The last person Felix and Saffy attacked had been knocked out cold, but their kicks bounced off Boris like rubber.
Boris rubbed his head, looking confused.
âAre you, um, OK?' Jasper asked Boris nervously.
Boris looked at Jasper. âFriends of yours?' he asked quietly.
Jasper nodded, as Saffy and Felix both shook their heads furiously.
Boris turned towards Saffy and Felix. âNice to meet you. I'm Boris,' he said, holding out his hand.
Saffy blinked. Felix let out a shocked laugh.
âHe's Bruno's brother. But he's nothing like Bruno. Right?' Jasper looked to Boris for assurance.
âI can't stand him. Last year, when he was here, was the best year of my life,' Boris grinned.
A couple of third-year students sauntered out of the food hall. âAre you serious? A Smurmymorph was living in your basement?' one of them exclaimed. They dropped their voices to a whisper when they noticed Boris, and walked quickly away.
Boris followed them with his gaze. âA Smurmymorph?' he muttered under his breath. His eyes flicked to Jasper. âWhat's going on here? This is a school for serious delinquents, right? Where they send the kids who are too bad for military school.
That's
what this place is supposed to be.'
Jasper looked at Felix and Saffy. âUm, well,' he stuttered.
âBecause, to be honest, none of the kids here seem that bad to me,' Boris continued. âThe kids at the military school I went to last year were far worse than anyone I've seen here so far.'
âGive us time,' Saffy shrugged. She looked sharply at Jasper, who took his cue.
âYeah, first day back and all,' he added.
âAnd what is it with this place?' asked Boris. âIt's freezing! And it's so dark, and ... is it just my two-way radio, or is there, like, some creepy whispering going on around the place?'
Jasper froze. Could Boris actually hear the whispering too?
Felix laughed, âYeah, Jasper used to go on about some weird whispering, hey, Jasp?'
Jasper mumbled something into his hoodie. He'd learnt last year that the strange whispering he heard was the result of a monster bite. A bite that had infected him with monsterness. And unless he controlled the whispering, he would slowly turn into a monster himself. He hadn't told Saffy and Felix about that yet. Whispering was the first monster characteristic to develop. Jasper knew there were other kids at school who'd been bitten too â they were called the Whispered. But Boris? A
prefect
?
Saffy shared a look with Felix. âMaybe it's just your mind playing tricks. Fear will do that to you. This is a pretty cold and spooky place â until you get used to it,' she added.
âI don't scare easily,' Boris said. âBut it is
really
cold.' He was interrupted by his radio crackling to life. He listened intently, and then said, âRoger that. I'm on my way, sir. Over and out.'
Boris nodded at Jasper, Saffy and Felix. âWell, duty calls. But McPhee, you owe me a story,' he said, turning and marching away.
As soon as Boris had turned the corner, Saffy took off her shoe and inspected her foot. A massive bruise was blossoming across it. âOw! It felt like I kicked a bloomin' brick wall!' she complained.
âLast time we come to save you, Jasper,' said Felix. âYou weren't even in trouble.'
âGee, don't sound so disappointed,' Jasper replied. âAnyway we have Rest and Relaxation class now, you can both let your pain simply float away. Come on.'
The three of them started down the hallway.
âWho would have thought, hey?' Felix said as they walked towards class. âBruno has a brother who isn't a complete bully! Mad.'
âYeah, but I don't know if we can trust him,' said Saffy. âIt's a bit weird â him asking all those questions about the school.'
âMaybe we should let him know what's going on,' said Jasper, thinking of what Boris had said about the whispering. âHe was pretty nice. And he suspects something. I bet he'll find out sooner or later.'
âShall I go through
all
the flaws in your thinking?' Saffy scoffed. âOne, he is a prefect. They don't know about monsters. Which brings me to
two
, they aren't supposed to know about monsters. Three, he would think you were insane, because, honestly, who still believes in monsters at our age? Four, he is too old to see monsters anyway, and five â' âUnless,' Jasper interrupted, then stopped.
Unless he's been bitten by one,
Jasper thought.
And
he is one of the Whispered. Then he'd still be able to
see monsters.
âUnless?' Saffy prodded.
Jasper grinned. âUnless you're a complete know-it-all who has to be right all the time, pain in the â'
âATTENTION!' Stenka's voice crackled over the intercom.
The three of them stopped in their tracks. The Monstrum House intercom didn't sound like the normal, tinny sort you heard in most schools. It sounded as though a voice was drilling into your brain.
âAll students proceed to the assembly hall immediately for an emergency school assembly. THAT MEANS NOW!'
Felix jumped. âWe'd better go,' he said, and started in the direction of the hall.
âMaybe we'll get out of Rest and Relaxation,' Saffy said to Jasper with a wink.
Jasper hated Rest and Relaxation â the class where their teacher tried to make them relax at the same time as scaring them half out of their wits. But an emergency school meeting?
That really didn't sound good.
The hall was buzzing with anticipation. No-one knew what the assembly was about.
âEmergency assembly? What do you reckon?' Saffy asked.
âI reckon there must be some sort of emergency,' Jasper grinned.
Saffy rolled her eyes.
There was a chuckle from behind them. âSo, they let you back in?'
Jasper's hood was pulled over his eyes by a fourth-year boy in a black hoodie.
âMac!' Felix cheered.
âLet
us
back in?' Jasper replied, as he squirmed out from under Mac's grip. âYou're the old one. Isn't there an age limit at Monstrum? Are there any other fourth years, or are you the only one immature enough to be allowed back in?'
Mac smiled. âHa ha. Actually, there are nine others in my class. But this is it for me. One more year before I can start work in the outside world. I was thinking of joining a tracking crew, but then you have to work night shifts, and I don't know if that's me.'
