Surviving the Pain (A Baby Saved Me Series Book 1) (10 page)

With the shake of her head, she moved to the car and got in the driver’s seat. As she was buckling, she watched Sage and Hudson playing around in the back. The sound of Sage laughing brought back the past, memories that both hurt her and made her smile.

“Mommy! Daddy says that he’s going to be around more,” Hudson said excitedly as Sage made his way around the car and into the passenger seat.

Ember chose to keep her mouth shut. Anger was building inside her, and Hudson definitely didn’t deserve to be subjected to her irate mood. Actually, Ember wasn’t fully sure what she was angry about, she just knew she was. The entire drive back, she was quiet, listening to Sage and Hudson talk back and forth like they were old friends reuniting. Hudson had welcomed him freely into his life. There was no trial period, no anything. He just saw him and loved him immediately. Ember should be proud of the huge heart her son had, but she also knew the man. Well, at least what he’d done to her for five freaking years. He abandoned them, for crying out loud. Sage walked out of her life without looking back. He had five years… Five fucking years to contact her, to apologize, but he didn’t. Yes, she remembered what he had said about his life not being all that great and all that, but shit! He left her to deal with his psychotic parents. While she had an infant to care for to boot.

By the time they pulled into the parking lot of the apartments they had lived in, Ember was boiling with anger. She was angry at the whole damn world right now. So upset that it kept bringing tears to her eyes. So angry that when Sage spoke to her, she lashed out at him, thankfully they were both out of the car and Hudson still sat in the backseat. Hopefully, he couldn’t hear her fighting with his father.

“You live
here
?” He said it almost like it offended him.

Well, fuck him! “Yes, we do!” She yelled. “Unlike you, I’ve been raising a child and trying to finish high school. Then when I finally did finish, I had to pick up more hours at work so I could make ends meet. Most nights, I didn’t sleep, or I was so damn tired I would cry. Not to mention Hudson was colicky, so he barely slept and couldn’t handle to not be rocking. College,” she laughed. “I had to forget my dream of joining my father’s firm because I couldn’t work the hours I needed and still go to school. BECAUSE I WAS DOING IT ALL ON MY OWN!”

By the time she finished her rant, she was breathing hard, and her hands were shaking. Sage stood there and just stared at her. Without saying another word, he walked around Ember and got Hudson out of the car. Soon, his chatter filled the tension building between Ember and Sage. Thankfully in pure Hudson form, he was oblivious to any of that. He just felt the happiness from being with his father right now.

“…Jimmy at school is going to flip out when he knows that my dad is
the
Sage ‘Iron Fists’ Jacobs.” Ember heard Hudson say just as she walked into the apartment.

Another thing to mentally add to the ‘question him on’ list. Right now, though, it was time to get supper ready. She had to focus on their routine. She had to keep to that routine. It was what anchored her every single day. The one thing she could depend on.

“Hudson, do you have homework today?”

“Yeah,” he answered knowing where it was going.

“Then you need to go to the room and get it done. I’m starting supper. Go on. I’ll be there in a minute if you need help. Okay?”

He grumbled, but still turned and walked away and down to his room. Ember busied herself in the kitchen as she pulled out all the things she needed for dinner. Tonight she planned for a roasted chicken, with steamed vegetables and baked potatoes. She’d have to make enough for one more person since she now had a surprise visitor. Sage hadn’t made a sound since they walked in. When she looked over her shoulder, she saw him tracing a picture with his finger, a sad look playing on his face. When he finally spoke, Ember jumped slightly.

“They give homework in Kindergarten now?”

“He’s in the third grade.” She answered shortly.

“But he’s only five,” Sage stated, sounding shocked.

“Yes, I’m aware of that. I gave birth to him.” She snapped as she turned around to face him. Sage’s face filled with even more sadness and a bit of loss too.

He dropped his head before looking back up to meet her gaze. “I know. I’m sorry. I’m just shocked is all.”

