The Diaries of Sofia Tolstoy (75 page)

 

7th
. Today is the anniversary of Lev Nikolaevich's death—seven years have passed and I am still alive! I visited the grave. There were only four visitors—two peasant intellectuals from a distant district and two Tula men.

 

16th
. My sister and I had the idea of reading something to the village boys, but it's hard to know what. Our peasants came here this evening and held elections to the Committee. None of this is very clear to me. They started talking about an armistice, then read my story about Vanechka.*

 

23rd
. This evening I was notified on the telephone by the chief forester that we will be receiving our food from the Rationing Committee. I read Bulgakov's
Ethics
.

 

1st December
. Butovich came to visit and I showed him round Lev Nik.'s rooms; he is very interested in all forms of visual art.

 

4th
. I am living in a dream and a state of terrible turmoil. Crowds of idle people mill around all day—apart from Tanya and me, of course,
who are immersed in worries, mainly about food. The presence of all these useless people prevents me from applying myself to anything. My daughter Sasha has arrived at last with Varvara Mikhailovna. I am so pleased to see them, despite all the difficulties we have had in the past—although even then there was a lot of closeness between us. Sasha and my sister sang beautifully this evening.

 

18th
. Time flies, the war continues, famine looms. Sergeenko helps us to get the things we need—rye, macaroni, beans and rice.*

 

19th
. Endless noise and turmoil…I'm happy to have my two daughters and my granddaughter here—my life depends on it. My heart aches for my absent sons.

 

26th
. Tanya finished reading
Eugene Onegin
today. What a marvellous speech that is of Tatyana's rebuking Onegin! I hadn't read the work for a long time—one should always reread old things.

 

27th
. I sewed handkerchiefs, glued some little boxes and played patience. I yearn for my darling Andryusha and absent Lyova.

 

28th
. Yet more visitors to Lev Nik.'s rooms—the officer of a sappers' regiment called Avenarius, with his comrade and a pretty young girl. There were more soldiers here too—ours—with a guest of theirs.

 

31st
. The last day of a difficult year. This evening Tanya read us ‘What People Live for'. We didn't see in the New Year, but everyone had dinner with us—12 in all. When I was alone in my room my heart ached for my sons. Where are Lyova and Ilya? Are Seryozha and Misha still alive? What of their families? What of Dora and her eight children? My soul grieves for them all.

February—first allied landings in North Russia. Germany resumes invasion. 3rd March—the Bolsheviks finally agree to sign Brest Litovsk peace treaty with Germany, which grants their aggressor a large percentage of Russia's industrial centres and farming land. May—Civil War begins in earnest, when Czech prisoners of war, backed by France and Britain, rise up against the Bolshevik government. This signals a wave of revolts, financed by Britain, France, America and Japan, and led by former tsarist generals and admirals known as White Guards. Anticipating an invasion of Moscow, the Bolsheviks move the capital to Petrograd. Summer—Bolsheviks' fortunes at their lowest ebb. July—Tsar Nicholas II killed by the Bolsheviks. 11th November—war ends
.

April—official opening of Yasnaya Polyana Society in Tula, which takes control of the estate. Tanya Sukhotina becomes caretaker of the Yasnaya Polyana Museum. Food is in short supply and life is hard. Tanya knits scarves to sell in the market to support her mother, sister and daughter. May—Bolshevik commissars visit Yasnaya Polyana. November—Tanya Sukhotina replaces secretary of Yasnaya Polyana Society and takes control of the house. Lev Tolstoy leaves Russia with his wife and children to live in Sweden
.

 

1st January
. This evening we lit the candles on the Christmas tree and invited 20 children in and gave them all something. After the Christmas tree we had a “democratic ball”, and everyone danced—soldiers and prisoners, our servants and maids and the two Tanyas.

 

4th
. Sergeenko went to Tula for kerosene—we sit here with one lamp and a wax candle. For 4 gallons of bad kerosene we now pay 60 rubles.

 

5th
. During the recent storm the roof was damaged and L.N.'s room was flooded with melting snow.

 

7th
. We were shocked to hear that the Constituent Assembly has been dissolved, and Shingarev and Kokoshkin have been murdered by two sailors.* Some peasants came to visit, and Sergeenko and my daughter Tanya talked to them.

 

14th
. I am handing over the management of Yasnaya Polyana to my daughter Tanya, and shall hire a steward. I miss my sons terribly, especially Lyova and Andryusha. Is Lyova still alive, I wonder?!

