The Beginning of Us (246 page)

“I’m sorry. Did I upset you?”
How could that have upset her?

“I don’t like to talk about my past, Slade.” Her eyes meet mine and they are full of heartbreak. “I want to know things about you, but I’m not going to dig. I know how it feels to bring up hurtful things from the past, so you can just tell me whatever you feel comfortable with me knowing.”

I sit there and stare at her. I cannot imagine having a past that painful to think about. Growing up, my family was full of love and laughter.

“Well...” I take a quick drink of my wine as she watches me with a small smile on her face. “Josh, Micah, and I have always been close. Growing up we were thick as thieves. Josh and I always snuck out after curfew and would drag Micah along with us.”

She laughs, and it makes me smile. “What would you guys do?’’ She takes another sip of her soup.

“Party. Josh and I would hit a party every weekend in high school, and we’d go looking for them during the week.”

“Vivian and Mark didn’t mind?” she asks as she takes a drink of her wine.

I shake my head. “Not really. As long as we had good grades, they let Micah and I do our own thing.”

“Where did you go to college?”

“I went to University of Missouri for my first four years getting my BA degree, and then I went off to Yale for four more years. Well, actually three years, but then I took some time off to study for the bar.”

She nods her head. “Were you in a fraternity?”

I nod my head solemnly. I now realize what she meant about talking of your past. My days in the fraternity were very dark. The memories I actually have from those days involve endless counts of girls and alcohol. You’ve never been to a real party until you’ve been to one thrown by frat boys. I don’t feel comfortable talking to her about it. I actually feel ashamed at the thought of having to tell her how many girls I once fucked in college.

Thankfully, she understands. “So....there
is
another question I want to ask you,” she says as she pushes her empty bowl over to the side for our waiter to take.

“What’s that?” I smile at the thought of her wanting to know more about me. A different side of me than the one she has heard from other women. I know girls talk, and word gets around fast in this town.

“Your tattoo,” she says slowly. “What does the star mean?”

I laugh and her face relaxes. “I was drunk, and Josh and I decided to go get a tattoo. It doesn’t mean anything. I don’t even remember why I picked a star.” I remember the next morning wondering why I got that rather than a skull or something manly.

We’re both laughing when our waiter comes over to take our plates and sets down our second course.

“Can I ask you another question?” I have to know something that has been digging at me.

“Sure,” she agrees, nodding her head before downing the rest of her wine. I can tell she’s getting nervous with all the questions by the way she’s drinking and the small movements she makes trying to get comfortable in her seat, but there is one that is driving me nuts.

“How many guys had you dated before Jax?”

“None.”

My brows draw together as I think over what she just told me. “None?” I repeat.

“Yeah. He was my first boyfriend,” she nods with a smile.

“How long were you two together?” Micah had told me eight months, but maybe he meant eight years?

“Eight months. We didn’t get together until my senior year of college.” She bends down, taking a bite of her food.

Wait? Does that mean he’s the only guy she has ever slept with? She waited until she was a senior in college to sleep with someone?

She nods her head as if she is reading my mind.

Shit.

Now I’m
really
glad I didn’t tell her about my college experience. I want to ask her why she waited and what was special about Jax for him to be the one she gave it up for?
How could she possibly wait that long?
I mean, I don’t think I know anyone who was out of high school before they had sex with someone. Hell, I was fourteen. Josh was also fourteen. We had gone to a high school party that night and I’m pretty sure every person there fucked someone.

I want to quit talking about sex. For the first time in my life, I’m ashamed at the number of women I’ve slept with. I was always safe though, always. No matter how trashed I got, I never fucked without a condom. I shake my head, and decide to change the subject.

“Did you two ever talk about plans for the future?” I don’t want to think about sex, but I do want to know how far out they were planning for.

Her eyebrows arch, and she looks surprised by my question. “Like marriage?”

“Yeah.”

Her green eyes are looking into mine, but I feel like she’s really not seeing me. Like she is remembering something; something painful. She takes a deep breath.

“We had discussed our future once. We were going to get married one day and have children.” She continues looking straight at me as she lifts her wine glass a few inches off of the table. “I’m just glad that he did what he did before we went that far.”

I nod my head. “I’m sorry.”

She blinks, snapping out of whatever she was remembering. “Why are you sorry?” She smiles.

“For what he did to you.” I don’t know how any man could hurt this beautiful angel.

“It was for the best. I’ve come to realize that what I felt for him was not the kind of love I’m looking for.”

A huge smile spreads across my face, knowing that she is over him. “Do you have any other family members?”

She moves her food around on her plate and looks up at me. “No.”

I put my fork down, and stare into her green eyes. “No one?” I hate that I’m bringing up bad memories of her past.

“My dad had a brother, but he had a heart attack and passed away.” She puts her fork down, looking at the table.

“Your mom’s side?” I ask quietly.

“She was an only child, like me.”

“Done, sir?” the waiter asks as he comes to bring us new glasses of wine.

