"I don't got any." I frowned at the map. "My last captain, he'd probably have gone through the Confederation territory." I didn't mention that's cause he was Confederation. "A risk of a fight versus the guarantee of delay or the sirens, you know? But he liked to fight, too."
"Not sure about fighting," Marjani said. "We have too much–" She stopped and glanced at me real quick out of the corner of her eye, and I knew she was talking about the cargo.
Marjani messed with the map some, tracing an arc around the sirens, up close to the northern lands. Something shivered through me – but I doubted Marjani was taking us anywhere close to the Isles of the Sky. She ain't stupid. And as much as I wanted Naji to cure his curse, I wasn't sure I was ready to face the Isles just yet.
So I watched Marjani work, trying to memorize the movements, the way she used her whole arm as she worked, the little scribbles she took down in her logbook. Her handwriting was curved and soft and learned, and it reminded me of the calligraphy I saw in this book of spells Mama used to keep on her. Not plant-spells – something else. Alchemy. She never talked about it.
"It's the only way," Marjani muttered. "Up north. Curses! Captain's not going to be pleased." She looked up at me. "It'll take us over two weeks off course. Nearly three."
"We got the food for it?"
"We can make do."
I shrugged. "Well, if you don't wanna fight and you don't wanna lose half your crew to drowning, that's probably the only way." I shivered again, but Marjani didn't seem to notice.
"I might be able to shave it down." She wrote some figures in her logbook, crossing them out, scrawling in new ones. When she turned her attention back to the map, I asked if I could take a look.
"At my notes?"
I felt myself go hot, but I got over my pride enough to nod. "I always wanted…" My voice kinda trailed off. Marjani handed the logbook over to me.
"Wanted to learn navigation?"
I nodded.
"It's not terribly hard, once you know the mathematics behind it."
"Most mathematics I ever learned was how to count coins." I wanted to ask her about university, but she was frowning down at the map again. I ran my fingers over the dried ink of the logbook, reading through her scratched-out notes, all those calculations of speed and direction and days lost.
"I might have time to start teaching you," she said, interrupting our silence. Her divider scritch scritch scritched across the map. "Especially with this detour."
I looked hard at the logbook.
"I'd like that," I said. "I'd like that a whole lot."
That night, Naji emerged from the crew's quarters and slunk up on deck. The wind was calm and favorable, pushing us north toward the ice-islands, out of the path of the sirens. The captain had issued the orders to change directions that afternoon, and the crew had scrambled to work without so much as a grunt of complaint. I wondered what would've happened if Marjani had issued the order. Or me.
"Something's different," Naji said, sidling up beside me. I was standing next to the railing, looking out at the black ocean. "We aren't going in the same direction."
"You can tell that?"
"Yes." He frowned. "We were going east, now we're going north. Did you manage to convince them to take us–"
I smacked him hard on the arm. "Are you crazy? Don't say that out loud!" Nobody was near us, though. The crew kept clear of Naji, though they sure saw fit to gossip about him whenever he was hidden away belowdeck.
"And no," I said. "We're still headed for Port Idai. But we're having to detour on account of some sirens."
"Sirens?" Naji stared out at the darkness. "I hate the ocean."
That made me sad. Sure, sirens are a pain in the ass, but how could he not see all the beauty that was out there – the starlight leaving stains of brightness in the water, the salt-kissed wind? I wanted to find a way to share it with him, show him there was more in the world than blood and shadow. The ocean was a part of me – couldn't he see that?
Of course he couldn't. He barely saw me half the time, plain and weatherworn and frizzy-haired.
"How far north is the detour taking us?" he asked.
I shrugged. "A couple weeks out of our way."
"That's not what I asked."
I looked over at him. His face was hard and expressionless. "I ain't sure," I said. "Not so far we have to worry about ice in the rigging."
Naji frowned. "Are you wearing that charm I made you?"
Course I was, though my wearing it didn't have nothing to do with protection. Still, I nodded.
