Sweet Savage Heart (35 page)

“When I left the Lakota lands long ago, if you hadn’t been a little girl I would have stolen you and taken you along with me,” he teased to lighten the gloom around them. “You see, Miss Michaels, I’ve been nothing but trouble to myself and others since I was born. Now do you understand why I said you’d be glad you weren’t joined to a jinxed renegade like me? If not for your grandfather, I’d be worse than I am. By now, the Hunkpapas have reached your camp and Lone Wolf has probably learned what he will believe to be the black truth about me. I wouldn’t be surprised if he sends a band of warriors to hunt me down and rescue you. I was determined you were going home with Nate, even if I had to carry you hog-tied and screaming every mile of the way. That’s where you belong for lots of reasons, including your survival. I swear I tried to honor my promise to Lone Wolf and Nate about you, but you found my weak spot and captivated me.”

Travis waited for her to say something, but she just kept staring at him with those liquid blue eyes that he could not read. He prayed she wasn’t sorry about last night. “I’ll make a deal with you, Rana. If you decide to reject me for any reason, I’ll leave the ranch and never come back, if that’s what it’ll take for you to remain with Nate. He turned my life around and gave me everything I needed. Seeing him happy means a lot to me. Adopted son or not, I swear I won’t make any claim on the ranch. It’s rightfully yours. I wouldn’t want you to think I was trying to hold on to it by ensnaring you. I know I deceived you in the Oglala camp and I’ve broken my word about staying clear of you, so I guess you have little reason to trust me. But, please, make sure you know what you want and what you’re doing.”

Beyond Travis, Rana could see Nathan approaching and knew there would be no time or privacy to express her feelings. She realized how much Travis loved and respected Nathan. She was certain he had never begged anyone for anything before today, and his willingness to risk and sacrifice so much for Nathan touched her deeply. Travis had just shown her the path by which she could force him to marry her. It would be easy for her to demand that he marry her in order to be allowed to remain with Nathan and the ranch, but in her heart she knew she could not walk such a path. He had been tormented and betrayed too many times, and it would be a grave mistake for her to use any kind of coercion to win him. As he had said, he needed time and understanding. For Nathan’s benefit, she declared aloud to Travis, “You said you would replace Cloud. Do you have a white stallion on the ranch?”

For a moment Travis was baffled by her question and behavior; then Nathan called out, “You two ready to ride?”

Rana smiled at her grandfather and nodded. “I’m eager to get home, Grandfather. I’m tired of riding and camping. Travis has promised to give me a horse as special as Cloud.” Her gaze met Travis’s as she spoke words that carried a dual meaning. “I will hold him to his words.”

“If Travis said it, Rana, you can believe him. Sometimes he’s a little hard to live with, but he’s the best man I’ve ever met. I don’t know what I would have done all those years if he hadn’t been with me.”

“You’re biased, Nate,” Travis teased in return, wondering which words she was going to hold him to. To Rana he said, “Let’s go before he gets mushy on us.” He grinned at her then, letting his eyes say far more to her than “thank-you” for the way she was treating Nathan.

When they reached the Fort Cobb Agency, again Travis left them camped nearby while he scouted the conditions in the area. He had not been gone ten minutes before Rana began questioning Nathan about this mysterious, enchanting man with whom she believed her destiny was entwined.

When Nathan discovered that Travis had divulged part of his past to Rana, he assumed it would be all right for him to reveal more facts to her. After all, he decided, they would be living together in the same house. Too, he had dreams of bringing these two young people together, for he could not imagine a better match for either one. He sensed they were being drawn to each other, and that pleased him, though he had no doubt their attraction intimidated the carefree Travis, who had a history of bad luck with women.

Nathan related what he knew about Travis’s experiences with the Hunkpapas and described the incident that had brought him and Travis Kincade together, including details of Elizabeth Lowry’s treacherous role in their meeting. He was not surprised when Rana asked for more information about the two women who had caused Travis to display such a grim attitude toward the female sex. As Travis had instructed, he avoided an explanation of Travis’s relationship with Clarissa Caldwell, for Travis had felt she might drop innocent, though dangerous, clues to Harrison and his daughter when they eventually met.

