The Broken Man (24 page)

‘I will be careful. I would never do anything to lose my mother’s locket.’

‘Nevertheless, if you find yourself growing anxious about keeping the locket safe, you must come and see me. Is that understood, Adam?’

‘Yes, miss.’

‘Now then, you heard what Mrs Baker said. Half an hour. That should give you time enough to prepare yourself. Off you go then.’

When he hesitated, she asked him gently, ‘What is it, Adam? Is there something worrying you?’

‘No, miss.’

‘Then why haven’t you gone already?’

‘I just wanted to know, if the dog might be with them?’

‘Oh! I see.’ Her merry smile was infectious. ‘Not this time, I’m afraid. And nor will the children be with them. The first meeting is just you and the parents. Don’t get too worried, Adam. If this family proves not to be right for you, then we shall have to look again. You do understand what I’m saying, don’t you, Adam?’

‘Yes, miss.’

‘Good. Now, run along and be quick. You’ll be sent for the minute they arrive.’

‘Yes, miss.’

She watched him go out the door.
Dear me,
she thought,
if it isn’t one thing, it’s another
.

A moment later she was hurrying along the corridor to the library.

As always she muttered to herself. ‘Half an hour and they’ll be here. All I can say is that it’s just as well they did lose their babysitter, considering the amount of time I spent with Adam … enjoyable, though. Yes indeed. Quite enjoyable.’

The silver locket reminded her of her own lost youth.
These days I feel so old and lonely
, she thought.

She tutted all the way down the corridor, ‘I never did find the right man.’

But Adam was never far from her thoughts. ‘They say light will always follow the darkness.’ She recalled her own father having uttered those words many years ago. ‘… I hope for the boy’s sake, that might be true.’

CHAPTER ELEVEN

L
IZ DEXTER SAT
at the dressing table, her auburn hair swept up in a ponytail, and her slim figure looking fresh and smart in a long-sleeved blue dress.

Her husband, Jim, stood at the far end of the bedroom, gazing across at this woman he loved. ‘You look beautiful, sweetheart.’

‘Thank you.’ She smiled at him through the mirror. ‘Flatterer.’ Her face lit up at his warm compliment.

She took a moment to sweep her eyes over him. Of medium height, with the slightest paunch, he had a shock of fair hair, twinkly blue eyes and the features of a handsome puppy dog. ‘Change your shirt, Jim.’

‘What for?’ He examined himself in the long wardrobe mirror. ‘A white shirt always goes down well with authority.’

‘Maybe. But we’re hoping the boy takes to us, and, like you say, a white shirt does smack of authority. Change it –’ she gave him a mischievous smile ‘– or I might be forced to rip it off your back.’

At that, he rushed across the room, and slid his arms round her waist. ‘Ooh! That sounds promising. But I’m afraid it will have to wait because we’ve got only about twenty minutes to get there.’

She groaned. ‘Oh, bugger!’ Swinging off the stool, she went to the bed and collected her cardigan and handbag. ‘I’d better go and make sure Maureen has everything she needs.’

As she ran out the door, she called back, ‘Change the shirt, Jim! Wear the blue one.’

As always, Jim did as he was told. ‘I’m a poor, henpecked husband!’ he yelled down the stairs, but got no response as Liz went skidding into the sitting room.

Softly whistling, he returned to check himself in the mirror. Finally satisfied that he looked smart and approachable in his dark trousers and blue shirt, he patted his hair down.
That’s it! Ready for anything
, he thought.

After a week of nail-biting and worrying, the big day had finally arrived, but it had not been without its problems.

Liz had not slept well, having got herself in a tizzy about whether they were doing the right thing. He hoped he had reassured her.

Downstairs, Liz was talking to Maureen, a sixteen-year-old with a bird’s-nest of black hair swept up, and a mouth carefully shaped with the brightest of lipsticks. She was the only daughter of their closest neighbour, and she had babysat many times before. ‘I’m off to the flicks tonight,’ she told Liz. ‘Got a new boyfriend.’ She made a swooning noise. ‘He’s not as good-looking as Danny, but he’s all right for now. Anyway, Danny will see me out with my new fella, and he’ll get jealous; that’ll teach him for giving me the old heave-ho.’

‘Well, let’s hope the same doesn’t happen with this new boy.’ Today of all days, Liz did not particularly want to hear about Maureen’s turbulent love-life.

‘Ah, but it won’t happen,’ Maureen chirped. ‘Hopefully, it’ll be me giving him the shove. Y’see, I’m not all that fond of him. I’m only going out with him to get Danny all riled up.’

‘Ah! You think that might make him come running back, do you?’

‘Oh, yeah!’ She giggled. ‘He’s just sulking. Truth is, he fancies me rotten! Oh, and he’s just got a full-time job at the garage. They pay really good money. So, when we go out, I won’t have to pay for a thing.’

Liz had to smile. ‘Honestly, Maureen. You’re incorrigible.’

‘What does that mean?’

‘Never mind. I’ll tell you later. For now, I’m counting on you to take good care of the children. As you can see, Harriet’s in her cot. She’s been fed for now. I’ve left the feed times on a list, with the other things you might need. You’ll find them all in the basket in the kitchen, with a spare dummy, a pile of nappies and such.’

‘OK. Thanks.’

‘If there’s the slightest problem, go and ask your mum. Now, have I forgotten anything? Do you have any questions?’

‘Nope! I’ve done this job before, and anyway, you told me everything I need to know last night. Don’t worry, I’ve watched the children before and I’m good with them, you know that, Mrs Dexter. I’ll feed Buster if you’re late back, too, and let him out if he whines to go.’