 

18th
. I spoke on the telephone to the manager of a sugar factory, who is giving us ten pounds. Then I asked Volkov for some iron from the
zemstvo
to mend the roofs, and they agreed to give me seven sheets but refused any more.

 

21st
. Vysokomirny came and introduced some discipline amongst the soldiers;* he is a most agreeable man, also a soldier at present.

 

23rd
. Tanya went to Kolpna for a committee meeting. They are taking our forest from us.

 

26th
. Alarming rumours of a pogrom by the young villagers. Distressing discussions with Tanya about Sergeenko, who has returned from Tula infected with delusions of power and keeps meddling with her instructions. Her unkind attitude to me almost made me weep.

 

15th February
. News that the Germans have seized St Petersburg,* the situation in Russia is desperate. My daughters and I sorted through various manuscripts and documents concerning Lev Nik—ch.

 

17th
. It's a sad life. We are seeing Sasha off to Moscow again, it's particularly hard to part with her this time. I found her a little food to take as she will be arriving at night.

 

8th March
. They have refused me a pension, and have promised me 300 rubles instead of 800.*

 

21st
. I went with Manya to three consumers' co-operatives and two shops, where I found some bad brown macaroni, stale Greek nuts, matches and chicory coffee.

 

30th
. An unexpected joy—my son Misha spoke to me on the telephone and promised to visit tomorrow. I worked hard on
My Life
.

 

31st
. This morning I worked on my memoirs and read the papers. Misha arrived; he is much changed, but he's a splendid fellow—energetic, intelligent and agreeable.

 

1st April
. I spent the day with my beloved Misha, who has now left for Tula. He is cheerful and energetic. Lord help him!

 

7th
. Two agronomists called Volkov and Bogoyavlensky arrived from Tula today to discuss Yasnaya Polyana. They want to repair the garden and set it to rights. The spring brings me little joy; I suffer too much from thoughts of those going hungry in Russia and in our house.

 

15th
. Some of our young peasants came here this evening, saying they wanted to expropriate our land.*

 

24th
. I copied Tanya's letters. Then the whole village arrived and invited me to accompany them to Lev Nik.'s grave. Naturally I went—relations with them are good. Everyone knelt and sang ‘Eternal Memory' three times.*

 

9th May
. The religious holiday of Nicholas the Miracle-Worker, which the peasants celebrated in their usual coarse fashion. I had my photograph taken with several visitors—teachers from the railway.

 

13th
. I had a visit from the Tula land committee, all from the common people but not disagreeable.

 

22nd July
. Some commissars and various other gentlemen arrived from Tula—twenty in all—and looked at Lev Nik.'s rooms.

 

30th
. I wandered around the estate all day, my heart heavy with the woes of Russia. An architect-academician came with plans for building a school.

 

9th August
. My son Seryozha came—I was intensely glad to see him. “My dearest eldest children,” as Lev Nik. said to Seryozha and Tanya just before his death. This evening Seryozha played the piano and little Tanya beat the drum in time with him. My 55-year-old Seryozha has grown very thin, and this is sad for his mother.

 

28th
. My son Misha arrived this morning, with Sergeenko. I am oppressed by the worry of finding food for everyone—there were twelve of us here for dinner today. Some of our peasants came and
invited me to accompany them to the grave again, and we all went and sang ‘Eternal Memory' three times.

 

3rd September
. I wrote a new will to include Sasha: she had been cut out for her outrageous behaviour to me after her father's death, but now I have forgiven her.*

 

13th
. Some technicians arrived late this evening to draw up an estimate and a plan for a water pipe.

 

8th November
. Everyone returned from Tula, where they had attended an evening commemorating Lev Nik.'s death. I did a lot of copying, and read a biography of N.A. Nekrasov. What a terrible childhood, and what a monster of a father! And his poor beloved mother!

 

3rd December
. I am mourning the death of my brother Sasha. He had been in poor health for some time.

 

10th
. Sergeenko came and brought an architect to design a model school for the peasants. Nothing will come of it; it's an enormous enterprise.

 

11th
. This evening Sergeenko read us some Ovid and Socrates from the
Circle of Reading
.

 

21st
. My daughter Sasha arrived late this evening with Zosya Stakhovich and my grandson Ilyushok. They are all hungry, but Sasha laughs about everything.

