The Burning Claw: Book 10, The Grey Wolves Series (22 page)

“Costin?”

Chapter 11

“I thought I could endure. I thought I could hold on until she was safely back in my arms. I thought a lot of crap that just wasn’t true. Now here I am, falling apart, dying inside.” ~Costin

C
ostin held the phone in his shaking hand. Fur sprouted on his flesh as he fought to keep his wolf in check.

“Costin?” Decebel’s voice rumbled on the other end.

“I know it’s early,” he began.

“Don’t worry about that. Are you alright?”

Costin was shaking his head and then realized his Alpha would need words. “No.” He didn’t mean to growl but his wolf was the one that responded. The wolf was done. He was done waiting for someone else to find her. He was done allowing the man to be in control.

“I need someone to care for my pup,” he told him.

“Is Titus alright?” The concern in Decebel’s voice would normally have endeared Costin, but in that moment, everything was simply getting on his nerves.

“He’s fine. He’s still asleep. I’m holding on by a thread, Dec. I’m not safe. Please have one of the females take care of him until I’m able.”

The silence on the other end was torturous. Costin needed to know that Titus would be taken care of.

“Done. What about you? What do I need to do about you?”

Costin bit back the growl. “I’m dealing. I told you if it got completely uncontrollable that I’d let you know. I just need some time to think—and some space.”

Costin bit his lip as he awaited his Alpha’s decision.

“Fine. I’ll give you some breathing room. But you need to come to the Romania pack mansion this evening. That’s an order,” Decebel growled using a little bit of his Alpha power.

Costin held his wolf back from growling at the order and then answered. “I will be there.”

As he ended the call, he heard the pitter patter of little feet and turned to find Titus walking into the living area, rubbing his eyes and yawning.

“I could go with you,” Titus said, making it clear that he’d heard at least some of the conversation.

Costin knelt down on one knee and held his arms open to the little boy who’d stolen his heart. “Not this time, Titus. I love you. I will be back and I will have your mommy with me.”

Titus squeezed him tightly and Costin didn’t want to let go but knew he had to. He was one kill away from becoming feral and he wouldn’t put his son in danger. He’d never hurt his cub, but that doesn’t mean the boy wouldn’t be collateral damage.

Two hours later, there was a knock at the door. Costin opened it to find Zara, the young teen who’d they’d rescued with Titus. She looked a little better than when he’d last seen her; she no longer wore the vacant expression she’d borne when they’d taken her out of that coven.

“Your Alpha asked Vasile if I would be willing to come hang with Titus,” Zara explained.

“Hi!” Titus grinned from just behind Costin. The little boy scurried around his dad and wrapped his arms around the girl as if he’d always known her. She leaned down and patted his back awkwardly as she glanced up at Costin..

“How would you like to make a new friend and hang out for a bit?” she asked him, pulling back to look at him.

Titus nodded. “The angel said you would come. She said a lost girl with sad eyes would be found and that she would need a friend.”

Zara smiled. “Well, your angel was correct. I do need a friend. Do you think you’re up to the task?”

“I can sure give it a try.” Titus looked over his shoulder at Costin.

He nodded and Titus turned back to Zara. “Let me get dressed and then I’ll be back. Don’t leave,” he called over his shoulder as he ran from the room in search of clothes.

Costin stared at the teen; she didn’t fidget. Impressive. He wondered why, if she was really up to watching a child when she hadn’t been able to leave her room for the past few days.

“You look skeptical,” she said as if she could read his mind. “Alina came and talked to me. And to hopefully put your mind at ease, let me just tell you that I’m not like, crazy or anything. I would never hurt a child or let anything happen to him.”

“Did Alina tell you why she was asking you to do this?” Costin asked.

Zara brushed the hair back from her face and slid her hands into the front pocket of her jeans. “She said that sometimes, after a crisis, or life altering event, the best way to heal is to be needed and to help others. Taking the focus off of myself and not allowing myself to wallow in something I can’t change. She said it was okay to mourn what I’d lost. It was okay to hurt and be angry. But she doesn’t want me to stay in those places. She wants me to move forward. The best way to move forward is to stop looking back.”

“Alina is one of a kind,” Costin told her and he wished he could smile to make the words more caring and less robotic. But there just wasn’t enough of him left to smile.

Costin wasn’t sure that this girl, who was dealing with God knows what, was the best person to care for his son. But Costin trusted Alina. He didn’t trust his wolf right now and when he felt a growl rolling up in his throat, he quickly turned away from the girl.

