Strapped: A Second Chance Mafia Romance (3 page)

2
5th November 2010

“
S
o what do you think
?” My cousin Johnny asks me, with that naughty glint in his eye.

I want to shake my head and say no, but unfortunately I keep finding his offers irresistible. I haven’t been doing any of the really bad things, not like he has, but I have been pushing the boundaries and taking risks. I have been doing things that I know for a fact that Olivia won’t like.

That’s the worst part – knowing that I’m letting her down. She’s trusted me, believed in me, pushed me to be better, and I’m inadvertently throwing it all back in her face. I tried, I really did, and in a way I still am. I’ve been working harder in school than I would have had she not been around, it’s just after school where I’m getting in to trouble.

She thinks that I’m always at work with Johnny in my uncle’s chop shop – which for the most part I am – but I’m also doing some extra things for little earners too... all for Johnny’s new gang. It started off simply enough – delivering some cannabis to some low life druggies for an extortionate fee. For a boy like me with nothing to his name, it was an amount that was too much to resist.

But then the jobs kept rolling in. Nothing too hard, nothing too scary, but they keep on getting worse every single time, and I can’t help but worry that it’s some sort of test, and that I’m about to be dragged in to something that I won’t be able to control.

“I don’t know, man,” I tell him honestly. “This seems a bit much, and honestly I think people are talking about us now...”

I’m not sure that’s totally true, or if it’s just my newly increased paranoia, but I feel like everyone knows I’ve changed, and that I’m sinking into something. I don't like that – if people do know, it won’t be long until Olivia finds out.

“Come on, don’t be a pussy! You threatened Lee Flood,” he tells me, shrugging as if it’s nothing. “This won’t be too much different... only this time the baseball bat won’t just be for show.”

I gulp down the fear that starts coursing through my veins. Is this really what I’ve become? Is this really the path that I want my life to head down? Can I say no now? Really? I mean, I can to Johnny, but even I can see that he isn’t exactly in charge of all of this.

The problem is, I know where this life leads. It’ll take me to juvie, which will taint my record forever, meaning that it won’t matter how hard I work – it’ll all be for nothing. Then it will become a life of petty crime which will grow and escalate until I’m nothing but a criminal. I’m already not good enough for Olivia – I don't want to make that even worse.

If I’m locked up, she’ll never want to see me again...

With my mind made up, I open my mouth to determinedly tell my cousin that I’m out, but before I do, the doors to the chop shop burst open and I find myself surrounded by piercing, blinding lights.

“Police, nobody move!” Someone yells, as I try to cover up my eyes. “All of you, put your hands in the air and get on your knees.”

Everything stills as my mind realizes what’s happening. This is it, my worst nightmare coming true, and I haven’t even really done anything. I fall to the ground with a thud, a cold shock consuming my entire body. Olivia’s sweet face swims through my mind as chaos erupts around me. The whole world speeds up, so fast that I can’t keep track of anything that’s happening. I try to focus on anyone, on anything, to figure something out, but nothing sticks.

Until the words come. The ones that cause the nausea to turn to vomit, which splashes on the ground beneath me. “You are under arrest.”

* * *

2
4
^th
September 2014

A
s I sit
at the bar in Birds, I can’t help but wonder what on Earth possessed me to pick such a place to meet Olivia. She will fit in perfectly here – she’s glamorous enough to make any room light up – but I stand out like a dirty, unwelcome sore thumb. Even dressed up as nicely as I can muster, I look grimy compared to the other clientele.

It just isn’t the sort of place where leathers and tattoos are welcome.

My eyes flicker over to the door every time someone walks in, but I still manage to find myself surprised when it’s actually her. I stand up to greet her, instantly drinking in her appearance gratefully. She’s wearing a tight black, stark pencil skirt and a pale blue gypsy style top. Her hair is tied up in a way that reminds me of the sixteen-year-old girl I once knew. She always scraped her hair out of the way when she was thinking hard, and that familiar side of her makes me smile brightly.

As her eyes meet mine, she lights up in a way that’s really dangerous. It instantly reminds me why I should be keeping my distance from her. I knew it back then, and I know it again now – only the magnetic pull of her keeps reeling me back in no matter how hard I try.

Not that I’ve been trying very hard.

“Hi Liv,” I cringe as I find myself slipping back into familiarities far too soon. She always hated nicknames from anyone else, but allowed me to call her Liv – but that was then. I’m sure that I’ve lost that privilege now, so I need to cover it up quickly before it makes things awkward. “What would you like to drink?”

As she asks for a sweet white wine, I realize that this will be the first time that I’ve ever seen her drink that it’s almost strange to watch her drink. She was underage the last time we were together, and she had no desire to break that rule unlike me, which means I’ve never saw her even sipping alcohol. The fact that she knows what she likes, and she’s ordering it so easily is a clear reminder that there’s a lot of her life that I’ve missed. I haven’t seen that progression of her growing from childhood to adulthood, which I now sorely regret.

