Strange in Skin (15 page)

“Thanks so much, Carlin,” I mumbled to myself chuckling as I picked up my black dress coat that
my parents had bought me for church years ago that I think I had only worn a couple times. I tossed it
over my shoulder and flicked the light off as I turned to go out of the store.

During the drive down to the prison, I tossed names for myself back and forth in my head. What
sounded lawyerly? I ran through the entire alphabet sifting through names that popped into my head.
Before I knew it, I was pulling into the parking lot. I parked the car and turned off the engine. I
crossed my hands in front of my lap and took a deep breath and exhaled loudly. My heart was
thumping away uncontrollably. I closed my eyes for a moment and concentrated at the task at hand.
Emry. Then I opened them, pressed my lips together in the rearview mirror, checked my teeth and
exited the vehicle.

Here we go
, I thought to myself.
Amelia Roberts it is.
I repeated the name a couple of times to
myself as I walked so I wouldn’t stumble and mess it up, my black high heels clicking loud on the
cement. I walked cautiously as I wasn’t used to this kind of shoe, but I knew I had to play the part and
walk in quick, long strides as I imagined a high-class attorney would.

Once inside the main entrance of the prison, my eyes immediately met with the woman positioned
behind the plastic screen at the front desk. I recognized her as the same one that had been there when I
had first stepped into this place to pass out my father’s brochures. What was her name again? I
searched my memory for the answer. I believe Buck had called her Tiff. I walked toward her and
tried to keep my head held high, my shoulders back. Professional, I reminded myself.

“Can I help you?” she asked, sounding more annoyed than desiring to be helpful.
“I’m here to see a client of mine.” I tried to steady my voice as the nerves were getting the best of
me. My stomach felt instantly sick as anxiety took control over every inch of my body.
She raised her eyebrows impatiently. “I’ll need your name and the name of your client.”

Remain calm, Anna, and maybe she won’t ask to see ID that you don’t actually have.
“Of course.
Amelia Roberts, here to see Mr. Emry Logan, please.” I rested my hand on the little ledge in front of
the plastic screen and tapped my fingers as if impatient that she was keeping me waiting. In reality,
this short, stout woman intimidated me. My eyes drifted over to the rows of desks on the other side of
the large room. To my surprise, just about every policeman sitting there had their eyes locked on me. I
felt my heart rate increase again at the realization and dizziness hit me. My eyes moved from face to
face to see if Buck was among them, but he wasn’t there. Why were they looking at me? Did I really
look
that
stunning, or was it because they could see through the act and I looked like a clown to them?

“Here,” Tiff said in her flat tone.

I turned my attention back to her. She was holding up a plastic card that I assumed was some sort of
pass to get back to where I needed to be. I hoped she wouldn’t assume I knew where I was going,
because I had no idea how to get back to where Emry was. I took the card from her hand. I almost
thanked her but decided against it. The attorney I was going for certainly wasn’t the polite type.

“Paul will take you back to where you need to be,” she told me. “Paul!” she called out, flailing her
arms above her head, motioning toward someone.

I watched as a tall, gangly man with blonde hair so light it could almost be mistaken as white,
stood. I heard a few of the policemen sneer and make comments to him as he awkwardly seemed to
trip over his own feet at first before falling into a stride and walking hesitantly toward me.

“Paul, take Ms Roberts back to cell number three-three-seven,” Tiff instructed him.

He said nothing but merely nodded his head and took off toward the doors just by the policemen’s
desks. I stayed a few paces back and tried to swallow my fear as I knew that every eye would be on
me as I walked by them. It felt awful to be the center of attention, a position I was certainly not used
to. I prayed that I wouldn’t trip over my own feet and tried to make my legs take the same long, quick
steps that I had practiced when coming in from the outside.

The heavy doors closed behind us, shutting out the group of policemen that had just been staring at
me. I felt so relieved to have gotten away from them, to have fooled Tiff and that my plan was
working. I felt a boastful smirk cross my lips as I followed Paul down a corridor. He said nothing to
me, and I wondered if he was shy or just the type of person who didn’t like to make small talk with
others. Nevertheless, I was grateful that he was the one leading me back into the depths of the prison.

