Teach Me: Sinful Desires (18 page)

“Love isn’t meaningless, Bryce. And sex with love is something, too, something beyond understanding. The fact that you don’t know that is scary,” Destini said.

“Why? Because you need an explanation for my obsession and your feelings, is that it, Destini?”

“You don’t know anything about my feelings. You just want me to understand and nurture yours.”

“Those feelings, Destini, the ones that get in your marrow, your blood, and bind you to a man who doesn’t deserve you. Like your Mister Dumont,” he sneered.

She flinched. Something dark and unrepentant passed over his eyes, and she felt another chill. This one was so bitter she hugged herself. But as soon as it chilled, it dispelled. He looked upon her again with understanding. “I can help you, Destini. But I’m not a patient man, not a sharing man. If you belong to me, then you belong to me those terms of the contract won’t be changed...”

“I don’t need to belong to anyone. Remember? I came here for a job Bryce. And you might be committed to this place but not me.”

“Then I have your answer,” Bryce said with a hint of disappointment.

“You asked the wrong question. You said the night we shared together I needed the courtship. I still do Bryce.”

He nodded. “Right courtship. Yet you came to a sex den to learn something else. Didn’t you? Learn more about the lifestyle. How else could you answer all those questions in that pretty head of yours? Through Rain? Your imagination can only take you so far. I’m talking about shedding labels. I’m talking about you truly understanding the rewards in belonging to a real flesh and blood man.”

“You’re talking about me giving up my identity for sex,” she said.

Bryce laughed. “You already did that when you created Rain.”

He might as well hit her in the chest with an aluminum bat. The truth couldn’t hurt any worse.

What you put out in the universe will always come back to you, Destini
, her mother once warned.
Satan comes when you call, and he doesn’t always have horns.

Bryce wasn’t the devil, but he definitely made her think of sin, pride, and all that buried guilt she carried over her sexual desires. Destini pressed her lips together, holding her breath, a habit of hers when she needed to think. It was as if the lack of oxygen to her brain would spark a solution. Naiya had fought with her constantly about her dual life, especially since she believed that there was something wrong with her living in Rain’s shadow. But Destini liked shadows. She felt safe there. She imagined Sir did too.

In shadows, Destini could explore passion, could write about it, dissect it; create it without guilt or spiritual conviction. Was she to now bring him into that game? And isn’t that what this ultimately was? A game?

Destini took a step toward him. “If I refuse? What if I want to wear my mask, be a schoolteacher, marry a blue-collar man who I cook dinner for every night and then birth babies for him? And what if I want to settle on love, the one with the label, and give up the Destini-in-chains fantasy? Will you let me go?”

“Truth?”

“Yes. For once, stop speaking in riddles. Will you let me leave here and never bother me again if you can’t be my lover without this... this thing between us?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never wanted anyone, needed anyone like I need you. I’m not sure if I can force myself to give in or let you give up,” he answered.

A sudden stillness froze the air, paralyzing her lungs so that her breathing seemed to stop. It was as if the rest of the world had dissolved into a hazy mist of moonlight and dark roses, making him the only solid, real thing in her universe. Those beautiful eyes of his lost the gleam of superiority. They became something pure, undiluted, humble and caring. Destini felt her heartbeat slow to a barely-there thread of a pulse. He lifted a hand to ease it inside the front of her leather jacket and cup her breast. It felt like it happened in slow motion. So did the movement of his head as he lowered it, angling his mouth to hers. And Destini responded without thought, lifting her face up to his. Her lips parted slightly, her body braced for the pending kiss. At the same time, he pinched and rolled her nipple through her sweater and the lace cup of her bra.

“Destini,” he said, the warmth of his breath covered her mouth before his lips made contact.

He continued to press closer. It was as if his desire had seeped in through her clothes and spread over her skin. It didn’t stop. There was heat. Fiery passion melted down her bones, dissolving all of her resistance. He ran the tip of his tongue over the seam of her bottom lip in a swirl that dazed her. And when she swayed on her feet, his arms came around her and pulled her into him to keep her secure.

