
ever so slightly and finds that sensitive spot inside me: it feels divine.

“For someone who claims to have little
experience of pleasuring women, you’re a very fast learner.” I state breathless
and needy.

“Long flight. Lots of research.”

“Thank God for the Internet.” Is my only
response, even though I don’t believe a word of it.

“Besides, you’re a very responsive woman.
Your body speaks to me.”

I bet it does!

“And what is it saying to you now?” I
pant.

He nestles his mouth against my left ear.
“It’s saying make me come Ayden.” He’s not wrong.

“Oh really?” I gasp and feel him slow
slightly.

“I’m going to miss this. Just the thought
of it will have me reaching for my cock.”

Is he purposely talking dirty, because his
words are bringing me closer and closer to my climax.

“Why don’t you come with me to Hong Kong?
We’ll see the sights, take a cruise, sip cocktails at the Ritz Carlton and
watch the sun go down. What do you say?”

The prospect of all that and the fact I’m
a couple of strokes away from an orgasm make it almost impossible to say no,
but I have to. My voice is hoarse and there’s no way of concealing my arousal.
“I can’t.”

He intensifies his penetration.

I’m starting to arch my back and groaning.
“You shouldn’t mix business with pleasure or the lines will become … blurred.”
I just about get the words out.

“Oh I’m way passed that.” The palm of his
right hand begins to skim my stomach, and I know what he’s doing; he’s using
both
hands to pleasure me. In the darkness, his face is just an outline; strong jaw,
cheek bones carved out of marble, fierce eyes. A a vision of masculine beauty.

“I want you to tell me something Beth.”

“Anything, just let me come.”

“Not yet, tell me what you want, what I
can give you. No holds barred, anything money can buy, whatever you’ve dreamed
of. Tell me.”

“Only you Ayden. Let me come.” I’m so
close.

“No, you already have me. What can I give
you?”

In my rapturous state, I begin to speak
but hold back, focusing on my approaching orgasm. I reach out to his face and
try to pull his mouth to mine, but he will have none of it.

“Tell me.”

“A … a…”

“Yes…”

“A …” My insides explode and I lurch into
his hands. “A … baby.” I come with such force, it leaves me trembling and
gasping.

He’s pulling out of me but still staring
into my face: he is open mouthed and clearly shocked. “Did you say what I think
you said?”

Dry mouthed I answer, “Yes, that’s the
only thing I want from you, after yourself. I want you to be the father of my
children.”

He falls onto his back, hands in his hair,
gazing up at the ceiling. “I can’t do that Beth.”

After several minutes of post orgasmic
contemplation, I turn on my side to face him, “Can’t or won’t?”

“Both.”

“Can’t because of sperm count or won’t
because ...”

He’s shaking his head from side to side.
“I’m not father material Beth, believe me.”

I rest my right hand on his heart. “Don’t
say that. You would be a wonderful father, any child would be so lucky to have
you.”

“You’re right about so many things Beth,
but you’re wrong about this. Like I said last night, I’m not
that
guy.”
He can barely look at me and it’s painful to see him despairing over a single
word.

I feel muscles settling beneath my navel;
somewhere inside there’s a part of me breaking into tiny little pieces. “You
are
that
guy Ayden, you just don’t know it yet. I’m not talking about
tomorrow, next week or next year: just one day, that’s all.”

I fall back onto the mattress. What
possessed me to scare him like that?

He rolls over, propping his head on his
right palm. “Why is it you always find my Achilles heel? You push me to my
limit with everything.”

What a revealing thing to say.

My hand finds its way to his face.
“Because I see you for the man you are and your potential for being so much
more. You put it so beautifully yesterday.” I blink away a tear. “We’re not
perfect, but we’re perfect for each other. Is it so wrong to want a new life to
come out of that perfection  -  the best of both of us?”

In an impulsive act of raw passion, he
moulds his lips to mine and kisses me deeply, his tongue is licking and tasting
me in a kind of frenzied eruption of pent up emotion: where is this coming
from?

“I don’t think I could bear to share you,
knowing someone else was inside you.”

I try to speak, “But ... it would be you,
for nine whole months Ayden.”

It’s as if a light goes on somewhere in
his fevered brain. He seems a little less fraught and slightly more sedate.

“Anyway, that’s what you get for asking me
what I want, ten seconds away from an orgasm. Ask me what I want tomorrow when
my feet are on the ground, and you might get a more favourable answer.”

“I will.” The sparkle returns to his eyes
and I see the outline of a genial smile.

