Strings (22 page)

My jaw drops. “What kind of proof?”

“
An email Rax sent me
before the blowup. It had the lyrics along with some notes about
chords and time signatures. According to Kate, she wrote it on
Halloween. Rax’s email dates October 2.” She shrugs. “Seemed like
pretty compelling evidence to me. So I confronted Kate about it.
Told her if she didn’t join you on tour, I’d publicize the
email.”

I chuckle. “You sneaky, conniving,
rat-bitch. Remind me never to get on your bad side.” Wow.

“
It’s who I am. Look, I
did it for the greater good. If I’d told you the truth, the tour
would’ve been over before it started. You’d never have gotten a
chance to shine. I wanted this for you guys.” She studies her mug.
“Still do. I guess it’s not meant to be.”

I glance out the window. Toombs strolls
aimlessly around the parking lot, kicking rocks with his combat
boots, head hung low. I’m tempted to join him.

Phone to his ear, Shades steps into the
aisle and heads toward us. “Doesn’t Cam play guitar? …What about
Dru?…Shit. Okay, let me know if you find any prospects. Thanks,
man.” He ends his call with a heavy sigh.

“
What are you up to?”
Jillian asks.

He frowns. “I was looking for some chicks to
audition for the open guitar spot. No luck.”

My spirits lift like my miniskirt over a
monitor when I hit a low G on my bass. Shades tried to save my
career. I throw my arms around his neck and dive into his lips,
thanking him for his efforts with a heapin’ helping of tongue.

“
Knock it off, you two.”
Jillian smacks my ass.

I ignore her and keep on keepin’ on. Shades
smiles around my kisses. When we break, he says, “What was that
for?”

I comb my fingers through his thick, dark
hair. “You tried to help Jinx and me.”

“
Yeah, but I didn’t find
anyone.”

“
Doesn’t matter. It’s the
thought that counts.”

“
I’ve got a few more
numbers in my little black book.” He runs his hand up my back and
raises a pierced brow. “Shower first?”

I smile. “I thought you’d never ask.”

My pulse races to brand new beats as I grab
a towel and follow Shades to the back.

“
Uhhh…” Rax sprawls on all
fours, staring into the toilet water mirror. “Goddamn it. I’m
fucking dying.”

“
How much did you drink
last night?” Not that I’m worried. Curious more than
anything.

“
A bottle of vodka. Maybe
two.”

“
Fuck, Rax. What the hell
were you thinking, man?” Shades says.

“
I wasn’t. My dick was.”
He flops over on his side and rubs his stomach. “Oh,
Lola…”

Shades and I shake our heads and then follow
one another into the shower.

The space is tight, but there’s just enough
room to bump uglies. He wastes no time parting my meat curtains
with his pork sword. The water in this aqua box doesn’t stay hot
for long, so we double-time it by tending to washing and fuck
duties simultaneously.

As soap and shampoo glide down our joined
bodies, I snap my realism filter in place.

“
There’s a good chance
this audition thing won’t work out, and I’ll have to leave.” I meet
his slow thrusts, clamoring for control of my spinning emotions,
barely holding onto them.

“
Yeah,” he says. Another
slow push into me, then retreat.

My hips urge him to move faster. He takes
his time. Such a fucking tease.

Water drips into my crevices. His lunging
cock wakes me from my daze, and his lips bump into mine as he says,
“There’s always Athens. Meet you for drinks at BAR-k in a couple
months?”

“
That’s all I get? I
couple of lousy drinks?” I pout playfully and pretend I’m joking,
but really, I’m not. “Not even a night in your dad’s hotel? I’ll
bring the strap-on…”

He pushes my back into the wet wall and
hoists me up, impaling me in the best way. He fucks me like I’m the
last woman on Earth, and I give it to him hard and heavy.

“
Stay with me, Letty.” Now
it’s not just his cock that’s piercing me. His tight, intent green
gaze is even sharper. It leaves a soul-deep puncture wound. “I
don’t have much anymore, but I’ll give you everything I
got.”

I hug him and rock my hips into his with all
the tenderness I can muster. “I don’t need money to be happy. I’d
love to spend the rest of the tour hanging out with you, but you
know as well as I do, if I’m not making music, I’m masquerading as
someone else. That’s just not me, Shades.”

