Stronger with You (With You Trilogy) (5 page)

“I…” I didn’t know what to say. “Thank you,” I nodded uncertainly.

“You forgive us?” Rick asked.

“Of course,” I smiled. “I thought you were mad at me.”

“We were,” Danny shrugged. “But we probably shouldn’t have been.”

They pulled me up from the sofa and gave me a jelly sandwich, which had me beaming up at the two of them.

I hardly ever answered my brothers back when they were mad at me, if I ever did it usually put me in a worse situation. It seemed like it had paid off for once though and I was glad for it.

Chapter 4

Sunday, 13th January 2013

The smell of the bacon sizzling under the grill filled the room. I was in charge of frying the eggs and our cramped kitchen was a buzzing hive of activity as we all darted around trying to pull together a proper English breakfast.

We’d all agreed that Sunday would be our day off and that we would all come out from underneath the mountains of lecture notes and books to be social and have fun. We’d pulled out all the stops; we had veggie sausages, bacon, and their meat-based counterparts. We’d omitted the black pudding because none of the meat-eaters seemed particularly keen on eating it. We sat around the kitchen table with our mismatched plates and cutlery and I couldn’t wipe the grin off my face.

These were my friends and flatmates, people I could be myself around. After almost a month back home with my brothers, I’d almost forgotten how good it felt to have a little independence. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my brothers, but they were all big and loud, and worst of all, bossy. It hadn’t been too bad because I’d had Jason to keep me positive, and I had missed them all, but a month was a long time.

We chatted away about our time at home over the Christmas break. Adam and I kept relatively quiet. I suspected his reasons were the same as mine; the others all seemed to have had perfect Christmases with their perfect families. My Christmas had been pretty awesome in comparison to previous years, but probably not even close to the seasonal festivities my flatmates were describing.

“I’ll wash,” Adam volunteered as we started clearing the table.

“Me too,” I smiled, taking a pile of dishes to the second sink.

Eric and Sarah dried whilst Bradley and Emma tidied up the mess and wiped down the surfaces. We’d decided, after much deliberation, that we would spend the rest of the day watching an awesome movie marathon and then order takeaway for dinner.

Adam followed me into my room to fetch my ‘Gremlins’ DVD, which the twins had given me for Christmas a few years ago. I picked it out from the stack and sat down next to him on the bed.

“Man, it’s nice to have a break from-” he started, but I cut home off.

“Don’t say it! No talking about exams today, remember?” I smiled at him.

He grinned back at me and lounged back on my bed, fiddling with the pictures I had blue tacked on the wall.

“How’s Jason?” He asked.

“Busy,” I pouted. “He’s all thesis, thesis, thesis this week but he’s still giving me my four nights a week.”

“Are you going to move in with him?”

“I don’t know,” I frowned. “I love him more than anything but I feel like I depend on him too much already. I want to become strong enough that I can choose to give up some of my independence. If we push forwards before I’m ready, I’ll be foregoing independence because I’m not strong enough to stand alone.”

I knew I was being a little indecisive and unclear but it was hard to put my feelings into words. Since moving out, I had begun to experience the first freedom I’d ever really had. Jason wanted to keep me safe and I appreciated it, I really did, but I needed to learn who I was a person and I couldn’t do that if he didn’t give me room to grow.

“I know it’s selfish but I hope you don’t,” he pouted.

“Really?” I asked, surprised by the statement.

He nodded back at me. “I was sort of hoping we could live together next year as well,” he said bashfully.

“I’d like that,” I nodded enthusiastically. I loved living with Adam, he was brilliant and I owed him a life debt for being there for me when I needed him most.

“Don’t have to make plans just yet, but just wanted you to know,” he smiled.

I hugged him appreciatively and was about to drag him off the bed and down to the common room to meet the others when my phone vibrated to remind me I had a text message. The screen showed one missed call and two texts, one from Jason and the other from Ian. I opened Jason’s first because I feared Ian’s would put me in a bad mood and I wanted to put it off.

Hey little squirrel :)

Sleep at mine tonight?

