The Apprehension: Unexpected Circumstances Book 6 (4 page)

He collapsed on top of me, and I relished the feel of his weight against my body.  I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and my legs around his waist, holding him tightly to me as his hot breath coated my body.

“I will not let you down again.” Branford breathed against that spot of skin on my neck to which he was so often drawn.  “I will be at your side, protecting you, always.  Edgar would have to kill me before I would allow any harm to come to you again.”

*****

In the weeks that followed, Branford kept his word.  We were never far from each other, and if we were more than a few feet apart, it was when Branford trained with his army, or I was required in the Women’s Room.  Against my wishes, he brought a farm woman in from the borders of Silverhelm to prepare and test my food and drink before it was offered to me.  Though I argued against it, both Sunniva and Branford were adamant—my safety was more important, and the woman’s family would be well compensated for her loyalty.

Her name was Chelsea, and she spoke quickly and brightly of how honored she was to be placed in such a position, for the Commoner Queen—as I was apparently called in the borderlands—had to be protected.   Her family had lived in Silverhelm for many generations, and her father had served in Camden’s army years before.  Though I had heard from Father Tucker that I was favored by the people of Silverhelm, and Branford had certainly mentioned it many times before, I had never really encountered someone from outside the castle who made the sentiment so clear.  She told me her granddaughter, born the spring before, had even been named Alexandra in my honor.

Hadley was officially released from her service as Branford’s concubine, and not a day later, Sir Brigham asked Branford’s permission to court and eventually marry her.  Branford merely turned to me and left the decision in my hands.  Of course I agreed, and it was not long before their wedding day was upon us.

Though the air in the room was cool, I woke up to the warmth of blankets pulled up around my shoulders and Branford’s body wrapped partially around mine.  His hand was in my hair, stroking through it again and again, as he did most mornings.

“It is late,” I said as I looked at the light coming through the windows.  I half expected Branford to comment on how I had been sleeping later these past few days, but he did not make mention of it.

“A bit,” Branford said with a shrug.  His lips touched my temple as his arms held me tighter against his chest.  “You looked so peaceful; I could not bring myself to wake you.”

“It is a wonderful excuse for you to lie in as well,” I commented.  Branford’s body shook slightly with a quiet chuckle.

“Perhaps.”  He hugged me to him again.  “You know me too well.”

“We should still rise.  There is a lot to accomplish before evening.”

“Ida is here,” Branford said.  “I doubt there will be anything left to prepare.  I am quite sure she has everything organized for the feast already, and there are probably a dozen handmaids assisting Had—the bride.”

My husband’s obvious distaste for uttering the name or even being in the presence of his former concubine was troublesome.  Though he uttered no disapproval of the joining of Hadley to Sir Brigham, he completely avoided all talk of the wedding plans.  Even though he was always by my side, just as he swore he would be after Janet’s treachery was discovered, he avoided any contact with Hadley.  When I spoke with Hadley about her upcoming ceremony, Branford would stand to one side, barely offering her a nod in acknowledgement.

I understood why but had no idea what to do about it.  The few times I had attempted to even bring Hadley’s name up to Branford, he had been quick to distract me, either with talk of urgent matters or more likely with his deft hands and mouth against my skin.

As he had done the first year of our marriage, Branford spent much of his time devising ways of getting me to some quiet corner alone.  There he would attempt—and most likely succeed—to seduce me.  I often found myself having to change out of muddied clothing in the middle of the day.  Even more often, Sunniva would give me a sly smile as she pulled a wayward piece of straw from my hair.

I bit down on my lip as I forced any optimistic thoughts from my head.  I refused to wonder, speculate, or remotely consider the thought that I might be…

I couldn’t even bring myself to summon the word to my head even though I knew I felt off-kilter.

“I should still see if my assistance is needed,” I said, and Branford sighed before releasing his grip on me.   I dressed myself and warmed a cup of cider near the fire as Branford rinsed his hands and face in the basin.  Branford paused, sniffed at it, and gave me a lopsided grin before drinking it down.

Though he tried to make light of his revived paranoia, it was not always so amusing.  Branford had not gone as far as to ban tea outright; he never drank it again, nor did I.  It was not out of fear of the drink itself but more out of Branford’s reaction to it.

Branford slipped his fingers through mine and brought the back of my hand to his lips.

“I love you, my wife,” he said softly.

I felt heat warm my cheeks as I responded in kind.  With my arm linked through his, we left the royal chambers and made our way to the grand hall where Ida and Sunniva were instructing servants in the decorations for the feast after the ceremony.

“Just for a moment, Branford,” I said as I attempted to leave my husband’s side long enough to make sure Hadley needed no assistance from me.

“Not alone,” he said, and his hand gripped mine tighter.

“Branford…it’s only the next room.”

“Never again.”  Branford’s eyes darkened, and I recognized the set of his jaw that meant he would be difficult to dissuade.  Eventually he agreed to wait outside the door for me, but convincing him was not easy.  As I closed the door behind me, I realized it was the first time I had been out of Branford’s field of vision since the poisoned tea was discovered.

I checked on Hadley and hugged her briefly before I returned to Branford’s side, not wanting him to be too distressed.  He immediately took me into his arms and held me against his body for a moment before we took our places at the front of the chapel.

The ceremony was beautiful, and I could not help but compare it to my own as I listened to Father Tucker’s words and watched Sir Brigham lift the veil from Hadley’s face to kiss her lips softly.  I looked to Branford then, wondering if he was also thinking of our first kiss, but he was staring at the floor in front of his booted feet and not watching at all.

After the wedding, everyone moved to the great hall for the marriage feast.  Though Branford placed his hand on Brigham’s arm in brief congratulations, he said nothing at all to Hadley.  I gripped his arm, and he glanced at me out of the corner of his eye before he walked a few feet away to speak to Sunniva.