 

31st
. Tanya arranged a surprise New Year's party at my grandson Ilyusha's request. We were all delighted and went to her wing, where we happily saw in the New Year together.

July–August—the Crimea falls to the Whites. September—the Ukraine evacuated as the Whites invade, then the Bolsheviks' fortunes improve. October—Yudenich's White Army beaten back from Petrograd. November—Denikin's White Army in headlong retreat. December—Bolshevik government introduces “militarization of labour”
.

March—at the request of Sofia Tolstoy and her daughter Tanya, the Yasnaya Polyana Society takes over their portion of the land and uses it as farm. July—Sofia writes a farewell note and distributes her valuables among her loved ones. September—Red Guards quartered in the village of Yasnaya Polyana. October—guards moved to a nearby village after protests from Yasnaya Polyana Society. 1st, 2nd, 3rd November—Sofia Tolstoy catches a chill. 4th November—she dies of pneumonia. Buried beside her daughter Masha in Kochaki cemetery. Shortly afterwards her son Misha emigrates to France
.

 

2nd January
. We read
Dead Souls
this evening. I dislike these false-comic characters and situations, but there are some lovely lyrical passages and descriptions of nature. I haven't read it for a long time.

 

21st
. Sergeenko sneaked in and choked me with talk for an hour and a half. What a tiresome man. He said some people have arrived from some sort of committee for the defence of the children of Krapivna, and want to evict everyone but me from the two houses, to build a home for twelve orphans, and I would be given two rooms to live in. I don't believe a word of it, but one feels constantly alarmed.*

 

26th
. I wrote letters, and made copies, to the sales department of Kushneryov and Co., asking them to give me back my book
L.N. Tolstoy's Letters to His Wife
.*

 

9th February
. My sister and I sat together at the large round table in the drawing room, and recalled all the people who had sat at that table in the past. We never thought then that most of them would leave, and it breaks my heart to think that those who are still alive are cold, hungry and at war.

 

18th
. I signed a document handing over the Yasnaya Polyana estate to Kolya Obolensky, my late Masha's husband.

 

24th
. Kolya Obolensky and Sergeenko gave me to understand in a brief conversation that there were disagreements within the Tolstoy Society. As far as I can understand, they want to raise a large loan on the Yasnaya Polyana estate—but who will pay for it no one knows. There is no landlord, no bailiff and no workers.*

 

28th
. My daughter Tanya has gone to Tula for a meeting of the Tolstoy Society this evening. Kolya Obolensky went too.

 

3rd March
. Five Bolsheviks came here with the lawyer Goldenblatt, and for some reason they brought us some white flour, cheese, coffee and tea.

 

8th
. I have recently had a sense of Lev Nik.'s presence, and that he was being quietly affectionate and tender to me. Where is he now? And where are all those I loved who have left? How much longer will I languish on this earth? It is all in God's hands!

 

8th May
. I was visited this evening by two engineers who are building a road to Yasnaya Polyana, and I chatted to one of them who had known Andryusha as a child. His name is Kalita.

 

25th
. A vast number of people came to look round Lev Nik.'s rooms—children, high-school boys, young girls, members of some tribunal.

 

30th
. A mass of visitors this morning. Some young girls sang in a choir and went for a walk, then ate their own lunch in the village—bread, eggs and milk. After we had our dinner they sang again and drank tea with us; then my sister Tanya sang beautifully—first with a small choir, with my little granddaughter Tanechka joining in, then on her own. Everyone was enchanted by her voice. There were more than 200 people here.

 

8th June
. Whit Sunday! Beautiful weather, the lilacs and lilies of the valley are flowering profusely. There are grass snakes and patches of dry moss on the apple trees. Sasha and my granddaughter Annochka
arrived from the station, and everyone was delighted to see them. Lots of singing and dancing.

 

9th
. Delightful weather, magnificent lilacs, nightingales, a mass of lilies of the valley. We have everything here, and my beloved eldest children, yet a terrible sadness gnaws at my heart. I have so little love for people, I only love my
own
children and my little Tanechka. Annochka, another granddaughter, has come, and I am happy to see her.

 

21st
. Sasha came this morning, with a pedagogue called Maxin, with whom Tanya had a long talk. We all walked to the Voronka river past the grave, and it was sad to see the old forest devastated by felling.

 

22nd
. We had a great many visitors today and I am exhausted. Another meeting of the Tolstoy Society—all words and no action. More visitors this evening from the Rationing Committee. One of them was nothing but a dreamer.