“He eats pretty much anything; don’t give him a lot of sugar. Bedtime is at 7:30 p.m. Don’t let him talk you into staying up later. Make sure he brushes his teeth.” Costin paused to think if there was anything else but his mind was a mess of anger, frustration, pain, and sorrow.

“Do what you need to do,” Zara told him. “I promise I’ll take good care of him.”

Costin waited for Titus to return and then picked the little boy up. He hugged him close, telling himself that he was doing the right thing, though it felt as though the rest of his heart was being torn from his chest. Sally had taken most of it, but Titus also held a piece of it.

Titus pulled back and put his small hands on either side of his face. “Don’t worry, Daddy. Mommy isn’t gone. She’s just a little lost.”

“I love—” Costin stopped as he choked back tears and then tried again. “I love you, Titus. So, so, much.”

“I love you, Daddy. I’ll be here when you get back.” Titus smiled at him and Costin felt that smile all the way to the dark places in his soul.

Costin pressed a kiss to his forehead and then set him down. Zara took Titus’ hand and began to lead him from the room while saying something about breakfast. Costin wasn’t exactly sure what she’d said because the constant growling in his mind was getting louder. His need to get out of the room, away from the four walls that were closing in on him, was like an itch that couldn’t be quelled no matter how much scratched it.

He glanced at the door and then over to the window. It would be a long jump, but it would also be faster. That was the only reason his wolf needed. Costin phased, letting his clothes tear away from his body and, once in his large wolf form, he ran head first at the window.

His head hit the glass and it didn’t even slow him down. He could have opened the window but then he wouldn’t have gotten to crash through it. Violence, blood, and death. Over and over his wolf snarled in his mind.  There was no escaping it, no sating it, except with her. He needed his mate.

His paws hit the ground with surprising ease considering the height from which he had jumped. There was no pause in his movement. His body was fluid and powerful, like a raging river as he flew into the forest. Costin didn’t know if he would be able to pull himself back to take control of his wolf if he let the beast out to hunt. The darkness inside of him had grown, despite the fact that there was a still a bond, albeit an empty one, somewhere in his mind. The thought spurred him on and his legs moved faster. About two miles into the run he caught the scent of a large animal. He stopped and stuck his nose in the air, sniffing. When he had a lock on his target, he took off like a bullet.

Finally, he could let go and give into the needs of his wolf. His mouth watered with the coming meal and his heart beat faster, assisting his muscles in getting the oxygen they needed. When he was within a few feet of his prey, he realized his mistake. It hadn’t been just a large animal, but a large group of animals. A heard of wild boar grazed in the trees near a small creek. It had been awhile since he’d fought such a formidable foe and never without the help of his pack. But that was then. That was before he’d lost his mate and his soul.

His muzzle pulled back in a silent snarl. He took one step, then another, and another. His heart was pounding fast as adrenaline flooded his body. But it wasn’t just adrenaline that was flowing through his veins when he finally lunged, teeth bared, and claws extended. There was darkness infiltrating his very cells, and as his teeth sunk into the shoulder of the first boar, he could hear the darkness whispering in his mind, urging him to kill, to maim, and to bathe in the blood of his prey. Costin gave himself over to the darkness. He had been fighting it for so long and then Sally, his true mate, had come. But she’d been taken from him in the blink of an eye and, just like that, the darkness was back. Without her, he felt as though the sun had been forever eclipsed, along with its comforting warmth and light.

Chapter 12

“
There are times in my life that I look back, of course, and wonder. What did I miss? Could I have prevented this outcome? Surely, there were clues. What was it that blinded me so thoroughly?”  ~Prince Thalion

“
W
e’ve been waiting for days, Thalion,” Cyn said in her cool, detached tone. He hated when she used that tone with him. He wasn’t just another male to her; he was her future husband and she his bride. With him, there should be no barriers, no glass walls. She so frequently employed those blockades with the rest of the world. Shouldn’t he be different?

“He is the king” he began but she interrupted him.

“Forgive me, but he’s the king of what? For as long as I have known you, you have ruled over your people. I do not really understand why Ludcarab carries such power over you. You have a kingdom behind you. What does he have?” she challenged, still in that detached tone of voice.

