Sweetness (Bold As Love) (14 page)

“
You don’t blame yourself, do you,” I ask concerned.

“
I did. Sometimes I still do.”

I turn around in his arms and place a hand on his cheek. He leans into my hand and closes his eyes. “You can’t think that. You didn’t kill her. Her cancer took her. Not you. It’s not your fault. She probably wouldn’t have wanted you there when it happened anyway.”

A tear falls from his closed eye and I wipe it away. He leans his forehead against mine and I wrap my arms around him in a hug. I wait for him to open his eyes and after a few minutes he does. He gives me a soft kiss and says, “Thanks. Now let’s enjoy this view, before we have to leave.”

He turns me around and replaces his chin on my shoulder. We stand in comfortable silence and I feel closer to him than I did before. It says something when you can stand in silence with someone and be content with it. I lift his hand from my waist and look at his watch. It was a quarter to ten. Wow. Time just flew by.

“
We should probably head home,” I whisper, not wanting that at all.

“
Just a few more minutes,” Jake says into my neck kissing it softly. I lean into him relishing the feeling of the security he gave me. Jake continues to adorn my neck with soft kisses that don’t last long enough.

“
C’mon. I don’t want to upset Mike already,” he says with a small smile. I let him walk me down the pier, down the steps, and onto the beach. “This has been perfect,” I tell him. He smiles at me and I feel the flame inside me start up again.

“
It has, hasn’t it?”

I wrap my arm around his and hug it to me keeping our fingers interlocked. Too soon, we reach the walkway that leads to Jake’s car and we walk over the sand dunes leaving the beach behind. Jake opens the door for me and I get in. My eyes follow him as he walks around the front and to his side of the car. Once he is inside and with the ignition on, I turn on the heat not realizing how cold it was without Jake’s body heat.

I take his hand and hold it in my lap as we ride home. Every now and then, I kiss his hand or his knuckles. He would repeat the action on me each time I did so. I started to do it more frequently to see if he would keep going. He did and when he caught on to my game, he glanced over at me and chuckled firmly planting our hands against his chest.

I giggle and try to bring them back to me, but his grip won’t allow me to budge our hands. “Jake,” I fake a whine.

“
Emily,” he says in the same tone. I can’t help but laugh. I let it go since part of my arm is resting against his strong chest. With a sigh, we pull up at my house. Jake chuckles but gets out opening my door. He walks me to the door and pulls me to him. “I had a fantastic time,” he tells me.

“
Me too,” I say a little dizzy from the heat radiating from his body. I stand on my tiptoes and give him a short and sweet kiss since the living room light is still on.

“
I’ll probably come by Sunday. The guys want to hang out, so I figured I might as well before they start hounding me. If you want to come over tomorrow night, let me know and I’ll be here.”

I felt a twinge of disappointment at not seeing him tomorrow. He had become a regular occurrence in my everyday life. “Okay. Good night Jake and thanks for tonight.”

He smiles and gives me another kiss. “Thank
you.
Sweet dreams Emily.” I open the door and go inside. I lock the door behind me knowing that dad would ask me to anyway. Dad is sitting on the couch and turns to look at me when I come in. “How was it?”

“
Great.” I walk up to the back of the couch and lean down to kiss him on the cheek. “I’m going to bed.”

“
Okay honey. I’ll check on you before I leave tomorrow.”

I nod and say good night. I go to my room, closing the door behind me. I lean on the door and take a deep breath. A smile plays on my lips as I push off the door, change into pajamas and crawl into bed.

I wake up tangled in my covers. I bolt upright and try to get them off of me even though I’m freezing. I run to the bathroom and promptly throw up. Oh gosh. I felt
horrible
. I brush my teeth and see that I’m pasty looking. My eyes look a little puffy and my hair is stuck to my neck.

How was that? I’m cold, not hot. I grabbed a hair bow and threw my hair up to keep it from getting in the way in case I threw up again. I dragged my feet to my bed and fell on it. I covered up and was soon back to sleep.