We walked down more hallways. We were now in the midst of prison cells as inmates whistled
and called out to me as I walked by. This time it didn’t bother me. I didn’t even care. I worried more
about the other officers looking my way than these men locked up in their cells. I didn’t look their way
or flinch as they made their remarks. I walked behind Paul with my head facing forward and my
shoulders back. I was Amelia Roberts for the day. I was a big shot attorney. I was a professional.

Paul stopped in front of me and turned. “I’ll go get him.”

What did that mean exactly? Did he want me to stay here and wait or was I supposed to know
where to go? I watched him walk down the corridor alone the whole way to the end where I knew
Emry was. I felt a throb in my head with a sudden ache in both my temples. Adrenaline surged through
my veins. Paul was far away now, but I could still see his arms lifted up in the air as he unlocked the
entrance to Emry’s cell. A loud click and a buzzing sound as the door came open, echoed down the
hall, and I squinted to see clearly as a thin, tall figure emerged into the corridor, his hands being
handcuffed in front of him, his head lowered. Emry.

And then suddenly they were both walking toward me. My heart pumped faster, if that was even at
all possible. The palms of my hands began to sweat as I folded them in front of me and intertwined
them together. Another policeman came up from behind me.

“You’re Emry Logan’s attorney?” he asked.

 

I turned to face him, hating the fact that I had to turn away from Emry as he was only yards away
from me now. I nodded.

 

“You can come with me.” He seemed friendlier than Paul.

I followed him to another room just around the corner. It had a more casual feel to it than the
shadowy corridors that contained the jail cells and inmates within them. There were a few pictures of
art on the wall, a large desk and chairs positioned around it. There was a glass door at the back of the
small room that seemed to lead outside as the sunlight drifted in, giving it an even more pleasing feel.

The officer left, and I looked around apprehensively before tossing my coat onto the table and
settling down into one of the chairs so that I was facing the door where Emry would soon be walking
in through. And within minutes, he did.

Paul removed Emry’s handcuffs as soon as he entered the room. My heart fluttered at how close
Emry Logan was as he now stood before me. His head was still lowered. I stood and ran a hand down
over the front of my dress to smooth it out and make sure it wasn’t sticking to the pantyhose covering
my legs. Paul lingered for a moment.

“I’ll be right outside the door if you need me,” he said in a hushed voice.

I nodded, wanting to say thank you, but again, refraining. The door shut behind Paul and Emry
looked up then, our eyes meeting. I felt my breath come in gasps as he stared at me with those eyes so
blue and beautiful that it was difficult to imagine that I could ever have the willpower to look away.

I suddenly didn’t know what to say. He stood there on the other side of the desk, his face
expressionless, his hair in his eyes. I wanted so badly to reach over and wisp the strands back for
him, but I settled for extending my hand out for a handshake.

He kept staring at me, ignoring the gesture. “I already have a lawyer,” he said in a tone that seemed
borderline angry.

 

“I figured you did.” I drew my arm back embarrassed. He didn’t recognize me either. I had done a
great job on the costume and makeup.

 

“So who are you?” He eyed me suspiciously.

I smiled brightly, not able to contain it any longer. I was just so grateful to be able to see him after
all this time and to be able to see him face-to-face for the first time. He was just so breathtaking
standing before me. “Obviously not your lawyer,” I replied almost smugly. My smile widened.

He glared at me for a second more and then he practically climbed over the top of the table to stand
directly beside me and studied my face intently. “Is it really you? Anna?”

 

I nodded, the blonde wig moving slightly with so much enthusiasm. “Recognize me now?”

“Barely.” His eyes were illuminated as he looked me up and down admiring what I had created of
myself. “Wow,” he finally said. “I wish you were my lawyer.” He winked at me then, and we both
burst into laughter. Then his face got serious and his eyes less stern and gentler as he looked down at
the floor. “You did all this just to see me?”

