The Bed and Breakfast Star (5 page)

‘Excuse me,’ I said politely. After all, I’d just been told that manners don’t cost a penny.

‘Come on now, out of here,’ said the big lady, shooing at me as if I was a stray cat. ‘And don’t hang around the reception area either. I’m sick and tired of you kids turning this hotel into a play-park. You go up to your room, do you hear me?’

‘That’s right. Go to your room, little girly,’ said the man in the brown suit, trying to brush all the bitty pink hairs away.

‘But I haven’t
got
a room,’ I said. ‘We’ve only just come here and we don’t know where to go.’

‘Well, why didn’t you
say
?’ said the fluffy pink lady, and she flounced out of the room, beckoning me with one of her long pink fingernails.

Hank was still howling out in the hall. Pippa was whispering and Mum was muttering and Mack was pacing the carpet like a caged animal, looking as if he was ready to bite someone.

‘So
sorry to have kept you waiting,’ said the big lady, and she nipped round the corner of the counter and smiled a big pink lipsticky smile. ‘On behalf of the management, I’d like to welcome you to the Royal Hotel. I hope your stay with us will be a pleasant one.’

‘Well, we’re hardly here on holiday,’ said Mum, wrestling with Hank. She sat him down on the counter to give her arms a rest. Hank perked up a little. He spotted what looked like a very very big pink bunny rabbit and started crawling rapidly towards it, drooling joyfully.

‘Please try to keep your children under control!’ said the big lady, swatting nervously at the advancing baby. ‘I’ll have to process all your particulars.’

This took for ever. Hank howled mournfully, deprived of his cuddle with the giant pink bunny. Mum sighed. Mack tutted and strutted, working himself up into a temper. Pippa started hopping about and holding herself. There was going to be a puddle on the carpet if we didn’t watch out.

‘Mum, Pippa’s needing the toilet,’ I hissed.

‘Shut
up,
Elsa,’ said Pippa, squirming.

Mum cast an experienced eye at Pippa.

‘You’d better take her, Elsa,’ she said.

The big lady paused whilst sorting through our particulars and pointed the way down the hall and round the corner. I took Pippa’s arm and hurried her along. We passed the Manager’s office. His door was ajar. Like my joke.

We had a quick peek at him. He was still sitting at his desk. He’d kicked his shoes off and put his feet up. One of his socks had a hole. His toe stuck through and looked so silly that Pippa and I got the giggles. The Manager heard and looked cross and we scooted quickly down the corridor. We had to dash, anyway, because it was getting a bit dodgy for Pippa to be laughing in her current circumstances.

Things got dodgier still because we seemed to take a wrong turning and blundered around unable to find the toilets. We came across a gang of boys as we rounded a corner. They were busy writing something on the wall with black felt-tip pen.

‘Don’t ask them, they’ll laugh at us,’ said Pippa urgently.

They laughed at us anyway, making rude comments about us as we rushed past. You know the sort of things boys shout out.

‘They are
rude
,’ said Pippa.

They were ruder than Pippa realized. She can’t read yet.
I
read what they were writing on the wall.

We hurried on, turned another corner, and suddenly I saw one of those funny little lady outlines stuck up on the door.

I don’t know why they design the lady in that weird sticky-out frock. And she hasn’t got any arms, poor thing, so she’d have a job using the loo herself, especially when it came to pulling the chain.

I was still busy contemplating this little lady while Pippa charged inside. I heard the door bang shut.

‘Did you make it in time, Pippa?’ I called.

‘Shut
up,’
Pippa called back.

It sounded as if her teeth were gritted. I stepped inside to find out why. There was someone else in the Ladies. A girl about my own age was sitting on the windowsill with her feet propped on the edge of the washbasin. She was reading a book. Well, she had her eyes on the page, but you could tell we were disturbing her a bit.

‘Hello,’ I said.

She nodded at me, looking a bit nervous.

‘I’m Elsa. And that’s my sister Pippa sitting in the toilet.’

‘Don’t keep
telling
everyone!’ Pippa shouted from inside.

‘Sisters!’ I said, raising my eyebrows.

‘Brothers are worse,’ said the girl. ‘I’ve got three.’

‘I’ve got one too. He’s only a baby but he’s still awful. I have to look after him sometimes.’

‘I have to look after my brothers all of the time. Only I get fed up because they keep pestering me. So sometimes I slip in here for a bit of peace.’

‘Good idea. So what’s your name, then?’

‘Naomi.’

‘Hi, Naomi. I’m Elsa.’

‘Yes, you said.’

‘How long have you been here then?’

‘Sitting in the basin?’

‘No! In this place. The hotel.’

‘About six months.’

‘You haven’t! Gosh.’

I was too busy thinking to carry on chatting. I’d thought we’d stay in the hotel a week or two at the most. As if we really were on holiday. I hadn’t realized we might be stuck here for months and months.

Pippa pulled the chain and came out of the toilet. Naomi swung her skinny legs out of the way so that Pippa could wash her hands. There weren’t any towels so I let Pippa wipe her hands on my T-shirt. Naomi settled her feet back again.

I looked at her. I looked at the tap.

‘I could give your feet a little paddle,’ I said.

‘Don’t,’ said Naomi.

I thought about it.

‘No, OK.’

I smiled at her. She smiled back. Things were looking up. I’d only just got here and yet I’d already made a friend.

I took Pippa’s damp hand and we set off back down the corridor.

‘I like that girl,’ said Pippa.

‘That’s my friend. Naomi.’

‘She can be my friend too. I like her hair. All the little plaits. Will you do my hair like that, Elsa?’

‘It looks a bit too fiddly. Come on, quick.’ We were going past the boys again. They said some more rude things. Really awful things.

‘You think you’re so clever, but you can’t even spell,’ I said, snatching the felt-tip. I crossed out the worst word and wrote it correctly.

That showed them. Pippa and I skipped on down the corridor and eventually found our way back to the foyer.

‘There you are! I was beginning to think you’d got lost,’ said Mum.

The big lady was handing over a key to Mack.

‘One room for all five of us?’ said Mack.

‘It’s a family room, with full facilities.’

Mack stared at the number tag.

‘Room six-oh-eight?’

‘That’s right.’

‘That doesn’t mean we’re up on the sixth floor, does it?’

‘You got it.’

‘But we’ve got little kids. You can’t shove us right up at the top, it’s stupid.’

‘It’s the only room available at the moment. Sorry,’ said the big lady, fluffing up her jumper.

‘There is a lift?’ said Mum.

‘Oh yes, there’s a lift,’ said the big lady. ‘Only the kids have been messing around and it’s not working at the moment. We’re getting it fixed tomorrow. Meanwhile, the stairs are over there.’

It took us a long while and several journeys to get us and all our stuff up those stairs.

But at long last we were all crowded into room 608. Our new home.