Of course, she’s missed that for me too – but that’s probably for the best.

“So, how was your week?” I ask, sounding far too stilted for my liking. “How is the new job?”

“It’s good actually,” she starts, with a smile on her face. “I mean, it’s kind of hard, and I do get all the shitty jobs, but everyone has to start somewhere I suppose.” From the way that her expression contorts, I can tell that this sucks far more than she’s letting on, but I don't push her to tell me more because I know from past experience that’s a sure-fire way to get her to shut down completely. “I’m sure it’ll get better though...” she finished lamely, before turning her attention to me. “So we never got around to you... what is it that you’re doing these days?”

I consider lying, but from the soul-searching way that she’s looking at me, I know that I won’t be able to fool her. But I also know that she won’t like the answer. “Oh you know me,” I laugh hollowly. “This and that... keeping busy.”

“Right,” she hangs her head down, refusing to look at me. The disappointment emanates off of her, which forces that cold shame through my veins again.

Why do I always feel like shit around Olivia?
I think to myself, before answering my own question.
It’s because I’ve let her down... I always let her down...

Not wanting to focus on the present for another second longer, I decide that a trip down memory lane might do us better. Gulping down the remainder of my drink, an idea pops into my mind.

“Hey, would you like to go for a walk?” I ask her. “Get out of here.” I glance my eyes around. “It’s pretty boring, isn’t it?”

“Okay,” she nods slowly. “That sounds nice.”

As we wander along towards the nearby park, I can tell from the way that she’s practically holding herself together with her arms that she’s afraid, that she’s thinks I’m dangerous. I wish that I could reassure her and tell her that I’m not, but I can’t. I
am
dangerous, although I’d never allow any harm to come to her.

“Do you remember this place?” I ask as we arrive, and I watch as she looks up allowing realization to hit her. “Our very first date.”

“Oh wow,” she gasps, gripping her chest as the memory floods through her. “I can’t believe you remember.”

“Of course I do!” I tell her, feeling a little insulted. “I would never forget.”

“I was
so
nervous,” she exclaims, looking back at me. “I just couldn't believe that the infamous, most gorgeous guy in school had asked boring old
me
out.”

I don't remember it that way at all – I remember the agonizing nights spent trying to work myself up to do it. I wasn't even a bad boy back then, not at that point anyway, but because of my gang I had the reputation that I was. I also wasn't really a player – girls terrified me – but somehow, because girls seemed to throw themselves at me, I gained that reputation too.

It was insane.

But no one else meant anything to me – there was only Olivia, the girl that I had been dreaming about for years. It took me a long time to get there, but I finally managed to ask, and I couldn't actually believe it that she said yes.

Looking back, it was kind of lame to bring her to the park, but at the time I thought it was incredibly romantic. A glimpse of nature in and among our very gray city.

We spent that evening talking anxiously, and limply holding hands. She nervously chatted about God knows what to me, while my mind whirred, wanting nothing more than to kiss her. All I wanted to do was claim her as my own, but I didn’t quite get there. I desperately wanted to, but I was too afraid to make a move.

As I glance over to her overly excited face as she reminisces over our date, I find myself exactly in the same position. All these years later and all I want to do is kiss her.

But I can’t. I have to resist.

So why am I sitting on the bench where we first made out, and ensuring that my arm will be around her as she joins me?

“This is still really beautiful,” she sighs wistfully. “I think that it’s my favorite place in the whole city.”

“Me too,” I murmur, looking only at her.

Sensing the new need within me, she glances up at me with an excited terror in her eyes.

One...

Two...

Three...

She keeps eye contact with me for three whole seconds, which is a clear-cut sign that it isn’t just me that wants to kiss. She wants it too.

I lean in, no longer able to listen to the rational side of me. This girl is irresistible, and that desire-filled look that she’s giving me is making it damn near impossible for me to even think straight. We’re magnetic, me and Liv, there’s a chemistry between us that completely overshadows everything else.

She’s mine,
I think to myself.
She always has been. It doesn’t have to make sense, it just... is.

And then our lips crash together, and the intense fireworks that can only come from her, explode within me. I wrap my arms around her, bringing her into me, and from the way that she molds into me, and an involuntary moan escapes her throat, she’s feeling that same fire too...

2
6th November 2010

“...
g
lucose can be converted
into pyruvate which releases adenosine triphosphate by cellular respiration...”

As I read my textbook aloud, trying to get some of the information to sink into my brain that has slowly become stupid overnight, the worry comes back into the forefront of my mind. I’ve been trying not to freak out about the fact that Marco hasn’t texted me back since yesterday evening, but I can’t help but worry that something terrible has happened to him. He was only working in the chop shop with his cousin, so he probably ended up going out for a few drinks with him, but I can’t seem to stop my mind from concocting some of the most awful scenarios possible.

