The Couple who Fooled the World (6 page)

But not his mind. They had nothing of his mind. Only his body.

He didn’t want to go back to that. Didn’t want to spend any time reliving it. Which was why it was better to simply let go of physical pleasure. He didn’t know how to handle it all in the right way anyway. It wasn’t the same for him.

But Julia was a woman. A normal woman, who was not unaffected by his touch and that meant he had to be careful. He wasn’t going to use her body against her. He was determined not to do that, no matter what.

There were depths he would not sink to. He would use her, but only so far as she used him. But in terms of sexual desire they were on two different playing fields, and he would never, ever do to her what had been done to him.

He would never use her body to his own ends. Because he could. It would be so very easy…

“Well, that’s a relief. And also, gentlemanly to give me the bed.”

“I assume you’re paying for the room.”

“But you’re my date,” she said.

“I’m Guest. You’re the name on the invitation. And you footing the bill is the only thing giving you a preferential sleeping position, so if you want me to pay…”

“I’m pretty sure I can afford it, Ferro, or did you not see that I’m the richest woman in the world.”

“I did, it was an interesting article.”

“Well, I can afford a hotel room. And I want the bed.”

“I can afford one, too.”

“Yeah, yeah, I read your article, too. And hey, you were reading about me?” The expression on her face was funny, a mix of delight and insecurity. Julia was a savvy businesswoman, no question, but there was something beneath it, too. Something that seemed to shine through the armor sometimes. A glimpse at someone young, easily excited and bursting with dreams.

He wondered why she covered that part of herself up in black and leather. Why she tried to pretend she was blasé and unaffected when she was clearly anything but. He wondered why she’d put on her armor in the first place.

“I was reading the article, it turned out you were the star.”

“Yeah, I’ve done all right for myself. We’ve done all right for ourselves.” That made his stomach feel odd.

“We have.”

“So, I’m going to go and get back to my desk and my assistant
that does not treat me like the dirt on the bottom of his shoes. Will you need me for anything else this week?”

“I shouldn’t. We don’t need the business proposal in for another two weeks.”

“Great, then I’ll spend the week getting everything in order for me to be gone for a few days. And I’ll uh…see you at the wedding.”

She turned and walked out of the office, her strides long and purposeful, the flick of her long blond hair leaving a cloud of lavender behind.

Any normal man would surely be plotting to seduce her over the weekend. He imagined if she had brought another date, she would have been seduced.

Instead she was bringing him. And seduction was not on his agenda. He was far too familiar with it, and it had left a bad taste in his mouth that lingered years after the fact.

This was all about business. And he no longer had to use his body for the sake of business. Now it was just a matter of chipping away at his soul, when the occasion demanded. Lucky for him, he was so accustomed to it that it barely hurt anymore.

No, he’d managed to find ways to block all that out. And now, even when he wanted to feel something, all that remained was a dark, empty void. He had removed his pain, along with everything good.

He looked around his office, at the pristine, glimmering room that was evidence of all he had achieved. The trade, in his estimation, had been worth it.

CHAPTER SIX

I
T WAS OFFICIAL,
her Alaska outfit was kick-ass. Which was good, because she needed a little of that to get her through dealing with a long weekend of Ferro in a hotel room.
Gulp
.

She tugged at the zipper on her black jacket and put her hands on her hips, black leather pants feeling appropriately tough and awesome against her skin. Then she crossed her arms beneath her breasts and waited on the already-way-too-warm-for-these-clothes tarmac for Ferro to arrive so she could board his private plane.

Clothes really did do something for the way she felt. She’d doubted that when she’d first been thrust into the public arena. Monochromatic had always been her strategy. Black helped her match and blend in. And especially after the assault she’d stopped trying to fit in and just gone with baggy T-shirts with funny sayings and baggy pants with too many zippers.

She didn’t wear color. Especially pink. Not after the prom dress.

You’ll look so pretty in it, honey
.

The image of her standing in front of the mirror at the department store, her mother behind her, beaming, flashed through her mind. They’d spent hours dress shopping after Michael had asked her to be his date.

That same dress had been torn, destroyed by the end of the night. And when she’d taken it off, let it fall to the bathroom
floor before stepping into the shower to scrub the blood and pain and shame away, she’d vowed she would never wear that stupid, insipid color again.

At first, her publicist and stylist had tried to push her into softer clothes, but eventually, they’d figured out a style that kept some of her edge while giving her polish.

It was armor. It made her look more like she wanted to feel. Tougher, more in control. Like she had mastered that silly girl looking desperately for acceptance. Like she was tough enough to take on the world. She still felt like a shivery mass of Jell-O inside half the time.

But hey, at least she looked the part, even if she couldn’t be the part.

“All ready for snowdrifts, I see.”

She turned and watched Ferro stride toward her, with a fully appropriate level of female appreciation for the way the man looked in a pair of dark jeans that rode low on lean hips, a white, button-up shirt with sleeves pushed up to his elbows and a leather bag slung over his shoulder.

“And you’re not.”

“Well, I thought I might change on the plane. It has more bedrooms than the hotel suite you booked us.”

