Authors: Chris Taylor
The day after he’d met her at the football game, he’d called her and asked her out. She’d lived in Grafton, a couple of hours away, but the distance didn’t deter him. He’d known from the very first instant that she would be his, forever. Besides, he’d turned eighteen and had a license. He’d even saved enough to buy a cheap car. He didn’t care how much the fuel cost or how many miles he drove, he couldn’t get enough of her.
Of course, they were both still in school and in reality, their meetings were mostly confined to the weekends. Even then, those were fitted in around sporting engagements, dance lessons and other things.
They made it even more difficult for themselves by choosing to keep their love a secret. Josie had five very protective older brothers and her father was a District Court judge. Not that Chase let that daunt him, but he agreed with her just the same: It would be easier if they didn’t tell anyone, at least, not until after they’d finished school.
They emailed and texted and spent hours talking on the phone. Chase told his mother he was dating a girl in his class. Josie’s parents thought she was spending time with her girlfriends.
It killed Chase not to take her as his date to his high school graduation, but Josie told him it was for the best. Her father was not at all keen for her to have a boyfriend. She was seventeen, but still very much his little girl. He urged her to concentrate on her studies, finish high school and perhaps after that, when she went to university, she could look at dating.
For twelve more months, they kept their relationship a secret. Chase had been accepted into the Goulburn Police Academy and spent much of his time hours and hours away. Still, his love for Josie didn’t waver and he longed for the day he could tell her family and the world his true feelings. When she asked him to be her date to her high school graduation, he’d been over the moon.
She told him her family had been surprised at her choice, not having even heard of Chase Barrington. They wondered aloud how the two of them had met and were satisfied with vague references to high school. Besides, Chase was on his way to a career in policing, and law enforcement ran thick through Munro veins. By then, all of Josie’s older brothers were serving police officers. Her father had given his tacit nod of approval.
Memories of that magical night swamped him and emotion burned behind his eyes. He’d never seen Josie look more beautiful. When she’d whispered shyly that she wanted him to make love to her, he thought he might combust from the heat of his desire. Until then, their relationship had remained purely platonic. He’d wanted her to be sure and wanted her first time to be special.
And it had been.
It was his first time, too. They’d made love and it had been as beautiful as he’d imagined. Afterwards, he’d kissed her and held her and promised one day he’d make her his. They’d even talked about their children and had gently argued over names. They’d agreed to meet with her parents the next day and confide in them their secret. Chase had been counting the hours.
And then tragedy struck and for him, it was all over. One moment he was head over heels in love and planning a forever future with the girl of his dreams and the next he was flat on his back in a hospital bed, his whole world turned on its head.
Even now, he couldn’t think about it, didn’t want to think about it. Life had knocked him down and he’d dealt with it the best way he could, the
only
way he could. At least, that’s how he’d felt at the time. Now, he wasn’t so sure.
Seeing Josie again had stirred up so many long-buried memories and with them, excruciating guilt. But not only guilt, there was also uncertainty.
Had he made the right decision when he walked away from her all those years ago?
He couldn’t help but wonder what might have happened if he’d told her the truth.
A soft, warm body pressed against him and he blinked to clear his head. A woman in her early twenties smiled at him and flicked back her glossy brown hair. She had a body meant to drive men crazy and her cherry red lips were full and open in invitation.
She put a manicured hand on his arm and leaned in, making sure he noticed her impressive breasts. It was hard not to. They were barely contained in some kind of black, lacy mesh and for an instant, his body stirred.
Once upon a time, not so very long ago, she would have caught his interest. After all, one night stands were his specialty—nothing permanent required. No commitment offered or sought. Just a few moments of reciprocated pleasure before both parties moved on in the morning.
