The Bridesmaid's Checklist: Laura's Wedding (BCL Book 1) (9 page)

A
fter some time on my own, I did feel better, though I still wasn’t ready to return to the party. I decided to stay in my hiding place for a little bit longer.

Sitting there, I unintentionally overheard a private conversation. I really didn’t mean to listen, but I had to admit that it was my right to do so, since, in a way, it was mainly about me.

A few people came and went from the bar, and one couple lingered there a little longer than the others. It took me a moment to figure out those voices, but a minute into their conversation I was completely sure it was Edward and Josh.

“Everything seems quite all right for this pompous-ass engagement party of yours,” Josh said in an amused tone. “Are you enjoying the spotlight?”

Edward, as usual, sounded bored even as he snorted before responding. “I don’t give a shit about the party or the attention. The point is, it makes Laura freaking happy. So be it.”

I didn’t like his response much, but at least he was willing to please my friend.

Josh didn’t seem happy with the groom’s response, either, saying, “Well, you should be less of an asshole about it. Everything around you was planned to please that spoiled fiancé of yours,
and
you, of course. Show some real gratitude.”

“I’m paying for all this crap.” As always came that conceited, juvenile thought that money bought everything. It was silly, really, especially since he’d shown a bit of resistance to spending too much on the wedding. “There’s no reason for me to be fucking thankful,” he added. “I pay for a service and I receive it. Simple as that.”

“You dick,” Josh said. I hadn’t expected that. “You aren’t paying the person organizing it all, so stop being an asshole and show some real fucking appreciation.”

Where was he going with all of that?

If he’d actually spent a long time being Edward’s friend, he must have known that the guy didn’t do humble—or apologies.

“Sorry, Josh. Am I hurting your fragile feelings?” That sarcasm was all too familiar. “I never knew you were such a pussy.”

“I’m not talking about me, you idiot.” Josh’s kept his voice low and composed, but I could sense the anger behind his words. “I didn’t organize all this shit. Kass did. And you know it.”

Wow. Josh was actually defending me. I could hardly believe it. Did he actually care that much?

“Kassandra, Kassandra, Kassandra,” Edward whined, and for a moment my heart stopped; I thought he saw me. I looked around and reassured myself that I was still safely hidden in the cloistered stone pathway. “Everyone praises that silly girl like she’s a fucking genius party planner.”

That ass. He so knew I was good at this. He was just too proud to admit it.

“She isn’t a silly girl. She’s a wonderful, intelligent planner.” I thought maybe Josh would have stopped defending me by now, and it surprised me that he hadn’t. “Kass planned all this for you. Be. Fucking. Thankful.” This time, his tone sounded the exact opposite of friendly and calm.

“Whatever,” the groom said, brushing him off. “I’m tired of all the attention Kassandra’s getting for doing all this shit. I told Laura you were actually the one getting everything ready all the way up until the party started.”

Oh, no, he didn’t! He was the one who told on me?

“Wait a goddamn minute. Why would you tell Laura that?” my chivalrous defender asked. 

Edward sounded exasperated, as if the answer was self-explanatory. “You respected the damn budget I provided and went with me to get the alcohol. You were the one running all over the fucking place getting this location ready for the idiotic party, not her. I didn’t see her. She wasn’t here.”

Huh, he was still going on about the stupid budget. What about at three o’clock when I was out of the gym and running all around the place trying to sort out everything on my own?

I didn’t pay much attention to what Edward told Josh until I heard him say, “She was probably getting that big ass of hers into that tiny cheap dress.”

“Shut the fuck up about Kass,” Josh all but roared at the same time I jumped out of my hiding place. 

They didn’t notice me, but I could finally see what was going on. My ears grew hot. Edward looked smug as hell, as usual, and Josh looked furious.

“
She
planned this, fucktard,” he spat, shoving his face closer to Edward’s “She’s the one who spent her weekends organizing all this shit. She arrived hours before you showed your sorry ass, and she doesn’t deserve this crap from you.”