I miss you and love you

xxx

Much as I would have loved to spend the night at Jason’s flat, I’d promised my flatmates I’d spend the day with them and we all needed a bit of fun and relaxation. I text Jason back explaining and suggested we spend the following evening together. That way, I could spend the day revising and the evening with him. I checked Ian’s text next, bracing myself for something bad.

Hi Jelly. I need to

talk to you, call my

mobile when you get

this.

Not so bad
. No smilies or kisses but I think I would have died from shock if there had been.

“I have to call my brother quickly. You mind?” I apologised to Adam.

“No worries, I’ll just nip and get some DVDs from my room, back in a few.”

I dialled Ian’s number with a hint of anxiety looming in the pit of my stomach. I hoped Ian was just calling to check up on me and that I hadn’t done anything wrong or pissed him off somehow.

“Jelly,” he answered warmly on the third ring.

“Hi, Ian,” I replied happily, glad to hear the warmth in his voice.

“How come you didn’t answer earlier?” He asked casually, but I was in no doubt that a lot of weight was placed on my response.

“I was having breakfast with my flatmates, sorry,” I apologised.

“I called you at eleven,” he said, his voice hardening.

“Well, brunch, then,” I said softly.

“You should be revising,” he said, the warmth in his voice gone completely.

“I… we… we’re having a day off,” I mumbled, watching as Adam slipped back into my room.

“The time for a day off is when your exams are over, Jelly,” he admonished.

I wanted to argue, to tell him that I’d been revising from eight until six every day since we got back but I didn’t want to make him mad.

“Sorry, sir,” I said quietly, wishing he’d go back to being happy.

I heard him sigh down the phone at me. I knew he was frustrated. When I was at school, he would make sure I revised whenever I wasn’t sleeping or eating, giving me breaks to work out with them before I got back to it. I shouldn’t complain, my GCSE and A-Level results had been almost perfect, but I didn’t have much of a social life then. I didn’t want to lose the few friends I now had because I was always studying.

“Just… don’t let us down, Jelly,” he said with a sigh.

“I’ll try, sir,” I said and I meant it.

“Now,” he said, his voice returning to his normal, albeit bossy, self. “I was calling about Jake’s birthday.”

“I was going to send him a card,” I mumbled, motioning to Adam that I would be another minute as he slipped back into my room.

Jake’s birthday was the twenty-eighth of January. I doubted he’d want to hear from me but I figured I really ought to send a card.

“It’s his twenty-first, Jelly, I think you can do a bit better than that,” he scolded.

“Jake hates me,” I moaned.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he reproached. “We’re all going up on the Saturday before. We’ll pick you up on the way.”

“But I’ll ruin Jake’s birthday if I’m there, Ian.”

“Don’t be stupid. We’re family, Jelly. Families are there for each other.”

I knew that was the end of the discussion. If I argued any further, I’d be risking pissing him off big time. Family was the highest priority for Carters.

“Can Jason come?” I asked as a thought occurred to me.

“Family only, Jelly. You know that.”

On all my brothers’ major birthdays, the eight of us always celebrated together, Elise didn’t even come. Matt did, but he really was a part of the family considering he’d been in it longer than I had. Even when they went drinking they usually took me with them. Elise used to come and pick me up when they moved from pubs to nightclubs.

“I know, but Ben lives in Newcastle. Jason might want to go visit him,” I explained.

“Fine,” Ian agreed. “We’ll pick you both up from yours at nine.”

“Okay, thank you.”

Ian stayed quiet for a few seconds, he started to speak but broke off. I wasn’t sure what to say.

“Jelly, if you need anything… we’re here, okay?” He offered tentatively.

“I know, thank you,” I said appreciatively. I knew everything that had happened with Duff lay on his conscious but it was over and done with now. I wanted to move on.

“Okay,” he said awkwardly. “Be good and enjoy your day off.”

He hung up and I breathed a sigh of relief.
That could have gone much worse
. I’d half expected him to order me back to revision but instead, it seemed I had his blessing. I smiled at his attempt to be nice and reassure me that they were there for me. I knew that they thought they’d failed me in some way because of what had happened, but it was nothing compared to the problems I’d been causing them since the day I was born.

