The Brides of Chance Collection (33 page)

“You got it, Parson.”

Alisa closed her eyes and listened to the gentle strumming of Titus’s guitar. One thing she loved about Titus was that he always seemed to be whistling, humming, or singing.

Through many dangers, toils, and snares
,

I have already come;

’Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far
,

And grace will lead me home
.

His rich baritone rose above the rest of the men’s voices. Alisa’s heart lurched as he sang. She’d come through danger, toils, and snares. Tears burned her eyes beneath closed lids. The thought of home seemed so unlikely. She had never had a real home. Mrs. Perryman had done her best, but everyone knew that by the time they were eighteen years old, they had to leave and make their own way in the world.

They were blessed. All of the children at Mrs. Perryman’s home. Most children in their circumstances were on their own much younger, but Mrs. Perryman felt a child needed to be taken care of years longer. Many did leave by the time they were fifteen or sixteen, but most stayed as long as they were allowed. Alisa had stayed a bit longer because she helped so much with the little ones. God’s mercy had stepped in just in time, and Mrs. Worthington had offered her the job as companion.

If only her grandmother had lived, Alisa would have a home. Living at the ranch the last couple of months had made her feel like part of a family for the first time ever. Against her better judgment, she allowed herself a moment to dream. She dreamed of Titus. Of staying here at Chance Ranch. Marrying Titus. Giving him a half-dozen babies. Really being part of a large, wonderful family.

“Let’s begin with a word of prayer.”

Alisa’s eyes flew open as she realized the music had ceased and the parson was now standing at the front of the barn. Her gaze shifted to Titus. Rather than having his head bowed with the rest of the group, he returned her stare. Her face flushed hot. The concern in his eyes made her feel as though he had read her thoughts.

But how could he know that she longed to call the ranch her home? Longed to return his attention? She had done all she could to keep her distance, though she had to admit to herself that it was becoming more difficult. Deep inside, she knew it would probably be best for her to leave, but how could she go now when Miriam needed her? Poor Miriam was sick morning and night. Halfway through the service, she left the barn, looking peaked.

The parson preached a beautifully poignant message about walking in the will of God. Alisa accepted it as God’s speaking directly to her, commissioning her to stay at the ranch to help Miriam until she could manage on her own. Tears ran freely down Alisa’s cheeks as Logan and Bryce, too, seemed to be listening to the call of God. Both boys slipped from their seats and knelt before a makeshift altar while the parson prayed for them.

By the time service was dismissed, the pig slow-roasting over the barbeque pit was beckoning with its smoky aroma. Alisa headed for the main cabin to check on Miriam and set out the pies.

Gideon had beat her to it and sat next to his wife on the bed.

“How is she?” Alisa asked.

Miriam moaned. “The barbeque smell is making me so ill I can scarcely stand to breathe.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry. Can I bring you anything to help?”

She shook her head as though the effort to speak was suddenly too great.

Gideon seemed to forget Alisa’s presence as Miriam rolled to her side, curled into a ball. He rubbed her back, crooning words of love and reassurance.

Feeling like an intruder, Alisa turned away and nearly collided with Titus. She gasped, stopping short. He reached out to steady her, the warmth of his hands steaming through her sleeves. She could feel the heat from his body, smell the smoke from the barbeque pit on his clothes.

With him standing this close, Alisa had trouble concentrating. Apparently he had the same trouble, for he stared mutely down, his face a profusion of emotion. Everything within Alisa screamed for her to pull away, to run outside to the safety found in the numbers of people cloistered in the barn and beginning to make their way into the yard. As she began a retreat, Titus drew her close until she was forced to stand on her tiptoes. “Stop running from me,” he said, his voice close to a growl. “You’re driving me crazy.”

“Titus,” she whispered. “I don’t mean to run….” She couldn’t finish. Instead, she stared into his blue eyes, becoming lost in the sea of emotion as they silently locked gazes. Only when her lungs began to burn did she realize she’d been holding her breath. Her lips parted slightly to allow an intake of air. Titus’s gaze flickered to her mouth, and Alisa knew in a heartbeat what was about to happen. Her stomach trembled as his head dipped closer.

“Well! Nothing is going on, is it?”

Titus released her in an instant and spun around at the sound of Priscilla’s indignant voice.

“No wonder you changed your mind about me. Why marry a decent girl when you can have an indecent one at your disposal?”

Alisa gasped, and the world began to spin as she noticed several neighbors, including Reba White, Prissy’s mother, standing nearby, listening to the girl’s lies.

This was the last straw. From far away, Alisa heard Titus call her name just before her world went black.

Chapter 12

A
cool cloth swept across Alisa’s wrists and neck. She shifted, trying to move away from the wetness, but it followed her. She moaned.

“That’s it, girl, open your eyes.”

Frowning, she obeyed. Mrs. White’s face hovered above her.

“What happened?”

“You fainted dead away. Titus brought you home, but considering Prissy’s big mouth, I thought it best if he not be in here alone with you.”

Clarity came rushing back, bringing with it the humiliation she’d felt at Prissy’s outburst. “Oh my.”

“Now don’t you worry. I know these Chances. They’re decent folks.” She went on without waiting for Alisa to comment. “Everyone around here knows Titus is a Godfearing man, and he’d marry you before he got close enough to compromise you. So don’t you go thinking anyone believes there’s anything improper going on out here.”