Destini wanted to hold him. So she did. She lifted her arms and slipped them around his neck, fingers caressing the softness of the hair on his nape.

“Let me fuck you,” he said again, before dipping his tongue between her parted lips as a low groan rose in his throat. Still cradling the back of his neck with one hand, she trailed the tips of her fingers along his hard jawline. She listened to Bryce’s deep inhalations of breath and smiled against his mouth. It didn’t have to be such a war with them. Tenderness could be just as passionate as his other desires. She could teach him a thing or two about that.

When he forced her down on the cool concrete she clung to him. Bryce was in control. Their mouths remained only centimeters away from each other. Their eyes locked in an unbreakable stare. She clung to him. She shivered. And in minutes her jeans and underwear were trapped at her ankles. Destini closed her eyes. When she felt the dramatic thrust of his invading cock she cried out and arched up into his embrace. His tongue plunged and she nearly choked on his kiss.

Bryce was merciless. He fucked her hard against the gazebo floor. The tender flesh of her bottom scraped the abrasive concrete. And he kept going. Fucking her while looking at her. She didn’t dare blink. And when she felt the intensity coil tighter in her pelvis for him she whimpered her pleasure. Bryce swiped his tongue over her lips and whispered four words in her ear: “I love this pussy.”

She smiled and let go. He joined her soon after. And there for several long moments they lay still until they could capture their breaths. It was quick. But sharing that brief moment with him reminded her of why she stayed, why she wanted more.

He withdrew.

Bryce moistened his lips. He seemed dazed, winded. She knew that feeling. Then it passed. He stood and put his dick in his pants. She pulled hers up and kept her head bowed. When she looked up at him she averted her eyes once more. His gaze sharpened with such hunger she longed for the fury that was his passion. She was well aware of how intense it was to be his. But he surprised her by pulling her into his arms and holding her. He held her in the midst of the blooming roses with the moon as their spotlight.

“It’s getting late,” she gave a nervous chuckle.

Bryce dropped his forehead on hers. “Walk with me,” he said, his moist lips only a fraction of an inch from hers. “No more talking. Just you and me.”

She agreed.

His arms dropped from around her waist. He took her hand. Together they strolled along a mowed path through a maze of black roses. There were several marble statues depicting mythical creatures. Destini chose a favorite: a unicorn with a woman riding him bareback. Frozen in time, her back arched and her breasts were bare. There was such freedom in that sculpture. How could this exist so close to the campus grounds and go unchallenged or discovered? She didn’t ask. The path they travelled had to be one made for the secrecy and sanctity of this forbidden garden.

Destini figured the stroll was a mile long. The path ended. Bryce turned her north. He wrapped his arms around her chest and dropped his chin on her shoulder. He kissed her just beneath her earlobe. She could see the lights of the dormitories and the teacher cottages off in the distance.

“So beautiful, my Destini. Trust me... all I want is to know you.”

Destini closed her eyes and let him hold her. She did what he asked and just allowed herself to feel. She was certain he’d touch her, kiss her, and possibly make love to her again. But he didn’t. “Tomorrow night I will wait for you. You remember where I want you to find me?”

She nodded.

With that he led her back down the path to his car and drove her out of the gardens.

Sixteen

Rain reclined her head. Her hair, heavy, wavy, slipped from her shoulders, dripped water to the tile floor. The sponge glided down between the valley of her breasts, leaving a foamy soap trail in its wake. Conrad stood directly under the shower. The water splashed his back also sent streams over his broad chest. He soaped her left breast, then her right. He took time to lather her stomach with suds. Then he moved the sponge lower, soaping up the small trim of pubic hairs before going between her legs. Rain turned. She dropped her hands flat to the shower wall. Conrad wrung the sponge’s excess out over her spine, allowing it to cascade over her vertebrae, down to the cleft of her round and shapely buttocks.

“Beautiful,” he said. “This is love...”

Rain stiffened. Where had the word come from? It had no place in the time and space that she shared with her lover. Maybe it was a slip, some euphemism that captured the moment, but didn’t define it. A label with no meaning. Yes! That’s what it was, a label with no meaning.