"Good," Naji said. "Don't take it off."
I knew there was something he wasn't telling me, probably something about the Mists, and as much as Naji claimed to hate the ocean he sure seemed content to stare all gloomy at the waves.
"It ain't so bad," I said.
"What isn't?"
"Being out here." I glanced at him. "I know something's got you spooked, but I'm safer here. Ain't been in danger once. So there ain't been no hurt for you."
The wind pushed Naji's hair across his face, peeling it away from his scar.
"You haven't been attacked, that's true." He sighed. "But you spend all day scampering among the ropes like a monkey."
"That hurts?" I was almost offended. I've been messing about in ship's rigging since I was four years old. It's about as dangerous as walking.
"Not really," Naji said. "I get a headache sometimes." He looked at me. "But you could fall."
"In fair weather like this? Not a chance." I frowned.
The water slapped against the side of the boat, misting sea spray across my face and shoulders. The ocean trying to join in on your conversation, Mama always told me. It's her way of giving advice.
Naji let out a long sigh and wiped at his brow with his sleeve. "I'm going back to the crew's quarters."
"Wait."
He actually stopped.
"Listen," I said. "First off, it ain't healthy for you to stay down below so much. You're gonna get the doldrums faster'n a bout of crabs in a whorehouse. Second…" I groped around for the words a bit. "Marjani's gonna teach me navigation, but I don't know none of the math."
"Alright," he said. "What does that have to do with me?"
The words hit me like one of Mama's open-hand slaps. "Because," I said, faltering. "You… you're educated. I thought you could…"
He was staring at me, only his face wasn't stony and angry no more.
"I thought you could help me." I looked down at my feet, my face hot like we were out in the sun. "Marjani's so busy, you know, and I thought – and you spend so much time by yourself."
"Oh." He took a step or two closer to me. He was close enough that I got these little shivers up and down my spine.
"It'd give you something to do," I said.
"Yes." He paused, and I lifted up my head to look at him. He had his eyes on me. They were the same color as the ocean at night. "Mathematics were not my strong suit, I'm afraid."
"You still know more'n me."
"I suppose I do." He took a deep breath. "I would be happy to help you, Ananna."
"Really?"
He nodded.
I hugged him. Just threw my arms around his shoulders without thinking, like he was Chari or Papa or one of the Tanarau crew. I realized what I did quick enough, though, when he stuck his hand on my upper back all awkward, like he wasn't sure what to make of me touching him. I pushed away, dropped my arms to my side. "Sorry," I muttered.
"Your enthusiasm for learning gives me hope for the future," he said. "We can start now, if you'd like. You don't seem to be… working."
"I'm the daytime crew." I squinted. "I thought you wanted to go down below."
He took his time answering. "Well, the air up here is much more pleasant."
"Yeah, never was clear how you could stand the smell."
He looked like he wanted to laugh, but cause he's Naji he didn't.
"We'll need something to write on. And some ink."
"I'll ask Marjani." The whole night seemed brighter now. Naji wasn't glowering no more, and I was about to learn something neither Mama or Papa'd ever saw fit to teach me proper.
Naji nodded at me, and I ran off to the captain's quarters, to find some ink and scraps of sail.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Marjani taught me the basics of navigation in the evenings, mostly, after mealtime when the bulk of the crew was up on deck drinking rum and watching the sun disappear into the horizon line. It was a lot of measuring and taking notes, and at first she just had me work off the records she took so I could learn how to do the calculations. And Naji gave me practice equations during the day, when there wasn't no sailwork for me to do. He came up on deck and everything, and we sat near the bow of the ship while I worked through them.
The crew ignored us the first few days, just went about their business like we weren't there. Then Ataño picked up on us and took to swinging down when I was working, asking me what I was writing for but staring at Naji while he asked.
"Ain't none of your business," I told him, scribbling with Naji's quill. It didn't work no magic for me. Wouldn't even tell me the answers to the equations.
