‘I told you she’d forget what day this is,’ Davy said, nudging Millie in the ribs. ‘I win.’
Still smiling, but puzzled, Eliza looked from one to the other. ‘Win what? What have I forgotten?’
Millie kissed her on the cheek. ‘It’s your birthday, silly. You’re so busy with your business that you’ve even forgotten what day it is. You’re twenty today, Liza. Really, really grown-up. Happy birthday.’
From behind his back, Davy produced a slightly wilted bunch of jewel-bright asters. ‘Happy birthday, Liza. Here, best put these in water. They’ve come all the way from Ilford, picked fresh this morning so the coster told me.’
‘Ta. They’re lovely.’ Eliza buried her face in the spice-scented petals, and for no apparent reason, she felt tears welling up in her eyes.
‘Give them to me and I’ll put them in water.’ Millie held out her hand. ‘They’ll brighten up the counter a treat.’
Eliza swallowed hard, shaking her head. ‘It’s all right, dear. I’ll see to them. You’d better open up the back door for Arnold. He should be loading up the wagon and you need to check the goods or he’ll be sure to leave something behind.’
‘Work, work, work,’ Millie called cheerfully, as she made her way to the back of the store. ‘Can’t you ever take a day off?’
Eliza turned away to search for a suitable container for the flowers but Davy caught her by the hand, holding it and looking into her eyes with a frown wrinkling his forehead. ‘She’s right, Liza. You never take a day off. You work too hard, girl.’
‘And who would run the shop if I wasn’t here?’ She went to pull her hand away but Davy held it in a firm grasp.
‘There’s more to life than making money. When did you last have a bit of fun, Liza? Come to think of it, I can’t remember the last time I saw you laugh.’
‘Don’t talk soft. What’s got into you today?’ Eliza jerked her hand free and turned on her heel, walking to the back of the shop where she found a slightly battered tin jug. ‘Keep an eye on the shop for a minute, will you, Davy? While I fetch some water from the pump.’ Suddenly she needed to get out of the store and away from the spectres of the past that haunted every nook and
cranny. It was stiflingly hot in the yard, the stinking, fly-ridden heat of August that wrapped itself around the city in a suffocating hug.
Arnold had almost finished hefting the goods onto a hired wagon. He touched his cap and grinned when he saw her, but he carried on with his work. Millie was leaning over a large barrel with the order book spread out before her; she looked up, chewing the tip of her pen. ‘You could be nicer to Davy, you know.’
Eliza tut-tutted as the water gushed from the pump, splashing her full skirt. ‘I dunno what you mean.’
‘He got up at crack of dawn to walk to market and get them flowers just for you. And he’s hired a private room at Paddy’s Goose tonight. It’s supposed to be a surprise party and he’s been saving up for months to pay for it. If you don’t turn up, Liza, I’ll never speak to you again. I mean it.’
With cold water overflowing from the jug and spilling onto her boots, Eliza stared at Millie, momentarily stunned by this angry outburst. Such heated words, and the tone in which they were delivered, were as shocking as hearing a tiger’s roar coming from the mouth of a kitten. ‘I don’t want no fuss,’ she said, shaking out her damp skirts. ‘I’m not much of a one for parties.’
‘No, you go around with a long face, or else you got your head stuck in a ledger or studying
the shipping news and thinking of business. You never think that there’s others what might like to have some fun, or give you a bit of a laugh. You treats poor Davy like he don’t matter, when you must know that he – he loves you with all his big, stupid heart.’ Bursting into tears, Millie threw the pen onto the ground and ran sobbing into the storeroom.
‘What’s up with her?’ Arnold stood in the gateway, scratching his head and frowning. ‘Have I done wrong, missis?’
‘No, no, not you, Arnold. It’s me. I’m afraid I’ve upset her.’
‘You never said you wasn’t coming to the party?’ Arnold stopped short, clamping his hand across his mouth. ‘Bugger it! I wasn’t supposed to tell.’
‘Never mind, I know all about the surprise party. Just go on the delivery.’ Picking up the book that Millie had abandoned, Eliza took out the copy of the ship’s order and handed it to Arnold. ‘You can do this one on your own, Arnold. I’m sure I can trust you.’
He stared down at the piece of paper and a slow smile spread across his face. ‘Don’t worry, missis,’ he said, tapping his forehead. ‘I got it all up here.’ Chuckling to himself, he shambled out of the yard and climbed up onto the wagon.
