Authors: Vanessa Skye
Karen confirmed their suspicions. “Yes, I told her everything. Like I said before, she made me feel worse.” She frowned, wrinkling her swollen, freckled nose while trying to sit up a bit straighter in the bed.
“Can you describe her?” Jay asked.
“Brown eyes, thick glasses, brown hair with bangs, kinda heavy I think, but short. She wore a winter coat, so it was hard to tell. She asked me a lot of questions. I didn’t like her.”
“Do you mind if I send a sketch artist in to get your description?”
“Okay.”
“Weird questions?” Berg asked.
“Yeah, she asked me if I had any family, if I’d had a rape examination, what my injuries are, if the police had interviewed me yet, what I remembered, and what the guy looked like.”
“Tell me, Karen, did you tell the rape counselor that same thing you told us about the delivery van? Where it came from?” Jay asked.
“Yes. She asked me to tell her everything.” Karen’s bottom lip quivered. “Then I must have passed out again. When I woke up, she was gone.”
“That’s okay. They’re sending you another counselor tomorrow,” Berg said. “I think the one you saw this morning was a fill-in. But if the same one comes back, can you please call me straight away?”
Karen nodded as she snuggled down into the bed and closed her eyes.
Berg and Jay shut the door quietly behind them.
“You didn’t want her to know the counselor might have been a murderer? What if she comes back?”
“Unlikely. Karen’s not the target, and the counselor got the information she needed. Besides, the poor woman’s been through enough,” Berg replied.
In the hallway, Berg tracked down a nurse and gave her the description of the strange counselor. The nurse thought for a moment, then nodded.
“Yes. That sounds like one of our best volunteers, Irene. She’s been here for a few years.”
“Is she here now?” Jay asked. “We’d like to talk to her.”
“No, detectives. She only works a few times a month.”
“You got some paperwork on her?” Berg asked.
“Of course. I’ll get it.”
Berg and Jay followed the tiny woman to the floor reception desk and watched as she pulled up a file on the computer.
“Want me to print it out for you?”
“Yes, please. Any reason Irene would be in Karen’s room? Are volunteers allowed to interact with victims of crime?” Jay questioned.
She frowned. “Well, the description you gave me certainly sounds like Irene, but no, volunteers can’t assist victims of crime. They are not trained for it. Her responsibilities include refreshing the flowers, helping surgical patients with their check-in and discharge paperwork, that sort of thing.”
The old printer came to a stop, and the nurse handed Berg a single sheet of paper.
“But there’s nothing to stop her from talking to Karen?” Berg asked.
Another frown. “Well, no, I guess not. But as I said, she is one of our best volunteers. She knows if she breaks the rules she can’t work here, or at any other hospitals in the area.”
Berg folded the sheet of paper and placed it in her pocket before handing over her card. “Please call me the second she comes back in.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
By the time they left the hospital, it was late in the evening. Each drew their long coats closer for warmth while walking to the car as the soon-to-be winter weather had started in earnest.
“Want to get something to eat?” Jay asked. “It’s late and I know a great Chinese place that’s still open.”
Berg hesitated for a moment. “Sure. I can’t even remember when I last ate. Think it was some time in the nineties.”
Jay guided the car to the restaurant, a local hangout of his. They were seated straight away, and the pair picked up their menus with intent, both starving.
“This place is great,” Jay said. “Trust me, they’ve got killer egg rolls.”
As if to prove his statement, a pretty Chinese waitress wearing a maroon server’s bib rushed over to Jay. “Mr. Jay!” she exclaimed. “I haven’t seen you for a long time!”
“Hi, Mae,” Jay said. “This is my colleague, Alicia.”
Berg was surprised and a little disconcerted at Jay’s use of her first name, as he almost always called her Berg.
Mae glanced at Berg with complete disinterest before setting her attention back on the handsome detective. “You want the usual?” she asked, ready with pen and pad in hand.
Jay looked at Berg. “Want me to order you what’s good? We’re too late for the dim sum.”
“Sure,” she said, handing her menu to Mae.
“Two usuals, thanks. And two beers.”
Mae smiled prettily before bustling off.
The beers arrived in short order, and the detectives clinked their bottlenecks together in cheers before each taking a swig. It had been a long day, even by their standards, and the beer was refreshing.
“So, can I ask you a question?” Jay asked.
Berg was pretty sure she knew what was coming and took another sip before shaking her head emphatically. “No.”
Jay continued regardless. “It’s just you seemed very upset after speaking to Karen this morning . . .”
She sighed. “Did I?”
“I just thought, maybe, you had some experience with . . . her situation?”
“Maybe violent rapes upset me,” Berg replied, taking another swig of her beer. “We’re not all testosterone-laden, knuckle-dragging Neanderthals, you know.”
Jay let the shot slide. “Of course. But this seemed to be more . . .”
“Okay,” Berg said, a smug smile playing on the corners of her mouth. “I’ll talk more about me, but you have to go first.”
“What do you mean?” Jay sat back and examined his beer bottle. “What you see is what you get with me.”
Berg snorted. “Don’t fucking play dumb, Jay. And don’t sit there and try to get my life story when you clearly have a few secrets of your own!”
Jay sighed in defeat and concentrated on peeling the label off his beer bottle. It was a long time before he spoke. “Fine. What do you want to know?”
“Tell me about your wife.”
Jay reacted badly to Berg’s last word, jerking, then banging his beer down hard on the table between sips.
