The Demi-Monde: Summer (40 page)

‘I was seen leaving the Hall of Mental Cultivation.’

Xi Kang sat up and rubbed his eyes. ‘Now
that
was careless. Was your face covered?’

‘Yes, but they will know it was a Fresh Bloom who killed Mao and—’

‘Then they’ll execute the lot of you. Wu won’t be taking any chances. By her reckoning, it’ll be better if all two hundred Fresh Blooms are Plucked than one assassin slips through the net.’

‘So what shall I do?’

‘Escape tonight.’

‘Escape? How?’

With a sigh of reluctance Xi Kang swung his legs off his cot. ‘With my help.’

‘You? But you’re just a—’

‘A broken-down old NoN? Is that what you were going to say? Then you should remember, my pretty little assassin, that there was once a time when this broken-down old NoN wasn’t so broken-down and was possessed of a fully functioning dick … and other things.’

He delved under his cot and pulled out a long wooden chest. Wiping off the thick coating of dust, he snapped the locks open and threw back the lid. To Dong E’s amazement, lying inside was a
katana
sword, long, slim, beautiful and deadly. Almost reverently Xi Kang drew the sword free of its straps and then unsheathed it, revealing the one and a half metres of curved and savagely sharp blade. ‘Wonderful,’ he murmured, as he ran a lint cloth along its length, wiping away the thin patina of
choji
oil that had been used to protect the blade. ‘Made by Muramasa from the very finest jewelled steel. I call it “Soul Stealer”.’

‘What are you doing with it?’ Dong E asked. ‘Did you steal it?’ She could see from the fine silver work on the hilt and on the scabbard and from the perfection of the blade that the
sword was no run-of-the-mill weapon. This was the type of sword only wielded by one of the nobility … by a samurai. It most certainly was not a weapon used by a nothing of a NoN.

‘It was given to me by the Emperor.’

‘The Emperor?’

Xi Kang ignored the scorn flavouring Dong E’s question. ‘Yes, His Imperial Majesty Qin Shi Huang, Light of the Kosmos and Ruler of the Demi-Monde, presented it to me to commemorate twenty years of faithful service. Undeserved, of course: it was my lack of insight that failed to identify the auguries indicating that that mad cow Wu was preparing to strike, but perhaps it was part of ABBA’s plan that I spent that year not only chasing the dragon but catching it.’

‘Hah, a likely story! Such a sword would only have been given to one high in the Emperor’s esteem.’

‘But I was! Xi Kang is my NoN name. Before I was gelded I was Prime Minister Wen Tiangiang, Administrator of All the Coven.’

‘You’re Wen Tiangiang? But you’re dead!’

A chuckle. ‘Only partially. By rights my life should have been taken from me when those lunatic HerEticals murdered the Emperor, but they were so frightened of offending my ancestors – many of whom I have in common with Wu – that they spared me. Instead they took away my cock and tried to take away my sword, but there were those in the Forbidding City who took pity on me and hid it … the sword, that is, not my cock. I suppose they reckoned that for a man to lose his penis was punishment enough without him being deprived of
both
his weapons. Old friends from before the Revolution returned Soul Stealer to me three years ago.’ He winked at Dong E. ‘As the Empress has discovered, there are those within the Coven who are not quite as loyal and dutiful as she likes to imagine.’

‘But why would they give you back your sword?’

A derisive laugh from Xi Kang. ‘Because it was judged that I had a use for it … that I had something worth fighting for.’ He tied a sash about his waist and threaded the scabbard through it. ‘That’s better: I almost feel whole again.’ He turned to Dong E and smiled. ‘So, will you show me the way to the Pavilion of Silent Repose? It’s been many years since I wandered the corridors of the Forbidding City and my memory isn’t quite what it was.’

A frown from Dong E. ‘Why there? Surely it’s better to try to escape through the Meridian Gate?’

‘Presently. First we must rescue this Daemon of yours.’

There were a thousand and one questions buzzing around in Dong E’s head as she and Xi Kang scooted through the dark, deserted corridors of the Forbidding City, the most pressing of which was how a disreputable old NoN – armed though he was – expected to deal with the two formidably big and formidably powerful guards who stood between them and the Daemon.

The answer in the end was ‘easily’.

