The Desire to Touch (8 page)

With my hip propping the door open ajar I turn to him, “Thank you for everything.” I fumble with my purse – awkward moment - just go in, turn around and go in.

Trey takes my hand, “Why does this feel like goodbye? I don’t think I want it to be.”

I sigh, “I guess it is goodbye, you’re from a whole different world to me. Once you leave tomorrow you’ll forget me, the next time I see you will be on the TV or in a magazine. Like I said it’s a story to remember.”

“But I
don’t
want to say goodbye yet.”

Its true and it hurts but the reality is I am Jane Doe; I am no one in comparison. Even without the duo giving me a split argument as to why I should - this could never work, why at a time like this am I being left to make my own choice? For a year now I’ve had these two to help me over think things where are they now?

“I really don’t want to say goodbye, not yet.”

He clasps my chin between his thumb and forefinger and tilts my head back so our eyes once again meet.

“There’s something about you, I know you’re right but still,” his eyes are begging mine.

“Why start something we can’t finish?”

He releases my chin and runs both his hands through his hair and grabs the back of his neck, I stand up onto tiptoe and lay a soft kiss on his cheek. Trey takes a sharp inhale of breath as if I’ve just given him an electric shock, “Thank you again for saving me and walking me to my room.”

He looks at me dumbstruck then with a whisper says, “It was,” he clears his throat, “It was my pleasure.”

I really have to walk away now or this is going to string out into some sort of awkward moment, more awkward than it already is. He takes my right hand, making me flinch but I let him hold it, he looks at our hands as if he’s contemplating not letting them go, “Good night Ellie.”

He kisses the back of my hand and turns to
walk away.

“Goodnight Trey.”

I turn into my door, slowly close it behind me and press my forehead onto the door. The first genuinely kind person that has made me feel safe in ages and I have just sent him packing. I didn’t even kiss him properly. I turn and lean my back against the door and hold my head in my hands, the duo have appeared and they are both moaning ‘
she could’ve at least kissed him
’.

I lift my head and start to walk away when there
is a light tapping at the door. Without double guessing what to do I spin around and open the door. Standing with an arm either side of the doorframe is Trey, just stood there with his head hanging down. Oh no what’s wrong? Is this where they all jump out, all the actors and all the cameras? You’ve been royally screwed over or whatever reality program it is. Trey looks up and before I can speak, his hands are either side of my face, pulling me into him and his lips are on mine. He’s kissing me, what the hell!

I slowly close my eyes and succumb to him, his lips are so soft against mine and his tongue is in my mouth searching for mine, they meet and they entwine and the feeling when they clash sends explosions throughout my body. His hands are caressing my head and his fingers grasp at my hair pulling me further into him.

My body is turning to jelly, I am utterly lost in the moment and every inch of my body becomes hot as our bodies move and our tongues desperately caress each other. I lift my hands to his chest and lay them gently in place and his breathing becomes deeper and more erratic. Slowly Trey releases my head and our lips part, my eyes are still closed and my mouth still open, my chest is heaving as I fight to catch my breath. He leans his forehead onto mine, I close my mouth and now I can taste him it’s an amazing mix of beer and burger sauce. I love it.

“Wow!” That’s all I can muster.

“You stole my line again,” Trey laughs, he too, is struggling to calm himself and catch his breath.

I laugh and open my eyes to see him looking into mine
, almost searching the depths of my soul.

“That was unexpected.”

“Well, at least now our story can end like this,” he smiles, “the hero got to kiss the damsel in the end.”

I feel the heat of embarrassment washing over me.

“Don’t take this the wrong way but well I hope I get to rescue you again one day.”

“I hope so too,” I whisper.

“Goodnight Ellie, I am really pleased to have met you.”

He leans in and plants a tender kiss on my lips, it feels like its left a burning imprint; I reach up and stroke the spot where he kissed with my finger.

“Night,” I smile with an ear to ear jaw-deadening grin as he walks away. I once again turn in and close the door behind me. The smile is beginning to hurt my face, I can feel the pain coming from my jaw muscles.

“Was that who I think it was?” Meagan comes running out of the spare room into the living room to see me standing with my back to the door. I smile at her, I can’t hide
it - I am so happy she takes my smile as a ‘yes, you’re right’ and she screams.

“Ellie! Oh my – What happened? I’ve been waiting up for you, five minutes you said.”

“Well you seem to have sobered up, come to my room and I’ll explain everything while I get changed.”

We walk through to my room, which is off the lounge, I start taking my makeup off and explain to Meagan everything that went on. Meagan follows from bedroom to bathro
om so she doesn’t miss a detail. She stands with me while I pee, her mouth open in shock from the story I am reliving for her. I wash my hands and brush my teeth and she’s in the mirror with me every step. We walk back into my bedroom and she climbs into my bed with me, Meagan lays her head on the pillow and listens intently as I continue with my story. I feel as if I am telling a small child a fairytale and I have their undivided attention. For as long as I can remember this is the longest amount of time Meagan has stayed quiet and just listened.

Meagan yawns and turns to me, “I am so sorry
, I should never have given your number to Guy.”

“Well
, if you hadn’t this evening could have turned out very differently indeed.”

“I’ve missed you.”

I laugh, “I was only gone a couple of hours.”

“No, this you – the old you.
I knew she was still in there somewhere. I haven’t seen you this happy since your 21st.”

“Go to sleep you’re delirious.”

“Just,” Meagan yawns again, “Just you wait till I tell all my friends you kissed Trey Thomas, they’ll all be so jealous.”

