The two new customers, one with bratty kids, who’d entered the premises since he’d picked up his fork.
The husband and wife two booths over, arguing over the price of a new minivan and whether the van should be blue or gray.
Black got too dirty. No, white got too dirty. Quinton briefly entertained the thought of helping them gain a more expansive
understanding of the word
dirty.
The pretty waitress wearing a white halter top who smiled as she passed his table. She found him interesting. Handsome. A
real gentleman, judging by his appearance and his posture. He knew this not only by her look, but because women always commented
on these admirable traits. This particular woman, whose name tag identified her as Karen with a
C,
or Caren, was also likely attracted to his tall frame. They said size didn’t matter, but most women had preferences when
it came to size. Caren liked large men.
There was a single fly caught in the window to his right.
A hundred other stimuli had been trapped by his brain as he contemplated the fork. Not the least of which was the aromatic
steam rising off his charbroiled steak.
Quinton held his fork in his left hand with one finger on the bridge to steady it. He sliced through the tender meat with
a serrated blade, one provided by Jonathan Elway, the famed Denver Bronco quarterback who, based on Quinton’s research three
days earlier when he’d carefully selected the restaurant for this occasion, had indeed been a favorite among all of God’s
children.
Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
A man with enviable strength and intelligence, able to hurl an inflated leather sack through the air with such accuracy and
power that few defenders could see it coming, much less stop it from reaching its intended receiver.
On his God-given field, Jonathan Elway, known to the rest of the world as John Elway, had been a god. He didn’t mistakenly
think of himself as a god, like most humans desperate to live out their pathetic fantasies did. He actually
was
a god, something he himself likely didn’t know.
Quinton placed the first bite of meat into his mouth, pulled the tender morsel off using his teeth, and closed his eyes. The
taste was heavenly. The seared crust gave way with a faint crack to the moist fibers beneath. Juice flooded his mouth and
pooled under his tongue as he sank his molars deep into the flesh.
So delectable and satisfying, he allowed himself a soft moan. Two more chews with his eyes still closed to shut out all other
visual stimuli. The pleasure demanded more vocalized appreciation. Whispering this time.
“Mmmm… Mmmm… Delicious.”
It was important not to be plastic. Pretending to himself only minimized who he was. Most humans wore a public facade, an
attempt to compensate for their own flaws and weaknesses. The whole world was plastic, populated by people playing roles,
fooling only the foolish. Sadly, they’d worn the facades for so long that they had lost even their awareness of the habit.
I am an important executive who has made money—the Rolex label on my wrist should make that clear.
I am a powerful lover and provider, signified by the way I’ve engineered my body to appear strong and symmetrically lumpy.
I am comfortable with myself, signified by the way I walk so nonchalantly wearing only sweats and a T-shirt.
I am nobody. But please, please don’t tell anyone.
The voice of the bratty boy, who was now seated across the room in a booth, scraped at Quinton’s mind. He fought back a grimace
of frustration. It was important not to be plastic, but it was also important not to step on the sanctity of others’ space.
The boy was upsetting the balance of peace and tranquility in the room. No doubt, every last patron would readily shove a
sock or boot down the boy’s throat if they were not so afraid of being found out for who they really were.
He shut the boy out and focused on the cavalcade of flavors dancing around in his mouth. He began to chew with powerful strokes
of his jaw, drawing the juices into his mouth and throat. Swallowing deep.
The details of his earlier activity, which he was now celebrating by breaking an otherwise strict vegetarian diet, slipped
through his mind. His special time with Caroline had been satisfying in the same way all great accomplishments were rewarding.
But he’d drawn no physical pleasure from the bloodletting.
Eating the steak, however… This was indeed like sex. And because Quinton had not known any sexual gratification since that
terrible night seven years earlier, he relished every other physical pleasure that reminded him that physical pleasure was
indeed an immeasurable gift.
News of Caroline’s death would soon fill the world with a single question:
Who is it? Who is it? Is it my neighbor, is it the grocery clerk, is it the high school principal?
