How Milo had found him, Finn didn’t know, but the dog had been happy to see him, loping up the slip to the picnic table Finn was sitting on.
Finn roughhoused with him, but then he couldn’t get the dog to leave. As hard as he tried, Milo wouldn’t go home, and Finn had ended up throwing sticks into the river for him to fetch, which Milo did gleefully, over and over again, as Finn slowly moved him downstream to Laru’s.
Just as he knew eventually she would, Macy appeared on the back porch. She didn’t notice him as she walked down to the river’s edge. She moved stiffly, her eyes on the ground before her. Her appearance surprised Finn; she looked like her hair hadn’t seen a brush in days, and as she came closer, he saw a curious stain on the hem of the cropped Dallas Cowboys T-shirt she wore. She was also wearing some very short shorts, and Finn had a moment to admire her legs before she looked up and noticed him.
“Finn!” she cried.
“Hi, Macy,” he said, moving closer.
She stared at him wide-eyed, as if she were seeing a ghost. But then Milo emerged from the river and trotted to where she stood, dropped the stick, and shook the water from his coat. Macy squealed and did a funny little hop that Finn would have found endearing at one time. He realized he was too angry to be charmed.
She’d
sold
his
ranch.
Finn continued toward her, uncertain of what he would do or say, but wanting an explanation.
As he neared her, Macy dragged her hands through her hair. He could see the dark smudges under her eyes that indicated a lack of sleep. “What are you doing out here?” she asked, stepping closer to him. “You should have come to the house. Laru would love to see you, and I—You look great, Finn. Karen must be taking good care of you. I’m so happy to see you! I’ve been calling—did Karen tell you?”
“Yes.” He looked at the house, then at her. “I didn’t plan to stop,” he said. “I was out for a drive and thought I’d go see what was left of the ranch, but then I remembered—you
sold
it.”
The color drained from her face. “Did Brodie tell you that? It’s not sold! I asked Brodie not to tell you that!”
“A better question is why didn’t
you
tell me?”
“Why? Because it felt like piling on! Jesus, Finn, you’ve been through so much, and I knew the closing would be canceled so I didn’t see the point in even bringing it up. It’s still your ranch.”
“It was set to close?” he asked. “So you had it sold for all intents and purposes.”
Macy didn’t answer right away. “Well…yeah,” she admitted. “But I stopped the closing when we found out you were alive.” She smiled, as if that resolved everything. “That’s
good
news,” she added hopefully.
“How, Macy? You know better than anyone else how hard I worked to own that piece of land. You know the dreams I had for it.”
“Of course I do! But Finn…I didn’t think you were coming back. Don’t you see?”
“I get that. But you know what is sticking in my craw? You didn’t think I was dead very long before you began to shed me from your life.”
“That is
not
true!”
But Finn’s anger had been building the last few days, and it suddenly sparked. He grabbed Macy’s arm, forcing her up against the wide trunk of an old live oak tree. “You have no idea what it’s like to live day-today when the only thing keeping you alive is a dream of your wife, your land, your work. You have no idea what it’s like to come home and discover that even the
memory
of you has been left behind.”
“Do you think you’re the only one who knows what it’s like to be left behind?” she exclaimed. “I know what it’s like to be left behind. I know what it’s like to have your husband enlist, to beg him not to go, to plead with him to stay—for
our
sake—and then watch him march off to a war you don’t believe in and stand there and pretend to be a patriot when your heart is breaking and crying out for him to come back, to let someone else fight the damn war, to let someone else
die!
And I
know
,” she said, angrily shoving his chest with both hands and causing him to step back, “what it’s like to be left behind and try to keep a working ranch together that was supposed to run itself and have everything go wrong! I know what it’s like to have some guy in an army uniform show up and say,
We regret to inform you that your husband died on August eighteenth at fourteen hundred hours,
and when you wake up from the shock of that, you realize that he was so sure he’d come back, he never told you what to do with the life he left behind!”
A tear appeared and slipped out of the corner of her eye. “I don’t blame you for being angry,” she said, her voice softer. “I can’t begin to imagine the pain you’ve suffered. But I didn’t
shed
you. I didn’t even know who I was without you. I did the best I knew how to do, I swear to you I did. You have to stop punishing me.
Please
stop punishing me.
Please.
”
Something in her earnest voice wrapped around Finn’s heart. His soul had hardened to a big block of ice in three years. But his feelings for Macy had a way of breaking on that ice and melting it. He suddenly didn’t feel so furious; he felt numb.