“Everything okay?” Adam asked, standing up and wrapping his arm around my shoulder as we walked out the room.

“Yeah,” I nodded. “Ian wants me to go up to Newcastle for Jake’s birthday in two weeks.”

He gave me a sympathetic smile. He knew roughly what the situation between Jake and me was and he must have understood my reticence.

“Jason’s going though?” He tried to reassure me.

“If he wants to, but only for a lift to Newcastle. My brother’s big birthdays are always strictly family only.”

“At least he’ll be close by,” Adam smiled, opening the door to the common room.

That was true. If Jake really didn’t want me there then my brothers would have to accept it and I could go hide out with Jason and Ben. The thought reassured me and I relaxed a little.

That evening, we ordered takeaway and Jason decided to surprise me by appearing half way through a movie in the common room. I’d been regretting putting off seeing him until the next day so he was an extremely pleasant surprise.

I woke up when my flatmates started getting up from the sofa after the movie had finished. Jason had wrapped my crochet blanket around us and was stroking my back with me curled up, practically in his lap, like the pet cat of a comical super villain.

“Sorry,” I smiled as I crawled off his lap and stretched out. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you.”

“No need to be sorry,” he smiled. “You’re very adorable. We should probably get you to bed though.”

I yawned and nodded my approval. I let Jason guide me up to my room after hugging the others. I was beyond tired and found myself almost drifting off whilst standing as I lifted my arms to let Jason undress me.

“You still tired, baby?” He asked, brushing my cheek with his finger.

I nodded sleepily, too tired to form words.

“Let’s get you into bed then.” He lifted me up and placed me on the tiny bed, pulling the cover over me.

I watched through half-open eyes as he proceeded to undress himself before he slipped into bed beside me, wrapping his arm around my waist. My bed was so tiny that the only way we could sleep in it safely, without risk of rolling out, was if we lay very close together. Not that I was complaining.

“Sweet dreams, little squirrel,” he breathed against my hair before pressing gentle kisses against my hairline.

“You want to sleep?” I murmured, pressing my face into the nook between his chin and chest. A space that felt like it was made just for me; I fit so perfectly in there.

“No,” he breathed. “What I want to do is bury myself inside you and make you scream out my name,” he teased. “But you’re tired so I’ll have to wait until morning.”

I was suddenly feeling very much awake. My eyes snapped open and my heart rate increased rapidly.

“Oh,” I breathed, kissing his chest gently.

“Oh,” he teased. “Go to sleep, Jamie.”

“I’m not tired anymore,” I grinned.

“Tough luck,” Jason chuckled, squeezing me gently.

I could feel his erection pushed up against me and knew he was just bluffing.

“Okay, good night. I love you,” I smiled sweetly and turned over so I was lying on my other side, my back to his front. I heard Jason chuckle gently against the back of my head. He knew I was teasing him.

“Night, baby,” he said, brushing my hair away from my neck and pressing his lips to the sensitive skin.

I felt his tongue sliding over my neck as he nipped and kissed down to my collarbone. He brought his hand up from my waist and began teasing my nipples with his talented fingers. I arched my back automatically, pushing my breasts into his hands and my backside closer towards his crotch.

He tweaked my nipples sharply and I cried out, but he quickly soothed them again with gentle strokes, continuing to tease me and driving me crazy.
Two can play at that game
. I began grinding my backside against him, pushing up and down against the throbbing organ pressing against me. I felt Jason groan into the side of my neck.

“That’s it, no sleep,” he growled, flipping me over and pressing his weight on top of me as he pulled me into a deep, carnal kiss.

“Fine by me,” I breathed as he broke the kiss and his lips started trailing down my body.
More than fine by me
, I grinned to myself.

Chapter 5

Monday, 14th January 2013

I gladly accepted the omelette Jason had made me. It smelt amazing. I pushed a cup of tea towards him and shot him a gleeful smile.

“This is delicious,” I grinned at him. “You’re so good at cooking.”