‘Yes, I do know, but this time you’ve got Alice to look after as well, which is why I’m insisting that you will fetch your mum if need be.’

‘I promise.’

‘Good. Oh, and do keep an eye on Alice. Let her sleep, though. She needs it after her bad night. I kept her at home today because she’s got the sniffles. She was fast asleep just now when I went in. I had a word with her earlier, so I won’t disturb her now. I’ve explained everything to her, so she won’t be any trouble.’

‘Naw, she never is. Alice and me, we get on just fine. If she comes down and wants to play a game, I’ve brought some with me – snakes and ladders and all that.’

‘That’s good thinking, Maureen. There are more games in her room if you need them.’

Jim was getting anxious. ‘Come on, Liz.’ He burst into the room. ‘I’ve just checked on Alice, and she’s still fast asleep. Anyway, Maureen knows the ropes by now. We’d better leave now or we’ll be even later.’

He gave Buster an absent-minded pat on the head as he left and Buster retreated under the kitchen table.

As they climbed into the car, Liz still had a niggling doubt about their errand today. ‘Jim?’

‘Yes, love?’ Jim was taking extra care as he pulled out onto the road. ‘What’s up?’

‘I can’t help feeling just a bit guilty.’

‘Why’s that?’

‘Well, you know, there are so many people out there who can never have babies of their own. We’ve already got two beautiful children, and now we’re about to offer a home to this boy Adam. It does seem a bit greedy, when he might be perfect for any one of those childless people.’

Jim had suspected for some time that Liz was not altogether sure about the fostering. ‘Are you saying we should go back, ring Miss Martin and tell her we’ve changed our minds about having Adam?’

Liz was horrified. ‘No! I’m not sayng that. Not at all.’

‘Then what
are
you saying?’

Liz was silent for a moment, searching for the right words. ‘I’m just asking, do you think we’re being selfish fostering this boy? Won’t we be depriving another family, who can never have children of their own?’

Jim was not surprised by the question. He had anticipated something like this because of Liz’s quiet mood over the past few days.

He took a time before answering. ‘So instead of having Adam, you would rather we have another child of our own. Is that what you’re thinking?’

‘Something like that, yes. And don’t tell me you haven’t thought of it as well?’

‘Yes, I might have given it a passing thought, but that’s all. Because I don’t want us to take the risk of you being pregnant again. I know what could happen – what has a seventy per cent chance of happening – and I can’t take the risk. I thought you agreed.’

‘I thought I did as well. But maybe we should have discussed it further, before raising this poor boy’s hopes.’

‘No! Haven’t we already discussed it until we’re blue in the face, and it always comes out the same?’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

‘Well, tell me this: would you still want to get pregnant, with such a high chance that our two beautiful children could be left without a mother?’

‘It would break my heart to think of leaving them.’

‘Yes, and it would break mine too.’

Flicking the indicator, Jim drew the car to the kerb and parked. Then he took hold of Liz’s hand to tell her gently, ‘Listen to me, sweetheart. I know how hard it is, but I thought we had already faced the situation and come to a joint decision. I love our two girls, and I still have room in my heart for a third child. I honestly don’t mind whether it’s a boy or a girl, but I don’t want a third child if it means losing you.’

He leaned over and kissed her. ‘Do you think I don’t know just how difficult it is for you? You’re a wonderful wife … a natural mother. But you seem to have forgotten what the doctor said. He sat us both down and he told us that after the dangerous and traumatic time you had through both births, a third one might well be too much of a risk.’

‘I know that. But a doctor can be wrong. It has been known.’

‘No, Liz! For heaven’s sake, listen to yourself! We almost lost both you and Harriet. Your heart actually stopped! You were in hospital for weeks. Even after you were eventually allowed home, it took you as long again to recover. Have you forgotten all of that?’

Liz had not forgotten the awful nightmare, not for a single minute. ‘I just thought that maybe, with a third child, they would monitor me more. That’s all,’ she said quietly.

‘Oh, I see.’ Jim made a desperate effort to remain calm, although he was deeply angry at what she was saying. ‘So, let me get this straight. You would like us to try for another child. And, regardless of what the doctor said, you think you know better. You think that if they monitor you throughout the pregnancy – if they keep you in for possibly a third or half of the pregnancy – everything will be just fine.’

‘But it might be.’

‘And the chances are it might not. And what about your two daughters? What if you were kept in hospital in order to “monitor” you? Would you really want them to be without their mother … possibly for months? I would take your place with the girls … possibly even lose my job. And every minute of every day I would wonder if you were ever coming home to us again.’

Tearful, knowing that he was right, Liz felt ashamed. ‘I’m sorry. It’s just that—’

‘I know it’s difficult, sweetheart. But, let’s look at this another way. There’s a young boy out there who’s been through a nightmare. They say he’s lost everything: his home, and his family. He has nothing and no one. They’ve told us what happened to him, and now they’re trying to find him a family, some people who might build his belief in humanity again. Some people who might show him that the world is not the ugly, cruel place he has seen so far.’ He grew emotional. ‘Oh, Liz! We could give this boy so much. And who knows, maybe he’ll do the same for us. But we won’t do this unless you’re happy about it. As for me, I’m ready to show him kindness and love as a substitute father. But before we go on, you have to be sure.’

‘You’re such a good man.’ Liz slid over in her seat and kissed him soundly on the face. ‘Jim Dexter, you are the kindest, most sensible man I’ve ever known. And I love you.’

Jim kissed her back. ‘Are you nervous?’

‘A bit. But I feel more content about the whole thing now.’

‘Good. Now hang on. We’re late already!’

Reassured, he pulled back out onto the road and roared away.