Tempting BAD: VIP Spin Off (18 page)

She made me laugh, a lot. Most of the time I couldn’t believe half the shit that came out of her mouth. She was random and so full of energy; I didn’t think I could keep up. I guess you could say she made me lighten up and maybe even kept me young.

If that made any sense at all.

I enjoyed her company that night. We exchanged phone numbers and before I knew it we were dating. I met her brother Landon a few other times; he was a nice guy. He and his wife had two young boys, with a girl on the way. They both seemed close, like I was with my sisters.  I really liked that about her.

We had exclusively been together for the last month or so. Before that, we were talking/dating for at least four months. My sisters and mother approved of her immediately; they were ecstatic that I had finally settled down. And she seemed to fit in nicely with my family.

She was the first woman I had ever met that I didn’t feel the urge or need to protect. It was a nice change of pace for me. It was probably one of the reasons I was so attracted to her. Or it could have been the fact that I felt old. I had just turned thirty-seven and I was alone. I was tired of coming home to an empty house. I never thought the day would come where I felt lonely, but I did.

I didn’t want to die alone. To be completely honest, I didn’t know if it was Christine or if it could have been any woman at that point in my life. I just felt like I needed to settle down with someone that made me happy, and she did.

Even if the love I felt wasn’t consuming and devouring, or life-altering as I heard many of my friends and family members describe… maybe I just wasn’t made like that. I had seen too much and experienced more than any person should ever go through.

This was the best it could ever get for me. And I was alright with that.

“Devon, what are those dreams about?”

I swallowed, turning away from her and staring at the ocean in front of us. She nestled up closer to me, almost sensing that I needed it.

“Just dreams,” I replied.

“I’m aware of that part. What are they about? You seem terrified when they happen and sometimes it scares me. When you wake up, it’s almost like you’re still there. Wherever it is that you’re coming from.”

I took in her words, knowing exactly what she was talking about.

They were real.

I lived through them.

“I just want to help you. I want to help us… all three of us.”

I instantly turned to look at her. “What?” I questioned confused.

She smiled. “I know… we haven’t been together long, but I do love you. I have no idea how it happened, because we never have sex without a condom, but I’m pregnant, Devon. I went to the doctor a few days ago to confirm and I’ve been trying to find the right time to tell you.” She extended her hands up in the air. “SURPRISE! You knocked me up!” she yelled, laughing.

Only she could make such a special moment a joke. I laughed. “I don’t… wow… what? I’m mean, are you sure? I’m yes… the doctor told you…” I mumbled, trying to gather my thoughts.

She chuckled, lifting up onto her knees and facing me. “Are you happy? I mean is this okay?”

“Yeah… it’s more than okay.”

“Really?”

I nodded. “I love you, too. I couldn’t be happier right now.” And it was the truth… in that moment, under the sunset, on the sand, with her in my arms, carrying my child. Our child. I loved her.

I kissed her and then reached down to touch her belly.

And in that second I loved my child, more than anything else in this world.

Several months later, Christine was glowing and gorgeous. We were having a boy and decided to name him Ethan Joshua Hill. We prepared for everything and anything under the sun, slowly awaiting the arrival of our baby boy.

My phone rang with Ysabelle’s face lighting the screen. “Look who decided to come out of hiding?” I answered.

“Oh… you know, a little of this, a little of that. I like to keep you on your toes, Mr. Hill. What are you and your bitchy girlfriend doing?”

“Right… about that…” I paused.

I knew this wasn’t going to go over well
,
but it was now or never.

“Yes?” she inquired.

“We sort of went to the court house and got married last weekend.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” She yelled a little too loudly, that I needed to move the phone away from my ear.

“Wow, Kid, a congratulations would have probably been a better opener, don’t you think?”

“Why?” she questioned in an angry tone.

“I don’t know, Ysabelle, because we love each other. We are going to be a family in a few months. That’s pretty standard stuff.”

“Great. Just fucking great, Devon. Congrat-u-fucking-lations.” She hung up.

I stared at my phone for a few seconds before calling her back.

“Kid…” was all I said and she broke down crying.

“I’ll be there in fifteen minutes,” I said and hung up.

I walked right in to Ysabelle’s apartment, and I could tell that she hadn’t moved from the couch for a few days. Her face appeared crazy and she had raccoon eyes from crying. I approached her like I would a wounded animal.

Cautious.

She patted the seat next to her and I smiled.

“What’s going on?” I questioned, sitting beside her.

“I don’t know, Devon… I’m so fucked up. I have no idea what I’m doing anymore. I’m sad, depressed, and crying like a little bitch on my couch.” She laughed and cried at the same time.

“Kid…” I said, putting my arms around her. “Is it about that guy at the bar?”

A few months ago she had come to see me at my bar and this guy who I had never seen before, was hanging out with her. He looked head over her heels in love with her. I didn’t think I had ever seen anyone look so enthralled and consumed by someone else before. It had been endearing to watch, especially Ysabelle being at the receiving end of such emotion.

“How do you know?” she whispered.

“I’m a man and I know what it looks like when another man is interested. Did he hurt you?”