Nathan and Rana discussed Travis’s life in the Hunkpapa camp and on the ranch. Clearly she was fascinated by his adopted son. When finally they had exhausted the subject of Travis Kincade temporarily, Nathan saw the perfect opportunity to relate more information about Rana’s father.

“Why did my mother marry such a wicked man?” she probed after listening intently to Nathan’s words.

“I wish I knew, child. I guess love is one of those
mysteries of life. Sometimes we don’t use wisdom to pick the person we love. I remember when I first saw my darling Ruth,” he murmured dreamily. “She was the prettiest girl I had ever laid eyes on. I couldn’t think about anything until she was mine. Whenever I left on a roundup or cattle drive, I couldn’t wait to get back home to my Ruthie. I hated for us to be separated, especially for months at a time. I wish you could have known your grandmother, Rana. If she hadn’t died so young, your mother would have had someone to keep her straight. I should have remarried, ‘cause I didn’t know much about raising little girls. Sometimes it’s hard to believe they’re both gone forever,” he mused dejectedly.

As Rana touched his arm and smiled comfortingly at him, Nathan ventured, “Maybe how I felt about Ruthie was how my Marissa felt about your father. It’s a shame he was so bad. All he wanted was my ranch and money; that’s why he married her. Some men are just plain greedy and evil, and they’ll do anything to innocent young girls to get what they want. I tried to keep her from marrying him. I begged her to marry Todd Raines; she had been seeing him for a few months and had seemed to like him. I guess I was wrong about their feelings. She told me she didn’t want to marry a poor wrangler. She knew I would have made Todd my partner if they’d married, so that wasn’t the real reason she refused his proposal. She just up and ran off with that fancy gambler and crushed poor Todd’s heart. If she hadn’t, she would be alive today. And if Travis hadn’t come along, Todd would have his place in my life now. He’s still real special to me.” He paused for a moment, lost in thought. “If Travis had been around, Marissa wouldn’t have looked at another man. ‘Course the marriage wasn’t all bad.” Nathan beamed as his eyes washed over Rana. “They had you, my precious little Rana. Lord knows I wouldn’t take anything for you. I’m so glad I got you back.”

“So am I, Grandfather,” she agreed, then kissed his cheek.

Nathan declared that it was time he took a nap in order to be ready for his guard duty later that night, and as he settled into sleep, Rana watched him with deep affection. She noticed the way the dappled sunlight filtered through the trees and illuminated his blond and silver hair. His skin was leathered and lined from age and exposure to the elements, but he was still a striking man. She recalled how his gray-blue eyes filled with warmth and love and glowed with happiness each time his gaze settled on her, and she was glad fate had returned her to her family. This older man needed her sunshine in his life, sunshine that she was determined to provide for the rest of his days.

Rana had come to realize that he and Travis were right about her having no future in the Oglala lands, but she ached over the hardships she knew her adopted people would endure. Yet, as Travis had told her, there was nothing she could do to keep the Lakotas from their destiny except suffer and die along with them, which would have been her fate if she had insisted on remaining in the Dakota Territory. She hoped she could return one day to visit them, especially Lone Wolf and Myeerah. She would pray for their survival and hope they could change with the times as she had, as she was determined she would.

She was looking forward to her new life on the ranch and to winning the heart of Travis Kincade, for he warmed her soul with a strange radiance that could only be love. As she considered Travis in this light, speculations about her parents invaded her thoughts. How she wished she had known them, or could remember them. Her lack or loss of memory made her feel that something special was missing from her life. But she knew that if she worked hard, Nathan Crandall and
Travis Kincade could fill the void.

Rana was giving Travis more thought than she had ever given anything in her life. She knew they could offer each other more than a physical attraction, and she prayed he would recognize that truth and surrender to it, as she was doing. They could make a good pair—fighting, working, living, and loving, side by side. She understood that his luck with women had been bad, but that could change if he would only allow it. He was skittish and wary. She needed to be patient with him, to show him she was not like those other women, who had used and hurt him. She didn’t want him to feel trapped, or to claim her out of guilt.