What if that awful gang of guys got to him?

What if he’s hurt somewhere?

What if he’s been killed?

I’ve never been known for my overactive imagination before, but when it comes to Marco I can’t help myself. The life surrounding him and his friends is crazy, and I can’t say that I like it. For me, locked away in my nice home on a lovely street with kind neighbors, I don’t know much about his lifestyle except what I’ve seen through him, but I’m not naive enough to ignore the bad stuff that happens there.

My heart pounds noisily as I check my phone once more, just to growl in frustration when there’s nothing there.

“Olivia?”

Oh God, I roll my eyes in annoyance as my dad bursts into my room, regardless of me ignoring his knock. I really don't need a lecture from him right now – he’s a very strict judge, and he runs his home like a courtroom sometimes, which drives me mad. Honestly, he’s a big part of the reason that I keep my relationship with Marco mostly a secret from my parents. They know about him, but that’s all. I never mention him, I never bring him around the house, and they don’t talk about him either.

It’s just easier for all of us.

“What’s wrong, dad?” I sigh, shutting my books. I’m only acting like I’m studying anyway, so there’s no point in keeping up the facade.

“It’s Marco Fabbri,” he tells me, causing my eyes to snap up in shock. I certainly wasn't expecting him to bring my boyfriend up now... which can only mean bad news. Maybe he’s heard something that I haven’t. Maybe he knows why he hasn’t been in touch.

“Why? What is it?” I gasp, scooting closer to the end of the bed despite myself. “What’s going on?”

“Your... boyfriend was arrested last night,” he tells me through gritted teeth. With each second that passes, his face grows redder and redder, which causes my mind to spin even more.

Arrested?

What the...?

“What for?” I demand, needing to know the truth. I don't think that I’ll be able to accept it until I have some sort of proof. Sure, things have been a little weird with Marco recently, and I’ve been ever so slightly suspicious of him, but never to this extent. This seems like the sort of thing that I would believe about his friends, but not him.

Never him.

“Violence, stealing, criminal activities,” my dad glares down at me, as if this is my fault. “I can get you the police report if you like?”

I shake my head numbly, not sure that I want to know now.

“He was supposed to go to juvenile detention, but I pulled some strings to get him off,” I’m really taken aback by this comment, I actually can’t believe it! My dad has never done anything to bend the rules before, and to think that he would do it for me... for the boyfriend that he hates, is absolutely unbelievable. “But that is only on the condition that you cannot see him anymore.”

“What?!” I gasp out breathlessly. I shouldn’t be shocked, I should have known that there would be strings attached, but this seems extreme even for him. “You can’t do that,” I insist. “I’m an adult now.”

“You are seventeen years old – not an adult,” he replies firmly. “And you will do as I say or I will make sure that he is locked up. I’m deadly serious about this – he is forbidden to you.”

With that, he stalks from the room, leaving me with only my tears for company.

* * *

2
9
^th
September 2014

I
tap
my pen on the desk, staring out of the window as I daydream about Marco. I’m normally rushed off my feet at work, so to have these few moments to myself to just have a think is amazing and I intend to take full advantage of that.

I still cannot believe that he has come back into my life in this way! It’s absolutely crazy. I went to meet him with thoughts that we would only be friends, but after that kiss I know that it’s impossible. That intense chemistry we have between us hasn’t dulled at all over the years, and I can’t see any point in trying to resist it. In fact, I’m more than ready to just embrace it and throw myself fully into the possibility of us.

I came to New York for a job that I thought was going to be much more amazing than it actually is, and I had absolutely no expectations when it came to my love life – where it seems that I’m actually succeeding. Of course I knew that the guy pool was going to be much bigger than back home, but it’s still gone much better than I thought it would.

There
are
some issues when it comes to Marco, I’m smart enough to realize that, but at the moment all I can focus on is the good stuff. Sure, he’s dangerous, and I know that he’s doing something dangerous with his life, but I helped him get out of that pit before, and I feel like I might be able to do it again.

“Psst, Olivia,” my only friend in this Godforsaken hellhole whispers into my ear. “The boss is doing the rounds.”

I spin around to smile at him, before making myself look busy. Ryan started at Elite Advertising just before me, so he is basically on the same rung of the company as I am. That has built a bond between us, and we’ve started to look out for one another, creating the friendship that we have.

As soon as the bitchy boss has stalked through our section of the office, I let out a sigh of relief. “Thanks, Ryan, she would have killed me otherwise!”

He laughs musically, and slumps back into his seat, relaxing more too. “So, do you have any plans this weekend?”

“I’m not sure,” I sigh, hoping that I’ll be seeing Marco. We’ve been in touch a little bit, but not enough to make any future plans which is kind of frustrating. “How about you?”

