Sunder (25 page)

He was always saying the thing I was thinking, but this time I knew it was what I was thinking. His eyes turned red and his fangs dropped. He offered me his hand. We bit at the same moment. Suddenly I was dream walking again. I was the girl in the field. I was with him, holding his hand. He loved me and I loved him, and nothing else mattered.

Briton

In the corner of his eye he caught a glimpse of Simon standing. He was crying and gripping to Miles who was pulling them all away from where Briton and Liv lay.

Briton turned his face, seeing hers. She was human again. He reached his fingers across the grass to hers, clutching them tightly. The poison was paralyzing him. He could feel it. His grip on her small hand loosened. He fought harder for it. Tears leaked from her eyes. She shook her head, whispering, “I’m so sorry.”

He shook his head. “I’m not. I found you, finally.”

She shuddered as the venom took away her ability to hold his hand, but he held on tight enough for them both. He was lost in her blue eyes, forcing himself to watch them until they closed.

The cries and sobs of the people surrounding them filled the night air until it got cold and thick, and he wasn’t there in Wolfville anymore. He had been pulled away. He could smell the Icelandic air surrounding him. He had been pulled from where they lay in the grass to the past—to the moment where they had met, the first time, in Iceland.

She had been getting water. He had traveled with his father and sister, seeking a new place to settle.
Their home and small farm had been ravaged by the volcano there
.

When he first saw Liv, he didn't think she was real. She was so beautiful, so fresh and clean with her white hair and pale skin. She lit up the small river she was next to, like a magical creature from a tale.

She was stunning. When she saw him, she smiled, even though he was a stranger. She waved at his sister, who ran to where she was standing, waving away. His sister had been Liz. She was a
healer,
people always liked her right off.

The girls were best friends from that moment on. Liv’s father had been the leader of their people. He invited them to stay.

Briton’s vision jumped ahead by years to when he lay dying in the field, holding Liv’s hand.
He remembered the feel of his sister touching his chest, gripping to him. She cried and stabbed them both. His body jerked recalling the moment.

Never had two people been in as much love, or loved as much. His sister’s curse was a product of her love for them both.

Suddenly he was in Wolfville again, and he could feel Liz gripping to them in Betsy’s yard. It was the same scene only thousands of years apart.

Briton’s eyes fluttered. In the flashes he caught a glimpse of Ellie. Her steely-silver eyes were focused on him like she was trying to tell him something with a look. She rested a hand on Liz who was crying and gripping her hands on him and Liv.

Everything went dark and the feel of Liv’s cold hand in his was the last thing he saw or felt.

The black was there and then it wasn’t. Like his eyes were still fluttering.

The air got cold and turned white, too bright to see. Her hand was still there. He grasped harder, scared they would be separated in the blinding light. Her breath was ragged and her heartbeat rapid. He didn’t understand where they were. He could still feel the grass against his back.

He didn’t know which life he was in; they felt the same for a moment.

The light blaring down on them held a scream inside of it. The scream came with a flash of light and sound. It was there and then gone before he could even comprehended what had happened.

Were they in Heaven?

He heard a sob, assuming it was Liv, but all the light faded and it was dark again. He opened his eyes, gasping for air. Something horrid burned inside of him. There was a loud thump. It was like restarting an old clock. The first beat knocked the dust off of it.

He heard a scream
,
it was a man
.

The sound made his skin crawl. He looked around, seeing the faces of his loved ones looking down on him. Another scream tore through the air and he realized it was
him
. The searing pain was real, as was the silence of her heart. The rapid beating of her heart and the ragged breath had left her at some point and became part of him.

His body felt thick, trapped in a fog and heavy.

Could it be Hell?

Was he being punished for his many sins? He looked to the right. Liv was still there, but she didn’t move or breathe. He sat up, lifting her up into his arms. “Liv. Liv?” She was cold, cold as ice. The scream tore from his lips again as the drum continued to beat in his chest. She was gone, and yet, still owned every piece of his heart. He pressed his wet lips against
hers,
muttering into the embrace, “Please don’t go without me.”

He knew what it was. She still had her whole soul. She was pure. She was the light to his dark, in their complex love.

She was gone.

His eyes shut, refusing to see it.

He clung to her, tears running down his cheeks, his warm cheeks. She was burning him with the cold of her skin.

He felt someone touching him, saying something about how she was different. Her venom wasn’t the same.

He shook his head. How had he let her talk him into it? His venom had been potent and hers had been modified. He had murdered her and his payment for his many sins was to wait for her to be reborn again. But the beating in his once-still chest told him he wouldn’t have the lives he had once had. Something had happened. He was free of his blood lust. He was free of his darkness. She had taken it for him, freed him. He was mortal again for his sins.

He gripped to her, refusing to believe it, though the evidence lay right in his arms.

Liz who was sitting next to him, looked equally distraught. “Do something!” he demanded.

She shook her head. “I can’t. I don’t know what to do.” She sobbed into his shoulder, covering her face.

Ellie put her arms out. “Give her to me.”

