Sweet Seduction Shield (19 page)

"Jason," Gen
complained. "Stop winding her up."

"But it's so
much fun, sis," he shot back with a wink.

The men
chuckled unanimously, all receiving very stern glares from both
Kelly and Genevieve.

"Anyway,"
Kelly finally said, "it's not all about me." Her hand lifted and
she waved in our general direction. "It's about the two raunchy
lovebirds who practically set the Cherry Tree on fire in the
backyard."

Oh, and here I
was thinking we'd dodged a bullet with the tangent they'd all gone
off on.

"So, what's
the story?" Nick asked, from his seated position at the table.

"Well," Kelly
started, about to launch into some debauched tale, no doubt.

Nick held up
his hand for the woman to stop. Her mouth snapped shut a little
petulantly.

"Pierce?" Nick
pressed. "Where are we officially at now?"

I felt his
chest rise as he sucked in a steadying breath behind me, and then
the fall as he slowly released it. Hot air tickled the skin at the
base of my head and I struggled, despite the current topic shift,
not to react to the tingles Ryan's proximity created.

"Marie has a
ledger that details all of McLaren's criminal transactions, debts
owed, and how they were paid, over the ten years prior to Richard
Costello's death."

Silence met
Pierce's announcement and for the first time I realised that this
decision had another consequence too. One I hadn't even considered
until this moment.

The chance
that all these people, whom I'd begun to feel like close friends,
could turn away in disgust, once they heard what I had done and the
reason why.

I wasn't to
blame for where Rick took us, but I hadn't tried hard enough to
stop him until it was too late. And my attempt had left him dead in
the end, letting McLaren walk away.

How many
crimes had McLaren performed since? How many people had been harmed
because I hadn't succeeded, because I'd remained quiet for fear of
my daughter's and my safety?

What would
they think?

It was Abi who
spoke first.

"A ledger?"
she asked softly. Ben pulled her closer, a shadow passing over his
face. "How did you get it?"

And there it
was. The question that would reveal everything. That would reveal
who I really am.

My mouth was
dry, my throat was threatening to close. I think I was about to be
sick.

"Marie?" Abi
asked, and I wanted to run.

Daisy.

"Hey," a voice
said softly from beside me. "Just breathe, Tiger. You can do it.
I'm right here."

By the time I
opened my eyes again the room had practically emptied. All that was
left, was Abi, Ben and Nick. As well Ryan, holding me in his lap as
he sat at the table and forced me to breathe.

"That's it,"
he encouraged with a sad smile. "In, out. And again."

I stared into
his beautiful coffee coloured eyes and anchored myself to the man
before me. Let him lead me back to the present. Let him keep me
safe.

My breathing
steadied, as his arms wrapped tighter around me and he tucked my
head under his chin, against his chest.

"Do you want
to try that again, Abi?" Pierce said, a note of warning in his
tone.

"Yeah," she
shot back, steel coating her tongue.

A chair
shifted beside us, a scrape as its legs dragged over the wooden
floor. Then Abi appeared in my vision, sitting herself down and
turning to face me.

I tried not to
hold my breath, not so soon after my last panic attack. But I
couldn't help it. I liked Abi. I didn't want to go here with her
and lose what we'd gained.

She offered a
small smile, straightened her shoulders and said, "Marie. You are
no longer alone."

I blinked.
Pierce stiffened, but it was more from shock or surprise than
anything else.

And then Abi
said, "Let me tell you a little story. It's about as fucked up as
it can get. But there's a happy ending, and lots of courage, and
moments of enormous amounts of fear." She took a deep breath in and
then exhaled. "But, sweetie, there's a light at the end that is
blinding, and if you just trust us, we'll help you get there."

And then she
talked, and the tears flowed as I listened to a young woman's tale
about running for her life. About standing up to the bullies, when
she feared for her safety and the safety of those she loved and
cared for. About redemption and forgiveness. A father's sacrifice,
a daughter's promise. About love and protection, and the
possibility of a world filled with hope, covered in light,
banishing shadows forever.