I took a deep breath and looked at Hadley, whose eyes were cast to the ground.  Sir Brigham was speaking with Dunstan and did not seem to notice.

“Pay him no mind,” I said softly to her.  “He just does not know what to say.”

“He hates me,” Hadley said quietly.  “He does not even look at me.”

“I do not think that is true,” I responded in the same soft tones.  “He blessed your marriage, did he not?”

Hadley nodded.

“Forgive me,” she said.  “I did not mean to sound ungrateful, I just…”

I reached out and touched her arm to silence her.

“Of course you did not,” I said.  “And you must not take to heart what Branford does.  If given the opportunity, he would probably question his own loyalties as well.”

Hadley covered her hand to muffle her chuckle.

“Alexandra,” Hadley said, and though her smile stayed on her face, her eyes dimmed, “I will miss you so.”

“Miss me?” I questioned.

Hadley’s smile faltered, and her eyes narrowed in confusion.

“When we leave,” she said.

“What are you saying?” I asked Hadley as she broke our gaze.

“I thought you would have known already,” she said softly.

I shook my head.

“King Branford is sending us to live in Seacrest,” she told me.  “With Sir Rylan coming here for the negotiations with Hadebrand, Brigham is going to be in charge of the men left behind to protect Seacrest.”

I scowled and looked to where Branford was dancing with his adoptive mother.  In my mind, I tried to determine exactly when he had made such plans since there had been so very few times when we were even out of earshot of one another.  My memories soon took me to an afternoon several days ago when Branford was practicing with his men in the field.  There were several new, young recruits—boys more than men—who had come from the outlying farms of Silverhelm.  Sir Rylan had been there, and I did recall Branford, Sir Brigham, and Sir Rylan all standing near each other and speaking in low voices as I watched and knitted from the edge of the field.

“He did not tell you,” Hadley surmised.

“No, he did not.”

“He does not want me here,” she said softly.

I could not argue the point for though I knew he appreciated her willingness to serve Silverhelm, she was the reminder of what he had done—what he had sacrificed.  Having the opportunity to send Sir Brigham, and therefore Hadley as well, out of the kingdom was probably quite a relief to Branford.

“He finds it difficult to be in your presence,” I finally admitted.

“And for you as well?” she asked.

I reached out and touched her white lace-clad arm.

“No, my dear friend,” I said.  “I am grateful to you.  At the time, we had no choice, and if it had to be someone, I am glad it was you.  What if it had come down to Whitney?  Or if another servant had been chosen—maybe even Janet?  I hate to think of what might have happened if someone else had been in your place.”

We hugged briefly, and my hands slid down her arms to grasp her fingers.

“And that opportunity has brought you to your Brigham,” I said with a smile.  “Wherever you are, you will be at his side.  He loves you so dearly.”

Hadley’s cheeks flushed, and she looked at her feet as she smiled.

“He has said it would be…different,” she said in hushed tones.  “Even Father Tucker said tonight would still be my first…in the eyes of God…well…you know.”

I smiled too, biting down on my lip at the same time.  I considered the irony.  I had been a virgin on my wedding night but stayed pure for some time afterwards.  Hadley, though not pure, would still experience her first pleasures with her husband on the night of her wedding.  She would have love from the beginning of her marriage while Branford and I had to find our way to those feelings.

After another embrace, I made my way around the dance floor to where I was supposed to sit at the feasting table.  The minstrels paused in their song, and I watched my husband’s easy smile as he took a step back from Sunniva.  It was good to see him smile as it brightened his face and brought back his youth.

I walked around the table and laid my cloak over the chair where I would sit next to Branford for the feast.  The air in the hall was quite warm on my skin, and the cloak was causing the heat to overwhelm me.  As I smoothed out the fabric, servants began to come from the kitchens to bring forth the food for the feast.

The smell of the roasted meats hit my nose and caused my belly to lurch as I was suddenly reminded of the smell of charred flesh in the practice field outside the castle walls.  The back of my throat burned with the taste of bile as I swallowed hard.  Reaching inside the sleeve of my dress, I fished out a small lace handkerchief and covered my mouth, concerned for a moment that my stomach was going to act against me.  I stilled for a moment, and the feeling passed, so I moved quickly away from the table, opting for drink instead of food.  I walked cautiously toward one of the barrels of mead, nodding to some of the other guests as I passed.

The smell of the strong ales and wines hit me nearly as hard as the scent of the food.  My stomach churned again, and the lace handkerchief in my hands blurred as I stared at it.

“Alexandra!”  I felt Branford’s hands around my middle as he pulled me backwards a few steps to sit upon a nearby chair, holding me sideways in his lap.  My head dropped to his shoulder as the room continued to spin.

“What is wrong with her?” Sunniva asked.  I felt her cool fingers on my cheek.

“I do not know,” Branford replied.  “Alexandra?  Can you speak?”

“Yes,” I mumbled into his shirt.

“What is wrong, my wife?”

“Dizzy,” I replied softly.

“I saw her just as she was beginning to fall,” Branford said.  “I barely caught her in time.”

“Alexandra?  Have you eaten since this morning?”

“I do not think so,” I whispered.  I could hear Sunniva’s questions, and I could answer her though my voice sounded strange in my own ears.

“Ida, fetch some water and fruit,” Sunniva said.

“Of course,” Ida said, and she scurried off toward the table.

“Branford,” Sunniva spoke softly, “do you know where Alexandra’s cloak is?”

“At the table, on her chair,” he replied.

“Fetch it for me, please.”

“I’m not leaving her!” Branford snapped.  “Send someone else.”