She envisioned his handsome body, which had been scarred by so many troubles. Worse, his heart had been scarred deeply as well. His enticing body, though healed, would always carry reminders of those tragic events, but his heart could recover if he permitted her to tend it with the medicine of love. He had not expected to become entangled with her. She dreamily recalled their passionate night together, which had made her long to share many more. Perhaps he had confessed more than he had intended that night and now regretted his candor. At least she was confident that she was not in competition with another woman, dead or alive. But, she asked herself, which would be easier to battle, a real woman or painful ghosts from his past? Still, with these facts in her possession, she could understand him and better plan her winning strategy…

Later that night, while Travis was taking his watch, he attempted to force his thoughts from the girl who was sleeping by the campfire, for she was a powerful distraction. He could not forget how she had smiled at him upon his return that evening. She had laughed and
chatted with Nathan, and with him. All afternoon he had been eager to get back to camp just to be near her, and his body had ached for hers then, as it did now. He truly enjoyed talking with her, looking at her. Her smile warmed him all over, and her voice made him quiver. He could think of nothing more pleasant than holding her in his arms while they shared their innermost secrets and desires, unless, of course, it was making love to her. Yet, he couldn’t move too swiftly with her, or she might think he wanted more from her than her love. He had to be careful around her, for they couldn’t carry on a secret affair under Nathan’s nose; that would have been wrong.

He had never seriously considered marriage before meeting her; now he thought about it constantly. She was causing him to experience a wide range of emotions, filling his head with hopes and dreams. And it seemed he was having the same effect on her. Was she as scared as he was about making a permanent commitment to another person? Was she just as afraid to trust him completely and risk total surrender? Would it make a difference to her, now or later, that he was a “despicable half-breed"? What if she met and wanted another man after they reached home? What if she craved a wild life, as her mother had? That would break Nathan’s heart, and his too, if he allowed it. He had been independent for so long before taking on the responsibility of Nathan Crandall; now he was seriously considering adding Rana Michaels to his list of priorities, if she permitted him to do so. First, he had to make certain that this was what he wanted and needed, and she would have to do the same. She could win any man she set her sights on, and he wanted her sights on him! Where was that willful, defiant, arrogant girl others had described? How had she changed so quickly, so completely? It had taken him years! Whatever decision he made about Nathan’s granddaughter, it would be a permanent one, and he
vowed it would be made wisely and cautiously, and with her agreement.

In less than a week they would reach home. He would have to give her time to adjust to her new life and to the people in it. He would have to let her find herself, and he prayed she would also come to understand him. He could not get it out of his mind that they were joined, yet he was very much aware that if he staked a claim on her, he would have to be ready to back it up with a white man’s marriage. In her camp, she had not wanted to marry because the cost would have been her freedom, which she prized so highly. In her new life, she could have both, whether or not her choice of a mate included him. Lord help them all if she was only seeking amusement or revenge on him. No, he refuted mentally, his Rana would never do that.

Feeling somewhat more confident, he stood and stretched, then left the campfire to scout the surrounding area.

Rana rolled to her back and sighed restively as her talks with Nathan swirled inside her head to inspire bad dreams. The black-haired man was chasing her again and spewing forth threats and crude language. For a time, all she could do was watch the terrifying action, but suddenly his words became clear. He was shouting, “You’re the lowest kind of woman alive! You didn’t care whose bed you crawled into, just so you got yourself diddled good. I know all about that bastard and the woods colt he sired. You mess with me, woman, and I’ll tell everyone your foul secret. That little piece of information is worth a fortune, and you’re gonna get it for me. You don’t want your pa or that kid learning what a wicked slut you are. If I told what I know, your old man wouldn’t give you a nickel and he would take that kid away from you. You ain’t fit for nothing but giving men pleasure and earning money to keep my mouth shut. You
try anything foolish and it’s all over.”