The Breaking Point
“The Breaking Point
is compelling and strikingly honest. This story touches the heart and gives hope for struggling marriages. Karen Ball writes with clarity, depth, and power. It’s a pleasure to recommend this engaging and memorable book.”
R
ANDY
A
LCORN, BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF
S
AFELY
H
OME
“The Breaking Point
goes beyond superb and engrossing—which it most certainly is—and enters the realm of heart-changing, life-altering fiction. Karen Ball has penned a modern classic and given us two unforgettable characters to root for. This is an author to watch!”
R
OBIN
L
EE
H
ATCHER, BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF
F
IRSTBORN AND
P
ROMISED TO
M
E
“With soul-searing honesty and commendable courage, Karen Ball dares to lift the veil on a Christian marriage where two hearts are struggling to become one.
The Breaking Point
is must-reading for any couple seeking God’s ideal in this wonderful covenant we know as marriage.”
A
NGELA
E
LWELL
H
UNT, AUTHOR OF
T
HE
S
HADOW
W
OMEN
“This is a novel with purpose! Karen Ball honestly explores marriage in all of its complexity and sometimes hidden glory.”
G
ARY
T
HOMAS, AUTHOR OF
S
ACRED
M
ARRIAGE
“Gut-wrenching in its honesty and passion,
The Breaking Point
packs a powerful message of obedience and God’s healing.”
B
RANDILYN
C
OLLINS, BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF
C
OLOR THE
S
IDEWALK FOR
M
E
AND
E
YES OF
E
LISHA
“Karen Ball’s vulnerable, clear voice rings true in a story that will bring you face-to-face with the reality of a struggling marriage and the Father’s insistent, inexhaustible grace. Authentic and revealing, this book is not to be missed.”
D
EBORAH
B
EDFORD, AUTHOR OF
A MORNING LIKE THIS
“An honest, heartfelt novel about the craggy recesses of marriage—where God does some of His best work. Karen Ball’s writing is emotionally gripping and full of insight.”
J
AMES
S
COTT
B
ELL, AUTHOR OF
A G
REATER
G
LORY
“In
The Breaking Point
, Karen Ball exposes the painful, honest truth of marriage: It’s hard work. This story of lives out of control, love misplaced, and the wounds we often give each other in the name of righteous direction is carefully balanced with God’s love, hope, and ministry of reconciliation. Although fiction, this powerful read is anything but. I highly recommend this book.”
T
RACIE
P
ETERSON, BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF THE
D
ESERT
R
OSE SERIES AND
E
YES OF THE
H
EART
“The Breaking Point is not only a powerful story for everyone to read, it’s a blueprint for those who want to take their marriages to a more Christlike level, for ailing and struggling marriages, and for helping couples to be prepared for the hard times.”
L
AURAINE
S
NELLING, BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF
T
HE
H
EALING
Q
UILT
AND
T
HE
R
ED
R
IVER OF THE
N
ORTH SERIES
“Karen Ball is one of my favorite authors. Her stories combine humor, poignancy, and a solid biblical background for page-turning novels.
The Breaking Point
merges all of Karen’s strengths into a beautifully written story of love and redemption.”
L
ORI
C
OPELAND, AUTHOR OF
B
RIDES OF THE WEST
:
F
AITH
, J
UNE
, H
OPE
, G
LORY
,
AND
R
UTH
“I finished
The Breaking Point
at 3
A.M.
with tears in my eyes. What a wonderful testimony of God’s power to heal even the most complicated of relationships. Karen Ball beautifully illustrates the truth that love is a decision and that a relationship with God offers hope for every broken dream. Every married couple and certainly every newlywed should read this book.”
D
EBORAH
R
ANEY, AWARD-WINNING AUTHOR OF
A
FTER THE
R
AINS
AND
A S
CARLET
C
ORD
This book is dedicated with love and gratitude to my husband, Don.
I wasted so many years wishing you were different—more this, less that. I’m sorry it took me so long to stop looking at you—or at myself—and finally look to the Master. But I’m grateful that when I did so, He opened my eyes and heart to the truth: His plans are perfect. He’s made two stubborn, willful souls one in ways I never imagined.
Don, you fought the good fight, you stood firm in the face of great opposition, and by God’s grace and your determination, you’ve become a man of honor and integrity, a man after God’s own heart.
You’ve made me a better woman, a better Christian, and a better person. You’ve shown me the true meaning of love. What a miracle to call you
beloved
and
friend.
Thank you for persevering.
I love you with all my heart.
CKNOWLEDGMENTS
A WISE FRIEND AND GIFTED WRITER, ROBIN JONES GUNN
, once said that when we write the books that stem from our truest passion, we find ourselves “floating on a sea of reluctant transparency.” That’s certainly true of this book.
This story is different from any I’ve written before. I put off writing it, in part because I knew I wasn’t ready, but also because I was afraid. I didn’t want to go through the emotions I knew were waiting for me if I gave in. But God is even more stubborn than I, and He made it abundantly clear that the time had come to testify to what He has done in my marriage. In my life.
