Alexander took full advantage of having her in his arms. Last time there was the danger of someone walking in on them; this time Anthony was keeping watch on the outside. No one would disturb them, and Alexander was going to take full advantage of being able to explore his Amelia. When he had finished exploring her hair, she was completely dishevelled, and he moved his hand underneath her cloak. Amelia had stilled at the movement, but Alexander deepened his kisses, and she relaxed into him once more.
Every time Amelia responded to him, Alexander was further convinced she was the only woman for him. He gave into the temptation to brush his hand across Amelia’s breast and smiled at the moan of pleasure he captured with a kiss. Reluctantly he pulled away from her kisses; as much as he wanted to continue they had only a limited time together.
Slipping his arms around Amelia’s tiny waist, Alexander rested his forehead on hers. “We need to talk,” he said quietly.
“I hope you don’t expect any coherence from me at the moment,” Amelia said with a sigh. “You can’t kiss me senseless and then expect an intelligent conversation, Captain Worthington. That’s just unfair!”
Alexander chuckled, kissing her nose. “First things first: my given name is Alexander; I want to hear it on your lips.”
Amelia smiled. “That at least I can do, Alexander.”
“I want to hear you say that every day for the rest of my life,” Alexander said with feeling.
“What are you saying?” Amelia asked. Her throat felt suddenly dry.
“I need to be honest with you. Will you listen to everything I have to say?” Alexander needed to be open with Amelia for him to get her co-operation, but some of the things he wanted to say would not necessarily be easy for her to hear.
“I will,” Amelia said quietly, watching Alexander closely.
This was it, the most important conversation of Alexander’s life, and he could not mess things up. “Amelia, you have such a beautiful name,” he whispered, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. He wanted to keep touching her, but he had to be honest with her. “We both know that if I hadn’t been injured at Trafalgar, our paths would never have crossed.”
Amelia nodded. What he said was true; there was no point ignoring the fact. “I know,” she said reasonably.
“I would have remained that stiff-lipped person I was and would have married some chit, and we would have remained in our superior little world,” Alexander said with derision.
Amelia stiffened slightly at his side. The thought of him with someone else was even harder to bear when she had shared kisses with him.
“I’m so glad Richard sat me next to you on that bench in November,” Alexander continued. “I look back with shame at what I was before then. I can’t even blame my upbringing; when you get to know Anthony more you will find he is nothing like I was.”
“He’s a good dancer,” Amelia said with a smile.
“I hate that everyone has danced with you except me! When I fully recover, if all goes to plan, I shall be flouting convention and dancing with you every dance, not the prescribed two or three,” Alexander ground out. “Anyway, I’ve been challenged recently that the reason I want to marry you is because you are the only one who would have me because of my lack of sight and, at first, I couldn’t argue against it.”
“Oh.” Amelia responded weakly in surprise and shock. “You want to marry me?”
“Of course, I want to marry you,” Alexander said roughly. “You are the most wonderful, kind, giving, beautiful person I know.”
“Oh,” Amelia responded, shocked into silence.
“I would have said eloquent, but at the moment I think I need to revisit that compliment,” Alexander said with a smile at the shocked expression on Amelia’s face.
Alexander’s words did the trick, and Amelia glowered at him good-naturedly. She pulled herself together, trying to focus on all of the conversation and not just the part where he said he wanted to marry her. “So your feelings for me have been challenged?” she asked.
“I couldn’t argue against it,” Alexander continued quickly. “In some way it was an unfair challenge. We accept that we wouldn’t have crossed paths, but that doesn’t mean that what I feel for you is any less valid. I never really considered marriage until meeting you and then not at the start. I enjoyed your company right from the first time you spoke to me, but I never considered that having you as my wife was having second best. I came down to Lyme because, although I’d made improvements in my life, thanks in the main to you, there was still something missing. Without being in your company every day my achievements no longer seemed important. I wanted to share everything with you; I wanted to be near you all the time.”
“So, you grew to like me?”
“I grew to love you; I always liked you,” Alexander admitted with a smile that lit up his face. “I came down to Lyme to see you because I was missing you so much. I still hadn’t seriously thought about marriage until I visited your home that first time. I realised we would never be as private as we had been on our visits to Green Park, and that’s what I wanted more than anything; I wanted to be with you every moment of every day but without others being there all the time. I didn’t want to talk about inane topics with you; I wanted to talk about us. I was thankful for having the excuse of bringing Samson the next day because I was going to take the opportunity and speak to your father and ask for your hand in marriage.”
“But then the accident happened.” Amelia’s thoughts were racing; he wanted to marry her! Never in her wildest dreams had she imagined he wanted her just as much as she wanted him. Well, maybe occasionally she had dared to dream it, but she had soon tried to push those thoughts to one side as ridiculous. Now, he was before her declaring that he did indeed wish to marry her! Or at least, he had before he regained some vision. She paused, ready for him to continue.