"I dunno, looks like you're charming something." He dropped to his feet and squinted at Naji. "You know magic, fire-face?"
"Ananna's learning mathematics," Naji said.
Ataño howled with laughter, too stupid or too intent on acting the bully to notice that Naji hadn't answered his question. My face turned hot like it had a sunburn but I kept scribbling cause I wanted to learn navigation more than I wanted Ataño to like me.
"The hell?" Ataño asked. "That's even better'n the idea of her writing spells." He laughed again.
"Don't you got deck duty?" I muttered. It was hard to concentrate on the equation with him standing there gaping at me.
"You can't tell me what to do," he said.
"She will once she learns navigation," Naji said, "and you're serving under her colors."
I stopped writing, embarrassed as hell but also a little bit pleased that Naji thought I could be a captain someday.
There was this long pause while Ataño stared at Naji. "She ain't never gonna be my captain."
"Yes, that's probably true," Naji said. "Since I doubt she would require the services of someone as incompetent as you."
I bit my bottom lip to keep from laughing, but then I noticed Ataño staring at Naji with daggers in his eyes. Naji didn't seem to care much, but it occurred to me that we probably shouldn't be stirring up trouble when we were riding on this boat as guests.
Fortunately, the quartermaster stomped up to us and cuffed Ataño on the head before he could say anything more. "Get your ass to work," he said to Ataño, before fixing his glare on me.
"Doing something for Marjani," I said real quick, which was what she'd told me to say if any of the other officers caught me practicing. The quartermaster wrinkled up his brow, but he nodded and sauntered off.
"You shouldn't have said that to Ataño," I told Naji. "You made yourself an enemy just now. You see his eyes?"
"I'm not afraid of children."
I frowned and started working real hard on the next equation so Naji wouldn't see my face. The ink blotted across the sail.
"You're pressing too hard," Naji said.
"I ain't a child," I muttered.
"What?"
"Ataño's the same age as me." I didn't mean to tell him but it came out anyway. "And I ain't a child."
Naji stared at me. I stared back as long as I could but Naji was always gonna win a staring contest. I dropped my gaze back down to the equations. They looked like scribbles, like nonsense.
"You're the same age as him?" he asked.
"Uh, yeah. Seventeen."
This long heavy pause.
"Hmm," Naji said. "I put him at thirteen."
"Oh, shut up. You did not."
"Well, I'd put him at thirteen by his actions. Thirteen or seventeen, it doesn't matter. He can't hurt me." He hesitated. "I won't let him hurt you–"
"Oh please." I tossed the quill and sail scrap down to the deck. "You think I'm scared of Ataño? You really think–"
Then I saw that sparkle in Naji's eye and knew he was laughing at me.
"See?" he said. "Now you know how it feels."
I glared at him for a few seconds. He looked so pleased with himself, but he also looked kind of happy, and that was enough for me to turn my attention back to my equations. I was happy, too, about finally learning navigation, and the possibility that I could become an officer on a ship, which was the first step to having my own boat. And there hadn't been any whispers about the Hariri clan, either. I was starting to see my future again.
As long as I didn't think about the Isles of the Sky. As long as I didn't think on how Naji's curse was an impossible one. Cause I knew that just cause I could see my future again, that didn't mean it was going to happen.
After a while, Naji started coming with me to my lessons with Marjani. He didn't ask – of course he didn't ask – but he did show up at the captain's quarters one evening after dinner looking sheepish. Marjani had me perched over the maps with a divider, tracking a course from Lisirra to Arkuz, the capital city of Jokja, where she told me she had been born. She'd asked me my birthplace but I just said Lisirra, cause the stormy black-sand island where I'd been born wasn't even on the map. And then Naji was banging on the door, asking to come in.
"I hope you don't mind if I join you," he said. "But I find the crew…" He hesitated. Marjani looked like she wanted to laugh.