Authors: Margaret Mayhew
Stew picked the redhead up in a bar off Piccadilly. He'd checked into a small hotel in Bayswater, had a couple of grogs at the Boomerang Club in Australia House and then sank a couple more at a nearby pub where there was nothing on offer that took his fancy. He'd pushed on to try his luck elsewhere and spotted the girl as soon as he walked in the door. She was just the job: a good-looker there to pick up someone like him. She'd been giving some Pom Army bod the big brush-off and he moved smoothly into the vacuum. He never usually had much of a problem â all
it took was nerve and as much charm as he could muster.
Her name was Doreen and she'd taken him for a Yank at first because of his odd-coloured uniform. He guessed she'd been a mite disappointed to find out he was only an Aussie, but he didn't blame her for that: the Yanks had the loot, after all. He'd seen them cruising about with fistfuls of notes and pockets loaded with change, grabbing taxis and restaurant tables and girls. Money talked. Still, he'd saved up enough for a decent meal and plenty of booze. She wouldn't need to grumble.
He shot the usual line about what he did, tapping the side of his nose. âCan't tell you, sweetie. Top secret.'
She peeked at him around a Veronica Lake hairdo. âAw, come on. I've heard that one before. You blokes think we're all born yesterday.'
âWell, I can tell you I'm on bombers.'
She leaned forward from her bar stool, showing a nice bit of cleavage, and tapped the one-winged badge on his chest with its woven âB'. âWhat's that for, then?'
âB for Bombers, like I told you.'
âSo, what happened to the other wing?'
âGot shot off, darling.' He put his thumb and forefinger a quarter of an inch apart. âIt was that close.'
She laughed. âPull the other one.'
He knew they liked it best if you were a fighter pilot, but bombers were OK too, so long as you played your cards right. Not so glamorous maybe but by the time you'd spun a few horror stories they ended up thinking you a helluva brave hero.
He took her to the Strand Palace for dinner. He'd
been there before and the food was all right, even if the steak was horse. She was a notch above most of the girls he'd picked up on leave and good company, too. He found out that she worked as a counter assistant in the hosiery department of Swan and Edgar's and lived with her widowed mother out in the suburbs.
âShe know what you get up to?'
Doreen widened her eyes. âGet up to?'
âGoing to bars on your own. Talking to strangers.'
âThat's what
you
do, isn't it?'
âDifferent for men.'
âWhy? You Aussies are the end. I met some of your Army blokes once. You treat women like muck.'
âNo we don't. We're just a bit old-fashioned.'
âMust be something to do with living upside down. The blood stays in your head.'
He grinned. âYou've got that wrong, sweetheart.'
They went back to his hotel and nipped in past the receptionist when she had her back turned. Doreen was everything he'd hoped and guessed she'd be, and they both had a bloody good time. It reminded him of the old joke: Question: Have you ever slept with a redhead? Answer: Not a wink. Not that Doreen was a real one; it came out of a bottle, he could see that, but she was worth the steep price of the dinner. Too bloody right, she was.
He lit two cigarettes in his mouth and passed one to her as she lay beside him.
âWhat d'you say, we meet up again?'
âMmmm. If you like, Stew.'
âTomorrow?'
âBetter not. I ought to go home and see Mum.'
âDay after, then.'
âOK.' She turned her head to smile at him. âYou're not half bad, you know . . . and I've never seen anything like what you've got.'
He took it as the considerable compliment it was intended to be. It wasn't the first time he'd been told that.
He saw her several more times during his time in London and though it cost him all his savings, he still thought she was worth it. Any amount was worth it, he thought grimly, when it could be the last time ever. They talked about meeting again next time he got leave.
âWhen's that?' she asked.
âIn six weeks.' If I haven't copped it, he added to himself.
She laid a hand on his bare stomach, fingers playing the piano up and down, twirling the dark hairs. âThat's a long way away, Stew.'
âWell, maybe you could come up to Lincolnshire before then. I can get a night pass. I'd send you the fare.'