He hits the brakes on the cock-sploration.
He starts to say something but stops himself. Hope blows off his
face like dandelion seeds in the wind. I lift a hand to stop them,
but it’s too late.

In the ensuing awkward moment, I take
control of the pelvic action, but my heart’s not in it. It’s with
those seeds that drifted away. We stare at each other in silence
until our orgasms close in, give us a pair of quick, empty thrills,
and leave us standing together but alone under a spray of cold
water.

We towel off in silence.

Even if we do find another guitarist, no one
will come close to Kate. Much as I hate to admit it, the best thing
that ever happened to Cherry Buzz Float walked out of our lives a
few hours ago. Kate is irreplaceable.

* * * *

“
I think we need to take
Rax to the hospital.” Toombs’s frantic pacing up and down the aisle
and his pinched voice tell me something’s seriously wrong. Toombs
doesn’t get upset about anything.

“
He still puking?” Jillian
asks.

“
No, he’s passed out.
Breaths are really slow. Too slow.” He rubs his hair
furiously.

Jillian, Shades, Jinx, and I head to the
back of the bus. Rax’s still form is curled next to the toilet.

My blood pressure drops a little, and I turn
to Shades. The credits roll, blaring a long list of rock ’n’ roll
casualties in my mind. Hendrix. Bonham. Joplin. Morrison.

“
He drank a
lot
last night,” I say.
“He might have alcohol poisoning. We should call 911.”

With no debate, Jillian whips out her phone
and makes the call.

I squat next to Rax and feel his head. He’s
cold. Pulse is very weak. Shit, this dude is way worse off than I
thought. I swallow the bile climbing my throat. If he—God
forbid—dies…

Fuck. I clasp his clammy hand and hold on.
Shades and Toombs hover behind me.

After the longest ten minutes of my life, a
wailing ambulance rolls into the parking lot, lights blazing. The
paramedics ask us to clear the bus. Toombs refuses to leave Rax’s
side, and I’m kinda glad. The thought of him being alone bugs me.
Nobody should have to go through hell by himself. Not even a cunt
monger like Rax.

As we wait outside, Shades’s arms descend
around me from behind, and I lean against his chest for support.
He’s shaking too. It’s cold out here, but I’m sweating like a hog
in August.

“
You okay?” I
say.

He stares at the bus. “Stupid prick. Why’d
he have to…?” He rubs his eyes. “Shit.”

I turn in his arms and lay my head on his
shoulder. The pine scent of his fancy guy perfume fills my nose and
comforts me a tiny bit. When he hugs me, a surge of tension
releases from his muscles.

“
You can’t hold yourself
responsible. Rax made his own choices. But he’ll be okay. He has to
be.”

Shades must know as well as I do, I’m being
overly optimistic. We should’ve called for help sooner. I should’ve
recognized the signs.

But it’s out of our hands now.

Two EMTs haul Rax off the bus on a
stretcher. He’s not moving. One of the guys holds up an IV bag.
They load him into the ambulance, and Jillian flaps behind them
like a clucking mother hen. “Where are you taking him? Is he gonna
be okay?”

Toombs descends the steps, looking after his
friend, his face a tangle of agonized lines. Jinx hangs on the
sidelines, gnawing on her fingernails. Blond hair masks her
face.

“
Memorial Hospital,” the
EMT says. “You can meet us there.” He closes the back of the
ambulance and gets in the passenger seat. The siren screams as they
peel out of the parking lot. My heart burrows into my
guts.

Shades, Toombs, Jinx, Jillian, and I stand
in a circle, staring at each other in a daze. How the hell did this
happen? Yesterday, all was right with the world. No worries,
carefree music, gigs aplenty. Today, I have no band, Rax’s very
life may be hanging by a thread, and everything’s gone to shit.

“
I’m gonna grab a taxi to
the hospital.” Jillian pulls out her phone and taps the screen.
“Toombs, you coming with?”

The guy’s face is white as snow. Lips
pressed tightly together, he shakes his head.

“
Okay. I’ll call you as
soon as I know something. Stay put for now.”

Toombs trudges to the bus. “Fucking
motherfuck.” He punches the side of the metal beast and climbs
aboard.