“I can’t keep defending myself to everyone,” she said, her voice breaking. “I didn’t do anything maliciously. I couldn’t have prepared for this. And I don’t know what the answers are, even though God knows I have tried to figure it out. Do you remember when you told me why your ranch was named Two Wishes? That your grandfather said there was no such thing as one wish, because when one wish was spent, another one popped up to take its place? And when he wished for a ranch, another wish for horses popped up—”
“What does that have to do with us now?” Finn asked.
“I have two wishes,” she said tearfully. “I wish I could make you happy.” She touched his face. “But then I wish I could make Wyatt happy. He’s been good to me, Finn, and I want to make him happy, too. I love two men, but I can’t make them both happy. It’s impossible.” She lowered her head and pressed her fingers to her eyes.
Finn narrowed his gaze on her. “What about what is best for you, Macy? Have
you
thought of that?”
Macy opened her mouth to respond, but quickly shut it.
It was possible, Finn knew better than anyone, that she hadn’t even thought about what was best for her. He impulsively touched her cheek. “What would make you happy in all of this, baby?” he asked softly. “What do
you
want?”
“Don’t do that,” she muttered and tried to look away, but Finn caught her chin and forced her to look at him. “Let me help you out here,” he said low. “I think I know what you want, but I think you don’t know how to get there, or you’re afraid to admit it. Do you remember the first time we made love?”
She blushed. “Come on, Finn.”
“I remember it,” he said, ignoring her. “I remember it so often that sometimes, I can close my eyes and feel your skin against my cheek,” he said, letting his gaze roam her face, her curiously arousing mess of hair. “I think about it all the time,” he said, touching his finger to her lips. “It was incredible.”
Macy’s chest rose with her breath. Her eyes locked on his and she slowly leaned back against the tree.
“But you wouldn’t admit you wanted to make love, remember? You were afraid to want that for yourself,” he said, laying his hand against her collarbone and slowly sliding his fingers to her bare skin in the vee of her T-shirt.
“Stop,” she whispered, but Finn moved his hand to the smooth column of her neck and rested his thumb in the hollow of her throat. He felt her pulse leap at his touch and flutter rapidly.
Macy drew another rough breath.
“You were shy at first, but then you relaxed,” he continued quietly. “And your skin started to burn.” His hand slipped into her shirt, his fingers brushing against the swell of her breast. “When I pushed inside you, you were warm and wet.” He stepped closer, straddling her legs with his, delving deeper into her shirt, his fingers feeling the lace of her bra. “Your eyes were so blue, I could see the light in them. I could see how much you liked the way I was touching you.”
She drew her breath in a soft gasp. Her lips, wet and plump and enticing, parted. He bent his head, his mouth brushing across the corner of hers. “You were tight,” he whispered, “but you opened for me, Macy, because it was what you wanted. It made you happy.”
Macy closed her eyes.
Finn brushed his lips against hers again, sliding over them, touching the tip of his tongue to them. “Do you remember?” he whispered. “Do you remember riding that crest together?”
She began to quiver—from fear or restraint, he didn’t know, but he put his arm around her back and pulled her against him. Macy didn’t move, but when Finn slipped his tongue between her lips, she kissed him back.
She wanted him. She nipped at his lips, her chest filling with his breath, her breast pressing into him. Finn caressed her body, her breast, her face and ears, her arm, her hip.
He tried not to demand too much of her, tried to stay gentle, but it was almost impossible. His body was raging with need, his heart racing with hope he’d not felt in a very long time. That kiss, beneath the twisted boughs of an old live oak, took him back to a better, simpler time, when they’d been one. He could feel her body resonating against his. He could taste the salty path of tears that slid to the corner of her mouth, and the warmth of her breath.
And just as he began to believe that he could go home again, he heard someone call her name. It took Finn a moment to process the intrusion; it took Macy even longer. It sounded like Laru, and Finn felt a bit of apprehension.
“Macy, are you out there?” Laru called from somewhere on the back porch.
“Oh God,” Macy murmured.
“Wyatt’s here!” Laru called.
Macy looked at Finn. “Laru invited him over.” She put her hand against his face, ran her thumb over his lip.
Tension had built in Finn to the point he thought he was going to explode—he didn’t need any intrusions now. “You never said what would make you happy,” he said, ignoring Laru.
Her gaze flicked over his face; her hand slid to his chest. “
You,
Finn,” she said, her voice breaking with emotion. “It’s always been you.”
His heart skipped a beat. “What does that mean?”
She shook her head. “I don’t know.”