âWhere would I stay?'
He thought for a moment. A bed and breakfast with a nosy landlady wouldn't do. There was The Saracen's Head but it always had a mob from the station. He racked his brains for somewhere a bit quieter.
âThere's a place in Lincoln called The Angel.'
âWhat's it like?'
âBit of a morgue. Stags' heads and potted palms, but the bedrooms're probably OK. I'll go take a dekko.'
She sighed, fingers still playing. âIt'll be a long time to wait.'
He rolled over towards her. âWho said anything about waiting?'
When his mother opened the door to him, the first thing Jock noticed was the bruise at the corner of her right eye. It didn't surprise him. She'd had bruises on her ever since he could remember â usually starting on a Friday night because that was when his father got paid and drank most of his wages on the way home. Her face lit up with a pathetic gladness.
âJock . . . oh, Jock.'
He set down his kit-bag on the step and took her in his arms. She felt thinner and frailer than ever â skin and bone under the pinafore. She was wearing a scarf tied like a turban round her head, and a few wisps of hair, the same dark red as his own, straggled free at the front. When she drew back he saw tears in her eyes. She wiped them away quickly with her hand.
âI didna expect you yet.'
âI was lucky with the trains.'
He'd stood all the way on the long journey from Lincoln to Glasgow and it was a trip he'd never have made if it hadn't been for her. She was the only reason he hadn't walked out of this slum the very first day he could and never come back.
âCome on in,' she was saying, tucking her arm through his. âYou're all wet and you'll be very tired. I'll put the kettle on.'
He closed the door on the rain and the cobbled street. His mother hurried to take down the line of washing strung across the ceiling, as though he were some sort of honoured guest.
âLeave it all be, Mother.'
She stopped, his father's patched and yellowed combinations pressed to her chest. How he'd always hated the sight of those things hanging up there. How he'd hated anything and everything to do with the brute: the very sight, sound and smell of him.
âThey're dry,' she said timidly. âI'll put them away.'
She went into the bedroom. He took off his forage cap and stood looking round at the kitchen, noting that nothing had changed, unless it was to get even more squalid. She kept it as best she could, he knew, but it was an uphill struggle against hopeless odds. Out of the corner of his eye he saw something dart along the wainscoting. The whole building was crawling with vermin of one kind or another. And that included his father.
When his mother came back she had taken off her pinafore and the turban scarf and brushed out the hair that was her one undimmed beauty. She smiled at him. âI'd just got back from the factory. Lucky you didn't come sooner.'
âHow's it going there?'
âOch, it's no so bad.'
She was slaving long hours and overtime at a bench making ships' rivets. He hated the thought of it but there was nothing to be done. Before that, she'd charred all day and taken in washing and sewing, so seeing her worn out was nothing new to him. And it wouldn't make any difference how hard she worked; most of what she earned would be drunk away by his father.
The kettle started whistling on the hob and she spooned a small and carefully measured amount of tea into the pot and poured on the boiling water.
âI saved some extra, Jock. And we've a tin of spam
for later. For a treat.' She fetched a cup and saucer and set it on the table. âSit yourself down.'
âAre you no having some?'
She shook her head. âIt's just for you. Would you like a bite to eat now? I've got some bread and a bit o' marg.'
âNo. I'll wait.'
She sat down opposite him and poured the tea. Compared with the brew out of the Mess urns, it was weak as water.
âDo they feed you enough in the Air Force?'
âAye. I reckon we do better than civilians.'
âWell, that's only right. They've got to keep the forces strong an' fit.' Her eyes searched his face. âYou're looking well, Jock. I was worried they might be working you too hard.'
âWe get plenty of rest,' he said. She'd no idea that he was flying on bombing raids and he'd no intention of telling her.
âWell, drink up your tea, then.'
He drank a mouthful to please her and then fished in his breast pocket. âI've brought something for you.'
âFor me?'
He slid the little brown paper package across the table towards her. âAye, Mother. A present.'