“Th–thank you, Mrs. White.” Alisa studied her hands, embarrassed by the entire topic.

“By the way, when will you and Titus be tying the knot?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Getting hitched? My Prissy says Titus won’t marry her because he’s in love with you.”

A flame of joy flared inside Alisa at the honor of a man like Titus Chance being in love with her, but the truth of the matter came behind like a cold, soaking rain and quickly quenched the flicker of happiness. “Oh, that’s not true. I don’t know why he isn’t marrying Prissy—except she did refuse him first.”

A pained look crossed Mrs. White’s face. “I know. That girl can’t seem to make up her mind. I told her she was being mighty foolish for turning down a Chance man. But she wouldn’t listen. Now she decides she wants him after all, and it’s too late.” She peered closer. “When did you say you two are getting married?”

“We’re not.” Alisa averted her gaze to the quilt.

Mrs. White’s work-roughened hand covered hers. “Unless I miss my guess, that decision is yours, not Titus’s.” The bed shifted with her weight as she turned slightly. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Alisa bit her trembling lips but shook her head. “I can’t.”

Somehow Alisa found herself enveloped in comforting arms, crying out her hurt and disappointment. When her tears were finally spent, Alisa took the handkerchief Mrs. White pressed into her hand. She wiped the wet, salty trails from her cheeks and blew her nose. “Thank you, ma’am.”

The older woman took hold of Alisa’s shoulders. The look she gave her could only be described as motherly, and Alisa bit her trembling lip to keep from sobbing all over again. “Now listen, honey,” Mrs. White said. “I know things can look pretty desperate out here. It’s a man’s world. That’s for sure. But if you’re thinking of leaving because of the difficulties, I urge you to reconsider. Take Miriam for instance. She came out here and took over her sister’s children, took on six brothers and their messiness and big appetites. Even in the family way and feeling sickly, she glows like a candle. Happiness is finding where you belong.”

“What if you don’t belong anywhere?” The question left her before Alisa could rein it in.

Understanding flickered across Mrs. White’s features. Her chin jutted upward in a short nod. “I see. You’ve been dealt a bad hand, and you’re running from something.”

With no strength to deny it, Alisa merely sighed. “I can’t stay here indefinitely and build a life with Titus when my past may bear down upon us one day.”

“Maybe you should come clean with him. Give him the choice to decide if it’s worth the risk or not.”

Alisa shook her head. “He can’t know anything about how I ended up here.”

“Honey, I can see the weight of the world is nearly more than your skinny shoulders can bear. If you don’t tell someone soon, you’re going to crack beneath the load. Now anything you tell me is going to stay right here in this room and in the throne room of God.”

How good it would feel to tell someone her troubles. Alisa’s heart began to pound against her chest. “You promise you won’t say a word? Because if the Chance family knew, it could cause them harm if I was ever found.”

A deep frown created twin ruts between Mrs. White’s eyes. “You have my word.”

Even before she began to speak, Alisa felt the burden lifting. Just knowing she could trust her plight to another human being made her feel a thousand times better. When Alisa finished up with Titus bringing her to the ranch, Mrs. White gave her a tender smile.

“So you see, Titus would move heaven and earth, even at the risk of crossing all five of his brothers, to help someone in obvious need. I think you should open up to him. Tell him the truth. If his feelings for you run as deep as yours do for him, I think he has a right to know.”

“My…feelings?”

“Every time you say his name, your face softens. You care for him. And I can’t say that I blame you. Now I believe every word of your story, and Titus will, as well. He’s saved you once, and unless I miss my guess—and I rarely do—he’ll do whatever it takes to prove your innocence.”

“But it doesn’t seem fair that he should be placed in that position. Wouldn’t it be better if I left and gave him the chance to turn to another woman? Prissy, for instance, cares for him a great deal.” The very thought of Titus ending up with that girl left a bitter taste in Alisa’s mouth. But perhaps if he were to fall back in love with the other girl, Alisa’s leaving, once Miriam was back on her feet, wouldn’t be so hard for him to swallow.

Mrs. White expelled a short laugh. “Once a man like Titus Chance finds real love, he won’t settle for anything less.” She stood. “Honey, I understand why you don’t want to open up to Titus, and I admire your reasons, but if you leave, I have a feeling he’ll come after you. Men like him don’t come along very often, and when they do, they don’t give up very easily.”

The thought of Titus coming after her sent a tremor through Alisa’s stomach. The memory of being held in his arms just before Prissy burst in on them made her heart slam against her chest.

He’d almost kissed her. There had been no question that she would have allowed it to happen. Not only allowed it, but most likely kissed him back. Weakness spread over her. If she was going to stay at the ranch for a few more months, she could never, ever let that almost happen again. No matter how she might long to feel his arms around her. Feel his kisses.

“I’ll leave you to gather yourself together.” Mrs. White stood.

“Oh, but I should get up and put the food out on the tables.”

Mrs. White patted Alisa’s shoulder. “I’ll take care of that. You can come out and help when you’re ready.”

Alisa lay back on the bed and stared at the ceiling.

Through many dangers, toils, and snares
,

I have already come;

’Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far
,

And grace will lead me home
.

Tears trickled down the side of her head and dampened her pillow.