Sweetest Mistake (Nolan Brothers #2) (26 page)

“Taking care of the baby is the easy part.” He eased his hold on her neck. “It’s rough at first, but once you figure them out, it’s not so bad.”

She shot up. “How do you know that? Do you have kids?”

“Don’t you think I would’ve mentioned if I had kids? I’m an uncle, and I lived with my brother and his wife until their firstborn was five years old.”

“Oh.” But the panic had taken hold of her. Her eyes glistened. “I can’t do this. I was a caretaker for nine years. I’m not ready to do it again.”

He pushed her head between her legs again. “Keep breathing.”

“I
can’t
go through that again.”

“It’s not the same thing.”

She bolted upright. “It is—”

He took her hands between his and tugged so that she met his gaze. “No. Watching a baby grow bigger, stronger, brighter every day is not the same thing as watching someone you love die. It just isn’t.”

Tears welled. “I don’t think I can do this.”

Her panic didn’t bother him. Indeed, he was happy to see it. It meant she’d be a good mom.

“You can,” he said. “You will. It’s going to be okay.”

“How do you know that?” Her voice broke over the words.

“It’s a baby, and a baby is never a bad thing.”

That pierced the fog of her panic. “Wh-what’s the hard part?”

He wrestled with her question a moment.

“You said the b-baby’s the easy part. Wh-what’s the hard part?”

A shiver of unease rippled through him. He shrugged. “Us.”

She blinked at him and he could see the gears of her mind working. “Omigod, we’re stuck with each other. For the rest of our lives. We’ll never be rid of one another.”

“That’s not exactly what I—”

“We’ll always have to know each other. We’ll have to see each other, like, every day.”

A satisfied calm spread through him. “Yes, we will.”

“We’ll have to watch each other date other people. M-marry other people. Have b-babies with other people.”

His good mood vanished.

“Why aren’t you freaking out about this?” Her shrill voice echoed around the small space.

He gripped her hand again. “Because we got this. Trust me.”

“I broke the egg.” She bit her lip on the outburst.

“You what?”

“The egg. In high school. You know, the class where they make you carry it around for a week? I broke it.”

He gaped at her a moment. “That’s… I mean, it’s an egg—”

“Omigod, I’m going to kill our baby.” She bent over, tucking her head between her own legs.

He smoothed a hand over her back. “You’re not going to kill our baby.”

She jerked upright. “How do you know that?” Her voice reached shrill heights.

“Because I won’t let you. We’ll do it together.”

Her eyes gripped his, as if he were her only life raft in a raging sea.

She swallowed with difficulty. “Luke?”

“What is it, sweetheart?”

“I think I’m going to be sick.”

Sleep eluded him. Tucked into his side, Emily slept, her soft snores tickling over the bare skin under his arm.

Restless, he left her bed and padded into the dark kitchen. At the off chance she’d stashed a bottle of whiskey somewhere, he searched her cupboards. He let a cupboard door fall shut and turned.

And startled.

Noah and Mina sat at the kitchen island, twin bowls on the counter before them.

Noah finished chewing and swallowed. “Lose something?”

Luke’s gaze slipped to the box of cereal between them on the counter. “My Cocoa Puffs.” He filched a bowl and a spoon from the cupboard and plopped onto a stool. He snatched the box away and filled his bowl.

Mina slid the milk jug across to him. “Is Emily, um, sleeping?”

“Yep.” He crunched on a spoonful of chocolate balls.

He could practically feel her mind gnawing on a thought thread. The cousins had much in common. Loud minds and faces that gave away their every thought and emotion.

She tried to catch Noah’s eye.

Noah ignored her.

She set down her spoon and clasped her hands together. “So, Luke, you and Emily—”

“Are getting married.” The words slipped from him like smooth whiskey.

“
What?
” Dual expressions of incredulity gaped at him.

Luke didn’t bother to take offense.

“She didn’t say anything to me,” Mina said, her mouth screwing into a frown.

Noah was less tactful. “Did she actually agree to marry you?”

Luke sniffed. “I haven’t told her yet.” She needed a little time to adjust before he moved forward with his plan.

“
Told
her?” Mina’s jaw hung open. “What if she says no?”

His heart hammered against his breastbone. “She won’t.”

Luke’s gaze slid to Noah. Explanations floated through his mind, but nothing emerged that didn’t sound barbaric. The brothers stared.

The fact was, Luke wouldn’t leave Emily on her own to raise their child. Nor would he leave the parenting of his child up to whatever man she decided to marry one day in the future. Statistics had a lot to say about stepdads and their stepchildren. He wouldn’t risk her moving out of town, out of state, out of the fucking country, and taking his kid with her.