I nodded, feeling slightly embarrassed again. Had I gone overboard? Was it too much? “I missed
you.” The words came out as a whisper.
I felt as if his eyes were penetrating mine. I could see my own reflection in those tiny pools of blue,
but the woman standing with her short blonde hair and made-up face was unrecognizable.
“Can I take your hand?” he asked me.

I felt his warm fingers slide into mine before I could respond to the question. I had dreamt of his
touch a hundred times in my mind and now we finally had our chance at last. His hand seemed large
as it completely consumed mine, and my heart heaved within my chest. And then he led me out of the
glass doors and into the brisk winter air outside. The sun floated down on us as I focused on the
warmth of his smooth skin and just being next to him. There was a small courtyard out here with a
patio, a few trees that were barren and a cement bench.

I leaned up against one of the walls, my back feeling the chill of the bricks through the dress. Emry
stood in front of me, inches from my face. He towered over me though I wore heels, and he put one
arm above my head and leaned his palm against the brick. I could see his breath coming from his
slightly parted lips as he bent over me. I felt the butterflies swirl in my stomach and the lump forming
in my throat. I couldn’t believe I was here at last with him, face to face. It had seemed an unattainable
feat, yet I had somehow overcome the impossible. I felt paralyzed, our mouths so close, breathing the
same air, our fingers still intertwined.

“Are you frightened by me?” he asked. I must have looked like a terrified mouse trying to crouch
lower and lower as this young, beautiful, yet tall and muscular creature hovered above me.

I opened my mouth to say something but felt the words stick in my throat, my nerves getting the best
of me now. I hesitated. I didn’t want to say the wrong thing as it was hard to concentrate on thinking.
My mind was so hazy at the moment.

“Are you frightened by me, Anna?” he repeated, lowering his arm and backing away slightly.
I frowned as we were no longer holding hands. “No,” I whispered, wishing I wasn’t such a tangled
mess around him.

He turned, and I could hear him sighing, his warm breath fleeing upwards in the chill of the air. He
glanced back around to face me running his hand through his brown hair. “Do you know why I’m in
here?”

I pulled my back away from the brick as I could feel the cold creeping into my bones. At least the
wind wasn’t able to whip around so easily within these thick, brick walls. I looked down at my feet,
the shiny black shoes that covered them. I nodded.

He seemed confused that I would know such a thing. “Why then?” he said sternly, demanding I tell
him. “What did you hear?”

 

I didn’t really want to repeat the horrid story or the way it had come from Buck’s mouth as if he
were making a mockery out of Emry.

 

“Please, Anna, tell me what you know.”

Now it was my turn to sigh. I looked up at him and saw a twinge of sorrow coming from his eyes. I
hated that look. It was the one expression of his I was becoming most accustomed to. “That you
supposedly threw a man off some tower,” I told him. “Your best friend.”

His face twisted in rage and he clenched his fists. “Who told you that?”
The lump in my throat was starting to burn. “Buck Brady.”

“Buck Brady?” He sneered at the very name just as Buck did with his. Well, that made the dislike
between the two of them equal now. “That figures. He likes you, you know. It was so obvious by the
way he acted around you that first day.”

I instantly sensed the hint of jealousy in his tone. I felt a sudden joy at the realization. I watched him
study me for a moment. I stared back but didn’t say a word.
“Of course you know that,” he continued. “You’re a smart girl.”

Then he froze in place for a moment, and I thought I had seen a sudden calmness come over him just
then. He had made a realization of his own.

“Wait. You said supposedly.”
I nodded, rethinking my words very carefully.
“What do you mean by that?”
“Well,” I began slowly. “You didn’t actually do it. Did you?”
He walked closer to me, his face near mine.
“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” I moved away from him in one sudden movement, trying to get to the opposite
wall, away from him, anger filling me. So he was a murderer? So all of this nonsense going on inside
my head thinking about him every second of every day was all for nothing? But as I swung my arm
backwards, I felt him grip onto it tightly, yet gently at the same time, and turn me back around to face
him. He wrapped his fingers in mine once more and held me in place.

“You don’t understand, Anna. It’s complicated,” he whispered, his eyes searching my face.