About trust
and friendship.

About the fact
that Daisy and I were never going to be alone ever again.

About... love.
The love I felt whenever I walked into a room filled with these
people. The glimpse of love I'd seen in Ryan's eyes, felt in his
touch, heard in his promise of protection.

Just about
beautiful, multifaceted, all encompassing, sometimes challenging...
love.

"I'm not sure
I'm the right person for you to be talking to," the lawyer,
Dominic, said. "You do realise my area of expertise is family and
property law, not criminal?"

I sat, back
stiff, on the couch in Abi and Ben's lounge, my heart in my throat,
my head pounding. My aches and bruises magnified somehow just by
the topic we were discussing: My possession of a document that
described multiple criminal activities.

There was no
way to spin this in a good light, and I didn't even know this well
dressed imposing figure sitting before me. Maybe it was better he
was a stranger, but then even though my interactions with Genevieve
had been minor, she could hardly be called a stranger anymore. And
Dominic was her fiancé.

"I understand
that," Pierce said from my side, also sitting on the couch, "but
you can offer advice and what you're not sure of, you could find
out." The entire statement was a challenge. Pierce spoke to this
lawyer as though he knew exactly what would make him tick. I
guessed the fact that Genevieve and Dominic were here at all, meant
that Pierce knew them in some capacity. But the way he interacted
with this guy led me to believe he knew him pretty well.

Was that a
good thing or not?

"Ryan, this is
a serious legal quagmire," Dominic pointed out. "Beside the fact
that there could be information inside the document that
compromises Marie..."

"There's not,"
I interrupted, and then felt my cheeks warm when both men turned
their attention to me. "Well," I said, thinking I needed to
elaborate, "there is mention of Rick and he was my husband, but I
never had anything to do with Roan McLaren."

There was
something in Pierce's gaze I struggled to determine. I think it was
surprise or shock, but also something else. Maybe he was angry I
had let him believe the ledger was condemning for me as well as
Rick. But the opportunity to explain had never come up. Hell, I'd
only just told him about the blasted book.

"Well, that's
a good thing. One less obstacle to tackle," Dominic pointed out.
"But there's always the fact that you held onto the book. Clearly
you understood what was inside it, therefore legally you had a
responsibility to hand it over to the Police."

"She couldn't
plead ignorance?" Pierce asked, finally taking his intense gaze
away from me.

"She was
married to someone who, from all accounts, was openly involved in a
drug lord's activities." Dominic shook his head, and then directed
his next question to me. "What exactly did your husband do for
McLaren?"

I couldn't
stop the tremors that snaked up my arms, tingled in my hands, sent
my back rigid. I'd never openly discussed Rick's involvement in
that world. He and I argued over it. Constantly. But I'd
never
told another person. A natural born
instinct of self preservation. Talking about it could only ever
lead down a very nasty path.

Even now,
knowing McLaren was behind bars. Aware that Pierce was trying to
protect me. I had to battle the urge to clam up. Silence had been
my protector. Confidence my shield to hide behind. Together both
had meant our survival; Daisy's and mine.

I stared at
the man sitting opposite me, then flicked a gaze towards Pierce. It
was time to stop shielding. Time to face up to what Rick was and
who he did it all for.

He sure as
hell didn't do it for me.

Pierce reached
over and grasped my shaking hand, offering warmth, a soft squeeze
of reassurance, letting me know I wasn't alone anymore. I held his
gaze for the longest time, then forced myself to turn and look at
Dominic.

"He handled
McLaren's accounts. His books and financials." I sucked in a deep
breath and added, "He helped him hide money offshore, evade tax,
and launder his profits."

So much to be
embarrassed by. So much to make me feel shame. Rick had never
pulled the trigger on a gun, but his crimes were just as
heinous.

My hand came up and covered my mouth, the need to let a sob
out was too great. I'd enabled Rick. I'd argued and fought over
what he was doing, but in the end I still let him do it. I'd loved
him. So, I'd buried my head in the sand, gone off to my staid,
boring,
legal
job, while he cavorted
with criminals, maximising McLaren's coffers, allowing the drug
lord to do more harm.