Jillian disappears to the other side of the
bus as she makes arrangements with the cab company. I set my jaw
and meet Jinx’s teary eyes. Her lips tremble, and she takes the
steps, head hung.

Too overwhelmed to do anything else, I plant
my ass on the pavement and rest my arms and head on bent knees. The
emotion catches up with me, and I have to let it out. I can’t take
any more. I cry. And cry. And cry some more.

Shades drops beside me. His arms enfold me.
And he holds me.

For The Rock

When I finally pull myself together, Shades
follows me to the bus where it’s warm. I guess it’s time to pack up
for real.

A beautiful, sad stream of notes pumps
through a monitor. A guitar.

But both of our guitarists are out of
commission. Who the hell—

Toombs?

I shiver. Goosebumps swarm my skin.

My attention poked, I head
tentatively to the back of the bus, dragging Shades behind me by
the hand. Jinx stands by the shower, biting her thumbnail. Toombs
sits on the edge of the couch, head lowered, lids shuttered
tightly, masterfully picking the strings on Rax’s guitar like some
kind of tribute to his friend. I knew the guy could play, but I had
no idea he played like
this
. It’s pure brilliance. I mean,
heart gripping, deep, soulful. Not at all what I would expect from
a scary dude like him.

There’s way more to Toombs Badcock than
meets the eye.

When the mournful song ends and I retrieve
my jaw from the floor, I clap. Jinx joins my applause, and Shades
smiles weakly. Maybe it’s because I’m still so raw from the events
of the last twenty-four hours, but I get up the nerve to lay a hand
on Toombs’s shoulder. “Man, that was the most beautiful fucking
thing I’ve ever heard.”

He nods once but doesn’t look at me.

“
How did you learn to play
like that?” I sit next to him, leaving a good foot between us. Jinx
slinks off to the side by the partition behind the
bunks.

Toombs shrugs and breaks into another song.
It’s the one Rax and Kate fought over so hard. In Toombs’s hands,
though, it has a totally different feel. Somber notes, improvised
melancholy. This guy is seriously hurting.

Fuck that.

I get up and head for my bunk trundle to get
my bass. I plug the bitch in and hop on the music train with
Toombs, adding in a happier groove to his tribute. He looks at me
curiously but doesn’t stop playing. I coax him over to the lighter
side of The Rock with a funky run intermingled with exaggerated
thumb slaps. Shades’s palm rubs a few quick circles on my back.

Next thing I know, he’s on his feet,
grabbing his bass and tuning in with us. Jinx runs to her bunk for
her sticks and falls in last. She doesn’t have drums, but she beats
the seat, the floor, the metal overhead—she makes every available
surface her bitch.

It still amazes me how different she is with
a pair of sticks in her hands. The coolest fucking drummer on the
planet.

My personal darkness lightens as music
blossoms like spring flowers around us. The mood shifts from
downright depressing to hopeful. I look at the three faces
surrounding me, and I let go of a laugh. Our joint musical
evolution left Rax’s song behind, and now it’s something completely
different. Jinx’s head bops to a funky 5/8 beat. Shades and I duel,
armed with only our basses. Toombs’s expression softens as his
fingers fly across the frets and his arm pumps out quirky
chords.

The Rock seizes my soul, and I start rapping
a bunch of shit.

“
Rax’s dick got him in
some trouble. Shoulda stayed away from that stripper Lola. That
girl brung him down to his knees. But you can’t blame a stripper
for being a tease. She gotta give him all she got. It’s her job to
get him hot. Gotta make her some green so she can surf that
stripper scene.

“
Rax, why you drink so
much, motherfucker? You shoot too much booze, it gonna git you,
sucker. We gotcha here in our hearts, and we ain’t lettin’ you
leave these parts. Too early for you to go, stupid fuckin’ prick.
You got too many more women to stuff with your dick. Think of Lola
while you get better, and we’ll be here singin’ you musical love
letters.”

Shades laughs, and even Toombs cracks a
smile. Jinx’s blond hair flies around her head as she puts her
whole body into beats she conjures like some kind of
battle-hardened pixie. The music enshrouds us in a cloud of
awesome, and I let it whisk me away to a happier place.