“Yes, didn’t that scupper my plans!” Alexander said wryly. “I will never forget the first time I was able to look at you. You were sleeping and looked pale and fragile, and I cursed myself because I’d caused you to look that way. It was strange though; it was as if I’d seen you before. I pondered why your features were so familiar to me; was it that I’d actually noticed you before Trafalgar? But it would have been too easy for me to have secretly admired you. No, I hadn’t noticed you, but I
knew
you, if that makes sense. All I can put it down to is that, because of listening more carefully than I would have done normally, I already knew so much of what makes you so special.”
“I’m not beautiful, and you once said I was,” Amelia interrupted, realising that he had seen her when he uttered those words.
“But don’t you see that you are to me? You are the person who can say something and make me laugh when anyone else would make me grumble. You are the one who could frighten Napoleon with one glare when she is displeased, but who looks at me with the most love and tenderness I have ever seen; it almost takes my breath away,” Alexander said gently. “To me you are beautiful, and nothing you say will ever change my mind about that.”
“I think you may have damaged your brain during the fall,” Amelia responded.
Alexander dragged her to him and roughly kissed her. He held her face between his hands and kissed her with such force it made her breathless with need. Eventually he pulled away slightly, still holding her face between his hands. “Each time you dismiss the fact that you are beautiful that will be the consequence, no matter where we are.”
“I think we may be the talk of society before very long,” Amelia responded, but her pupils were dilated with the effects of the kisses.
Alexander laughed. “Good! I never expected a boring life with you.”
Amelia pulled away a little; she needed to clarify things. “Are you asking me to marry you Alexander?”
“I would, but I can’t,” Alexander replied honestly.
Amelia bristled. “Why not?”
“I promised your father I would not speak to you about it; I’ve already asked for his permission, and he’s refused.” This was the part of the evening that could go wrong in so many ways for Alexander.
“Why did he refuse?” Amelia asked incredulously.
“He said I wasn’t good enough for you, and I can’t argue against that,” Alexander answered.
“Pah! Fiddlesticks!” Amelia responded. “My father has given me lectures on more than one occasion about us all being equal. Why would he say that to you?”
“He wants what’s best for his daughter. I can completely understand his sentiments. To be honest I’m still struggling to find a way of convincing him otherwise.”
“Alexander, my brain is mush at the moment,” Amelia said. “Please let me try to clarify this; if my father gave his approval you would wish to marry me?”
“If you’ll have me,” Alexander responded, for the first time not sounding as confident as he had so far.
Amelia smiled and reached up to stroke Alexander’s face. It was the first time she had touched him apart from when he was kissing her. “Of course, I want to marry you. I think I have since the first day I saw you three years ago.”
“And can you forgive my stupidity then?” Alexander said with feeling.
“If you can forgive my self-doubt.”
“What are we going to do to persuade your father?”
“Leave my father to me,” came the firm response.
Chapter 17
Amelia stepped out of the sedan chair knowing she could not rejoin her mother and father at the ball. The nicely pinned hairstyle was no more. Even without a looking glass she knew she looked as though she had been thoroughly kissed. A smile turned her lips up; oh yes, she had been thoroughly kissed.
She approached Alexander’s brother. “My Lord, I would be grateful if you could send a message to my mother and explain that I have had to return home. Would it be asking too much for me to share your carriage on your return with your brother to the Golden Lion? It would be easier than trying to organise my father’s carriage.”
“Of course. My carriage is just waiting for my signal to return my brother and myself to the inn. I expect Mr Critchley will wish to remain at the ball.”
Anthony gave a footman a message, and he moved into the darkness to organise the carriage; then Anthony left Amelia to return to Alexander while he delivered a message to Mrs Basingstoke. He did not try to persuade Amelia to tell him about what had happened with his brother; her sparkling eyes told him all he needed to know at the moment.
Amelia returned to Alexander’s arms, slipping her hands behind his head and pulling his face to her. “I think we have a few minutes until the carriage arrives,” she said.
“Let’s make the most of them then,” Alexander said with a growl and kissed her without further delay.
*
Amelia paced her bedchamber floor. She had to get this right or the result would be the loss of the man she loved or the father she adored; neither option was worth consideration. Her thoughts had been a muddle since her return home.
She smiled. It had been wonderful travelling in Lord Newton’s carriage while having her hand held by Alexander. He had sat next to her, his leg touching hers, his hand holding her hand as if he would never let her go. When the carriage had stopped Alexander had kissed her on the lips in plain sight of his brother. Amelia had never blushed as much in her life, but Alexander had just laughed at his brother’s embarrassed cough.