Dong E had seen the guards practising with their bamboo staves in the Courtyard of Final Fulfilment and had always thought them incredibly skilled and incredibly fast swordsFemmes, but she had been wrong. Compared with the speed and dexterity with which Xi Kang wielded Soul Stealer, they were mere amateurs. Admittedly, the NoN had surprise on his side and certainly at three o’clock in the morning the guards
were not at their most alert, but that took nothing away from the savage efficiency with which he dispatched them. The first guard hadn’t even time to unsheathe her sword before her head had been removed from her shoulders and the second quickly learnt that firing a rifle when one of your arms had just been chopped off at the elbow was extraordinarily difficult. Fortunately, it was a problem the Femme only had to wrestle with for the second it took for Xi Kang to plunge his sword through her chest.

‘I’m fucking impressed with myself,’ admitted Xi as he wiped the smear of SAE from the blade of his sword. ‘You’d have thought that the best part of ten years spent lying on a cot, trying to remember what a good wank felt like, would have slowed my reflexes down a tad. But not a bit of it. Remarkable.’

And it
was
remarkable, judged Dong E as she stepped over the decapitated body of the larger of the two guards; Xi had fought like a true warrior. Perhaps his story about having once been the famous Prime Minister and warrior Wen Tiangiang wasn’t as fanciful as she had imagined. Pushing her way into Norma’s apartment, she felt herself quite lost in admiration of the old man’s ability in matters martial.

They found Norma lying on a futon in the furthest corner of the room, sound asleep and blissfully unaware of the carnage that had just taken place outside her door. ‘Norma,’ Dong E whispered as she nudged the sleeping girl with the toe of her slipper, ‘wake up. We have come to rescue you.’

‘What?’

‘We have come to rescue you. I have taken the files relating to Project YiYi from the Hall of Mental Cultivation. Unfortunately, to do this I was required to assassinate Imperial Secretary Mao ZeDong and now we must escape the Forbidding City before his body is discovered. PhilosopherNoN Xi Kang has offered to guide us to safety.’

Norma blinked the sleep out of her eyes and studied the NoN carefully. She didn’t seem terribly impressed. ‘So you’re the cavalry, eh? I bet Empress Wu is shitting herself.’

Xi Kang laughed uproariously. ‘I like you, Daemon, there is definitely something of the TooZian about you. And as for the Empress soiling her kimono, you should know that once just the mention of my name meant it was smelly-knickers time … and perhaps it will be so again.’ With that he waved a hand to indicate the two bodies lying in her doorway.

They made a convincing statement of intent, and without another word Norma rose to her feet and hauled on her
jiangs
and her slippers. Then, with Xi Kang leading the way, the three of them headed towards the Meridian Gate and the Bridge of the Heavenly Divide. It was a tense journey and twice they nearly bumped into ServantNoNs going about their early morning business. But with luck and – so Dong E liked to think – the guidance of ABBA they came to the Meridian Gate unchallenged. With a determined nod, Xi Kang ushered his two charges into what looked like a stable block built next to the Gate’s right-hand tower.

‘Feng Menlong,’ he whispered as he pushed open the door and stepped into the darkness, ‘how can you sleep when your Master comes calling? Are you so absorbed in writing those sickly-sweet odes to unrequited love that you have forgotten your Oath of Imperial Fealty?’ He laughed. ‘And love doesn’t come any more unrequited than when it’s written by a penisless poet. For a dickless nonentity like you to be writing about jade stalks entering precious gateways is akin to an armless man having ambitions to be a juggler.’

‘Nonentity?’ came a protest from the darkness. ‘Who is the piece of dogshit having the audacity to accuse the genius who wrote the
Qing Shi
of being a nonentity?’ Out of the shadows came an old bow-legged man whose eyes were dull with sleep
and Solution. They didn’t remain dull for long: seeing Xi Kang, he dropped to his knees and knocked his forehead down onto the tiles of the stable floor nine times. ‘Prime Minister, forgive me but … but … I heard you had journeyed to meet your ancestors.’

So Xi Kang
had
been the Prime Minister!

‘I am alive, Servant Feng, and in need of your help.’

‘Anything, Prime Minister, but … but …’

‘There is no time for explanations. Where is the Imperial palanquin?’

‘In the room to the back of the stables, Prime Minister, sir.’

‘Are there three others ready to die in the service of the true Empress?’