“Aha. Ha, ha. Cute, Calvaresi.”

“But it is true.”

“Well, I’ll find out soon, won’t I?” She picked her suitcase up from the ground and looked at him. “Give the order, or, whatever you have to do to get this show on the road. I don’t want to linger on the runway. I’m sweltering.”

He smiled and pulled his phone out of his jacket pocket.

“You know, there’s a faster, better phone than that on the market,” she said. “OnePhone. To rule them all.”

“Better is a generalization and is also subjective. Also, your phone is only faster when it’s able to hook up to your
special cell towers which is in…remind me, Julia, ten percent of cases?”

She smiled. “Twelve. But we’re expanding.”

“Right, right.” He pushed a button on his phone and the door to the plane opened, the stairs lowering. “In the meantime, my phone continues to be functional. And it makes calls without dropping them.”

“Yeah, super functional. I bet all the people with private planes want your phone. Meanwhile, the masses who want to fling birds at pigs, really like my phone.”

“A waste of tech.”

“No, it’s not.” She started climbing the stairs and ducked her head when she entered the plane. “Nice. Bigger than mine,” she said, sitting on one of the plush leather sofas. “Anyway, when I was in high school, we were all starting to get phones. And they did one thing, they made calls. Great. The screens were black-and-white, the ring tones were monophonic. Really rich kids got a laptop, too. Now? Now a whole computer is available on your phone. Web browsing, videos and, yes, games. Accessibility. There’s a price point, not just for phones, but for all technology for almost everyone now. Information, entertainment. All in your hand.”

“I’m going to skip the potential double entendre inherent in comments about handheld entertainment.”

She curled her lip. “Please do.”

“But I do see your point. You see yourself as a bit of a revolutionary, don’t you?”

“I do. We’re changing the landscape here, Ferro, changing the way people interact and learn. It’s an amazing thing we do here.”

“I’m just in it for the money,” he said.

“Really?” She studied his expression, tried to get a read on him. “I don’t believe that. You have to have a passion for this.”

“No, Julia, I don’t. I’m good with computers, I picked up
an understanding of them easy, but like every other thing in my life, they were just a way out. I only care about the money. That’s why, in the end, I’m your biggest threat, and don’t forget it. Hamlin likes power, and one day, soon, I hope, he’ll have reached for too much too soon. You are a visionary. Passionate and idealistic, and mark my words, that will be your downfall. All I care about is getting ahead. I don’t care about right, or wrong. I only care about winning the game.”

There was such a bleak hardness to his statement. Such cold calculation. But she wasn’t sure if there was truth to it. She was almost positive he believed it to be true, though she wasn’t sure why he needed to.

Finally she spoke. “What happens at the end? What happens when you’re done and there’s nothing left to do?”

“I find a new game.” No emotion in his tone, no fire.

“I’ll take passion and the potential to lose then,” she said. “I think it’s more fun.”

“I haven’t had the luxury of having fun in my life.”

“You’re a billionaire, Ferro, several times over. Relax and enjoy it.”

He shook his head and the engine on the plane kicked into gear, the roaring in her ears as it started to move down the runway. “That’s something you learn early on when you live on the street,
cara
. Never get comfortable. Never take it for granted. You never sleep. Not really. You have to be ready to jump up and fight for your life at any given moment. Complacency will be the death of you, and I believe it’s true in business, as well.”

Julia’s throat tightened. “And now…now that you have your mansion with all your security…do you sleep now?”

He shook his head slowly, his eyes focused on a point past her. “No.”

“Then you might as well be back on the street.”

He laughed. “I fight every day to make sure I never go back.”

“Your life sounds exhausting.”

“This from the woman with boundless energy?”

She shrugged. “I’m happy, though. It’s easier to live when you’re happy.”

“Why are you happy?”

“I have my dream job. Friends. Family.” She nearly stumbled over that word. She hardly ever spoke to her parents. Could hardly speak to her mother at all. “Why wouldn’t I be happy?”

“Why so much armor, then? If you’re so happy, why are you so well-protected?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He leaned forward, extending his hand and sliding his thumb and forefinger over the collar of her jacket. “You know full well what I’m talking about. I’m talking about this.”

“Are your suits armor, Ferro? Or are they just something you wear to create an image.”

“Armor,” he said. “So that no one can say I look like the street urchin that I am. So that, no matter the rumors, I look like a man who earned my success, rather than a man who slept his way to the top. Underneath, though, it doesn’t change a damn thing, that’s the rub.”

“It does. I would feel a lot worse about myself if I had to go up on stage for presentations with my limp hair, braces and baggy shirts.”

“But it doesn’t change you. Not really. If it did, even if you were in baggy T-shirts you would feel confident.”

“Such an expert for a man who is so freaking dysfunctional.”

“But I’m right. You know I am.”

“So? Everyone does it. You do it, you just said.” He nodded. “I suppose they do. Image, as they say, is everything.
Unlike you, though, I don’t pretend that I’m all right.”