Rain rolled her ass for him. The steam of the shower gave her little visibility, but she batted her waterlogged lashes and focused on the speckled pattern of the shower wall. The damp air tasted of the mounting passion and the heat rising between them with each staggered breath. She had used the birch rod on him; he had used his tongue, whiplike, on her. Now it was time for her to feel him.

Should she ask?

She never had to before.

Before her lips parted, he stepped behind her. His palm cupped the right cheek of her tight ass. He stroked then slapped it hard, and it sounded off with a wet smack. He brought his thumb between them and let it circle the rim of her anus. Rain felt the muscles in both cheeks clench when he took the plunge. Her hands slid on the moist tiles of the wall and she scrambled, clawing the slick surface to keep balance.

“Mistress May I
—
” he asked.

“Yes, you may,” she panted.

His thumb eased out and the blunt tip of his cock pressed in. She put a dip in her back and bent forward. He grasped her under her belly as he eased each inch into her. The pleasure was so intense she bit down on her bottom lip until she drew blood.

“Rain, pleasure and pain... I plan to show you.” He thrust until he was fully seated.

Rain reached between her legs and began to stroke and massage her clit as he thrust into her repeatedly. “Yes, yes, show me, show me...”

“I will. Then I’ll make love to you.”

Destini smiled. She stared at her written word. Could Rain find love with Conrad? Would she even grant herself permission to accept love? If she were true to her character, the answer would be no. However, somehow after her midnight walk with Bryce, she found herself wanting to write it all the same. Deciding for a break, she reached for her phone. She dialed quickly before her pride told her not to.

“Dez? That you?”

“Yes. How are you?” she answered.

“Girl, so much better now that you called me. I was beginning to wonder if I was ever going to get my friend back.” Naiya’s chuckle was strained, a little forced. Destini heard the edge in her friend’s voice. She knew Naiya was growing resentful of the silent treatment. It was clear she assumed after their parting that they could resume their regular routine. After all, that’s what their friendship was. Naiya would do something or say something hurtful and Destini would excuse it, forgive and forget. That wasn’t possible now.

“Something wrong?” Destini asked.

“Not really. Life is pretty much the same except I miss my friend terribly.”

Destini smiled. She missed talking to Naiya as well. She didn’t know where to put her feelings of betrayal.

“Well I was calling to pick your brain,” Destini said with forced levity to her voice.

“Really? What’s up?”

“Russ the loser.”

“What about him?”

“He’s coming to Manchester Hills, to meet with me. Today. For dinner.”

“Come again?”

“I know, strange, but he’s coming to talk about… well he has cancer.”

“Cancer? He said that?”

“Yes,” she replied.

“And you believe him?”

Destini had every reason not too but for some reason she did. “Yes. I do.”

“Dez? Even if it is true, you don’t owe him shit.”

“I agree. But you know me. How could I say no?”

“Easy! N-O spells no!” Naiya clucked her tongue.

Smiling, Destini shook her head. “I do miss you.”

“I miss you too. I want to know about Gaylor. How is it up there? Bored yet?”

She wasn’t ready to talk about Bryce being her boss, or his proposal for her to be his companion. She definitely didn’t feel open to discussing why she still remained. “Gaylor’s fine.”

“Well, eventually, when you get settled, I’d like to visit. Maybe a weekend? We can do some shopping or something, girlie.”

“I’d like that. Yes, let’s do it. I’ll call you, maybe in a few months. Spring Break?”

“Oh... that long? Uhm, okay. I guess.”

Destini heard the disappointment in Naiya’s voice. She refused to address it. Being civil with her friend, despite the hurt and betrayal, was progress enough. “Hey, I have to go. I’ll tell you about the visit later. Okay?”

“Okay, love you, Destini. I really love you, girl, and I miss you.”

“I miss you too, Naiya. Talk to you again soon. Bye.” She set the phone back on the cradle. Operation connect-with-best-friend was officially over. Dropping back on her pillows, she nibbled the tender inside of her bottom lip.