But after seeing Josie again, knowing that she was in town, not even the pretty young starlet who looked like she’d stepped off a Hollywood movie set could tempt him. She pressed against him again and asked him to buy her a drink. Her voice was low and throaty, but he politely shook his head no. Tactfully angling his body away from hers, he finished his drink and set the glass back down on the bar.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured. “I’m flattered, but I’m not the man for you. Trust me.” Ignoring the flash of disappointment in her eyes, he left the bar, cursing himself and Josie Munro every step of the way.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Josie stared at the woman and her son seated across from her. It had been two days since she’d spoken to Chase and then had made the call to Kelly Logan. It was obvious Daniel and his mother weren’t faring well. Josie’s greeting to him a few moments earlier had gone largely ignored and his mother’s response was only slightly better.
Kelly Logan looked like she was in her late thirties. Though her shoulder-length brown hair hung lank around her face, her skin was clear and well maintained. Remnants of nail polish remained on her fingers, evidence of an earlier manicure. Once upon a time, a time before the assault, she’d been a woman who took care of herself. Swallowing a sigh, Josie tried again to establish a connection.
“Mrs Logan, thank you for coming in and for bringing Daniel to see me. I explained a little of the reason for your visit when we spoke on the phone.”
“Yes, you did. Something about the prosecutor wanting a report.”
“That’s right. Daniel’s lawyer has arranged for him to be assessed by a psychologist. It’s normal procedure for the Crown to do the same. The purpose of the report is twofold. The prosecutor has asked me to assess Daniel’s fitness to stand trial. He’s a little concerned your son may still be too traumatized to deal with the reality of a hearing and to provide his lawyer with adequate instructions. The other purpose is to determine whether Daniel knew what he was doing was wrong.”
The woman’s frown was fierce. “Of course he knew it was wrong. Do you think we’ve raised our boys to be lawless animals?”
Josie hurried to explain. “Of course not, Mrs Logan. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to give you that impression. I’m sure Daniel’s a good boy. I’m sure he knows right from wrong. What I’m talking about has to do with how the law perceives these things.
“
Doli incapax
is a term the law uses when dealing with children under the age of fourteen. A child between the ages of ten and fourteen can be charged with a criminal offence, but the burden rests on the prosecution to prove the child knew what he was doing was wrong.”
Kelly Logan opened her mouth again and Josie hurried on. “Not merely in a naughty sense or something for which he might be punished, but wrong in a criminal sense. It’s an important distinction. If the Crown fails to prove Daniel’s
mens rea
—his mindset—in a criminal sense, the case against him will be dismissed and the charges will be dropped.”
Hope flared in the woman’s tortured eyes. “Really? They could drop the whole thing? H-how likely is that to happen?”
Josie swallowed a sigh and answered as honestly as she could. “I don’t know. It depends upon Daniel. I interviewed him the night it happened. He recounted a set of events. Based upon this, he was charged with murder. I don’t know if the interview will be admissible. That’s for the court to decide. It’s my job to dig a little deeper, to find out exactly what he thought at the time of the offense, how he felt, what made him act the way he did. My recommendation to the court will depend upon my findings.”
Daniel’s mother stared at Josie with eyes that had been through more than anyone should have to bear. Quiet tears slid down her cheeks. Josie bit her lip against the surge of emotion that tightened her chest and made breathing difficult.
“I’m so sorry, Mrs Logan,” she whispered. “I don’t know what else to say.”
“Of course you don’t. No one does. Not even me. I close my eyes, I try to sleep, but all I see is
him
. I
hear
him. I
feel
him. I—”
“Mrs Logan,” Josie interrupted and stole a look in Daniel’s direction. She was relieved to find him staring blankly at the wall beside him, his head turned sideways, away from them. He appeared oblivious to his mother’s quiet but furious outburst.
Josie reached across her desk and placed her hand over Kelly’s. “Mrs Logan, you need to seek some professional help. Please tell me you’re seeing someone.”
The woman closed her eyes as if to block out the pain. Her hand fisted under Josie’s. “Th-the nurse at the hospital put me in touch with a counselor. D-Diane something or other. She came to see me while I was there, in the hospital, that first night.”