Eliza hurried back into the shop looking for Millie, only to find that Ted had just arrived and
was ranting at his two young apprentices for being late. Dippy Dan stood in the doorway, sucking his thumb and shaking with fear, even though the tirade was not directed at him personally. Glancing at the clock on the wall, Eliza saw that they were on time, but it was no use trying to argue with Ted in one of his strange moods. Of late he had been subject to sudden, violent tempers that came seemingly from nowhere and left him angry and shaking for some time after. She had put these attacks down to his fears that steam engines were taking the place of sail, and might soon put him out of business. In the evenings, after supper, Ted often sat with his pipe clenched between his teeth, staring into the middle distance, or went out for long walks on his own, returning long after Millie and Eliza had put Dolly to bed. Then, of course, there was Dolly’s gradual slide into a fantasy world where the entire royal family were her bosom friends. Her delusions were child-like and harmless and she appeared to be happy in her world inhabited by imaginary companions, but Ted was deeply upset by her ramblings and had little or no patience with her. He blamed the medicine that Freddie had prescribed, and on which she had become totally dependent. Eliza had tried to wean her gradually off the laudanum-based elixir, but without it Dolly became frantic, complaining of
stomach cramps, cold sweats and terrifying nightmares.
All this flashed through Eliza’s mind as she saw Ted’s lined face contort with pain. He had a grey tinge to his skin, and his eyes were bulging from his head with a wild, unfocused look. He shook his fist at the two boys, who scrambled up the ladder into the sail loft. ‘Get on up there. I’ll deal with you later. And you, you stupid bugger, Dippy. I dunno why I keep you on, you useless good-for-nothing.’
Dan lumbered after them, shivering and muttering to himself as he climbed the ladder.
Eliza set the jug of water on the counter. ‘Don’t get yourself so upset, Dad.’
‘Them young beggars, idle sods the pair of them. I’ve a mind to give them a good thrashing.’
She laid her hand on his shoulder. ‘Don’t carry on like this. They’re just boys and they’re not late, at least not more than a couple of minutes.’
Ted turned on her, his normally mild countenance twisted into an angry scowl. ‘Are you arguing with me, miss? Haven’t I taught you nothing in all the years you’ve been under me roof?’
Eliza thought for a moment he was going to strike her; she modified her tone. ‘I’m not arguing, I’m just suggesting that you calm down a bit.’
The slap echoed around the empty shop,
bringing Davy sliding down the ladder, and Millie popped up from behind a set of shelves, wide-eyed and trembling.
Clasping her hand to her cheek, Eliza stared in disbelief at Ted. Never, in all the years she had been in his care, had he ever raised his voice to her in this way, let alone struck her.
‘Liza, are you all right?’ Pushing Ted aside, Davy took Eliza by the shoulders, tipping her head back so that he could examine her cheek. He turned on Ted in a fury. ‘What the bleeding hell d’you think you’re doing, old man? There was no need for that.’
‘Don’t shout at him,’ Millie cried, rushing forward to support Ted’s swaying figure. ‘Can’t you see he’s been took poorly?’
Eliza hurried to help Millie as she guided Ted to a chair. He slumped down, holding his head in his hands and trembling as if he were having some kind of seizure. Before Eliza could stop him, Davy had picked up the jug of water and tipped it over his head.
The effect was instantaneous and Ted stared up at him, with a look of utter confusion on his face. ‘What happened?’
‘You took a swim, you old bugger,’ Davy said angrily. ‘After you’d slapped Eliza in the face. What the hell got into you, I’d like to know.’
‘Don’t,’ Eliza said. ‘I don’t think he knew what he was doing.’
Ted jumped to his feet, glaring at them all in turn. ‘What’s up with you all? You’re talking rubbish, boy. I’d never hit Liza.’
Eliza bit her lip. Fear knotted her stomach as she exchanged worried glances with Davy. ‘It’s all right, Dad,’ she said, making a huge effort to sound calm. ‘It was nothing, you mustn’t worry about it.’
‘I’m not worried. I’m fine. It’s you lot who are out of order.’ Stomping past them with an irascible shake of his head, Ted made for the ladder to the sail loft.
Millie began to cry softly, covering her face with her hands. ‘What’s wrong with everyone today? It should be a nice day for Liza’s birthday but it’s all spoiled.’