“Don’t go inside.”
“I have to,” she said. “I don’t want to disrespect him.”
“You can’t leave me hanging, baby.”
“I know, I know,” she said, squeezing her eyes shut a moment. “But I can’t leave him like this. Finn, I don’t have all the answers, but I know this with all my heart—I have never loved anyone the way I love you.”
“Macy, are you coming?” Laru shouted.
Macy peeked around the tree and looked up at the house, then at Finn.
She was going. Finn took her hand and kissed it, then stepped back. Neither of them spoke, but he felt a current of emotion and desire flowing between them.
“I love you,” she whispered, and stepped away.
Milo jumped up and followed Macy as she began the slow walk to the house.
Finn watched her until she stepped onto the covered porch and he couldn’t see her any longer, his heart beating hard with hope.
Wyatt was standing in the living room, a huge bouquet of flowers in his hand. “Hey,” he said, taking in Macy’s dishevelment when she came in through the back door. “Are you okay?”
“Fine!” She stuffed her hands in the pockets of her shorts. “Oh, you mean…you mean
this
?” she said, looking down at herself. “Yeah…I wasn’t expecting anyone today, and I was working, and I…I guess I didn’t get around to a shower.”
He didn’t say anything to that. “Hey, buddy!” he said happily, going down on his haunches to rub the coat of an ecstatically happy Milo, who Macy hadn’t realized had come in behind her. Wyatt was dressed nicely in black slacks and a turquoise polo shirt. He looked handsome, Macy thought. Strong and capable. He’d always appeared that way to her, as if he could hold the world on his shoulders if necessary, and honestly, there was a part of Macy that still wanted to melt into those capable arms.
Everything will be all right
. She’d melted so many times before when he’d said that.
He looked good. But then she thought of Finn on the back lawn.
Do you remember the first time we made love?
Wyatt looked up from the dog and smiled. “Milo!” Macy said. “You’re not supposed to be in here. Come on, out in the yard.” To Wyatt, she said, “Sorry, but I can’t keep him out of the river and Laru keeps threatening to make dog burgers.”
“Maybe y’all should come home with me,” Wyatt suggested with a wry smile.
Macy tried to smile, but she couldn’t manage it. She opened the door and shooed Milo out, then looked at the flowers Wyatt held. “Are those for me?”
“Actually, these are for Laru,” he said, holding them out to Macy. “For taking my phone calls. I forgot to give them to her when she let me in.”
Macy moved forward to take the flowers from him. But Wyatt misunderstood her intention and surprised her by kissing her. It was an awkward, clumsy kiss. She quickly took the flowers and put them between her and Wyatt. “I’ll put these in water.”
She walked into the kitchen to put some space between them, but Wyatt followed her. “So…” Wyatt said as she looked for a vase. “I’ve really missed you, sweetheart. I was thinking maybe we could grab a bite to eat and catch up. I can put those in water if you want to jump in the shower.”
No, no, she didn’t want to go out, she didn’t want to catch up. She wanted to crawl under bedcovers and hide from him. She couldn’t bear the thought of hurting him any more than she already had, so she methodically continued with the task of putting the flowers in water.
“Aren’t you going to say something?” Wyatt asked. “I’ll be right with you, or no, I’ll order a pizza, or…or, hey, how about this one? Wyatt, it is
so good
to see you.”
“I’m sorry,” she said instantly. “It is good to see you.” She put the vase down and smiled sheepishly. “But I don’t think I should go out.”
He blinked. His smile faded. “Look, Macy, I’m not going to pressure you. I’m not going to ask you how long this is going to go on, or what we’re doing, even though I am dying to know. I came out here because you are my wife and I miss you. Let’s go and get a bite to eat and talk about…about the big Project Lifeline fund-raiser. That’s not off-limits, is it? I saw Sam this afternoon and she filled me in on some of the stuff that’s been going on.”
He looked so hopeful. What could it hurt, really? In truth, Macy could use a break from Laru’s house. “Nothing fancy, okay?” she warned him. “Just a burger or something like that.”
“Whatever you want,” Wyatt said, his relief evident. He’d always said that to her, too—
whatever you want.
Wyatt Clark was a good guy. No matter what secret desires lay in her heart of hearts, he’d been really good to her and deserved her kindness and respect at such a difficult juncture in their lives.
Everything will be all right.
Macy smiled affectionately. “Give me thirty minutes. There’s beer in the fridge.” She walked past him and touched her fingers to his hand as she went.