With that Meagan turns over and is snoring within seconds. I, on the other hand, am buzzing from all the action of tonight, this grin is starting to really hurt
. I must look like the joker. The events flash back through my mind as I lay and stare at the ceiling, eventually I turn on my side and close my eyes to dream it in full for the hundredth time and slowly I begin to drift off.

I awake with a start to screams and giggles, the sun is bright and some idiot has opened the curtains. Still not even a cup of water in the face could ruin my mood today. The shrieks sound again.

“What the hell is that?” I groan
, burying my face under my pillow.

Slowly I drag myself out of bed and walk through the living room to the kitchen, still wiping my eyes whilst modeling my pink pyjama trousers, vest top and seriously knotty bed hair.

I walk into the kitchen and head straight for the coffee machine. Leaning on the counter I yawn and attempt to run my fingers through the mass of knots my hair has become. Damn it, I knew I should have brushed it out last night before falling asleep.

“Here she is,” Meagan calls sarcastically from the table behind me.

I turn to look at her and Lacey, who in turn are staring at me all wide eyed with anticipation, just waiting for me to say something.

“Morning,” I mutter and turn stra
ight back to the coffee machine. I pour myself a fresh cup and the smell is divine, I take a few scorching sips and it wakes me instantly.

“Morning back at you! So Jones, I hear
we
missed a lot last night.” Lacey’s voice is shaky.

I turn to look at her, “Ouch
, you sound rough, mind you after the way you were last night – to be expected!”

“Shut it Jones,” she grabs her head in pain. “So, are we going to be your entourage? I can see myself in some of the magazines wearing next season’s fashion. Oh no, the next big thing as seen on Miss Lacey Miller whilst shopping on sunset boulevard.”

Meagan squeals with excitement and Lacey grabs her head again, I nearly spill my coffee as I sit at the table.

“Wait
, I can see it now, the celebrity wedding and we’re the bridesmaids, front cover and ten page spread!”

Meagan claps her hands together, talk about running away with themselves, we kissed once, once!

I fold my arms and just sit back and phase out as they giggle with over-excitement about things that are never ever going to happen.

“Look,” I interrupt and grab a slice of toast from the table, “Meagan I told you last night it was a one night thing, he’s a bloody film star
. It’s not like we’ll ever meet again.”

I smile inwar
dly as I start to nibble on the cold toast, I glance at the door and smile again as I remember little snippets of the evening before.

“I
cannot believe you kissed Trey Thomas, like seriously
you
kissed Trey Thomas.”

“Well
, actually he kissed me.”

Yeah that’s right Meagan
, he kissed me, my smile grows again.

“You are one lucky bitch,” Lacey groans with the hint of a smile.

“Well it all just feels like an amazing dream to me so let’s leave it that way. Right, what are you lot doing with your Sunday?”

“I’ve got some work due in tomorrow, so looks like I’ll be pulling an all-nighter,” Lacey frowns.

“Well, I am off with mom to go see George, he’s being discharged from hospital next week. Hey, come with us if you want, George would love to see you.”

George is Meagan’s
uncle and he was injured in action three months ago but he’s recovered now, thankfully he wasn’t hurt too bad, just a few broken bones.

“That’s great that he’s being discharged, give him a hug and a kiss from me. I arranged days ago to go shopping and to a suit fitting with Lucas, for some reason he will not go alone to see this bloke.”

I look at the time and its 11:30am, “Shit, I’m being picked up at midday, I’ll have to see you both later.” I jump up from my chair and grab another piece of toast, waving to the girls, I make my way to my room.

After a quick shower I have just enough time to sling on my ‘’boyfriend jeans and an old faithful white off the shoulder jumper with miniature birds printed on it. I don’t do fashion I do comfort, so I put on my timberlands and tie them up then rifle through my drawer for a white bangle to match the jumper. I look at the clock and its 11:50am, I don’t have time to sort my hair into anything other then a high ponytail, it’s just too wet and too long for me to make extra effort. Right slap on some mascara and brush the fringe…I may look ten years younger than my age but fifteen was a good age, so it suits me for today. I grab my cardigan and bag and run out the door.

I reach the lobby and I can see Lucas waiting outside in his old rusted, white convertible Hummer that looks like it went on tour with George - every time I get in his car I can’t help but say a little prayer behind closed eyes, that we’ll make it to our destination.

“You’re late Doll,” Lucas shouts, as I throw my bag in the back and climb in.

“Sorry, was a late one last night,” Earlier I had made a conscious decision not to fill him in on the details, as Lucas will only pull the surrogate big brother routine.

My door is barely shut and we’re off, his foot is to the floor. ‘No win, No fee’ is all I can think - that and thank goodness I tied my hair up.

After four hours of shopping and looking at shows around Time Square
, we make it just in time for Lucas’s suit fitting at ‘Lorenzo’s’.

We pull up outside
the shop, which is situated in the Meat packing district, it’s a door sandwiched between a rentals store and an art studio of some kind. The front door looks like it’s in desperate need of a lick of paint and, as I look up, I see a huge neon sign saying ‘Lorenzo’s’ with a hand and needle moving to look like its sewing.

“Classy,” I whisper
, more to myself than for anyone to hear.

“It’s nicer once you’re through the door.”

“I’m sure it is,” I mutter, “You do know the murderer is always out when they knock at doors like this on movies, then you go inside and find the decapitated bodies of loved ones all over the place.”

“Well
, you’re in a fine mood!”

“I’m sorry but I still can’t believe that after four hours of shopping all you bought is a shirt, a tie and got three, no four telephone numbers. Also
, let’s not forget the shag in the changing room.”

“Who says I got a shag?”