Josie nodded. “Have you seen her since?”
Kelly shook her head. “No. I-I can’t even think about it, let alone talk about it.”
“I know how you feel, and believe me, it’s perfectly normal, but talking about it will help you heal, it will help you release the burden of anger and guilt. These emotions are perfectly normal, but they will consume you from the inside out if you don’t do anything about this.”
The woman stared up at her with a hard expression. “You know how I feel? How in heavens name would you know? Have you ever been ra—?”
“No, but I’ve been a psychologist for a number of years. I know what I’m talking about. I know the effects of trauma and how to help people deal with them.”
Anger flashed in Kelly’s eyes. She snorted in disgust. “You’ve learned it out of books. That’s what you mean to say. You don’t know what it’s like, how it
feels
. You don’t have a clue. You don’t go to bed too scared to turn out the light, wondering… Knowing it won’t happen again, sure it won’t happen again, but not really believing it.”
Josie blinked back tears. The woman was right. She didn’t know. She couldn’t even imagine how it felt and she prayed she never would. Guilt surged through her at the thought.
“You’re right, Mrs Logan, I don’t know how it feels, but that doesn’t mean that I or some other therapist of your choice can’t help you.”
“And how am I going to pay for it? My husband hasn’t been able to return to work. He thinks if he leaves, something bad is going to happen.” Her voice dropped to a ragged whisper. “He thinks this is his fault.”
Josie drew in a deep breath and let it slide out over her taut lips. Trevor’s reaction was understandable and was a form of survivor’s guilt. It pained her to know that this family who had already suffered so much was now hurting even more.
“I’ll call a friend of mine in Grafton and see what she can do. Her name’s Phoebe Jamison. She’s a therapist working for the base hospital. I’m sure there’ll be some form of counseling you can access free of charge. Daniel, too. Phoebe will know for sure. Anything would be better than nothing.” She paused before adding gently, “In fact, it would be a good idea if all of you attended counseling. Has your husband talked to anyone?”
Kelly shook her head and dropped her gaze to her lap. A moment later, her shoulders shuddered and she gasped on a sob. “He won’t even talk to
me
.” She shook her head back and forth. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to do. I just…don’t know what to do.”
Josie’s gaze shot to Daniel. He’d turned to face his mother, his blank expression replaced with one of torture.
“Please, Mom. Please, don’t cry. Please.” Tears ran silently down the young boy’s cheeks and Josie’s heart clenched in pain. Moisture formed in her eyes, but she steadfastly ignored it. She was breaking every rule by allowing herself to get involved, but she couldn’t help it: She’d been involved from the moment Riley called her in the early hours of the morning to come to the aid of a desperate child. There was no way she could shut off, or turn her back on them now.
It was a long time later when Kelly and her son managed to get their tears back under control. Josie’s composure had been severely tested by the sight, but she had a job to do and she couldn’t let her emotions get in the way.
She offered them a box of tissues and then quietly addressed the boy who sat across from her.
“You heard me talking to your mom about the report I need to do.” He nodded, his eyes red.
“This report is very important. It could mean the difference between you standing trial for shooting that man or going free.” She paused and looked at him, purposefully holding his gaze. “Do you understand what I’m saying, Daniel?”
He eyed her steadily. She was filled with a surge of admiration.
“Yes, I understand.”
Josie swallowed a sigh of relief. “Okay, well, I think we’ve been through enough today. I want you to go home and think about what I’ve said.” Her gaze encompassed both of them. “I’ll see you here again tomorrow.”
Closing the door to her office behind them, Josie leaned against the wooden panel. Her shoulders slumped on a heavy sigh. A moment later, she gave herself a mental shake. She wasn’t the one who had suffered unspeakable violence. She wasn’t the one who needed help. She vowed to do whatever she could to assist the Logan family.