She didn’t like that assessment. Didn’t like that he seemed to think she was pretending to be fine. Or that it felt true. In that moment, she felt very much like the girl she’d been in high school, like a little kid playing dress up.

“Well, when you’re comfortable throwing off your image, I’ll ditch mine,” she said.

“I’m not challenging you. I’m not even judging you. I’m the last person in a position to pass judgment, and I think we both know that. I’m simply stating a fact. You hide a lot, Julia. I can feel it.”

She didn’t like it at all. Didn’t like that he knew just what her butt-kicking outfit was for. It made it feel less effective. And he was right, the change wasn’t any deeper than her skin, because if it was, he wouldn’t have been able to shake her confidence half so quickly.

Jerk.

“Well, next time I’m in the mood for a psychoanalysis I’ll hire a professional, okay? I don’t need my head read by a guy who has more issues than I do.”

She leaned back in her seat, crossed her arms and legs, wiggling her foot in an effort to keep from leaping up and pacing the length of the plane.

“Anyway,” she said. “How happy are you?”

“I never said I was happy.” He slid his hand over his chin. “I’m not sure I even know what happiness is. But I am winning the game, and to me that’s all that counts.”

“This is incredible.” Julia shoved her hands in her pockets and blew out a breath that clouded in front of her face and hung in the crisp, cold air for a moment before fading away on the wind.

The hotel was set on the edge of a lake, surrounded by
mountains and tall evergreen trees that secluded them in a wall of green and blues.

Ferro looked around, his expression impassive.

“You don’t seem thrilled,” she said, pulling a scarf out of her bag and wrapping it around her neck.

“I don’t like the cold,” he said simply, walking toward the entrance of the hotel.

It was made from rough hewn logs, polished and stained the color of honey. A luxury cabin set out in the wilderness. She’d been completely taken with the city when she’d moved out West to California. With the heat and palm trees. With the sheer difference between Cali and her hometown. But this was something else entirely, more incredible in some ways. Because all people could hope to do was come out here and survive. No matter how beautiful the hotel was, it seemed pulled into the landscape. As if the wild had claimed it, rather than humans claiming any sort of civilization.

“Then we’ll go inside,” she said, following him through the glass doors that slid open and admitted them into the lobby. “Nice,” she said, looking around at the sleek, wood interior. “Big fish statue.” She pointed to the iron representation of a sockeye salmon. “That’s pretty cool. And hey, it’s for sale. I could buy it and stick it in my house.” She was rambling and she wasn’t sure why. Maybe because she was getting used to wicked Ferro and stoic Ferro was throwing her off a little bit.

“I would like to see that, Julia,” he said. “A salmon in your beachfront mansion.”

“Hey, it’s…sort of to theme.”

“And sort of not.”

She smiled and tried to draw a smile out of him. She managed, but there was something terribly false about it. And she didn’t know if it was because this one was false, where all the others had been real. Or if she was just seeing something different
in his expression after their conversation on the plane. After his assertion that he didn’t know what happiness was.

This was exactly what she was afraid of. That more time with Ferro would make him human. would make her get him. Might make her care.

No way. Ferro was a jerk. She could not, would not, care about him.

“Just a second and I’ll check in,” she said.

Ferro looked around the lobby and waited for the sophisticated heating system to take effect. He didn’t know why he’d let the temperature bother him. It wasn’t like he hadn’t experienced cold in the past few years, but truth be told, he did go out of his way to avoid it.

And ever since they’d gotten off the plane he’d been battling with the thought of what it would have been like to be stuck outside here. To have to suffer through a night dealing with the elements.

The fact that he’d moved to a place with a temperate climate wasn’t by chance. He liked to be warm. Didn’t like to remember what it was like to sleep on cold cement or dirt, covered in cardboard.

It was the same reason he didn’t like to be hungry. The same reason he didn’t deal with relationships.

He didn’t like reminders. Reminders of how worn down he’d been when Claudia had found him. She’d seen him standing on the street, asking for work. And she’d offered.

Do you want a bed to sleep in tonight, sweetheart?

He still remembered her first words to him. The way her perfume smelled. How his skin had smelled after, her perfume clinging to him along with his shame. She had paid a lot of money for his virginity. She’d found it exciting to train him. And it had provided him with a week’s worth of food and a small hotel room. One night of sex, a week of comfort.

And when his money was spent, Claudia found him again.

I need you again, sweetheart. And when I’m done with you…I have friends, you know? Lonely. Neglected by their husbands. I’m sure they’d love a chance to get to play with you. If you say yes, forget staying in a little hotel. You can buy your own place. How does that sound? Independence? Heat?

Impossible to turn down. But every dollar earned cost so damn much.

“All checked in!”

He looked at Julia, at Her figure, the way her clothes, even her down-lined trench coat, conformed to her body. She would be warm. He didn’t doubt that. Her skin was soft, he knew that already. And she would be warm.

He flexed his fingers, curled his hand into a fist, trying to get the phantom impression of her flesh off him.

A strange sort of heat fired its way through him. Just the thought of her warmed him when, a moment before, he’d been freezing from the inside out. Interesting. But not something he was going to pay attention to.

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