The true Empress?

Feng raised his lantern and studied Dong E. ‘Is this … is this …?’

‘Yes, this is Dong E, the forgotten daughter of Emperor Qin Shi Huang.’

It took a moment for Dong E to connect with what was being said. ‘I don’t understand,’ she spluttered. ‘All of the Emperor’s children were assassinated during the fight for the Forbidding City ten years ago.’

‘All the
legitimate
children,’ corrected Xi Kang. ‘The Emperor was a virile man who was inclined to fuck any Femme possessed of a beating body clock. Understandably, his Empress refused to have his by-blows in the Forbidding City, so as soon as you were born I had you adopted. When Wu took control of the Coven, she felt it safer to keep the Emperor’s bastard progeny – that’s you – under her control and had you brought here. Of course, that she could humiliate the shade of the Emperor by making his daughter serve her as a concubine was also a motivation in having you ordained as a Fresh Bloom. Wu is nothing if not spiteful.’

Dong E felt her legs go weak and had to lean against a wall to prevent herself collapsing. ‘I’m the Emperor’s daughter?’ she gasped.

‘The Emperor’s
bastard
daughter, if you wish to be exact.’ Xi Kang stopped for a moment and then corrected himself. ‘No, that’s not right: as you’re a bastard who’s the
only
surviving child of Emperor Qin Shi Huang, I suppose that makes you legitimate.’ He caught sight of Feng who was now kneeling on the straw- and shit-strewn floor of the stable kowtowing to Dong E. ‘Oh, do get up. We haven’t time for all that nonsense. We need three more bearers.’

‘Of course, Prime Minister: there’s An Ling … there’s …’

‘Bring them here, but do it quickly and quietly.’

As the old man waddled away, Dong E came to stand square in front of Xi Kang. ‘This is all nonsense, isn’t it … me being the Emperor’s daughter?’

‘No, it’s a fact, Your Majesty. I had thought you dead until you came tripping into the Gallery of Literary Profundity four years ago. I recognised you instantly from the birthmark on your hand – all of the Pings had it – though I have to admit, you’ve filled out wonderfully. I thought about telling you then, but if Mao had ever suspected you knew what your birthright was then you’d have been dead within the hour.’

Their conversation was interrupted by Feng Menlong barging his way back into the room, followed by three decidedly ancient-looking companions. On seeing Dong E these newcomers dropped to their knees.

‘Rise, rise,’ commanded an exasperated Xi Kang. ‘Hurry. Break out the palanquin. The True Empress Dong E and her friend will ride in it and we will pretend that it carries the Empress Wu.’ Before Dong E could object or ask any questions, she and Norma had been bundled into the litter, the screens pulled down over the windows and the palanquin lifted onto the
shoulders of the NoNs. At a command from Xi Kang they exited the stable coming to a halt before the Meridian Gate.

Peeking out from behind the screen, Dong E saw Xi Kang demand – demand! – that the gates be opened so that the Empress Wu might journey across the Bridge of the Heavenly Divide to Beijing. Perhaps Xi Kang overplayed his hand; perhaps the Captain of the Gate wasn’t used to being given orders by someone who wasn’t wearing the usual uniform of an AdministratorNoN; or perhaps it was the absence of an appropriately stamped pass. Whatever the reason, the CaptainFemme was suspicious. But Xi Kang blustered and threatened until finally the CaptainFemme – knowing the fate of any who delayed Her Imperial Majesty – reluctantly agreed to open the gates.

The journey across the Bridge of the Heavenly Divide was slow and harrowing. The four NoNs carrying the palanquin were old and enfeebled and, despite the crude entreaties of Xi Kang, could only manage a slow, lurching progress. That the Bridge was so narrow didn’t help either, they kept bashing the palanquin against the rails, threatening to send it – and its two passengers – tumbling into the moat below.

They were only halfway across when a difficult situation became distinctly dangerous. ‘There are guards coming after us,’ Dong E heard Xi Kang call. ‘That bastard of a Captain must have checked whether the Empress was still in her apartment.’

There was no use for subterfuge now. She raised the shutter from the window and peered back towards the Forbidding City and what she saw sent chills trickling down her spine. A detachment of twenty or so guardFemmes were racing after them and the speed with which they were closing meant that they would be on them before the palanquin had reached the safety of Beijing.