The next time I woke, light was shining through the blinds and I immediately ran to the bathroom. I was vomiting when I heard my dad come in. “Emily?” I flush the toilet, wipe the water that fell from my eyes, and rinse out my mouth. Not having the energy to brush them.

“
Are you okay?”

I look at my dad and try to smile. “Just sick I guess.”

He comes to me and places the back of his hand on my forehead. His eyebrows crease in concern. “You’re burning up honey.”

“
I’m fine. Go to work.” I was
not
fine. My stomach ached and I was still cold.

“
Honey, I can make arrangements to stay here with you.”

I shook my head. “I’ll be fine. Go. It’s just a little bug.” When I see him hesitate, I take a hold of his shoulders and turn him around. “I’ll be fine Dad.”

“
Okay. I’ll check in on you, okay?”

“
Alright.” My dad looks unsure, but I make a motion with my hand to shoo him out. He goes. I go into my bathroom, pick up the empty trash can that has a bag sitting inside. I go back into my room, grab my pillow, and comforter. I slowly make my way to the couch and get comfortable.

I find the remote, say goodbye to my dad after he brings me something for the fever, and turn on the TV. I snuggle under my covers and soon I’m asleep. Sleep doesn’t last but an hour before I wake up.

Between throwing up and feeling achy, I sleep. This wasn’t exactly how I planned to spend my Saturday. Around noon, I’m watching Dirty Dancing when I hear a knock on the door. “Go away,” I yell. The knock comes again and I groan. I get up to answer the door with my comforter wrapped around me.

I open the door to see Jake and I groan again. I look just as bad as I feel and he shows up! He smiles and asks to come in. I move aside and go back to lie down. “What are you doing here?”

“
I’m happy to see you too.”

I roll my eyes and feel the urge to throw up again. I lurch forward and make it just as I’m over the trashcan. Great. Jake gets to see my vomit. The taste is disgusting in my mouth. I pick up the trashcan and go into the kitchen. Jake follows me. “So?” I ask waiting. I take the bag out of the little trash can and tie it. I open the door leading to the garage and drop it into the trash can in there.

“
Mike called and told me you were sick. He wanted me to check on you.”

A groan escapes again and I go to the fridge to grab a water. I drink until the taste leaves my mouth. I look Jake up and down. He looks good in his sweats and black tee. I look down at myself. My pajama pants are pink covered with penguins and my tank top is black. Thank goodness, there is a built in sports bra.

Jake takes a step towards me and pushes away a loose strand of hair. “You look fine,” he says.

Again, I roll my eyes. “Yeah, I’m sure I do. You don’t have to be here. Plus you are supposed to be with the guys,” I remind him walking back into the living room. I sit up on the couch and wrap my blanket around me.

Jake takes a seat beside me, putting my pillow in his lap. “Oh, they can wait. You’re sick Em. I have to nurse you back to health.”

He stands up and goes into the kitchen. I rubbed my hands over my face and returned my focus to the movie. I hear Jake rummaging through the kitchen but I don’t feel like finding out what he’s doing. A few minutes later, he returns with a steamy bowl of chicken noodle soup. “Jake, I really don’t want that,” I say.

He sits down beside me and gives me a look that tells me I will eat this. “Emily, it’ll make you feel better.” I look between him and the bowl. I reach out to take it and a grin settles on Jake’s face. I let the steam travel over my face. Slowly, I eat my soup. After I finish, I can’t tell if I feel better or more nauseous. Jake takes my bowl and I drink some more water.

He comes back and places my pillow in his lap. “lie down and rest,” he commands me. I do as he says with pleasure. All I want to do is lay down. Jake slips his hand under my comforter and runs his hand up and down my arm. Soon, sleep takes over.

Jake

Emily’s body is extra warm as she sleeps. When Mike called and told me she was sick, there was no doubt that I wouldn’t come over. Seeing her when she opened the door, I could tell she didn’t feel good. I kind of liked her sick. She has a grumpy side to her, which I like. It makes me smile to see her like that.