He paused a moment, not sure what she would do. She nodded. “I can do this.”

He stood and laid her in Ellie’s outstretched arms. She closed her eyes and started to speak. Something came down from the sky, a star maybe. It was bright and when it was close to the roof, everything went white with it. The light was intense, too intense. It was the same as when she left him. He prayed she was back.

When the light cleared, there wasn’t a sound around them.

Ellie gave him a look, still holding the limp body of the person he needed the most in the world. Tears fell from Ellie’s cheeks. “What did we do?” she whispered.

He shook his head, covering his face and letting the shame and tears cover him.

Liv

The feeling of my heart stopping inside of me burned. Changing into a wolf was nothing, compared to the death I was suffering. I wanted so badly to scream, but I couldn’t, my lips lay still. I felt Ellie touching me, trying to make me wake, but nothing could pull me from the dream world I was stuck in.

There was no waking from this dream.

The pain was just there.

What had happened?

Had there been a choice about something? I recalled something.
A whisper on the wind, a voice that asked me to choose my form.
I remember thinking about him, wanting to be like him.

How had I been so brave as to choose to die with him?

It had to have been the
wolf,
she was braver than I was. She remembered things I didn’t.

I felt her leaving me. She took everything with her. She took my heart.

The last image I saw of him was his face, whispering something about there never being a kiss destined to something. He was beautiful and then he was gone. In fact, everything was gone. My mind blanked and I lost all sense of time.

I was still.

The light surrounded
me and my eyes opened
.

I looked around but nothing made sense.

I was
me
, and yet, I wasn’t. Who was I?

I was a girl. I was from somewhere. The place sat on my tongue, taunting me with words I didn’t know. I heard them but they didn’t register. I was naked except for a blanket I had wrapped around myself. I clutched to the blanket and tried to remember where I was.

Faces surrounded me. Everything blanked for half a second and then I smiled. “Liz!”

Her bright-silver eyes sparkled like stars in the sky. Tears leaked from them. Couldn’t she hear me? “Liz?”

She reached for me. “You’re okay?”

I nodded. “I think so. What happened?”

Her mom was there. Ellie. I remembered her.
There was something about the egg sandwich
,
I remembered that
. My mom came into view. She looked so different.
So old and haggard, and yet, alive.
My mom was alive? I leapt at her, hugging her. Her heart beat against my chest, echoing off the hollow walls of it. Her hands shook, gripping to me. I was sobbing without understanding it all. “You’re alive?”

She stroked my head. “I’m so sorry, baby. I am so sorry!” she whispered into my hair. I held her and my thin blanket tightly. “Where are Dad and Judith?”

She didn’t answer. My stomach sank. Were they okay? I couldn’t remember what had happened. I looked around at the grass and the people around me. Nothing made sense. There had been a crash and screams and the grass. I remembered feeling the grass. There was a hand.
A man’s hand.
“Where’s Josh?”

She stroked my head. “He’s safe.”

Liz was still crying. Was I hurt? I looked down at my
hands,
they were stained in blood and dirt. There had been an accident, but what was it again?

My body was panicking with my brain, but I didn’t have a response. I was still confused and lost.

I turned, seeing the most beautiful guy in the world. He gave me a hopeful look. I smiled politely, hoping my hair and face weren’t a complete disaster. “Hey.”

He scowled and nodded. His eyes glowed funny. They were the darkest blue I had ever seen, and yet, it was like a light came out from them. I could smell him. I could smell them all.

It was weird.

Had I hit my head? I lifted a hand to feel, clutching to my blanket with the other. I felt nothing but hair. I must not have hurt myself very bad.

But I had scared them all. I could see it on their faces, grief or maybe even terror, real terror.

The old man next to me dropped to his knees with a huge amount of effort. He took my hand in his. “What do you remember?” I knew him, somehow. He smiled softly. “Just start with the last things you remember.” He must be a doctor.
A friend of my dad’s?

I shook my head. “Chicago, but we moved here. I don’t know the name of the town. I know
Liz,
she’s my best friend. Her mom Ellie has that weird store with the weird sandwiches. I live with Dad and Judith. My mom died, but she’s here. Oh God. Am I dead too?” I started to get dizzy. “Was there an accident? Did I die?”

My mom shook her head. “No. Honey. I never died. It was not . . . uhm. I never died. I just left, to try to get better. I was in a coma.”

She was lying.

I backed away from her, moving closer to Liz. She was the only person I really trusted there. “Where’s Josh?”

The old man looked past me to the beautiful man. I glanced back at him. “Do you know where Josh is?”

He swallowed funny. “Why?”

I frowned. Yes, why? Why was I searching for Josh? I needed to find him. That was all there was. “Is he hurt?”

The man shook his head. “He’s fine. He’s sleeping, it’s night.”

I looked around. It was night. “What are we doing here? Why am I here? Why am I naked? Is this a dream? Where are my dad and Judith? Did I sleep walk? Is this a dream?” I pushed myself away from them all, scrambling to hold my blanket around my naked body. They looked really upset, but I didn’t care. Someone’s heart was racing but it wasn’t mine, oddly enough.