Sighing, Ember turned back around to finish chopping vegetables. “When I took him into Headstart, they had tested him to be sure he was ready to start. He tested off the charts. Mom and Dad said it’s because I’m a great mother, but I’m not sure about that. Regardless, there was a meeting held and a few other school board members and me sat in a room talking about his academics and it was then decided that a private school for gifted children would probably be his best and safest bet. Kids are so mean these days. So, he has most of his tuition paid for, but there’s still about twelve hundred dollars a year that I have to come up with. Which is really nothing compared to the amount that it costs to go there. I’ll do anything to make sure he has the best life, so it was the easiest decision.”

“He’s an incredible kid,” he finally said as she was putting the chicken in the oven. The vegetables were already going in the steamer her parents had gotten her, and the baked potatoes had already been in the oven about ten minutes prior. “Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant, Ems. That day in the club, why didn’t you say anything?”

Whirling around in the middle of drying her hands, her mouth dropped open. “Are you serious? I searched for you for nineteen weeks because
you
quit contacting me! My father cashed in favors to help me find you! When I do, you tell me you just used me for sex and that you never wanted me. Why the hell would I tell you about my son when you just ripped out my heart?”

“He’s my son too, Ember,” he hissed at her. “You kept him from me for five years and want to act as if I was never around.”

“You weren’t!” She screamed. “You had no contact with me until he was two! Two, Sage! When he turned four, I told him all about you. However, the only thing I never told him was the hurt and pain you caused. How you walked away from me with no regrets, no problems. I didn’t tell him how broken I’ve been and how damn lonely! Don’t stand there and act like you are some kind of victim here! You had choices! You had chances! You could have been here for your son. I get it, you don’t want me…”

His eyes widened just as Hudson walked in. “Are you fighting?”

“No, baby. Why would you think that?”

“Well, I never hear you cuss for one. For two, you’re crying.”

Wiping the tears from her cheeks, she knelt down in front him. “It’s just hard on me seeing your daddy after so long. I’m okay. Are you doing okay on your homework?” she asked in hopes of changing the subject.

“Yeah, I’ve just got to read a super boring book that will take me less than a day to finish by the end of the week. Can I wait to do that so I can spend time with Daddy?”

Nodding her head, she swallowed hard. “Sure, honey. I believe that’s the sole reason he came here was to spend time with you.”

Running over to his father, he tugged him down to his room. Sage looked back at her, but she turned away before her tears started again. Moving back to the kitchen, she checked the potatoes, turning them, and then set the table. Just as she finished, there was a knock at her door. Ember went stiff as a board. Slowly, she made her way to the door and peeked through the peephole. Sighing with relief, she unlocked the door and opened it.

“Grey, I’ve told you to call before you show up. You know what it does to me.”

“Sorry,” Grey said as he stepped into the apartment. It was then he saw three places set for dinner. “Are you expecting someone?”

She could easily lie about it, but what was the point in that. Ember would eventually slip up because she wasn’t a liar. Taking a deep breath, she knew this wasn’t going to go well.

“Actually, it’s funny you ask.” She forced an awkward laugh. “Sage actually came back. He met Hudson, and now Hudson won’t let him go.”

“You let that prick around my son,” he hissed. “Are you fucking him too?”

Before she could stop herself, she slapped him hard across the face. His head snapped to the side with the hit. When he looked at her, she could see the hand print she left on his cheek. She was shocked, however, when she saw the tears dancing in his eyes.

“How dare you! I just saw him today! I accidently drove to my parents to pick
my
son up and forgot he was in the car. Second, he is
not
your son. He’s…”

“He’s my son,” Sage said in a firm voice from behind me. Ember squealed as she jumped in fright.

“Sage,” she worked hard to get her body under control. “How long have you been there?”

“Long enough to know that the man that I thought was my best friend wasn’t and is trying to claim what’s mine,” Sage hissed as he stalked toward Grey.

“What’s yours? You left them in your dust a long time ago,” Grey hissed back.