I pull his head into my neck and cuddle
him like a small child needing my undivided attention and he responds, throwing
his left leg over me until we are squashed together like two peas in a pod.

I stroke his hair softly. “Go to sleep,
baby.”

I feel his smile on my neck. “I love you.”

“I love you more.”

I concentrate on slowing my breathing and
turn my head away from him, feeling salt water building in my eyes, bubbling
over onto the pillow in a silent trickle. Even with my feet firmly on the
ground, chances are, I would say exactly the same thing: a baby
is
all I
want, after him, naturally.

Having tested his BMW’s capacity for speed
and endurance, Dan is about to give the chasse a road test; with time on his
hands before his date with destiny, he’s clearing away the numerous piles of
newspapers and magazines he has accumulated over the years, in his hunt for
Beth
Parker. He’s flinging pile upon pile of yellowing paper onto the back seats,
having already filled the boot to capacity. The aging car looks as if it’s been
parked on an incline.

No-one pays him any attention, he’s a
solitary figure in the darkness clearing his shit, maybe he’s moving out. Who
know? Who cares? It’s Friday night, everyone else has something better to do.

When he returns to his apartment, it
appears to have undergone a change for the better; he has room to move around,
to cross from one side to the other without stumbling over yesterday’s news.
Best of all, he can stroll over to his cork noticeboard and speak with his girl
unhampered by stray inserts and junk mail. It’s just the two of them, and he
plans to keep it that way.

“I visited your apartment tonight princess
and enjoyed every minute of it. You weren’t there but soon we’ll be spending a
lot of
quality
time together. You’ll see.”

He pulls out a cigarette and lights it
leisurely, exhaling the smoke and watching it linger over her already fading
image. With his free hand, he traces the outline of his erection through his
jeans. “I hope Stone is treating you right, ‘cause if he isn’t, he’ll have me
to answer to. Fairs, fair, can’t expect him to keep his hands off a pretty
little thing like you.” He pulls a speck of tobacco from his tongue. “I expect
he’s broken you in good and proper, got you used to feeling something hard
inside you.” He’s laughing and smoking at the same time, like a man intoxicated
by his own grotesque fantasies. “We both remember how that feels, don’t we
princess?” His hand never leaves his crutch, his eyes flicker from picture to
picture.  “Not long now …”

For
some reason I wake, needing to visit the
bathroom but take the opportunity to observe Ayden while he sleeps peacefully
beside me. That’s surprising considering my revelation. Never has a man looked
more captivating. I watch his finely honed chest rise and fall, the air leaves
his mouth in whisper soft breaths and the skin around his eyelashes ripples
slightly as he dreams. The pouting precision of his lips draws my eye; as if
carved out of stone, his top lip forms that flawless V. I touch my mouth,
remembering the taste of perfection.

His left hand rests on the pillow by his
head, powerful but soft to the touch; the thick band of platinum on his middle
finger, tempting me to weave my own between his to reaffirm our connection. How
could he be so adamant about his lack of parenting skills after everything he
has done for me: he has such a good heart.

I edge silently into the bathroom and
relieve myself. Shrugging on my bathrobe, I leave and tiptoe out onto the
terrace. The sun rises at 7.40 and I want to catch it as it welcomes a new day,
a day that promises to be even better than yesterday, if that’s possible.

The tea-lights have long since died but
their fragrance lingers; the scent of jasmine pervades the open space and
evokes memories of the night before: great food, great conversation and the
greatest lover. What did I do to deserve all this?

      The watery heat from the sun filters
through the clouds, chasing away cool night air, casting a hazy film over the
landscape: it’s beautiful. From nowhere Ayden appears behind me, dressed in his
bathrobe.

“Hey, what are you doing out here, you’ll
catch cold.” He opens up his bathrobe and wraps it around me, folding my back
into his naked body. “Couldn’t you sleep?”

“I woke up to go to the toilet but found
myself out here watching the sun rise.”

“Then we’ll watch it together.”

He kisses my neck and I lean back into
him, my head resting just under his chin. There we stand cocooned in fluffy
white robes, silently watching the shadows form on the tiled rooftops.

“This whole trip has been like a dream
Ayden, you’ve made it very special. Thank you.” I take hold of his fists either
side of my collar bone where he grips onto his bathrobe. “I’ve downloaded the
photographs, you should take a look.”

“I intend to, there are a couple I’m
especially looking forward to seeing.”

I smile, recalling the one of me standing
half naked in the bedroom and any one of a hundred or more he has taken of me.
But, I’m haunted by a single sentence,
‘untie me Beth.’