A quick shower was all it took to transform Macy into a goddess. She looked fantastic in a summer dress and sandals. She’d tamed her hair; it was bouncing around her shoulders. Wyatt hoped he’d never taken her for granted, because that would have made him a fool. Dammit, he had a very pretty wife.
The sun was sliding toward the horizon in a sea of burnt orange. It was a gorgeous evening, the sort of evening that reminded Wyatt why he loved Texas. At least he’d won the battle for some decent food, and frankly, Macy looked a little wan. For the sake of keeping the evening relaxed and pleasant, he kept the conversation confined to work.
He asked her about the fund-raiser she’d been planning the past three months. She’d been stuffing envelopes, she said, and there was a big committee meeting late this week where they would approve the program. The event, to be held at the Salt Lick Barbeque outdoor venue, would have music and dancing, casino tables and a cash bar. For the kids there would be a petting zoo and big jumpers and artists to paint their faces and draw their pictures. Macy was going to be the evening’s host and preside over the silent auction for which they were collecting an array of great stuff.
Wyatt could imagine Macy hosting the event. She was charming and funny and everyone loved her. He was really proud of the work she’d done. When she’d first told him about the organization she and Sam wanted to create, he’d thought it was a huge undertaking and privately wondered if Macy really understood what she was getting into. But Macy and Sam were naturals at it. They’d gotten Project Lifeline off the ground fairly quickly and had gone straight to work lining up volunteer services. For the gala, they’d promised that one hundred percent of the proceeds would go to the families of the men and women who had given their lives in the war or were critically wounded.
Wyatt had given five grand to the effort, but with all the turmoil in their personal lives he’d lost track of the progress of the gala. He’d had coffee with Sam one night when she was closing up shop and she’d told him what was going on with the fund-raiser. But what Wyatt remembered most about that night was when he’d stood up to leave, Sam had said, “Sorry, Wyatt. I know how hard it is to feel like you’re losing someone.”
The remark had made him flinch. “I’m not losing anyone,” he’d said.
Sam had shrugged a little. “Look, if you ever need to talk…I’m here.”
Wyatt looked at Macy now. Was he losing her? He remembered their first date. She’d just gone back into social work, some really awful job with Child Protective Services that involved taking children from their homes. He thought it sounded dreary and depressing, but Macy had been passionate about it. She’d told him about a little girl who’d been neglected, and how smart she was, how she deserved everything the world could give her. Macy had truly believed she could make a difference.
That sentiment had astounded Wyatt. And it had moved him. He remembered thinking even then that he had to have this woman.
“Hey, are you remembering to take your blood pressure medicine?” Macy asked him. Wyatt had to think about it, which made Macy sigh and smile. “What am I going to do with you?” she asked with some affection.
“I don’t know…come home?”
She smiled. “What about your work? How’s it going?”
“Pretty good,” Wyatt said. The truth was that he didn’t know. Thank God for Linda Gail—she was keeping things on track for him, because Wyatt hadn’t been able to think about what he was doing. Funding for the Hill Country Resort and Spa was constantly on his mind. He didn’t have it cobbled together just yet, especially since he couldn’t rely on the sale of the Lockhart land, and his investors were getting antsy. He hoped Caroline would really sell and wasn’t just trying to get in his pants, and that Randy would really buy and wasn’t looking for some sweetheart deal. Frankly, he didn’t trust either one of them.
“Did you make the call?” Macy asked.
“The call?”
“You know…to cancel the closing on Finn’s ranch.”
He’d managed to survive the dinner by just enjoying Macy’s company and not hearing her say that man’s name. But just a mention of him was enough to bring the truth about Wyatt’s life crashing down on an otherwise pleasant evening, and he had to work to keep from popping off and saying something he’d regret. “Yeah,” he said, although it was a lie. It was the last thing on his mind, and he didn’t want to hear about it from Macy now.
Macy smiled with gratitude. “Thanks, Wyatt. I know how hard this must be for you. I really appreciate what you’re doing for Finn.”
That was enough to ruin what was left of the evening. Wyatt pulled out his wallet. “Let’s get out of here,” he said. He turned to signal the waiter and found David and Aurora Bernard walking toward them.
“Look who’s here!” David called out. “Good to see you two together. After all that news coverage, I thought you’d flown the coop, Macy,” he said jovially.
“Ah…” She looked at Wyatt.
Wyatt stood up. “Great to see you guys. We were just finishing up.”
“Don’t run off! I hear you’ve got some prime real estate you’re hoping to flip. And I’m not talking about the land,” David said with a wink.