Now she had to try and sort out her thoughts in order to convince her father to give them his blessing. She heard the carriage arrive; it was only a little after midnight, her mother not keen on staying out all night. Remaining in her bedchamber until the voices died down ensured that she would not meet her mother on the stairs when she went to speak to her father.
Mr Basingstoke always enjoyed a glass or two of brandy after an evening out. He said it was to help him reflect on the evening’s events; the children all suspected it was to escape from the minute by minute recounting of the evening that Mrs Basingstoke enjoyed.
Amelia picked up her woollen shawl and left the warmth of her bedchamber. The house was quiet as she walked down the stairs; already the heat of the building was being replaced by the chilly air of midwinter. She opened the door to the study and was grateful the fire was still burning in the grate.
“Papa, have you got a moment?”
“Of course, my dear, come in,” Mr Basingstoke said, moving from behind the desk to one of the chairs near the fire. “We were surprised that you left so early; I hope you aren’t ailing. Do you need the doctor?”
“I’m fine, or I will be after we’ve spoken,” Amelia admitted, sitting in the chair opposite her father. He was very dear to her with his ready smile and calm, quiet ways but, for the first time in her life, she was about to go against his wishes if she could not change his mind.
“Should I pour myself a larger brandy?” Mr Basingstoke asked pleasantly.
“Maybe, although it might be me who needs the fortifying,” Amelia said honestly.
“Now you have my complete attention!”
“I would like to receive your blessing to marry Captain Worthington,” Amelia said, deciding that the direct approach was the best.
“I see,” Mr Basingstoke replied, placing his glass on the side table. “And did the captain explain my reasons for not giving my blessing when he initially asked for it?”
“Yes, and before you condemn him, he agrees with you,” Amelia defended her beloved.
“And yet he still chose to tell you even though I asked him for his confidence in the matter?”
Mr Basingstoke never lost his temper, but Amelia could see that her father was not pleased. “Papa, what is your objection to him?”
“Truthfully? I think he does not care for you the way you do for him. The way a man should who professes to want to marry you,” Mr Basingstoke said seriously. “I realise that if our neighbours knew of my refusal they would question my sanity that such an eligible offer for my daughter should be refused. I don’t suppose Captain Worthington has ever been told ‘no’ in his entire life.”
“I accused him of being aloof before his injury, but he was no worse than anyone else in the
ton
. To hear you speak would suggest that you wish to set him up as some sort of an example as if to punish him,” Amelia said her tone quiet, but showing surprise.
“I want what is best for you,” Mr Basingstoke insisted.
“And if that is to be married to Captain Worthington?”
“You will be selling yourself short, Amelia. I would hate to see you wilt in an unhappy marriage.”
Amelia stood and started to pace the small study. She gritted her teeth in frustration before coming to a stop behind the chair she had just vacated. She gripped the chair in her hands. “Papa, I’m three and twenty. I returned to you expecting to end my days as a spinster. Yes, we all expected me to marry when I set-out on my journey to London three years ago, but we were naïve.”
“You are a handsome girl; the lack of dowry should not have mattered.”
Amelia looked at her father and realised something for the first time: He was a hopeless romantic. She had always known he had married for love but, until now, the reality had not sunk in with her. She sighed before speaking. “Papa, there are hundreds, yes hundreds, of unmarried girls all with dowries and all prettier than I.” She held her hand up to stop her father’s interruption. “No. I’m not being overly harsh on myself or fishing for compliments. I saw it with my own eyes. There were far prettier girls than I sitting on those wallflower benches, Papa. Younger, prettier, richer girls will find themselves as spinsters at the end of the season and, no, none of us deserve it, but that is the reality. We decide we are going to try our luck in London when in reality the dowry-less ones of us should be trying our luck where the odds are slightly more in our favour.”
“That doesn’t mean you should accept just anyone, Amelia.”
“No, I shouldn’t, and I wouldn’t, I can assure you,” Amelia responded. “Did you not listen to me when I returned? I fell in love with Captain Worthington the moment I first saw him. After seeing him, watching him during that first year there was no one else I could ever be with. I didn’t fully realise that until this season when we started to spend time together in Green Park. Until then, it was just love of him as a figure, but once I got to know him, I was completely lost to anyone else, even if there had been anyone else. I love him, Papa, and only him.” Tears had sprung into Amelia’s eyes as she spoke, the depth of her feelings only just being realised by herself.
“But if things had been different—”
“Yes, I would never have had this opportunity. I will be happy Papa; I believe he has feelings for me. He might not love me quite as much as I love him, sometimes, one loves more than the other; we have both seen such marriages, but it is enough for me.”