I looked at each of them, asking, “What happened?”

No one answered me. My not-so-dead mother didn’t even have an answer for me. They all stood there, looking lost.

“Fine, don’t tell me.” An ache burned through me. I clutched my chest, moaning and fighting for my breath. I struggled to my feet and started down the road. I wasn’t sure which way was home.

“Liv, wait.”

I shook my head. “Leave me alone, all of you.” I walked until I came to an old plantation-looking house I didn’t know but it felt like the right place. It was a massive white mansion.

I stopped. There was a wall around my brain and I couldn’t get over it. I dropped to my knees in the front yard of the house, just sitting there and staring at the house I didn’t know, and yet, knew better than any other.

I had the strangest feeling, like my heart was in that house.

Josh came out the front door. He looked rough, tired and groggy. Of course, this was Josh’s house. That’s why I knew it. I got up and ran to him. He wrapped his arm around me. “Are you okay?”

I nodded and then shook my head. I got lost for a second, feeling his heart beat against my chest walls. It echoed in my empty chest, like my mother’s had. I closed my eyes. “I think I’m having a very bad dream.” I looked up at him. “We’re dating, right?”

He cocked an eyebrow. “Uhhhh, no.”

I scowled. “Yes, we are. I remember us at that dance, dancing. I remember you at school. You had your arm around me.”

“Liv, trust me, we are not dating! Where is everyone else? Are you okay?”

I stumbled back from him. “I don’t know.”

His eyes widened. “You have no heartbeat? Are you dead? Are you a ghost?”

My lip started to tremble. “I don’t know. Do I look like one?”

”You look cold and tired. Why don’t you come inside, and we can see if you can get some memories back. Briton’s mom and dad are here. I just got here too. I woke at Ellie’s but no one was there.”

“LIV!”

A voice called me from behind. Josh’s face relaxed, seeing whoever was behind me. “Oh, thank God, Briton. She’s lost it, dude.”

I turned to see the beautiful guy from the scene of the crime I still didn’t recall.

He walked to me, searching my face with his eyes. “You don’t remember me at all?”

I shook my head. “Should I?”

Josh pointed at him. “This is your boyfriend. This is his house.”

My already-stopped heart felt frozen. How was he my boyfriend? How did I not remember him?

He gave me a heart-breaking look.

Josh slapped me on the shoulder. “I’ll give you guys some space.”

I realized then and there, I was standing on the deck of a house I didn’t know with two guys I didn’t really know, in a friggin’ blanket. I looked at the guy, Briton, and asked, “Can you walk me home? I can’t find my phone, and I don’t have clothes.”

He went inside and came back out with a sweater. He pulled it over my head for me. I struggled and got my arms inside without losing the blanket.

We started walking in awkward silence.

“Why did you think you and Josh were dating?”

I shook my head. “I don’t know. I just remember him. We danced at the ball, and he always was there at school, talking seriously. I guess I assumed.” I gave him a sideways look. “I’m sorry I don’t remember you.”

How could I not? He was stunning.

He shook his head. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stop what happened. Everything will probably be different now.”

I nodded. “I don’t even know what’s going on, but I think this is a bad dream.”

He gave me a weird look. “You don’t have a heartbeat.”

Josh had said the same thing. I paused, placing my hand on my chest. I fingered my neck, feeling for my pulse. I looked at him, scared and confused. “Am I dead?”

He shook his head. “No. We just had a weird night. Maybe it is just a bad dream. Maybe we’re both sleeping right now.” He reached over and placed his warm hand on my throat, feeling for the pulse. His touch was soothing. I didn’t know him, but his touch felt like he had been doing it my whole life. I didn’t know how that was possible, and yet was certain my body knew him. I felt it in the touch. It wasn’t a spark or lightning or anything amazing, just a regular touch.

He scowled. “Weird.” He leaned in, looking into my eyes. “Can you see really far away or smell things better than before?”

I glanced around, testing his questions. “I guess, yeah. I can hear better too. Like I can hear your heartbeat right now.”

“That is weird.”

We continued walking until we were outside of my house. I knew it was mine. I gave him a look when we got to the front door. “Thanks.”

He swallowed hard. He leaned in, brushing his lips against my cheek.
The closeness of his face next to mine was so familiar
,
I shuddered with a memory
. I whispered the first thing that came to my mind. “There never was a kiss destined to such an end.”

He reacted quickly, lifting his hand to my face, staring into my eyes like he was startled or scared. “What?”

I shook my head. “You remind me of something I heard once. There never was a kiss destined to such an end.”

A smile that made my broken heart
leap,
crossed his lips. “You remember me?”

I shook my head, but it didn’t stop his smile. He lowered his face to mine, pausing to rest his forehead against mine. “I love you, Liv.” He brushed his lips against mine. It was the most delicate kiss. All the fierceness in him was in his grip. He held me tightly to him, but still his lips gently caressed mine.