“Yes… no… I don’t know,” she mumbled.

I sighed and kissed her forehead, “I have known you a very long time, Ysabelle, and I can’t help but feel relieved.” She moved to face me.

“What?”

“You let him in. I never thought you’d allow it.” I still didn’t know what she was up to, or what she was doing with her life. But I wasn’t stupid… it had been almost eight years since she walked into my life.  Everything had changed about her; especially her demeanor.

I worried that she was doing something illegal or damaging to her self-esteem. The more I saw her, the less of the girl I once knew, was there.

“Do you see this right here?” she addressed, pointing to herself. “This…is why I’m not supposed to give a shit. I end up looking and feeling like shit, Devon. I can’t think, I can’t sleep, I can’t fucking get off my couch. All I want to do is eat ice cream and watch sappy movies, and I hate sappy movies,” she whined.

I laughed. “You’re kind of adorable right now and that could be a plus.”

“Ahhhh!” she yelled, grabbing the pillow off the couch and hitting me over the head repeatedly.

“Oh come on… just call him and work it out. Everything can be worked out. If it can’t, then he doesn’t deserve you. You will find someone who will,” I explained.

“It’s not that easy Devon.”

“It never is, life is not like that,” I said, knowing that it was true.

“You sound like a fortune cookie.” We both laughed.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t supportive about the whole marriage thing. I’m happy for you…kind of.”

“It was a spur of the moment thing.”

My sisters and mother were extremely disappointed that we didn’t have a wedding, but in the end they understood. I think my mom was just happy that I was finally married and giving her a grandson. Lauren was married and had two kids, Alexis was also married and had three kids, and Liv was pregnant with her third.

My mom also remarried a few years ago to Scott. It was the first time I had ever seen her truly happy. Her life began and it was one of the best feelings I had ever experienced before; to see my sisters and mom get what they truly deserved. We were all finally settled and moving forward from the past.

Except my dreams…

Always my memories.

“Does that mean you can’t be my friend anymore? Don’t men usually become pussy whipped when they’re married, because their wives become crazier and controlling? Christine was already that, am I screwed?” she asked, taking me away from my thoughts.

“That will never happen, you’re stuck with me.” We both smiled.

I ordered us Chinese food and stayed with her all day, watching sappy movies.

I went home that evening to Christine and woke up to my father’s fists, just like I always had.

It had been another year, and not much had changed in my life. Madam had become different in a way I never thought was possible. Her cool and calm demeanor changed for some reason and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. I didn’t understand what was going on or even how to handle it, but The Cathouse changed in some ways. I started to take over a lot more responsibility and a part of me felt like she was molding me.

For something to come.

I had gone shopping with Ysabelle for a dress for The Gala that evening.

“Are you all right, Bella?” I asked with concern.

“Yes.”

“You know you can talk to me, right? I’m here for you.”

“I know.”

“I’ve been there, you know?”

“What?” she questioned with curiosity.

I knew she had been dating a married man. Sebastian Vanwell. They met at a yacht party and I noticed the look in his eyes immediately. I knew he was going to be trouble and a huge part of me wanted to protect her; to warn her. But I knew it wouldn’t have mattered. We all needed to experience life’s cruelty at our own time.

That’s life.

“Where you are now, I’ve been there. It’s a place I never want to be again. It was within the first year of me being a VIP. He was charming, loving, and I was young and naïve. He was the first man that made me feel like I was cherished. When we were intimate, it felt as if we were one person; like we were united and soul mates.” She listened carefully.  I had never shared this with anyone before.

“I was reckless, I knew exactly what I was getting myself into. He was married too, the epitome of the perfect husband and father to the public; he was high profile. Except he promised that he would leave his wife for me. Of course, I believed him. I got pregnant. When I told him, he politely and lovingly made me believe that having an abortion would be the right thing to do.

“I was so in love with him, that I did. Bella…he didn’t even show up for the appointment. I went through it all by myself. Madam was livid when she found out about our affair; then the abortion. She raised hell and high water. She was a terror in her fury.” A single tear fell down my face. I was reliving it all over.

“After it was done, he never saw me again. I know it hurts like hell, Bella. Just believe me, it’s for the best. To be completely honest, you’re not the first one; it’s happened to all of us at one point in time. We aren’t made of stone, even though our lifestyle insures us that we should be. You know now what it feels like to love. All good things must come to an end, Bella,” I hesitated, “we are who we are.”

“Brooke, what if I want more?”

“Then, my love, as the words of the poem; ‘tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.’” We laughed.

“I love you, Ysabelle,” I said as I embraced her in a tight hug. “Now, let’s go find you a smoking hot dress.”

Several weeks later Madam called me and told me that Ysabelle was leaving. That she was leaving VIP. I texted her and wished her well. It didn’t matter where life would take her or me, we would always be in each other’s lives. As much as I would miss her, I knew it was best for her. She wasn’t a lifer like I was. For some indescribable reason, VIP was important to me. I couldn’t put my finger on it and I didn’t try to dwell on it. VIP, The Cathouse… it was home.

Now it was my chance to prove myself to The Madam…

Because…

I wanted VIP.