She took it as wonderingly as a child.
âGo on, then. Open it.' He watched her unwrap the paper and stare at the shiny tube. âIt's a lipstick,' he said when she made no move to touch it. âI hope the colour's right.'
There hadn't been much of a choice. The spiv in the Lincoln pub had fanned out a palmful of them and he'd tried to pick out a colour that seemed right for her.
Calypso Coral.
It had been a shot in the
dark, since he could never remember her ever wearing any.
âA lipstick,' she repeated. âI've never had one.'
âWell you've got one now.'
âWherever did you get it? It must have cost a fortune.'
He could tell by the tremor in her voice and the way she was blinking that she was fighting back tears.
âOch no. Look, you take the top off and twist the end so it comes up . . .' He showed her. âDo you like the colour?'
âIt's beautiful, Jock. But whenever will I wear it?'
âWhat's wrong with now, this minute?'
She bit her lip. âYour father'll be back any moment. I don't know what he'd sayâ'
âWhat does it matter what
he
says? Who cares?'
To his shame, she flinched at his outburst. âWell, you know how he is, Jock.'
âAye,' he said dourly. âI know how he is.'
How could he not know? His earliest memories were of his father coming home blind drunk and taking his belt to him for no reason at all. Of his mother's terrified pleadings as she tried to shield him with her own body, and the blows that then rained on her as well. Of lying on his mattress bed in his dark corner behind the plywood partition, shivering and shaking beneath the ragged blanket and listening to more blows falling, more piteous cries, mingled with the foul-mouthed abuse and threats that froze his blood.
It had gone on until the day when he had grown big enough and brave enough to stand up to his father â the day when he had gone for him and knocked him to the floor where he'd stayed, unconscious. It was the last time his father had thrashed him and so long as
he was around, his mother was safe, too, but when he'd got his apprenticeship with the RAF and gone away he'd known that it would all start again. He'd begged her to leave, to walk out and find somewhere to live near him at Holton. And he'd gone on begging for years. As soon as he earned he would have supported her, taken care of her, given her a new life, but she'd refused to do it. âI canna leave him, Jock,' she'd kept repeating stubbornly. âHe's my husband.' In the end, he'd given up, but he'd never understood. He felt bitter towards her; blamed her for what she had let him suffer, and for allowing herself to go on suffering so stupidly and so pointlessly. It made no sense to him at all.
She got up and went to the mirror hanging on the wall by its rusty chain. He watched as she applied the lipstick, following the line of her lips very slowly and carefully. Then she turned round. It was a shock, at first, to see her like that â the red so vivid in her white face, so unaccustomed â but when she smiled at him hesitantly, he caught a sudden glimpse of the bonny woman she might have been.
He smiled back. âAye, it suits you fine, Mother. Just fine.'
She opened her mouth to say something but the sound of the outside door opening stopped her. He knew it was his father by the crash of it shutting again and by the lurching tread. He rose to his feet and waited.
His father flung open the door and leaned unsteadily against the post. He looked even worse than Jock remembered â older, meaner, dirtier and drunker.
âOch, look who's turned up like a bad penny, then . . .'
âHallo, Father.'
âWhat're you doing here? Thought we weren't guid enough for you.'
âI came to see Mother.'
âDid you now . . . where is the woman?' The bloodshot eyes swivelled and re-focussed. âThere she is. Come here, Jessie. Come here where I can see you.'
His mother crept forward, cringing, the back of one hand held across her mouth.
âWhat's the matter wi' you, for God's sake?' His father lunged and grabbed at the hand. âWhat's that muck on your face? What've you done wi' yourself?'
âIt's only lipstick, Donald.'
â
Lipstick!
That's for trollops. Trollops 'n tarts.'
Jock stepped forward. âI gave it to her. It was a present. There's nothing wrong in it. The Queen wears lipstick.'
âShut yer mouth! Coming here telling me what's wrong and what's right. I'm not having any woman of mine painting her face like a whoreâ'