McLaren became
a very rich man because of my husband, but in the end even the
money Rick had made him, couldn't save his life.

Dominic sat
back in his chair and sighed. "It's quite simple, Pierce. She'd be
considered an accomplice, regardless of her hands remaining clean.
She knew what her husband was doing and for whom, she even had the
evidence of some of his crimes in her possession. But she never did
a thing to thwart it. Guilty by association and inaction. She could
even be considered guilty of perverting the course of justice. It's
a bit of a long shot, but with the right judge and a determined
Crown Prosecutor, she could be charged and sentenced
accordingly."

I leaned
forward and placed my head in my hands, trying to still the nausea
that rolled through me. I'd stolen the ledger to do just that,
thwart Roan McLaren, stop Rick's involvement. My intentions had
been noble, but I hadn't been able to follow through with them.
McLaren killing Rick in front of me had been a good enough message
to halt me in my tracks.

I'd never
given the ledger back, I'd lied that it had been destroyed. Rick
had backed me up, even going so far as to say he'd been the one to
do it. Impulsive reaction to seeing it on our bed at our home. But
it wasn't destroyed, it was just hidden. Waiting for what?

I lifted my
eyes to the lawyer, held his gaze, let him see my regret, my guilt,
but also my desperation. I didn't ask for any of this. And maybe it
was all my fault, but now I had no choice in the matter. Now I
either ran and continued to let myself down, to let the memory of
Rick down. To let my beautiful daughter down. Or I...

What? Give
myself up along with the ledger? Sacrifice my freedom, making sure
Pierce saw to Daisy's safety from here on in? Is that what it had
all come to?

"Fuck,"
Dominic suddenly muttered. "This is screwed up."

"We forget the
ledger," Pierce said resolutely, making me suck in a breath of
surprised air and Dominic simply gape at the man, as though he
thought he'd gone mad.

"That's not
who you are, Ryan," Dominic said very slowly and very carefully.
Realising just how close to the edge Pierce was.

Ryan shook his
head and stood up, starting to pace across the far side of the
room.

"No, Dom. It's
exactly who I am." His deep bottomless brown eyes came up to look
at me. "Handing over that ledger doesn't bring justice," he said
softly. "It might be what the law requires, but it is not
just."

Dominic swore
again and threw up his hands in defeat. "I can't help you if you
walk this path. In fact, I should just leave now so I don't hear
anything else." He stood up smoothly from his chair, but didn't
walk out. Just stood there and stared at Pierce. "Look," he added,
"I get that Marie did what she needed to do to survive. Nobody
would doubt the fact that she needed to run from McLaren after
witnessing her husband's death. I understand it. But you know as
well as I, Ryan, that is not always enough to convince a jury and
judge. Law is not justice."

Law is not
justice.
Even a lawyer used that
phrase.

"I won't put
her through this. We contain it here and now," Pierce vowed.

"Nick will
back you. ASI won't divulge a thing. And you know Gen and Kelly
will do what you ask, they consider you part of the family."

"And Harvey
left before we heard about the ledger," Pierce offered. I wondered
who Harvey was. But he'd obviously been here earlier and now was
gone, and he was clearly not part of ASI or a friend. Maybe a
partner? Another detective?

"So, that's
your choice?" Dominic asked. Pierce nodded. Both men let out long
breaths of air. "Good luck, then," Dominic murmured, shook his head
and then walked out of the door without a backwards glance.

Silence
wrapped around us, thick and uneasy. Weighted in lies and
deception, and the criminal filth that was McLaren's mark.

This was
wrong. I knew it with all my heart, that it was the wrong thing to
do. But I couldn't deny a part of me was relieved, and utterly
blown over by Pierce's fierce position on all of this. By the fact
that I remained out of the spotlight, free not arrested. Able to
care for my daughter and not have her visit me behind bars.

Daisy's safety
was always forefront in my mind. If the ledger remained missing and
my association with it forgotten, then I had a better chance of
keeping Daisy safe and happy.