Felix nudged Jasper. âThat's like your mum, right?'
Jasper nodded. He'd only just found out at the end of last year that his mum wasn't actually a garbage collector, but worked for Monstrum House with their Tracking Department. Instead of spending her mornings driving a truck to pick up rubbish, she was following monsters as they crept through the dark streets. Jasper had been happier thinking she was a garbo.
âSo what's all this about then?' Saffy asked Mac.
Mac smiled. âHave you seen that plant â the one that looks like ivy â that's growing, like, all over the school? I reckon that a Day of Laying might be coming.' Mac clapped his hands in excitement.
âUh-oh,' Felix groaned. âHe clapped. He's excited. This can't be good.'
Jasper was thinking the same thing. The only time Mac got excited was when he was hunting monsters.
âLadies and gentlemen!' said a gravelly voice.
Jasper was amazed that he hadn't heard Principal Von Strasser enter the hall. Von Strasser always rode a horse, even indoors, and usually the clip-clopping was enough to silence everyone. Jasper turned to see the principal wearing a purple samurai outfit and a helmet on his head. He was sitting majestically on top of his horse. And the horse was wearing slippers.
âNice helmet,' Saffy whispered sarcastically.
âWhy thank you, Ms Dominguez.' Von Strasser beamed over the crowd at Saffy, who turned a deep red.
âWelcome, welcome, welcome. Welcome one and all to another exciting year at Monstrum House,' announced the principal. âAs you can see, the first years have not arrived yet, and will not do so for another week. I am sure they're still putting graffiti on walls, stealing cars and other such leisurely activities. But we,
we
have serious work to get down to. Preferably before they arrive.'
There were murmurs around the hall.
âSILENCE!' screeched Stenka, the scariest teacher in the school. No-one made a sound.
âI am sorry to say that, once again, the Day of Laying has come upon us,' said Von Strasser.
Mac elbowed Jasper in the ribs.
âIn the coming days, a swarm of monsters known as Skrinkerscreech will attempt to infiltrate the school grounds,' continued the principal. âThe Skrinkerscreech are flying, insect-like monsters.' Von Strasser paused. âWell, I say insect-like, but they are actually about the size of a goat. Or a very small horse. But they look like insects. Quite terrifying, really. In fact, of all the monsters within the Screecher order, I would say that these probably scare me the most. Perhaps it's their oversized stingers, or their fanged mandibles, or the fact that they were the first species of monster to be classed in the Screecher order. Hmmm â¦' Von Strasser stopped speaking, apparently lost in thought.
Stenka cleared her throat. Their principal looked around in surprise.
âOh, yes. Here you all are. Of course. Well, then. Keep an eye open for a swarm of flying goat-sized insect-monsters. That's all. Bye for now.' Von Strasser turned his horse around as he waved.
âWait!' Saffy called out. âWhy are they trying to get into the school?'
Stenka fixed her with a stare.
Von Strasser turned back to face them. âThank you, Ms Dominguez. I'm not sure if you've noticed the rather beautiful plant that has recently become rather overgrown around the school? It's screechwort. The Skrinkerscreech nest in it once every five years. They have done so for millennia.'
âScreechwhat?' Jasper whispered to Mac.
âNo,
screechwort
,' said Von Strasser. âIt is the Skrinkerscreech's birth plant. All monsters need to feed on their birth plant when they first hatch. Without it, they don't develop any monster characteristics and they can't become monsters. For example, a Grubbergrind would simply be a spider, an Octoglug would be an octopus, et cetera, et cetera. It is something in the birth plant that causes the monster hatchling to mutate and become a monster. The Skrinkerscreech's birth plant is screechwort. And it just so happens that we have a lot of it growing here at Monstrum House.'
Saffy's jaw had dropped open. âHang on, so what you're saying is,
inside
the school grounds there's a plant that turns monster hatchlings into monsters?'
Stenka turned to Saffy, looking as if death rays would shoot from her eyeballs.
âQuite,' Von Strasser nodded.
âAnd you haven't thought to pull the plant out?' Saffy asked.
âMs Dominguez!' Stenka exploded.
âThank you, Stenka,' said Principal Von Strasser. âBut I will explain. Screechwort can't be killed, Ms Dominguez. It's a plant with monster characteristics. It thrives in the cold, dark conditions here. It loves negative feelings. Pulling it out makes it come back twice as big. Spraying it with weed killer makes it grow. Besides, it's quite useful. The leaves are a vital component of many anti-venoms when properly prepared.'
Von Strasser smiled pleasantly. âThere will be nineteen monsters altogether. The queen is particularly impressive. You will need to find her nest and stop her eggs from hatching. Enjoy your day.' He waved, and trotted out of the hall.
Mac thumped Jasper on the back. âCool, huh?' he grinned.
âYeah,' Jasper replied, âgreat.'
Monstrum House wasn't your everyday, run-of-the-mill school. All of the subjects had just one objective: to teach the students how to hunt monsters. Some of the subjects were cool, but Rest and Relaxation wasn't one of them. It was somewhere between a meditation class and an army boot camp.
âGood morning, Class 2B,' the Rest and Relaxation teacher boomed.
âGood morning, Master Poon, sir!' the class replied, as if they were soldiers. Saffy mumbled something else under her breath.
Their teacher, a deranged army general called Master Poon, was sitting cross-legged in the middle of a circle of rose-scented candles. He was dressed in full camouflage gear, complete with a bush on his helmet.
âNow sit,' Master Poon ordered.
The students quickly sat down.
âI have some candles here today to help you all to relax,' yelled Master Poon. âI want all of you to be very calm. I don't want you to think about your hair catching alight or how horribly your little faces could be disfigured by hot wax. Smell the candles!' he shouted. âAre you smelling them?'