Edward simply breezed away from Josh, as if this happened all the time between them. He then stated, “Oh, so that’s what this shit is about. You want a piece of that ass?” He gave an obnoxious laugh. “Go ahead and fuck her out of your system. You’ll feel better. She isn’t even that great of a lay.”

“You sorry-ass motherfucker.” Josh grabbed him by his expensive grey suitcoat before I realized I was running toward them.

I couldn't stop myself—I had to break them apart. As angry as I felt, I was even more terrified of having a scene in the middle of this engagement party.

“Let him go, Josh,” I said.

“Kass…how—”

“Let. Him. Go,” I said as clearly and surely as I could muster with all the anger boiling inside me. Josh finally did as I said, and I felt him tense beside me; he wasn’t happy with my request.

“See?” Edward said with a sneer. “Even she knows she’s not worth it.”

I’d intended to stop them from fighting, but I just couldn’t help it. I slapped Edward as hard as I could. I never knew I actually had the courage I needed to finally do what I’d always wanted.

“You’re a bastard,” I told him with all the spite I could summon. “I can’t believe I ever had anything to do with you. You never deserved me, and you certainly don’t deserve Laura. Don’t ever talk to me again. I despise you.”

I was thankful that the bartender remained the only witness to our little argument. I was also thankful that I had someone defending me, giving me the courage to defend myself for once.

I turned to my white knight, grabbed his face, and kissed Josh like I may have always wanted. It made my lips hurt a little, but I didn’t care. Then I turned and headed for my purse and jacket. This party wasn’t for me anymore.

“I’m sorry about that. Ed’s a dick,” Josh called from behind me.

Why was
he
apologizing? “Yes, he is.” I couldn’t agree more, and there was no way I’d say the opposite.

“Apparently,
he
was the fucker who told Laura I was the hero of the day and not you.”

I found it cute that Josh seemed to be making excuses for his behavior, oddly enough, especially since I was the one who’d really acted out of turn.

“So I heard,” I admitted. What else could I say? I grabbed my jacket from the coatroom, made sure I had my purse with me, and headed toward The Garden’s front door.

“You heard?” Josh seemed disconcerted.

I stopped walking and turned to face him. “Yes, I did.” No point in denying it. “I was right there when you guys started talking.” I pointed to the stone stairs. “I heard all of your conversation.”

He kept looking at me as if I was about to break, or maybe he thought I was already broken. It took a few seconds for him to say, “I see. And how do you feel?”

Fucking amazing, I wanted to say. But I thought it might be too crude and wouldn’t help me feel much better around Josh. Instead, I decided to go with an understatement, “Not good.”

“I’m sorry,” he said. “He shouldn’t have said the shit he did.”

I wondered if Josh even realized that he didn’t have to keep apologizing.

He didn’t have to defend me.

He didn’t have to follow and check on me.

He didn’t have to ask how I felt.

“Why are you here, Josh?” I couldn't hold back my curiosity any longer.

“What do you mean?”

He seemed completely caught off guard by my direct question, and I had to remind myself that he couldn’t see inside my head, after all. I really didn’t know what I wanted to hear, but Edward’s words kept coming back to me. Maybe Josh only wanted to sleep with me, nothing else—although it seemed like a lot of trouble for only a night of pleasure.

“Do you really only care about getting into my pants?” I asked, bordering somewhere between a pleading glance and a glare.

Josh seemed to relax a bit before he answered me. “You
know
I do. But not in the way that moron phrased it. I don’t want you thinking about it like that.”

“You have no idea what I’m thinking,” I quipped, trying to get the image of Edward’s face out of my head.

“I don’t,” Josh said quietly. “I wish I had a clue.” Then he stepped closer to me and tilted his head. “And obviously you don’t know how I feel about you, either.”

“Then explain it to me.” I didn’t try to back away from him this time.