“Are you sure you know what you are doing Amelia? I would hate to see him turn away from you when he returns to his life in London. I’m realistic enough to realise you won’t be accepted into the highest circles.”
“I’ve never wanted that,” Amelia said with a smile. “I realise there will be difficulties, but he is a good man who is flawed, and I love him dearly.”
“I only want you to be happy, my dear,” Mr Basingstoke said, finally acknowledging that he could not refuse his favourite child his blessing.
“I promise you I will be,” Amelia said, moving from behind the chair and crouching at her father’s feet, wrapping her arms around his waist. “You will come to love him Papa, I promise.”
“I hope he appreciates you; I really do.”
“He is aware that he’ll have eight angry brothers and one angry father if he doesn’t,” Amelia said with a smile and a kiss on her father’s cheek. “Thank you, Papa.”
*
The day Mr Basingstoke walked his only daughter down the aisle was the happiest and saddest day of his life. He was happy he had seen for himself the adoration that shone from Captain Worthington’s eyes when he had turned to see his bride walk down the aisle, but he was giving his darling girl away to another and felt a pang of sadness in his chest at the loss.
Amelia had glowed in her ivory satin dress. The pearl clips in her hair were the same ones that had been scattered on the floor of the sedan chair only weeks before. An amber necklace adorned her neck, a present from William who could not join her on her happy day.
The couple clung to each other’s hands as they said their vows, looking deeply into the other’s eyes, seeming to forget there was anyone else in the church with them, they were so engrossed in their own little world.
The wedding breakfast was eaten at the Basingstoke household; Lord Newton had insisted on paying for the feast as a thank you to the Basingstoke’s for the care they had given to his brother during those difficult days after the operation. Amelia had been thankful that her wedding had not been a drain on the family’s resources and pleased at the way Anthony had tactfully addressed the subject.
Alexander had tried to reassure his father-in-law of his commitment to his precious daughter, but Mr Basingstoke had to admit early on during the visits before the wedding that Alexander was proving a doting suitor. Amelia had felt a sense of contentment that she had never expected when witnessing her father and her beloved laughing together.
Eventually the wedding breakfast was finished, and Amelia was helped into the Newton carriage in readiness for their journey. They were going immediately to Anthony’s home, but Anthony was travelling with Richard to give the newly-weds some privacy. He was more than happy to hear that Alexander was selling his house in Jermyn Street and setting up a home somewhere outside the capital when husband and wife had the time and opportunity to decide which town or village appealed to them the most. In the meantime they were to stay with Anthony and his family.
If Richard felt a pang of remorse at the news that Alexander was selling his London home, he hid it well. He was genuinely happy for his friend and, if he still had a few reservations about Miss Basingstoke, time would prove to him that Alexander had married his equal in every way.
The London gossips might have speculated about the marriage announcement in the Times for a morning, but in the main, Miss Basingstoke was too far beneath their notice, and Captain Worthington was no longer in the centre of their little circle for them to waste much time on the matter. The news had more of an impact in the home of Sir Jeremy Basingstoke. Lady Basingstoke berated Serena for a whole week about letting a rich captain be won by their lowly cousin when Serena should have had him entangled long before Amelia had her grip in him. Serena sent an insincere letter to Amelia which was dealt with appropriately, along with the letter from Lady Basingstoke suggesting that Amelia might like to invite Serena to stay with the newlyweds; both letters were unceremoniously thrown in the fire by Alexander before Amelia had time to stop him.
And Samson. The loyal dog remained at Captain Worthington’s side until the golden-haired protector was too old to provide assistance any longer. He was then given the most comfortable situation in the drawing room of the Worthington home and fussed over by everyone who entered. He eventually died peacefully in his sleep, having been loved more than any animal could expect.
Long before he had become infirm, a partner had been found for Samson and Bella, a very placid St Johns dog had given her beau many litters of little ones. Ben, one of the litter had stood out almost from the time he was born and was trained as Samson had been. He definitely was an off-spring to be proud of as he took to guiding Alexander just as well as his father had before him and, as such, Alexander still had Samson’s needed support through Ben.
Every day Alexander awoke, he would gaze at his sleeping wife. They both appreciated that his sight might not last forever, and Alexander wanted to make sure his memory would be full of images of Amelia even if the darkness returned.
When Amelia started to increase, Alexander marvelled that he would be able to see his children, something he had never dared to hope for in those first dark days after Trafalgar. When in later years his sight did dim a little he was able to rely on Ben more, but his five sons and six daughters all grew up happy to support their darling father.
From facing a life full of darkness, Alexander was facing years of light and laughter because of one young lady who had been placed with the wallflowers unwanted by those who thought themselves the best that society offered. He was forever grateful and in love with his wallflower, his darling Amelia.
The End