And he sure as shit wouldn’t leave his child to face the cruelties of this godforsaken world alone, without their dad around to defend them.

Not. Fucking. Happening.

“You’re sure about this?” Noah asked quietly.

Mina gasped. “Noah, I don’t think—”

“I’m sure,” Luke said, and he was. It was the perfect arrangement for all involved.

For once, doing the right thing was also the easy thing.

Noah leaned back and a broad smile split his face. “All right then. When’s the party?”

“Noah!”

“Who am I to interfere with true love?”

“I’m not saying we should interfere, but marriage? Marriage is so…” Mina’s hand moved in front of her face, as if she might pluck the word out of the air. “Permanent.”

Noah’s mouth twisted with a wry smile. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

Stammering, Mina blushed an attractive shade of pink. “Of course not, it’s just…”

Noah planted a kiss on her mouth. “We can’t do a thing about it, baby. He’s determined.”

A broad grin split Luke’s face. “Thank you, brother.”

Mina scowled. “I’m not done arguing about this.”

Noah lifted his shoulders. “How can I deny him wedded bliss? It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

She visibly melted. “That’s not fair.”

Noah grinned and shot Luke a glittering glance. “Are you taking notes?”

“I taught you everything you know,” Luke said around a mouthful of cereal.

Mina’s serious round eyes swung to Luke. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I think we ought to wait until Emily is, uh, informed of her impending engagement before we book the church. If she doesn’t agree—”

A cold dread started in Luke’s chest and snaked through his veins like a dark taint. “She will.”

“You may be right,” she said. “But if she says no—”

His heart banged around in his chest and he stood abruptly. At the sink, he rinsed his bowl. “She won’t say no.”

He planned to make her an offer she couldn’t refuse.

Emily’s chest ached from the battering of her heart against her breastbone. While Luke slept, she lay wide awake in the darkened room as the 3:00 a.m. hour ticked away.

A baby.

A week since she’d taken that pregnancy test, she still couldn’t wrap her brain around this new reality.

She’d never done anything so big, so critically important, as bear full responsibility for a tiny, helpless person. With certainty, she knew she would mess it up, as she knew absolutely nothing about how to be a mom.

She reached for her phone to call her mom, only to remember her mom was dead.

She had to do this by herself. A bead of sweat broke out on her brow and her hand trembled when she returned her phone to the bedside table.

Panic choked the breath from her lungs and the peace from her heart, as if she were trapped on a roller coaster and could do nothing to change her fate except hold on and pray for the ride to end.

Light from the stained-glass lamp by the front door threw a soft glow into the room and allowed her to make out Luke’s features. His mouth was slack and his hair rumpled, his bare chest rising and falling with his deep, even breaths. She couldn’t recall ever before seeing him sleep. The notch on her heart ached.

Luke’s baby.

Would they have a boy or a girl? Would he or she be awkward like her mother, or charming and generous like her dad? Would she stutter?

Beneath the bruise on her heart, a tiny seed of wonder sprouted.

A baby. Someone she’d love forever and always, with the whole of her heart. A family.

She’d never been one of those girls to pine for a baby. The mere thought struck terror in her. But after living so long with impending death, the hope of new life was irresistible.

Luke stirred and his hand smoothed over her stomach. “What’s wrong? You all right?”

She squeezed his forearm. “I’m all right. Just restless.”

“Want me to distract you?” His voice was groggy with sleep and suggestiveness.

“Your distractions get us into trouble.”

“Can’t really get into any more trouble than we already are, now can we?”

The laughter that came so easily around him trickled from her.

They let the quiet fall between them.

Until he pressed two fingers to the spot between her eyebrows. “What’s this?”

She wanted to fall into his arms and let his warmth melt away all her worries. It was a ludicrous thought, so she rubbed her forehead, as though to erase the lines of worry there.

“How did y-you know?”

Green eyes landed on her face, searching out the meaning of her question.

He lifted one shoulder. “You’d been sick for a while, and I remember when Isobel was pregnant, she had strange aversions. Strong smells would set her off, and there was this one song that made her ill every time she heard it.”

Biting her lip, she ducked her chin. “I made a doctors’ appointment.”

He propped up on his elbow and peered down at her. “That’s good.”

She folded and unfolded one corner of the sheet. “It’s not until next month, if you want to come… But y-you don’t have to come if you don’t w-want to,” she rushed to add. “I don’t think anything too exciting will be happening. Yet.”

“I’ll be there,” he said softly.

In the troubled silence, he reached out to toy with a strand of hair at her temple. “I think we should get married.”

She sucked in a sharp hiss of air and whipped her head around. The soft light threw shadows across his face, obstructing her study of his features.