She rolls over and buries her face in my stomach. I move my hand to rub her back. While she sleeps, I watch the rest of Dirty Dancing. I’m afraid I’ll wake her if I reach to the coffee table for the remote. Another older movie comes on. When that movie ends, Emily wakes up. She clamps a hand over her mouth and runs for the bathroom. Ah, she forgot to bring the trashcan back in here.

I follow her and check on her. After she rinses out her mouth, she looks at me and says, “Fever means it could be contagious. Are you sure you want to be here instead of with your friends?”

I bring her to me and kiss her forehead. “Absolutely.” We walk back into the living room and I ask her where the grocery bags are so I can replace it and bring her the trash can.

I walk into the kitchen and open the cabinet beneath the sink. I place the bag in the trashcan and go back to my seat. Before she lies down again, I grab the remote. “Thanks,” she says when I place the can in front of her. I take my seat and place her pillow over my legs. She lies down and brings her covers up to her neck.

I run my hand up and down her arm again. I find George Lopez on and turn it to his show. It doesn’t take long before Emily is asleep again. Even though she’s sick, she looks peaceful while she sleeps. Her dark eyelashes stand out on her tan skin. My focus switches from the TV to Emily. I use my other hand to trace the outline of her face.

I couldn’t help it. Her skin is softer than any other person I’ve ever touched. I could trail my fingers over her skin all day and be happy. It was that soft. She grumbled and rolled over to bury her face in my stomach again. I move my hand from her arm to her back. I push the hair that’s stuck on her face back. Seeing her like this, I realized I was in love with her.

I smiled at the realization. She was mine and I intended to keep it that way. She might be unsure of herself sometimes, but she was amazing. Emily was letting go more and more each day of what her mother said to her. She was beginning to trust herself and me. I wouldn’t let her down either. It would break my heart to see her go back to being withdrawn.

I had seen her laugh, smile, and twirl in the rain. Emily was full of life, just like Mike said. I always wanted to see her that way. Her smile brings a smile to my lips every time. Knowing that sometimes, I’m the one who caused it makes me even happier.

At the sound of the door opening, I turn my head to see Mike come in. He gives a slight smile and takes a seat in the recliner. “How’s she doing?”

“
She’s been sleeping mostly. I got her to eat some chicken noodle soup but she probably threw that back up.”

He nods and then seems to notice that her head is in my lap. He doesn’t comment on it though. Mike stands up and walks over to us. He places a hand between my stomach and her forehead to check for a fever. “She doesn’t seem as hot as earlier,” he comments as he goes to sit back down. “Thanks for checking on her,” he adds.

“
No problem.” Emily stirs and rolls onto her back opening her eyes. I smile at her and get one in return. “How are you feeling,” I ask her.

“
A little better.”

I lean down and kiss her forehead.

“
Have you taken more medicine for your fever,” Mike asks. Emily sits up, just noticing him and shakes her head. He walks down the hall to the bathroom. She rests her head on me and I wrap an arm around her. She gives me an apologetic look. “Em, don’t look at me like that.” Mike comes back and holds the medicine out to her. She takes it and downs it with water. Emily leans back and rests on me.

Her comforter keeps slipping down so I tuck the ends behind her shoulders so it stays in place. “Thanks Jake,” she says. I answer her with a kiss on the top of her head. She sighs, “Hopefully, this is a twenty-four hour kind of thing.”

I chuckle and say, “Hopefully.”

After a few minutes, she lays back down. “Wouldn’t you be more comfortable in your bed,” Mike asks her.

Emily yawns and says, “Probably, but unless you’re going to let Jake go back there, this will have to do.”

He seems to consider it when Emily lurches and pukes into the waiting trash can. Mike takes one look at her and says, “If that will make you more comfortable, then okay.”

Emily drinks some water and asks for more. I get up and get it for her. Emily stands, takes her pillow, and heads to her room. With the water bottle in hand, I follow her. I leave the door open, because there’s no reason to close it. Emily has already plopped into bed and I set the water on her nightstand. I walk to the other side of the bed, slip off my shoes, and crawl in beside her. She holds up her comforter so I can slide under it and to her.