“I have a date, of course...” he winks exaggeratedly in my direction and I roll my eyes. Ryan has moved here from a small town too, only he has always lived there, so this new pool of women is amazing to him and he’s fully taking advantage of that. “You know me.”

“True, true,” I chuckle. “There’s always someone there waiting for you.”

I can understand it – Ryan is a very good-looking guy in a preppy kind of way. He’s the sort of guy that you could take home to your mom and she would instantly approve. The sort of guy that my parents would love me to be with – but one that I will never be attracted to.

Not when I’ve got Marco waiting for me.

* * *

B
y the time 5
:00 p.m. rolls around, I’m absolutely exhausted and more than ready to get home. At the end of every single day I feel disillusioned with this place because again I find that I haven’t learned anything new or had the chance to show off my skills yet. All my learning is going to waste. Even when I try to remind myself that I need to do it this way to pay my dues, it doesn’t make me feel any better.

I step out of the door and suck in a few deep, cool and calming breaths of air before making the journey home, but before I can even take the first step, I hear someone call out my name.

“Olivia!”

I spin around to see Marco dressed in his bike leathers, but he isn’t standing near a motorbike, he’s leaning up against a really cool looking sporty car. My heart instantly leaps up into my throat and my mouth runs dry with desire as I see him there. It reminds me of just how spontaneous he is. He isn’t always one for making plans, but that doesn’t mean I won’t see him. He prefers spontaneity and surprises, and while I’ve always been the opposite of that, I don’t mind when it comes to Marco. He brings me out of my shell in ways that I never expect, and I love that.

“Oh hi, Marco,” I walk over to him, folding my arms across my chest because I feel a little shy. “How are you?”

“I’m good,” he grins, before pulling me in for a hug and kissing me lightly on the top of my head. I move closer into his body, getting a discrete feel of his body underneath the grungy t-shirt he’s wearing. I can feel abs under there that weren’t there before, which causes my heart to pound with excitement. He might be familiar to me in so many ways, but there is a lot still to explore about him too, and I really can’t wait for that. “Let’s go for a drive.”

I hop into the front seat of the car, feeling far cooler than I actually am in this amazing car that screams money and luxury. It isn’t until we’re pulling away and I see Ryan leaving the office in time to give me a really strange look, that I realize just how crazy this must seem. To me, it’s normal for me to act out of character for this gorgeous man, but to the rest of the world we must make no sense whatsoever. We’re too different to even comply with the
opposites attract
rule.

Not that I care. I know that we make sense, and that’s all that matters.

We cruise around the city for a bit, chatting casually about our week, all the while there is an internal need growing deeply inside of me. On the outside I’m acting like everything is totally normal, but I have to keep shifting on my seat because the desire is growing inside of me until the point where it’s almost frustrating.

“Thanks for the tour of the city,” I joke, needing to be bold for the first time in my life. I’m not normally so brave and forward, but this is Marco, and now that I’ve accepted we’re going to wind up together no matter what, I’m keen to get things moving in the right direction. “But why don’t we go park for a bit?”

Marco shoots me a look, as if he can’t quite read my expression, but he seems to at least suspect where I might be going with this because he pulls the car over to the side of the road, under a dark bridge where no one can see us.

“Are you okay, Liv?” He asks curiously.

“I am,” I practically whisper. “I just...” I want to get the words out, to tell him what I want to do to him, but I can’t seem to manage it, so instead I reach over, grab hold of his shirt and tug him towards me until our lips meet once more.

My heart flutters as his mouth starts to claim me. He kisses me hungrily, excitedly, and that only increases my passion for him.

I wrap my hands tightly around his neck and lean back a little, giving him the room that he needs to trail his fingers down my body. I’m engulfed by passion, consumed by desire and I feel like I have to have this guy right now, no matter where we are or what situation we’re in.

Once again, Marco Fabbri has stripped me of the good girl I am, turning me into something else...

I run my fingers through his hair, gripping tighter to it as he finds the outline of my panties. They are only a simple cotton pair because I wasn't exactly expecting this to happen, but that doesn’t seem to bother Marco. He growls gruffly against me, and yanks my underwear to once side, exploring my hot, wet desire for the first time in many years. It might be a long time since he was last there, but with his fingers inside of me, it feels like we’ve never been apart.

“Oh shit,” I bust out. “That feels...”

But I don't finish my sentence. Instead I allow my head to fall as the sensations coursing through my body consume me. Marco begins flicking my clit, bringing me too close to the edge of desire far too quickly.

“Don’t stop,” I panic, trying to pull back. “I need... I need...”

But he claims me, controls my body and soon the intense waves of pleasure are shattering through my body, and I’m shuddering and crying out beneath him. I can’t even be disappointed that we didn’t get to have sex, because Marco has left my body feeling absolutely amazing.