 

14th July
. Rumours that the White General Denikin is marching on Tula with his troops. Unrest in Tula; people have been marching with white flags and putting them up over the post office building. What will come of it? I wrote a letter to be opened after my death, bidding farewell to my family and begging forgiveness from those I am abandoning.* My grandson Ilya came, and various gentlemen from Tula with splendid horses and carriages to inspect the site for a school.

 

15th
. I felt so unwell these past few days that I thought my death was near. So I summoned my two darling Tanyas, who have been living with me, and the three of us went through my few valuable possessions together. I considered it only fair to give my best things to my daughter and granddaughter. They have lived with me through the most difficult time in my life and have always been such a comfort to me. To my granddaughter I gave my gold watch and chain which Lev Nik. gave me, and a large diamond brooch that was a present from him when we were engaged; to my daughter I gave my mother's bracelet (gold) and a ring with two diamonds and a ruby, a present from Lev Nik. for all my help and labours when he was writing
Anna Karenina
. (This ring was in fact called
Anna Karenina
.)

 

19th
. Rumours that Denikin is marching here with his troops to fight the “Bolsheviks”, but whether he will be any better God knows! The Bolsheviks give us everything we need and don't insult us. Sergeenko read to us this evening from his
Tolstoy Almanac
. It was very interesting; I have forgotten so much, and it's good to be reminded of it.

 

20th
. I gave Tanya the will I made in her favour. A worrying letter from my son Seryozha. Where are my sons and their families!!! My soul is heavy.

 

14th August
. Rumours that the Bolsheviks' power is collapsing. Everyone here is rejoicing, but I am grateful to them for their help.

 

1st September
. More rumours that some Red Guards are being stationed in our village to fight Denikin.*

 

5th
. Alarming news this evening that soldiers have been quartered in the peasants' huts with their regimental commander, and that some soldiers have been dispatched from Tula to guard our apple orchard.

 

6th
. They have sent us a large number of soldiers. Some are being lodged in the village to do various jobs of work, and some are guarding the orchard. How terrible to think armed people are living on the land where Tolstoy was born!

 

12th
. Sergeant Dehring came with some aeronautical artillerymen—in a motor car.

 

29th
. After lunch I visited the grave and met one or two people on the way. I sat by the grave for a long time, then wandered about talking silently to my dead Lyovochka—as he was when we loved each other.

 

7th October
. Something sinister and terrible is approaching. A lot of bulls and horses and 4 vans have been driven here from Kursk. Kursk has been routed, and the Jews there were slaughtered.* An agitated Volkov from the Yasnaya Polyana Society dashed in briefly to visit us this evening. He is responsible for sorting out the cattle that were driven over here (for some reason) from Kursk. I have had a bad cough and have been staying at home. I wrote a letter to Davydov in reply
to his about ‘Polikushka'.* I washed the floors and took the window frames out to the veranda. Rumours that Denikin is in Mtsensk, or very near it.

 

9th
. A great quantity and variety of strangers here to visit Lev Nik—ch's rooms. A certain Levitsky told me some Red Army troops had marched to Tula in the night; he said there would be a battle not far from Tula, and that they were putting up barbed-wire entanglements.

 

12th
. I looked through my memoirs to find some information for Denisenko, who wanted to know about the times when Lev Nik. came into collision with the legal world (refusing to take the oath, the bull that gored the cattleyard worker, and so on). This is a difficult task, but I shall attempt to do it. The weather is brighter and finer but my health is worse—I am terrified I may have paralysis of the throat, like my father. My Tanya is even more precious to me—she has grown prettier recently too.

 

16th
. All the soldiers of the 21st Cavalry Regiment have now left. The younger ones turned out to be good lads, and the older ones were thoroughly decent people.

 

17th
. My daughter Tanya's birthday. I went into her wing to greet her and gave her a little porcelain cup—my mother's last present to me—containing a gold 10-ruble piece. I want to give everything away before my death, which will be very soon now. My choking cough is turning into something like whooping cough—this is my 3rd attack. The weather is overcast and cold, below freezing. It's cold in the house; the winter glazing hasn't been put in and the stoves haven't been mended. We're expecting battles near Yasnaya Polyana.*

 

19th
. There was a meeting to decide how best to defend Yasnaya Polyana against looting.* Nothing has yet been decided. Carts, oxen and people are streaming down the highway to Tula.