Thalion’s stomach clenched and it felt as though a thousand rocks had been dropped into it. If his father truly was alive, he knew exactly what his father had behind him. He had thought his father had chosen an honorable death many years ago, unable to live with his treachery. The elvin king had been caught having an affair. Thalion’s mother had been heartbroken. She’d always been the model queen to their realm—noble, wise, diplomatic. She’d hung on her husband’s every word and pampered him ridiculously because she loved him and her realm. She adored him and thought he felt the same for her. She died shortly after Thalion’s father left in the middle of the night. He’d left a note saying he would give his own life in repentance for the disrespect he’d shown his wife, the queen, and his people. After all, if a king can’t even be faithful to his own wife, then how could they trust him to be faithful to the kingdom?

A few weeks before his father’s affair had been exposed, Thalion had overheard a conversation between his father and a vampire—a very old and very powerful vampire. The fact that he was even dealing with a vampire was horrific, but what in seven realms could he possibly be doing speaking with this vampire? Thalion had found out. His father had been recruited as a member of The Order of the Burning Claw.

Despite his best efforts, Thalion hadn’t been able to glean much information. Anyone he asked about the organization had no clue what he was talking about, or were too scared to reveal what they knew. But what little he could find out about the secret organization wasn’t good.

“I believed my father to be dead, Cyn. Finding out he isn’t, and finding out why, sort of trumps being bothered by a little waiting.”  They were in the wilderness in the Elvin realm, far away from the kingdom. But the fact that his father wanted to meet him in the realm was a surprise. If, at any time during his exile, Thalion’s father had entered the realm, Thalion would have known instantly. Whatever the man had to say was serious.

“Do you have any idea what he wants with you?” she asked him.

“Maybe,” Thalion answered her instead of giving her the truth. He knew that if he told her what he knew, she’d insist they leave and go straight to the high fae, which they would eventually do. But first he needed to see his father. Cyn wouldn’t understand the bond between children and their parents. The fae aren’t the most nurturing of species, and Cyn had been taken from her family to train as a fae warrior at a very young age.

They stood in a small glade. On the other side of the pond was the Veil to the human realm. Did it mean that his father had come from the human realm? Was that where the Order was headquartered? Or was it a ploy to make him believe that? On the tail end of that thought, there was movement in the trees just past the Veil and then his father, Ludcarab, appeared. He looked exactly as Thalion had remembered him. Tall, slim, with long hair that was more platinum than blonde. His eyes were the same piercing green, and the hard gaze with which he fixed his son brought to Thalion many memories—few of them pleasant.

“Son,” he began as he started walking toward them.

In an instant, Cyn was in front of Thalion—her daggers drawn, knees bent, and body leaned slightly forward— poised to strike.

His father laughed. “When did we start hiring fae guard dogs?”

Thalion saw Cyn’s back tense and knew she was seconds away from attacking. His female was tough, and powerful. She’d kick his father’s ancient ass, of that Thalion had no doubt.

“She isn’t my guard, she is my mate, my bride to be,” he said proudly as he stepped closer to her and put a hand on her waist as a reminder that he was there; he was safe.

“The kingdom has fallen onto hard times indeed. I never imagined that you’d have to seek a mate among another species.” The condescending tone set Thalion’s teeth on edge.

“Why are you alive?” he asked without acknowledging the older king’s words.

“I’m alive because our people need a real leader, one with a vision—a vision of our people in the rightful place, not cowering in fear from the humans.” The conviction in his voice was surprising. He truly believed what he was saying.

But that wasn’t why Thalion had asked the question. “You know what I meant. You promised that you were going to punish yourself for the affair by giving your life as an offering? Did you miraculously return from the dead? Because surely you wouldn’t disrespect my mother, your wife and queen, and our entire realm, twice in one lifetime.”

His father took several steps forward but stopped when Cyn moved forward as well. “There is a greater purpose at work than just you or your mother. I am sorry that I hurt her, but I couldn’t die, there was just too much that I needed to do.”

Thalion was getting sick of his propaganda. “Why did you summon me, Father?”

The king stood up taller and set his shoulders back, holding his chin higher. He appeared regal and powerful. “I’ve come to take back my throne and my kingdom.”

L
illy sat at the entrance to the cave that led to the warlocks’ kingdom. She couldn’t sleep. It had been that way since Jacque had come back from wherever it was her spirit had gone. She’d been giving Fane and Jacque space to spend time with their child, though she was dying to hold him again. Cypher had offered to help in any way he could, but Vasile said that, for now, there was really nothing he could do. So they were on standby if the wolves needed them at any time. Meanwhile, Cypher was continually training his warriors, helping them relearn how to use the magic that had been slowly slipping away from them.