“You’d tell me if you felt uncomfortable
about anything I’ve done, wouldn’t you?” I ask.

“You’d be the first to know.” As if he is
reading my thoughts he continues. “Last night, the submission thing, it started
out as fun but giving up control, that wasn’t easy for me. You were right
though, I needed to say the words out loud; accepting that we are bound to each
other makes things easier.” He kisses my hair.  “You’ve taught me that letting
go isn’t a sign of weakness: it’s all about trust, and that’s the foundation of
our love. It’s taken me longer than you to figure it out.  I get it now.”

“Good, I don’t want you to feel the way
you did in L.A. so … vulnerable.” I pull his hand to my mouth. “It’s the intimacy
of it all that makes it so special, we don’t have to give it a name. I’ll
always try to give you what you need to keep you strong, you know that?” I
plant a soft kiss on his knuckles. “For all my games, I’m yours whichever way.”
I lean onto his warm hand and feel the heat of it on my cheek.

      Gentle laughter rumbles through his
chest and vibrates through my spine. “Baby, I was all yours last night.” He
whispers into my ear. “I would give the whole fucking lot up for you. You know
that, right?”

“I do now.”

“So, don’t worry. I’m good.” I feel his
warm breath on my hair before his lips nibble my ear. “Anyway, all that’s water
under the bridge.” He tightens his grip around me.

“I’m glad, being with you has made me
realise just how lonely I was. I wasn’t living. I was existing, getting through
each day just waiting, waiting for you to find me.”

“Thank you for waiting.”

I start to laugh quietly.

“What’s funny?”

“You thanking me, shouldn’t it be the
other way around?”

“That’s where you’ve got it all wrong
Beth. I didn’t know it at the time, but I was opening so many doors only to
find they were leading me nowhere, when all the time I was searching for you.
If you hadn’t waited for me, then I would have spent my life never experiencing
this.” He nuzzles into my hair and breaths in my perfume. “And what a fucking
tragedy that would have been.”

I smile with a devious thought. “Good
metaphor. How many
doors
did you open exactly?”

“Behave!” He grins.

That’s as much as he is willing to say on
the matter, and I let it drop. I turn around to face him, his firm body
radiating heat and desire, his eyes ardent and captivating. “I didn’t mean to
frighten you with the baby thing, but you made me confess. Under
normal
circumstances I would keep thoughts like that to myself.”

I witness the beginnings of a sexy grin.
“You were under ...
duress.
”

“I was under
you
, or maybe that’s
the same thing?” I mirror his salacious smile and feel my mouth twitching as a
result.

“There’s an idea …” Through my towelling
robe I feel a frisky penis greeting the new day. “Now look what you’ve done.”

He arches himself into me and I tip back
my head in search of his lips. I can’t conceive of a day when I will stop
wanting this man. Even in the dimmest of light, his eyes enchant me: I can’t
pull away. I’ll never pull away.

“You’re insatiable.”

“I’m yours,” he confesses.

He releases my body; his arms rest by his
side and the front of his robe remains open. He’s standing there, exposed.
“We’d better go inside. It’s too cold out here for me.”

Instinctively, we both look down, to check
for adverse effects. From where I’m standing his impressive erection looks
impervious to the drop in temperature. I start to giggle and wrap his robe
around him. The last thing I want is to affect his performance capability.

“That’s my second favourite sound,” he
smirks. We can both guess his number one. He takes my hand and leads me inside.
“Come, I need to make love to you.”

***

Our sumptuous bedroom is still in partial
darkness; a small gap in the damask curtains provides just enough light to make
out features but touch and taste are the primary senses being used for
exploration. There’s no denying his amorous intentions as I’m steadily reversed
backward towards the bed, but there’s something eating at my conscience: my
confession. I have to tell him the truth about me, even though I know by doing
so I’m risking everything.

“Ayden.” I take hold of his face and hold
him a couple of inches from mine, my neck still tingling from his moist
caresses but, for me to say what I must, I will need all my faculties. “There’s
something I want to tell you.”

He tries to remove my hands and inches in
to continue devouring my supple flesh.

“No, I mean it. Listen. What would it take
for you to stop loving me, to stop wanting me like this?”

He looks squarely at me, unable to
comprehend my words. “Are you serious?”

I wish I wasn’t but I am, totally. “Yes.”

“You ask me that now?”

“Yes.” My earnest expression settles him.

“Well, I don’t know.” He blows out a
stream of hot hair. “If you were unfaithful, which you’re not. If you tried to
interfere with my business, which you’re not. What else is there?” He’s at a
loss.