“You don’t want to press your luck with me right now, Grey. I’ll lay all your shit and lies bare.”

“Will both of you, stop it now! I don’t need my son witnessing your pissing contest,” Ember growled in frustration.

Sage
stepped backwards a bit and grabbed Ember’s waist, taking her with him. Grey had been the one person that he’d trust his world with whenever he couldn’t be there. Grey obviously wasn’t that man anymore. Truth be told, Sage didn’t know who Grey was anymore. But one thing he did know for certain. Ember and Hudson were his, they would never be anyone else’s as long as Sage lived and could help it. No doubt in his mind that he fucked up five years ago, but he was damn sure not letting another moment pass by him that he didn’t try his damnedest to make it up to Ember and to his son. This was his family, the family they’d always talked about having. He wasn’t letting them go again.

“I’m sorry Ems,” Sage whispered near her ear before impulsively pressing a tender kiss to the curve of her neck. He’d realized his mistake when she tensed in his arms. It was slight. No one would have noticed, but he did. By the small smirk on Grey’s face, he did too. Grinding his teeth together, he worked hard to keep from just ripping into the douchebag.

Putting her hands on her hips, she stepped away from Sage and looked between him and Grey. Sage already missed the feel of her near him. It was weird how much time had passed, and these feelings had not changed, not in the slightest. Well, that wasn’t true. The feelings he had for her may have increased, but definitely didn’t diminish.

“You two used to be best friends. Hell, there were times when I couldn’t get you two apart long enough to even say your name, Sage. Why the hell do you hate each other so much? Why damn it! I want to know!” Ember’s cheeks still turned the slight pink when she got angry. The memory almost made him smile, but he held out. If he’d smiled right then, she’d have taken it wrong, and all hell would have broken loose.

“Ask him,” Sage said after a moment. “I turned to him as my friend and he is the one that broke that. He’s the one that… Never mind. It’s not important. The fact of the matter is that I’m still paying for a wrong decision that I made when I was young, dumb, and in a terrible living environment. A decision that never even involved him, other than I asked that he look out for you until I could come back.”

“Had nothing to do with me,” Grey hissed as he started to step toward Sage. “You asked something of me that I told you, I couldn’t do. I told you that I didn’t want to do it, and yet you still asked, begged even. You said you only trusted me,” Grey growled.

There was a long silence after he finished talking. Sage wasn’t sure if Grey was thinking back to what he said and realized how horrible he sounded or not, but Sage was. Not that Grey sounded awful, but that he’d put a problem on a friend’s shoulder, and he shouldn’t have. Sage created this problem, whatever the problem was. Sage somehow needed to fix it, but looking back and forth between Grey and Ember, he wasn’t sure he could fix this.

“You need to leave,” Ember said suddenly, shocking both of the guys.

“Who,” Sage and Grey said in unison.

“Grey, you need to leave. I’m not going to sit here and fight an uphill battle until I know where all the landmines are. There’s obviously more going on here than I am aware of. So until I know it all. You need to leave.”

“Wait, you are kicking me out. I’ve been here for you through everything, including the birth of Hudson,” he smirked at Sage as he said that. He knew that knowing he was there for the birth of
Sage’s
son would eat at him.
The bastard!
“You’re going to kick me out when that fucker hasn’t been in your life for anything, none of the attacks…”

That got his attention, but before he could say anything Ember was in his face. As she yelled each word at him, Sage watched Grey cringe and actually felt sorry for him. No matter the standing between this crazy love triangle that seemed to be happening right now, Grey definitely loved his woman. The question still remained for Sage on if Ember returned those feelings. He was going to find out, but he had to wait until he’d earned the right to ask.

“You weren’t there for everything! There’s a lot you missed. No one saved me in the parking lot. Holden is the one that came to my rescue when Hudson and I were here in this apartment! Don’t try and play like you were here for everything. Yes, you’ve been here through a lot, I won’t deny that, and I’m very grateful. Don’t get on your high horse when you don’t have a saddle on it to keep you up there when it bucks.”