‘No, of course it isn’t,’ Eliza said, with a conviction that she did not feel. Something was terribly wrong with Ted, but it was no use burdening Millie with her worries. ‘Maybe we’ll have a bit of a party tonight, after work. How about that?’
‘Now why didn’t I think of that?’ Ruffling Millie’s hair, Davy smiled at Eliza. ‘Seems like a good idea to me, though. Cheer up, nipper.’
Millie turned and ran behind one of the stands of shelves.
‘What did I say?’
‘Oh Davy, you treat her like a kid.’
‘She is a kid.’
Ted’s voice from above put a stop to any argument that might have developed. ‘Get up here, Davy. I’m not paying you to stand around chatting.’
‘I tell you, Liza. The old man’s going mad and I can’t stand much more of it. If he don’t stop treating me like I was still an apprentice, I’m going to sign on for a sea voyage.’
The last thing that Eliza felt like was a party in the White Swan, or Paddy’s Goose as it was known by the locals. On a normal day she would have stayed on at the chandlery long after everyone else had left. This was her quiet time when she could count the day’s takings and lock them away in the iron box that Enoch had kept hidden beneath the counter. Having done that and entered everything in the ledger, she always checked that all the doors were locked and that all the lamps and candles had been extinguished. But today had been unlike any other day and Davy had insisted that she left early, even though the apprentices and Dippy Dan were still finishing off a bit of work in the sail loft. He had persuaded her that the lads were quite capable of locking the door on their way out and that Dan, although he was not the sharpest knife in the box, could be relied upon to stay there and ensure that everything was left as it should be. Reluctantly, Eliza had allowed Davy to walk her home.
One way or another, it had been a thoroughly upsetting day from start to finish and the thought of a party in the pub was more depressing than exciting. But Millie and Davy had their hearts set on celebrating her birthday and how could she explain to them that it was at this time of year when she missed Bart and Freddie the most. How could she tell any of them that it was on her birthday that she felt the loss of her mother and father all the more keenly? Even though Dolly and Ted had been the best of surrogate parents, and she loved Millie with all her heart, they were not blood relations. If she were to tell the truth, she would have liked to be quiet this evening instead of the centre of attention: sometimes, just occasionally, it would be nice to have some time to herself, when she could think and remember her lost loved ones without everyone fussing round and trying to cheer her up.
At home in Hemp Yard, everyone seemed determined that she would have a splendid time and even Dolly had seemed to rally a little. Ada, who now came round every day to help take care of Dolly, had dressed her in her best print gown and had even managed to tame her cloud of white hair into a knot at the back of her head, although stray wisps kept popping out, giving her head the appearance of a dandelion clock. She chattered excitedly, making little
sense, and Eliza automatically agreed with everything that she said; it was easier than trying to bring her confused mind back into the real world.
Millie had put on her best dress and tied ribbons in her hair; her cheeks were flushed and her eyes sparkling with excitement. She kept running to the window every time there was the rumble of a cart in the street outside or the sound of hobnails on cobbles.
‘Four white horses,’ Dolly said, looking up expectantly. ‘Are they bringing me carriage now, Eliza?’
‘There’s no carriage, Mum,’ Millie said, casting an anxious glance at Eliza.
‘But we are going to the palace, aren’t we?’ Dolly’s bottom lip wobbled as if she were about to cry. ‘We are going to see the queen?’
‘That’s right, we’re going to see the queen,’ Eliza said, wrapping Dolly in her shawl.
‘What’s that about the queen?’ Ted came downstairs, struggling with his collar stud. ‘What’s she on about now? Help me, Liza. I can’t do up this damn stud.’
Dolly rocked backwards and forwards in her chair, pointing her finger at Ted and giggling. ‘He can’t go to the palace looking like that. The queen won’t let him in. Pussycat, pussycat where have you been? I’ve been to London to look at the queen.’
‘If you can’t say something sensible, woman, keep your stupid remarks to yourself.’
‘Don’t,’ Eliza said, attempting to fix the collar onto the stud. ‘You know she can’t help it, Dad.’
Dolly smiled up at them and began to sing the nursery rhyme in a tuneless falsetto. Ted turned his back on her, glaring at Eliza. ‘She’s gone barmy and I can’t stand it. Where’s my Dolly gone? I don’t know that mad woman sitting there.’
‘Hush, now. She’ll hear you.’ Somehow Eliza managed to secure the stud even though Ted was jerking his head this way and that. She cast a beseeching glance at Millie. ‘Go outside and see if they’re coming.’