Table of Contents
WHAT IS LOVE?
RHIANNON
My life could not possibly suck more than it does right now.
I try not to cry.
And to let it go.
I don’t want to be this totally depressed person, with a heart so broken it hurts every time I breathe.
I still love Steve. And here’s the worst part.
I want him back.
NICOLE
Danny was my first real boyfriend. He just came right up to me with his cute smile and customized Vans and his yellow rubber bracelet that says MOMENT OF ZEN and his radical attitude and picked me to be with out of everyone else.
And it was great at first. But then there was that night. So I had to break up with him. I couldn’t deal with it then and I still can’t deal with it now.
JAMES
I don’t like the way he’s looking at her. And I definitely don’t like the way he said, “If you ever feel like hanging out . . .”
Whatever. It’s her life. I don’t know why, but it’s like I go into this hyper protective bodyguard mode whenever some dude tries to hit on Rhiannon.
“Oh,” Keith goes. “Are you two . . .?”
“No!” Rhiannon yells. “We’re just friends.”
Dude. Why’d she have to yell like that? Is the thought of us together so horrendous? I mean, it’s not like I want to be with her, but jeez.
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Susane Colasanti
SPEAK
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Registered Offices: Penguin Books Ltd, 80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL, England
First published in the United States of America by Viking,
a division of Penguin Young Readers Group, 2008
Published by Speak, an imprint of Penguin Group (USA) Inc., 2009
Copyright © Susane Colasanti, 2008 All rights reserved
The lines from “i carry your heart with me (i carry it in”. Copyright 1952, © 1980, 1991 by the Trustees for
E. E. Cummings Trust, from
Complete Poems
: 1904-1962 by E. E. Cummings, edited by George J. Firmage.
Used by permission of Liveright Publishing Corporation. The lines from “Rebel” copyright © 2004
by Tatyana Fatima Cabrera. All rights reserved. Used by permission of Tatyana Fatima Cabrera.
THE LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA
Colasanti, Susane.
Take me there / by Susane Colasanti.
p. cm.
Summary: Three New York high school students try to sort out their emotions as they deal
with relationships, crushes, their families, and planning for the future.
[1. Interpersonal relations—Fiction. 2. High schools—Fiction. 3. Schools—Fiction.
4. Dating (Social customs)—Fiction. 5. Emotional problems—Fiction. 6. New York (N.Y.)—Fiction.] I. Title.
PZ7.C6699Tak 2008
[Fic]—dc22
2007037119
eISBN : 978-1-101-16281-1
PUBLISHER’S NOTE
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product
of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons,
living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
The publisher does not have any control over and does not assume
any responsibility for author or third-party Web sites or their content.
http://us.penguingroup.com
FOR PIERRE,
who proves that true love
is something real.
Acknowledgements
FINDING MY WAY
into the light would not have been possible without the guidance and encouragement of the phenomenal support team at Viking Children’s Books. Anne Rivers Gunton, my spectacular editor, has an incredible talent for shaping a story until it sparkles brighter than I ever imagined. Your patience and dedication are invaluable. Regina Hayes is an amazing source of inspiration. Thank you so much for believing in me. Sam Kim created an absolutely gorgeous cover and Nico Medina is the best copy editor ever. You guys rock.
I would also like to thank my agent, Gillian MacKenzie, for her determination and attention to detail. Can’t wait to hear the soundtrack.
My life would be a darker world without these contributions of glowing genius. Authors Laurie Halse Anderson, Blake Nelson, Judy Blume, and S. E. Hinton have sparked an eternal flame with their brilliance. All of my students over the past decade have challenged and influenced me in countless ways. The fascinating Tatyana Cabrera let me share her fierce talent with the world. And Jonathan Rubinstein created a neighborhood coffeehouse that always feels like home.
My friends are the most dazzling family I could ever hope for. I would be lost without all of you. Laila, your awesome daily e-mails of encouragement kept the fire burning. Allison, you increased the luminosity of all those mornings.
Intense thanks to Pierre, for being my number-one fan and totally devoted to taking excellent care of me. You give me the strength to keep going. Feel the gluons.
To everyone who reads this book, infinite thank-yous. You are pure sunlight to me.
PART ONE
May 20-23
To move the world, we must first move ourselves.
—Socrates
RHIANNON
CHAPTER 1
Saturday
MY LIFE COULD
not possibly suck more than it does right now.
I try not to cry.
And to let it go.
I don’t want to be this totally depressed person, with a heart so broken it hurts every time I breathe.
I still love him. And here’s the worst part.
I want him back.
The homework pile on my desk is laughing at my pain.
I’m not laughing with you,
it says.
I’m laughing at you. You pathetic idiot.
The homework pile is right. I am pathetic. I am an idiot.
I vaguely remember remnants of my normal life. They’re like a dream. These detached, blurry images that may belong to someone else.
I hate being like this.
And then other times I’m like,
Okay, Ree. Enough already. Get over it.
Because how can I let someone who doesn’t love me anymore turn me into this person I don’t even recognize?
Being awake sucks.
My Persian cat Snickers, aka Snick-Snick, jumps up into bed with me and purrs. He curls up in a fluff ball, pressing against my ribs. I pet his long, soft fur. He feels sad, like me.
Question: When does the pain go away?
I reach over to my nightstand for the remote and my glasses. I turn on the TV. Here’s the agenda: I’ll watch a gazillion movies, read the huge stack of magazines I’ve accumulated because I never have time to read them, and snarf horrifying amounts of junk food until it’s time to get up and go to school on Monday.
Getting dumped is crazy times. Like . . . what? You’re supposed to instantly turn off all your emotions just because he says it’s over? You’re supposed to go on with your life like nothing happened?