Tease Me (7 page)

Read Tease Me Online

Authors: Donna Kauffman

Tags: #Romance, #Contemporary Women, #General, #Contemporary, #Fiction

Lainey had met Bunny. She was a casual friend of Minerva’s and a client of Lillian’s
who occasionally dropped in at the café. And in this case Lainey agreed with Irma.
The woman was a high-strung, Minnie Mouse sound-alike, a born-again fitness nut who
never missed an opportunity to lecture Lainey on the evils of fat grams. She all but
claimed Minerva was killing the population of Sunset Shores by not modifying her menu.
Aunt Minerva had long since tuned her out, but Lainey hadn’t been in town a month
when Bunny had swooped down on her like a vulture on fresh roadkill. Bless Minerva’s
kind heart, but Lainey didn’t know how she put up with the woman.

“I’ve heard her,” Lainey told Irma. “And I’m in complete agreement with you. Although
I have to give her one thing.”

“What?” the twins asked simultaneously.

“She looks better in a leotard than I do.”

Irma snorted. “That’s only because she dragged the name of Lillian’s plastic surgeon
out of her. I’m surprised he hasn’t retired on her bills alone.”

“Now, Irma, really,” chided Ida.

“Well, at least Lillian admits that’s why her fanny doesn’t hang to her knees.”

“I thought she got herself a personal trainer? That wrestler person, Sven the Avenger
or something.”

“Sven the Destroyer,” Irma corrected, making Lainey stifle a snort despite her irritation.
“And even he can only halt the vagaries of time for so long, Ida.”

“Ladies,” Lainey interjected, then immediately regretted
it when they both turned their attention back to her.

“And speaking of Lillian,” Irma said, drilling her with a sharp gaze. “How did your
appointment go?”

Lainey folded her arms and leaned back against the counter. “First, tell me exactly
why you sent me there without mentioning that the new Helga was a man.”

To her credit Irma didn’t even blink. “Because someone had to give him a test drive,
and we figured you’d think we were meddling old women if we told you Lillian’s masseuse
was a man.”

She didn’t want to hurt their feelings. Despite Irma’s brusque attitude, she knew
Irma really cared about her. “I thought we all agreed after Charlie that you two wouldn’t
interfere in my love life again.”

“Did I say anything about your love life?” Irma retorted. “I just wanted to know if
he was any good.” She leaned closer, her faded gray eyes sparkling. “So was he?”

Ida leaned forward. “Did he ask you out, dear?”

“He’s unmarried,” Irma added.

Ida nodded, her eyes twinkling too. “And a real hunk.”

Lainey sighed. The gentle route was obviously not working. “I don’t care if he’s an
unmarried hunk. I’m not interested in dating right now.”

“Where is he taking you?” Ida scooted her chair forward. Even Mr. Max was sitting
up with his ears perked at full attention.

“Who said he asked me out? I didn’t—”

“For heaven’s sake, I hope you didn’t say yes right away,” Irma said flatly. “It’s
not as if you have any competition around here. Don’t be too eager, or he’ll think
you’re easy.”

“Irma!” Ida pressed her hand to her chest.

Irma sniffed. “Just looking out for our Madelaine, Ida. If she’d have been more careful
with Charlie, she’d have probably—”

“Ended up exactly how I did,” Lainey said. “And I only went out with him on your sterling
recommendations and so your feelings wouldn’t be hurt.”

Both of their expressions immediately fell, leaving Lainey feeling as if she’d just
kicked Mr. Max.

She sighed. “Listen, I appreciate that you care about me, I really do. But—”

“Don’t let one bad apple sour you on the rest of the bunch,” Ida said, jumping right
back into it.

“Two bad apples,” Irma said. “Remember her louse of a husband. And who knows how many
before that.”

“Irma, for heaven’s sake, don’t remind the dear girl of her failures.”


My
failures?” Lainey said. She stopped abruptly and took a slow, deep breath. She should
have known better than to fall for their pouts. After eighty years of practice, the
sisters knew all the tricks and weren’t the least bit afraid to use as many of them
as they deemed necessary. Once decided on a course of action, nothing short of death
would deviate them from their path. And she was almost convinced the sisters were
immortal.