“Yes, thank you,” I answer, handing him my plate. I keep my face expressionless as I watch Angel take a big drink of her wine. “I’m sorry.” I reach out, taking her hand in mine on the table.

She sets her glass down. “What for?”

“For bringing up your hurtful past. I just want to know everything about you.” I smile, hoping it will lighten then mood and she won’t be mad at me.

“Don’t be.” She pats my hand, then pulls away to continue eating her filet of beef.

“What about you? You said you have never had a girlfriend. Why is that?”

I shrug, not wanting to tell her the truth. How do you explain that you prefer to fuck around and not have to put someone before yourself to someone so selfless and loving? She nods her head as if she understands me. I know I want something more with her, and that we are going to need complete honesty and trust. I take a deep breath, hoping that what I’m about to tell her doesn’t make her run from me.

“Angel.” She looks up at me with a small smile on her face. “I’ve never been in a relationship because I never felt the need to have anything more than a one night stand. I never wanted to be with one woman,” I shrug.

She smiles, surprising me. “I understand, Slade. You don’t have to explain it to me. I’m sorry I was such a...well, mean to you when I first met you. I’m not really like that.”

“I know.”

The waiter comes back with our sage ice cream. “Mmm, this looks delicious.” I nod my head as we both dig in.

I don’t eat much of my ice cream as I silently sit back in my seat and watch her from across the table. She closes her eyes slightly, and every now and then her pink tongue comes out and slowly licks her lips. I know she’s starting to feel the alcohol and it makes me chuckle to myself. It doesn’t surprise me, though. She has such a small frame that it doesn’t take much to affect her.

I look away from her as the waiter approaches the table. “Check, sir.” He places the check on the table.

Angel reaches down for her purse on the floor. “Here, let me get it.”

“No.” I laugh at her. “Absolutely not.” She reaches for it, but I grab it first. I will
never
let her pay for dinner.

“Thank you,” she says sweetly.

“Are you ready?” I ask.

“Yes.” I stand up and reach out my hand to her. She takes it as she stands and I walk us out of the restaurant.

I kiss her before opening the passenger door for her. “You’re welcome, Angel.”

I can tell she’s tipsy and I can’t help but laugh at her. I text my brother and we head towards Main Street.

On the way to downtown, I recall stories of Micah and I growing up, while her laughter grows louder every time. Her laugh makes me smile like a fucking idiot.

And I love it.

“Well, shit. I was hoping there would be a parking place out front. Guess we’ll have to park in the back.” As I try to find a place to park, I see Holly and Micah getting out of his Ford truck. They start to walk towards my CTS, when I find a spot just a few down from them.

“Damn, this place is pretty packed already,” Micah says as he greets us.

“Yes, well it is a Saturday.” I go to open Angel’s door, but she’s already climbing out, and laughing. I have a feeling we won’t be here long.

“What’s so funny, girl?” Holly asks as she walks over to her.

“Slade told me about the time he dressed up Micah in Vivian’s pink bathrobe and put lipstick on him.” She’s laughing so hard that she’s almost crying. “And how Micah paraded around the house...” laughs some more, “letting Vivian take pictures of him.” Holly starts laughing with her.

“Dude, you told her that?” Micah says, laughing with the girls. I just shrug my shoulders and take Angel by the hand, leading her to the entrance of the bar.

As soon as we walk in, everyone turns and looks at us. I know why they’re looking; I have never shown up at a bar with a woman, and I sure as hell have never held a women’s hand. Groping one in the corner, or getting caught with my pants down in the bathroom, those are the kind of things I get seen doing.

I don’t want people to get the wrong impression of Angel, so I turn her to face me. I place both of my hands on either side of her soft face and kiss her. As I kiss her, I pull her body closer to mine and she moans in my mouth.
Fuck, I can’t get enough of that sound from her!
I pull away, remembering that I want people to understand she means something more to me than just bar trash.

“Go find a table with Holly while Micah and I get us some drinks.” I kiss her on her forehead before she walks off.

When we reach the bar, we recognize a guy we’d gone to high school with. “Hey, Matt.”

Matt played football with me throughout high school, but we fought a few times our senior year. He was always pissing me off.

“Hey, Slade, Micah.” He tilts his head toward us. “Who’s the flavor of the week? She’s hot.” I notice he’s staring at Angel’s ass.

“It’s not like that,” I try to explain she means more, but he thinks I mean something different.

“Oh, so she’s just the flavor for the night. Don’t mind if I go get her number so that I can have her tomorrow, do you?”

“What the fuck did you just say?”

“Or maybe you could share, and I’ll just have my fill with her tonight as well. She looks like she wouldn’t mind taking us both. She seems pretty drunk.” I move to punch him in the face, but Micah stops me, pulling my arm back as he speaks to Matt.

“Hey, dude, calm down. She’s with Slade. If you mention sharing her again, I’ll punch you myself.” I was proud of my little brother, but all his talking wasn’t working.

“With Slade?” he laughs. “No girl Slade fucks is ever off limits.” He continues to stare at her ass.

I need to make myself clear.