“What if there was something in my past
which was really bad and you found out. Would you still love me then?” I try to
avoid being overly dramatic, but I’m failing miserably.

“Yes, I would still love you then.” He
tips his head to the right and begins making light of my conversation. “Why,
what did you do? Rob a bank, cheat in an exam?” He laughs to himself and stops
dead. “There is one other thing ...”

 I nod yes, rapt.

“I suppose if you were a guy and you’d had
a sex change, I might find that a little ... disconcerting.”

“Oh, Ayden, it’s nothing like that.” I’m
trying to be serious and all he can do is attach himself to my right earlobe. I
push him away and rest my palms against his chest like a mime artist traversing
a sheet of glass.

“Ok. What’s got you so spooked?”

Now I have his undivided attention the
room starts to fold in on me, becoming a little claustrophobic: warm skin,
intense scrutiny, heart beats. I feel cornered. I begin: “Remember when I told
you about being attacked at university, I didn’t explain fully what happened
and ...”

“… You don’t have to.”

“Yes I do,” I say, my voice rasping with
grit and determination. I pull the cord tighter on my bathrobe, drawing it in
and around my body. I prefer to wear it this way, like an invisibility cloak; something
to hide behind.

He touches my troubled face and urges me
to continue, sitting me beside him on the bed, his arm around my shoulder. He
waits.

“This isn’t easy for me Ayden, but I don’t
want there to be any secrets between us, for you to be under any illusions
about me. I’ve been afraid to tell you because I feared it would change the way
you feel about me.”

He’s shaking his head. “Nothing you say
could do that, Beth.” He strokes my cheek with the back of his hand, not daring
to actually caress it, offering only reassurance.

“Ok, then I’ll give you the full story,
instead of the edited highlights.” I try to make light of it but, it’s my
nerves, they’re jangling and making me say the silliest things; anything to
fill the frigid air that is beginning to envelope me.

               “Don’t make light of it. It
takes a lot to bare your soul. I should know. Now, take a big breath and tell
me what happened and then you’ll be rid of it. And, if you don’t want to, we’ll
never speak of it again.”

Feeling my hand warming in his I prepare
to risk everything. “It was a Sunday night and a whole bunch of us headed out
to the University Bar, it was an 80’s theme night and I wasn’t going to go
because I had a 9am lecture but Charlie persuaded me. I was tired and decided
to leave early.”

“On your own?”

The intensity of his stare tells me he
knows what’s coming. “Yes, on my own. It seemed like a good idea at the time.”
I pause, reminded of my foolishness.

“I caught a bus and then walked the rest
of the way and had to cross a car park to get to our apartment but, out of
nowhere, a car swerved in front of me blocking my way. These three guys got
out.” Ayden’s eyes are on stalks.

“Well … they grabbed me and two of them
held my arms and the one giving out the orders, he was this broad guy, over six
foot. He put his hand over my mouth so I couldn’t scream.” My focus settles on
a vacant spot somewhere by the window as my mind replays the horrific scene. Like
I always do, I pretend it’s a scene in a film. I turn to him. “He called me
Princess and kept making these lurid suggestions about what I secretly wanted
to do to him - a real psycho.”

Sensing what’s coming next, Ayden begins
stroking my hair as if I’m a forlorn child or a Persian cat. I feel loved.

“He stunk of beer, I could smell it on his
breath.  I tried to fight but they held onto my arms and I couldn’t break free.
I was terrified.”

“I bet.”

“He said he had something for me and
that’s when …” I swallow back bile. “That’s when I felt the bottle ...”

Ayden’s hand stills momentarily, then
finds its way from my hair to my shoulder; he pulls me into his chest and wraps
me in his arms, cocooning me in love. But I’ve not finished. There’s more. It
gets worse.

“I thought he was going to kill me. Then a
light came on and an old guy came out whistling his dog, taking it for a walk
or something, I’m not sure. In the light, I got a good look at the guy’s face;
he was enjoying hurting me, I mean really getting off on it.”

“The two guys holding my arms got scared
and wanted to release me but he didn’t want to let me go. He pressed his face
against mine, dragged his hand across my face and licked my cheek and said … “This
isn’t over Princess, we’ll finish this another time.” I remember the words
exactly because they were all I could hear for the next month or so.”

“Beth, look at me.” I meet his tender
eyes. “It’s all water under the bridge, remember. We’ve both had our share of
experiences, good and bad.”

I turn my head and look into his
sympathetic face; in the half-light, I see his eyes glossy and kind. That look
is more than I could have hoped for, more than I deserve.

“I’ve not told you everything … I need to
tell you.”