Lilly could feel the magic inside of her growing as well and she didn’t understand it. Her ability to sense things had grown into the ability to prophesy, but the gift simply didn’t manifest itself any time that she wanted. The visions that came to her seemingly had their own will. She couldn’t stop them and she couldn’t change them. There were even some that she couldn’t share with anyone else. Those sucked. It also sucked when a premonition told her only that some specific thing had to happen or someone would be in grave danger. No mention of what that danger might be, of course. When Lilly had told Jacque that she must go on the vampire hunt, even though she was pregnant, she had no idea why. She only knew that if her daughter hadn’t gone, something terrible would have happened—even worse than the horrible experience that actually took place.

“How did I know I would find you here?” Cypher’s deep voice came from behind her. If he didn’t see her every couple of hours, then he would come and seek her out. She liked that he wanted to see her, to be near her.

“It’s one of the few places where I can think clearly,” she told him, though he already knew it.

“Anything new?” he asked.

Lilly shook her head.

“Would you like to talk about whatever it is that’s bothering you?”

She let out a sigh as her shoulders slumped. “I want to see Slate.”

“Then let’s go see him,” Cypher said, as if it were that easy.

“We can’t just invite ourselves. They aren’t children. Jacque is an adult. She’ll resent me if I act like I have a right to barge into her house to see my grandchild.”

He crossed his arms in front of his chest as he stared down at her. “Then what will it take for you to get to see Slate?”

Instead of answering, Lilly pulled the phone from her pocket. “I just need to call her. But she’s probably not even up yet, or she’s tired. I’ll wait a little longer.”

“Will you join me back in our room and try and get a little sleep, seeing as
you
are tired as well,” Cypher pointed out.

She smiled as she took his offered hand and let him pull her to her feet. “Sleep, Warlock King—only sleep,” Lilly chided.

“Wouldn’t dream of trying anything else.” He shot her a wink and a roguish smile.

“I’ll believe that when Decebel lets Jen do a striptease in public.”

J
acque smiled as she ended the call and set her cellphone back down on the end table. She was sitting on the couch in the living room area of their suite holding a sleeping Slate.

“Grandma is coming to see you,” she whispered to the sleeping child. Jacque hadn’t been surprised to see that her mom was calling. She had been surprised that she’d waited so long. But she also appreciated that her mom had given her and Fane time to get settled in with their son.

“How are my two favorite people?” Fane asked as he stepped from their bedroom, freshly showered and looking too tempting for his own good. Jacque wanted to kick herself for drooling over her mate as if she’d just met him.

“I hope you never stop drooling, Luna,” Fane teased her.

She frowned at him. “Stay out of my head, wolf-man.”

“When will your mom be here?” he asked her as he sat down beside her on the couch.

“Half an hour.”

Fane reached out his hands and Jacque grinned. She loved it when Fane held Slate. It was the most amazing sight. She leaned over and placed their son in his arms and then sat back to watch as her big, bad, wolf-man turned into a pile of mush.

Two hours later, Lilly was gazing down at Slate in awe. “He’s so beautiful.”

“You have to say that,” Jacque laughed. “You’re his grandma.”

Lilly shot her a look. “Please. People know when their child or grandchild is ugly, but they are able to look past it because they’re looking at the child through eyes cloaked in love. In this case, however, Slate really is a beautiful baby.”

Fane had gone outside for a bit of fresh air, allowing Jacque and her mom to spend some time together but she could feel him getting restless through their bond. His wolf didn’t like being away from their pup and mate.

“Is Fane getting antsy?” Lilly asked with a knowing glint in her eyes.

“How’d you know?” Jacque asked.

“Because you start to fidget when you guys are apart for longer than a few minutes. I know that you can feel his stress through your bond; I can see it all over your face.”

Lilly leaned down and pressed her lips to her grandson’s forehead. “Love you, little Slate,” she whispered and then gingerly handed him back to Jacque.

“You don’t have to go,” Jacque started but Lilly waved her off.

“Yes I do. I’ve got stuff to do and you and Fane are still on your baby honeymoon. Get rest when you can and don’t say no to any offer of help, okay?” She eyed her daughter waiting for her answer.