She had to find some way to end this right now. She’d made many bad choices in her
life, number one on the list being her ex-husband, Conrad. She’d married him for all
the wrong reasons, and in the end her impulsive choice had hurt them both. It had
taken a lot of teeth gnashing for her to include her ex-mother-in-law in the category
of innocent bystander, but two years and a thousand miles had made it a bit easier
to be gracious. When she’d decided
to stay in Florida, Lainey had also decided it was time to grow up and set some serious
goals and guidelines for her life.

Then Charlie had come along, another prime example of Lainey making bad choices for
the wrong reasons. But it had been a worthy lesson.

She took a breath and faced the sisters. “I appreciate your wanting to see me happy,
really I do,” she said earnestly. “But trust me, right now I’m happiest just being
on my own. I highly recommend Tucker for his masseur skills, but as for anything else,
I’m not interested. I’m serious about this and would appreciate it if you two would
help me out. Okay?”

They both nodded, then made their good-byes, but Lainey didn’t believe for a second
that her little speech had convinced them to end their interference. But it didn’t
really matter, because her little speech had convinced her. Tucker had been a fun,
harmless diversion. She’d consider her appointment that morning her last impulsive
fling. But that was the beginning and the end of it. She was even proud of herself
for recognizing it as such and not allowing his charm to flatter her into beginning
any sort of relationship. She didn’t need diversions in her life right now, particularly
charming male ones, no matter how temporary.

Pleased with herself, she turned back to her purchases and began unpacking the seafood.
Yes, she did have more important things to concentrate on than ex-bodyguard masseurs
with heart-attack hands and knee-melting smiles.

Something was up with Minerva. A frown pulled at her mouth and concern wrinkled her
forehead. Lainey didn’t know exactly what and Minnie wasn’t talking about
it, at least not to her. She admitted that her aunt’s silence hurt a bit, but it worried
her more. Especially when she’d spied Damian Winters in town. Her conversation with
him had been equally unrevealing.

She sighed a bit as she snugged memories of Tucker away in a back corner of her mind—for
a final impulsive fling, he’d certainly been a worthy choice, one she’d enjoy recalling
from time to time—but now she had to focus on life’s important matters. Charming men
weren’t on that list, but her aunt Minerva topped it. She was all the family Lainey
had left. One way or another, she had to find out exactly what her aunt was up to.

FOUR

Tucker reluctantly pushed through the door of the café. His talk with Lillian the
previous afternoon hadn’t gone exactly as planned. But then, when it came to Aunt
Lillian, things rarely did.

He breathed a small sigh of relief when he spied an older woman, presumably Minerva,
behind the counter. Maybe the gods would smile on him and Lainey would be off catering
something.

Lillian had ignored his arguments for discontinuing his new occupation and, with her
typical buzzard-eye style, zeroed in on his comments about Lainey. She was convinced
that Lainey was his key to solving the mystery, and nothing he had said could deter
her. He’d also perceived a healthy dose of matchmaking fervor underscoring her plans,
which he hadn’t even attempted to fight. It would only have made her more determined.
A frightening thought. As it was, he considered himself lucky that he’d gotten out
of there by agreeing to drop by the café for lunch and a hoped-for chat with Lainey
over coffee.
Tucker wasn’t sure what
he
hoped for, but a quick exit from Florida was looking really good at this point.

“Well, hello,” Minerva greeted him warmly. She was short and pleasantly soft in a
way that spoke well of her cooking skills. Her dark hair, only mildly scattered with
gray, was pulled back into a voluminous bun, and she wore a plain blue dress with
a white apron tied over it. She welcomed him with a smile as she finished arranging
slices of cake on an old-fashioned pedestal tray. There was a brush of flour on her
cheek and a smear of what looked like chocolate frosting on the bib of her apron.

A far cry from Aunt Lillian, Tucker thought. Minerva looked like the quintessential
grandmother. The kind of woman who probably fed strays. The kind of woman who’d likely
believe even a half-decently told sad-luck story. The kind of woman who could get
suckered into a scam because she was too kindhearted to see lies instead of truth.