Humans were predictable. Like animated carbon units. Cardboard cutouts with fancy trim, far too much of it. There was only
one human who really mattered, and at the moment that was him. Everything around him was stage dressing. He was the only real
player on this stage.
The audience was watching him only; the rest were only extras. It was the same for all of them, but few were courageous enough
to understand or confess this single beautiful, bitter truth: Deep down inside, each of them believed they were at the center
of the universe.
But at the moment, it was Quinton, and he was wise enough to embrace it.
God had chosen Quinton Gauld. Simple. Indisputable. Final.
Which brought Quinton to the task set before him. Three more, as he saw fit. Ending with the most beautiful.
The boy in the booth was whining his dislike for peas. A perfectly good vegetable, but this dark-headed boy who looked to
be about ten or eleven was refusing to consider reason, in part because the father wasn’t delivering reason, but distraction.
“How about ice cream, Joshie? How about lobster, Joshie?”
Quinton cut off more meat and savored the bite. So delicious. Rarely had he drawn such pleasure from meat. But the boy was
undermining the experience, and Quinton felt regression pressing in on his psyche.
Joshie
was mad as hell and there seemed no good reason for it. The boy was simply misfiring. Going kaput. Rotting before his time
in the grave.
Few things distracted Quinton any longer. He’d long ago conquered his mind. A doctor had once diagnosed him with schizoaffective
disorder, a condition that supposedly involved the complications of thought disorder and a bipolar mood disorder. Five years
of his life had vanished in a fog of heavy medication, until he silently protested the oppression.
The condition was his greatest gift, not a disease. He still took a very low dosage of medication to control the tics—a natural
by-product of a supercharged mind—but otherwise he relied on his own substantial focus and enlightenment.
At the moment, it took every fiber of his formidable intellect to remain calm. The square of seared cow flesh in his mouth
was tasting more like cardboard than meat. After his significant accomplishment earlier today, the heavens were cheering,
but the rats on earth were totally oblivious. There was no respect left in the world.
The father suggested that Joshie take a time-out to think about it, and the boy raced screaming to the restroom. None of the
others seemed too put out by the scene.
The whole mini-drama was more than Quinton was willing to bear. He calmly set down his knife and dabbed his lips with his
serviette seven times, alternating corners, a habit that helped to bring order to his mind. He took one more deep draft of
the purified water, slipped a hundred-dollar bill onto the table, and stood.
With a nod and smile at the waitress who wanted him, he walked toward the restroom.
It was important not to stand out in a crowd while simultaneously living a nonplastic life. An authentic life. Authentic,
but not proud and obnoxious, either. That was the boy’s problem: He was standing out in the crowd, acting as if he were a
coddled king who ate ice cream while the rest of the kingdom was subjected to peas.
Quinton’s problem, on the other hand, was how to enlighten the boy without making the same mistake and drawing attention.
He neither wanted nor needed the spotlight, particularly not now.
He walked into the bathroom with a backward glance, noting that no one else was hurrying to relieve themselves of dinner or
drink. The door closed with a soft clunk. The boy faced the urinal, uttering a long, mournful wail that might be expected
at a funeral procession, but not here after being offered ice cream.
Eager to deliver his message quickly, Quinton walked to the stalls, checked both to be sure they were alone, then approached
the boy.
He tapped Joshie on the shoulder. The boy was zipping up, and he spun with a short gasp, swallowing his annoying cry.
“Why are you crying, lad?” Quinton asked.
Joshie got over his initial shock and flattened his mouth. “Mind your own business,” he said. Then he made to walk past Quinton.
Quinton knew it now: The boy was deeply disturbed. Perhaps mentally ill, though more likely just rotten to the core. An intervention
was both reasonable and necessary if the boy was to have any hope of entering adulthood well adjusted.
Quinton stuck his hand out and prevented his escape. “Not so fast, young lad. I asked you a question and I do expect an answer.”
He shoved the boy back, gripping his shoulder.
“Ow! Let go!”
“Don’t be a baby,” Quinton said calmly. Then he added, “lad,” because the English word gave the whole sentence a proper ring.