I worried that reliving the dark times would harden my heart toward Don. But God is so faithful! The complete opposite happened. As I wrote, a sense of wonder and gratitude came over me. Wonder that Don and I share the love we do today, considering where we were not so long ago. Gratitude that God helped us endure so we could know this time, this delight, of who we’ve become as individuals and as a couple.
Beauty for ashes. That’s what God promises us. And it’s true. He’s taken the ashes of my willful dreams and stubborn expectations and given me more beauty than I ever imagined.
I pray this story will help any who may be stumbling along the rocky path of marital discord. But when a story is based, even in part, on the writer’s own life, she runs the risk of losing the universal message in a tangle of personal details. To avoid that, while some facets of this story stem from the events of my own life and marriage, it is a compilation of many stories, many lives, many marriages, many struggles. (For example, I’ve never been pregnant and Don has never had or considered an affair.)
Thank you to those of you who shared with me the cost of persevering; the battles to survive in a world that calls us to self-love rather than God’s love; the struggles to resist the oh-so-appealing cry of “God can’t want you to be this unhappy.” I’ve found strength
through each of you, through hearing what God has done when it seemed nothing
could
be done. Thank you for bearing witness to a Power that goes beyond our weakness and turns despair to hope, anger to joy, destruction to restoration.
Many people were there for Don and me through our journey. You all helped in ways both big and small, but some have been a constant support. God used you to keep us faithful to the vows we took nearly twenty-four years ago, and we thank you. My special gratitude to:
My dad and mom, Fred and Paula Sapp, and my two brothers, Kevin and Kirk. What would I have done without you? When I was a kid, I thought all families were like ours. Now I realize what an amazing gift our family is. You are my most treasured friends. During those terrible, painful days, you were my anchor and my resting place. You still are. I thank God for you every day.
My sweet sister-in-law, Lyn. Your quiet wisdom and loving heart bring Proverbs 16:24 to life. I’m so glad you’re a part of our family.
Our beloved church family at the Advent Christian Church in Medford, Oregon. You’ve known and encouraged me all my life and you accepted Don without reservation. Even in the hardest of times, you showed us both a pure, sincere love. You are the true picture of the body of Christ, and I love each of you more than I can say.
Len, spiritual mentor, shepherd, soldier for the Master, heart friend. You spoke hard truths, brother, when I needed to hear them, even at the risk of our friendship. You followed the Master’s call into battle because you knew what mattered most wasn’t my happiness but my obedience. Thank you for letting Him use you so wisely and so well. I love you.
Julee and Peggy, my heart sisters. How you’ve enriched my
life! Thank you for all the times you listened to my sorrow, accepted my anger and despair, and let God’s light of truth shine clear in your counsel. I count myself among the most blessed of women because you are my friends.Our Illinois Bible study group. You saw us at our worst and still accepted and loved us. We became our best in great part because of the way you stood beside us and held us accountable.
Don’s family. You’ve been there for each other, supported and loved each other, no matter what. Mom, you raised some wonderful kids, and I’m especially grateful for the hand you had in making Don the kind of man who wouldn’t give up, either on himself or on me; Sheryl and Arden, you opened your home and hearts to us, and both were a blessed haven. Thank you, dear sister and brother; Doug, you have such a special place in our hearts. You understood us as few have and you helped us stand; and Guy, you gave guidance and support without reserve.
Thank you for taking me into your family, for taking us into your hearts, for giving us a safe place to fall apart, and for helping us rebuild.
Francine and Rick Rivers. You told us, over and over, that God is sufficient, no matter what. In the darkest of times you called us to stay the course and promised it was worth it. You were right on all counts.
Ken Petersen. You upheld us both, never taking sides. That was a precious gift.
Our River Glen church family. God used a moment of brokenness to draw us back into Christian fellowship (thank you, David, for your honesty!), and we found such delight among you. Thank you for being transparent and for being true to His call.
Our counselor, Steve Hoffmann. What an amazing, godly man you are. I doubt we would have survived as
individuals, let alone as a couple, without you. You saw through the masks and barriers into our very hearts. And you drew us from desperation and anger into a relationship that overflows with God’s promise and delight. I didn’t think it was possible; you never believed it wasn’t. Thank you, Steve. We owe you. Big-time.
To each of you, words can never express the depth of my gratitude for what you did, what you said, and for being there when we needed you. May God bless you richly.
Finally, a special word of thanks to the woman who, in so many ways, made me who I am: my mom, Paula Sapp. I miss you. So much. I wish you were here to read this, because you’re as much a part of the story as anyone. You were the most amazing gift, the most wonderful mother. I’ve never known a woman who could love like you did. You were there any time I needed you. All those times my world turned upside down, your voice on the phone set things right again. You listened without judging; you loved without reservation. I still can’t believe you’re gone, Mom. Life isn’t the same. Never will be again. So I’m looking forward more than I can say to eternity and to seeing you again. My fondest hope is that I spend these years without you making you really, really proud. I love you.