At Wyatt’s puzzled look Aurora said, “I think he means Caroline Spalding?” She shifted her cool gaze to Macy. “Macy, you look so pretty tonight,” Aurora purred. “David, I think we interrupted a date.”
“No,” Macy said at the same moment Wyatt said, “Yes.” They looked at each other.
“Come on, won’t you have one drink?” David asked.
“Not tonight,” Wyatt said, and put his hand under Macy’s elbow, helping her to her feet.
David laughed as Aurora studied Macy from head to foot. “All right. I know when I’m not wanted. Tee time tomorrow morning at eight, Wyatt. Are you going to come?”
“Wouldn’t miss it,” Wyatt said. “Good night, David. Aurora.”
Aurora waved her fingers at them as Wyatt escorted Macy out of the restaurant.
Neither one of them said much on the ride back to Laru’s for a while. But then Macy said, “Caroline Spalding?”
“What of it?” he asked.
“Nothing,” Macy said. “I think she’s after you.”
“How can she be after me? I’m married,” he said irritably.
Macy snorted. “That never stopped Caroline. And Aurora would like nothing better.”
“Personally, I don’t give a damn what Aurora thinks, but if you do, living away from me isn’t helping matters.”
“What?” she said, turning in her seat a little to stare at him. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“It means, get off the damn dime,” he said angrily as he pulled up to Laru’s door.
“Wyatt—”
“No.”
“No?”
“I tried to do it, Macy,” he said. “From the moment you told me Finn was alive, I’ve tried to be supportive. I’ve stayed calm, I have given you the space you claim to need, but you know what? It’s been almost a week since you left, and in that week, I’ve had to struggle to get you on the phone, I haven’t seen you, and dammit, you even took my dog. So I came to you. And you balked at going out with me, and now you act like you can’t wait to get out of the car. Now, if we were just dating, I’d take the hint and you wouldn’t hear from me again. But we’re not dating, we are
married
. We need to file your divorce papers from Lockhart and get back to being a married couple.”
“Do I have a say?” she asked tightly.
He groaned with exasperation. “Look, how long is this going to go on? Because I’ll tell you right now, I don’t intend to live away from my wife and I want it straightened out.”
“I just asked for a little time. I’m sorry I couldn’t wrap up one of the greatest traumas of my life in a matter of days, Wyatt, but I couldn’t.”
“What the hell is there to wrap up? Either you file the divorce papers or the suit to declare our marriage void. One or the other, Macy.”
She didn’t say anything. He studied her a moment. Her expression was inscrutable—too inscrutable, too calm. “Have you seen him?” Wyatt asked bluntly.
There was a slight shift in her expression and she instantly shook her head. “No.” But Wyatt knew Macy, and his gaze narrowed slightly. She said again, “No,” but guiltily averted her gaze. “I’ve run into him a couple of times, but it’s not like I am
seeing
him.”
“What do you mean, you’ve run into him a couple of times?” Wyatt demanded. “I thought you were out here
thinking
and trying to decide what to do.”
“I
am
,” she said, glancing up at him again. “But he saw me at the gas station on the way out and stopped to say hello to Milo. It was just a few minutes.”
Wyatt waited, but Macy said nothing more. “You said a couple of times. When was the other time?”
She suddenly glared at him. “You know what, Wyatt? I don’t have to tell you or anyone else who I see or when or where.” She reached for the door handle.
He leaned across her and put his hand over hers. “I am your husband. Don’t I have a right to know?”
She sighed irritably and stared out the front window.
“You’ve left me, Macy. I’d be stupid not to ask if you are seeing him.”
Macy turned her head and looked at him, her eyes flicking over his face. “I am not
seeing
him. I have
seen
him, but I didn’t seek him out. Nevertheless, I…I don’t know that I want to divorce him, Wyatt.”
Stunned, Wyatt reared back. “You’re serious,” he said.
“I love you, Wyatt. But I love him, too. I always have.”
Those words cleaved him in two. Wyatt moved his hand to the nape of her neck, beneath her silky hair. “Listen, Macy. I am not going to beg you. If you want to be with Farmer Finn, then go.” He let go, reached across her, and opened the car door.
“Wyatt, let’s not end the night like this.”
“Go on, Macy. Do what you’ve got to do. But go.” He expected her to argue, to beg him for more time. But Macy got out of the car. Wyatt suddenly felt like he was going to hyperventilate.
Macy leaned down and looked inside the car. “Will you please try to understand, Wyatt? This is difficult for all of us.”