This time he looked at me with different eyes. I didn’t see myself broken in them anymore. “I’m insanely attracted to you,” Josh said. “So fucking attracted to you. Everything about you completely melts me. And I want more.”  He gazed intently at me. “Those gorgeous blue eyes of yours,The caramel color of your soft, perfect skin.” He raised the back of his right hand to trail it down my cheek. Then he tenderly brushed my lips with the pad of his thumb. “These lips. God, I want these lips all the time. The words that come out of them, so intelligent…so completely you…always finding a way to say the truth without hurting people’s feelings.”

Josh sounded so sincere that I wanted nothing more but for his words to be true and for my attraction to him be reciprocated. 

“And you’ve got the most perfect body I’ve ever seen,” he added, slipping a hand around my waist and pulling me toward him. Josh tucked a lock of hair behind my ear, then cupped my cheek and bent down to place his lips to my neck. I sighed and could hardly move while he covered my neck and collarbone with slow, hot kisses. His other hand slid down my waist to grab my ass, and his kisses turned from playful to charged with intensity. 

He pulled back, stared in my eyes, and said, “You’re perfect. Fucking perfect.” Then he covered my mouth with his.

At that moment everything felt perfect—his hands all over my body, his gorgeous mouth moving from mine to every available inch of my skin again, the hardness of his body as it pressed against mine. We seemed to mold together.

It was too much.

My senses were in overload.

I needed to calm down before we had sex right here by the coatroom.

While I tried to get some oxygen into my brain, his wandering fingers made their way up my thigh to reach beneath my dress and delicately trace the black lace garter I wore. “This thing has been driving me crazy since I saw it,” he confessed. “I want to take it off with my teeth and—”

“Oh, God. Josh, stop.” I held his hands with mine and begged him again. “Please stop.” I tried to turn away, but he held me in place with his strong hands.

“What’s wrong, baby? Tell me what’s wrong.” For the first time, he sounded agitated. So was I. But his words and actions were tender; clearly he didn’t want me to leave.

To be honest I didn’t want to leave, either, but I had to remember the reason I stayed away from guys like him. I wanted to believe his words.

“Nothing’s wrong,” I said. “You’re saying all the right things, but it’s too much right now.”

Josh looked me in the eyes and asked, “You don’t want me?”

“I do want you, but….” How could I tell him that as much as I wanted
him
, I didn’t want to end up heartbroken? Not again. “I can’t do this right now.”

“Why the fuck not?” Josh leaned away from me and finally let go of my arms.

God, I didn’t want to be rude or hurt his feelings, but I couldn’t just lie to him. “I’ve seen you with girls. Lots of girls,” I said. “I don’t want to be played around with.”

“That’s what this is about?” he asked with a frown. “You think I’ll play with you?” His voice lowered when he said, “I want you and only you.”

“You’ve been seeing Mindy, too,” I replied, finally letting it out. “I know, so don’t try to deny it. She’s your date tonight.”

“Mindy? You’re jealous because of Mindy?” Josh was almost laughing, and his concern seemed to lift all of a sudden.

“I’m not jealous.”

“Mindy’s my P.A.” he explained. “She works for me. So, yeah, I’ve been seeing her, too. But not in the way I want to see you. Not at all.” He took a deep breath and calmly continued his explanations. “We had a meeting today. When I got your message, I left as soon as possible and left Mindy to take notes for me. After the meeting, she brought my clothes. I was supposed to change at the office, but I forgot my suit and she brought it for me. I thought it’d be rude to send her back after doing me those favors, so I asked her to stay and enjoy the party.” He looked like he found it particularly difficult not to burst out laughing. “I believe I saw her flirting with the bartender.”

I stood there and frowned at him, folding my arms and trying to find something to say. My assumption may have been a little embarrassing, but I’d seen him with so many other young, beautiful  women in so many other bars, I still wasn’t completely convinced.