He hadn’t really known what to expect. Lillian’s stories over the past few years hadn’t
left a permanent memory in his mental file. He realized now, that since Minerva was
Lillian’s closest friend, he’d been expecting someone more like … well, like Aunt
Lillian. One look told him this was a true case of opposites attracting. It didn’t
take any detective work to see why Lillian was so concerned. Minerva was a senior
sucker waiting to be duped.

Tucker didn’t know whether to groan at the additional helping of guilt or give Minerva
a comforting hug and tell her he’d take care of everything. The urge to do both was
equally strong. He settled for finding a spot at the counter and asking for coffee.

“Black?” she asked kindly. “Or do you like it sweet?”

Her eyes were brown, he noticed, unlike her niece’s.
He recalled with disturbing clarity green eyes with flecks of gold. Cat eyes. “Black
is fine,” he said, blinking away thoughts of Lainey.

Minerva studied him for a second longer, but her twinkling eyes didn’t reveal anything
other than warm hospitality.

And what else would they show? he asked himself disgustedly. That she can see one
thought of her niece had you almost squirming on your stool? He glanced down a bit
too quickly as she slid the heavy, white ceramic mug in front of him. No use taking
chances. One interfering busybody was enough. Minerva might look like a kindhearted
granny, but Tucker had no doubt there was more than one matchmaking bone in her body.
She had an unmarried niece. Meddling came with the territory.

“You must be Tucker,” she said as she wiped down the counter. “I was wondering if
you would pay us a visit.”

Warily, he glanced up at her, but her expression was completely guileless. “I only
started working for her yesterday.” He should have waited until the café was busier.
He was its only customer now. He swore his stool grew increasingly warmer under Minerva’s
steady regard.

“And I suspect you’re already busy,” she said easily. “At least if Lainey is to be
believed. She says you’ll make the ladies around here forget all about Helga.”

Lainey had talked to her about him? With a determined mental shove, he pushed aside
any questions he might have been tempted to ask. “I’m flattered to hear that.” He
smiled. A sip of coffee warmed him further. He could handle this.

Minerva paused in front of him. “You’ll pardon me for saying this, but if you’re half
as good with your hands as
you are to look at, I imagine you’ll be booked up solid by the end of the week.”

Tucker barely kept from choking on his coffee. He now knew exactly why Minerva and
Lillian were close friends. “I’m, uh …” He paused to clear his throat. Her eyes sparkled
so innocently, but Tucker was beginning to reevaluate who the gullible one was there.
He’d spent years making sure the wrong people didn’t get to those he was in charge
of protecting, honing his observational and character-judgment skills to a keen edge.
He rarely misjudged someone. In this instance his blind spot was probably caused by
wishful thinking. “I’m only helping Lillian out temporarily.”

“So I hear.” She patted his hand. “But I give even odds that if you start booking
them in, Lillian will find a way to keep you.”

“At least you gave me a fighting chance,” he said dryly.

She topped off his coffee. “Oh, I imagine if anyone could give Lillian a good run,
it would be you.”

Tucker took another sip as he let that comment sink in. Her tone had been warmly sincere.
So what was she implying? He already realized that Minerva was far sharper than her
homemade-pie personality let on, but did she know who he really was?

“I have no idea what Lainey said about me that would give you that idea.” He gave
her his best charming grin. “But I’ll take it as a vote of confidence.”

She smiled back, her eyes as guilelessly merry as ever. Tucker braced himself.

“Not to sound critical, but Lainey hasn’t always been the best judge of character
when it comes to men. After the Charlie fiasco, she decided—wisely, if you ask me—to
step back and examine her mistakes and figure out what keeps getting her in trouble.
I told her she needs to spend more time thinking things through. Jackrabbits have
more patience than our Lainey. Of course, she managed to resist you—though heaven
knows why she picked now to put my advice to the test.” She gave him a once-over that
made him squirm on his stool, then sighed and shook her head. “I love her dearly,
but the girl has no sense of timing.”

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