And this was a very proper occasion. “Tell me why you thought you had the right to cry. If you give me the right answer, I
might let you off with a warning.”
The boy struggled against Quinton’s grip. “Let me go, you freak!” The boy’s mouth twisted. Did he have no sense at all? Did
he possess even the faintest awareness of whom he was dealing with?
Quinton squeezed hard and leaned forward so that he wouldn’t have to yell. He spoke in a stern whisper. “Someone’s going to
put a bullet in your head one of these days. I would, under different circumstances. You’re not the only snot in the world,
and the truth is, most people would rather kill you than listen to your whining little hole.”
The boy stared up at him in shock. A dark circle spread over his groin. Apparently, he hadn’t drained his bladder quite so
completely after all.
“Be very careful what you tell them. They won’t believe I hit you anyway, your face is already beet red from acting like a
baby. But if you do go out there and tell them I hit you, I might sneak into your room when you’re asleep and pull your tongue
out.”
But the boy did what most humans do in times of crisis. He became himself. He started to scream bloody murder.
Quinton’s hand moved with calculated strength, slamming open-palmed against the noisy brat’s jaw. Had he not been gripping
the boy’s shoulder, it would have been enough force to send Joshie across the room, but not enough to break his jaw or neck.
Crack!
“Bless you, boy, for you are a sinner.”
It was enough to shut the boy up. And shut him down. He shoved the boy’s limp body into the corner, wedged between the wall
and the urinal.
Satisfied that he’d gotten through, Quinton crossed to the mirror, adjusted his collar, tugged each cuff so that his shirt
showed just the right measure of white at the cuffs, smoothed his left eyebrow, which had somehow ruffled during the commotion,
and left the bathroom.
No one in the noisy restaurant gave him a second glance. The whole room might have stood and cheered to learn that Joshie
had fallen asleep at the urinal. If they all kept their fingers crossed long enough, the boy would one day fall asleep at
the wheel, crash through a bridge railing, and plummet into a river to meet an icy death.
Quinton felt doubly good with his accomplishment. Although he hadn’t been able to eat every bite of his steak, he had been
able to help both Joshie and the rest of the brats in this establishment without so much as raising an eyebrow from one of
them. Except Josh, of course. And he’d raised more than an eyebrow on the lad.
Quinton walked between the tables, gathering only the casual looks of appreciation offered to the best looking. So few realized
just how many psychotic members of society walked past them at the grocery store or through a restaurant each and every day.
What would frighten them even more was how many ordinary people were mentally sick and didn’t know it.
Quinton winked at the waitress on his way out, then thanked Anthony for the wonderful meal. The hostess greeted him kindly
at the front door.
“Was everything to your satisfaction?”
“Yes. Yes, Cynthia, it was. Do you happen to have any sanitized toothpicks?”
She glanced at the clear dispenser full of toothpicks, then reached under the counter and pulled out a box in which each toothpick
was individually wrapped. She smiled knowingly.
“Thank you.” He counted out seven, then nodded. “For my friends.”
“No problem. Take the whole box if you want.”
“No, I couldn’t do that. I doubt John would appreciate being robbed.”
She laughed. “Oh I doubt that, Mr. Elway is very generous.”
“Well, judging by his choice of steaks, he doesn’t skimp, I can agree to that. Have a great evening, Cynthia.”
“Thank you. Drive safe.”
He stopped at the outer door and looked back. “Oh, I almost forgot, I think a boy fell asleep in the restroom.”
“Really?”
“I don’t know, but he looked asleep to me.” He flipped his hand in a casual salute. “Anyway, thanks again.”
Then he was alone outside, surrounded by the night. He took a deep breath, appreciative of the rich scent of searing steak
from the establishment’s kitchen vents.
A man’s choice of car was telling. He once heard that an extremely wealthy man, whose name he’d purposefully forgotten, chose
to drive an old pickup truck rather than a Mercedes. Quinton had known at once that the man was either hopelessly insecure,
or completely mad. No one comfortable in their own skin would try to hide their wealth unless they supposed that others didn’t
approve of wealthy people or of people who wanted to be wealthy, thereby necessitating a disguise.