“Tell me why all the guys in the station are scared to even mention it. Tell me why you fuck everything that moves, but don’t ever get close to any of them. I mean, at least I admit I have intimacy issues, but you’re so deep in denial you should have your mail redirected there!”
Jay uttered a short bark of laughter before glaring at her. “Pot to kettle, you’re black.”
Berg kept staring at him, his words having no more effect than they would on stone.
“Fine. I was married. I was young. I’m not either anymore. Does that clear it up for you?”
“Oh, yes,” Berg answered, glaring at him. “Everything’s crystal clear now, thanks. Don’t you fucking dare ask me anything about my life if that’s all you’re going to give me. So you got a divorce. Big deal. That makes you no more remarkable than fifty percent of the population. Get over it! Stop shoving your dick in everything, find yourself a new wife, and have the babies you’re so sure you want.”
Jay shook his head angrily, taking another drink. Unable to look at Berg, he stared at the table. “She’s dead.”
“Oh,” Berg muttered. “Sorry.”
Jay clenched his jaw before taking a deep breath. “We were high school sweethearts, Renee and I. We got married when we were both only twenty. I was going to be the superintendent of the CPD and she was going to be the perfect wife and mother. We were going to have two boys and two girls and be in love always.” His voice sounded emotionless, hollow. “How stupid were we?”
Berg’s hand hovered over Jay’s for a second before she pulled it back, unsure if he would welcome her touch or sympathy.
“After a couple of years of marriage we still couldn’t get pregnant. I went to the doctor and checked out fine. Naturally, Renee was convinced it was her fault, but point-blank refused to get the tests, saying she didn’t want to be told by some doctor that she was ‘not a woman.’ ” Jay paused, took a deep breath and looked away for several minutes.
The silence stretched on, and Berg was unsure of what to say.
Eventually, he continued in the same strange, dispassionate tone. “Instead, she drowned her feelings with alcohol. I should have seen it coming. She had always had a tendency to drink when she was depressed, like her parents before her. She must have felt like a failure as a wife and a woman. I was young, and I didn’t know what to say or do to make it better. She had come from a terrible home, and being a great mother and making a happy family was all she had ever wanted from life. She didn’t plan for anything else.”
Berg nodded in sympathy, even though Jay was still concentrating on the table.
Jay took a big gulp of his beer before setting it back down and grimacing. “I was a newbie in patrol back then, and a lot of the time when I got home she was drunk. Then the drinking turned into harder stuff, and before I even knew about it, she had a pretty serious meth problem. Money was disappearing. The mortgage wasn’t being paid, and there was never any food in the house. Then Renee started disappearing for days on end, too. I’d go looking for her only to get a call from friends in various districts saying they’d picked her up with some dealer.”
Berg shifted uneasily in her seat, unsure whether to reach out to him or not.
“Turns out Renee was sleeping with them to get a fix. It’s because she was married to a cop that she didn’t go to prison for possession or prostitution. Maybe it would have been better if she did; she would’ve received some kind of help.” He paused again, taking a deep breath, and quickly brushed away the tears that formed in the corner of his eyes.
This time Berg’s hand made it to Jay’s, and she held it tightly.
Jay looked at Berg gratefully, grasping her fingers.
“What happened?” Berg asked softly.
Jay, once again regaining control of his emotions, shrugged. “Nothing original. She eventually OD’d, of course, a few weeks after our third anniversary. The deputy superintendent, who was deputy chief of my district at the time, called personally to tell me they found her body. He was a friend of my father’s.” Jay took a deep, shuddering breath before taking a sip of beer.
“McClymont? Oh,” Berg whispered, now also getting insight into Jay’s connection with one of the deputy supers and why he was so reluctant to use it.
“She was . . . pregnant. Only a couple of months. The ME asked if I wanted to know if the baby was mine and offered to run the blood tests. I didn’t.” He paused. “Anyway, it was more than a decade ago now. I’m over it.” He forced a smile.
The pair sat at the table, finishing their beers in silence before the food arrived to break the somber mood.
“Two more beers?” he asked Mae, as she put enough delicious-smelling food in front of them to feed a small army.
“Wow, this looks great. I’m starved,” Berg said.
The food was as good as Jay had boasted and was all eaten in no time. Bellies full, they finished off their second beers and ordered a third each, drinking in silence.
Jay sighed. “Okay, I’ve spilled—your turn.”
“Gee, I don’t know,” Berg said, feigning deep consideration. “Seems there’s been more than enough sharing for one evening. I enjoy our superficial partnership. Let’s not ruin it with honesty or feelings.”
Jay playfully dragged her off her chair and onto his lap, locking her in place with his arms. “Like hell! Not letting you go ’til you tell me.”
Berg laughed and turned to face him before becoming painfully aware she was sitting on his lap, their faces only inches apart. Despite how good it felt, Berg struggled free, perching herself on her own chair once more.
“Please, Berg,” Jay whispered. “Please tell me?”
Berg looked away, considering what she was about to say. “Karen needed to know . . . that life goes on. That her life from this point forward and how she chooses to deal with what happened is up to her. That he cannot take her future or self-worth away from her unless she lets him.”
Good advice. Why can’t I take it?
Jay smiled forlornly. “You’ve gone to your sad place.”
“My sad place?” Berg asked.
“Sometimes, when you get that look on your face, I know you’re thinking about something sad. You go there a lot, you know.”
Berg frowned. “Oh.”
Jay put his hand on Berg’s knee. “What happened?”
Even through her pants, Jay’s hand felt like it was setting her leg on fire. She moved, crossing her legs away from him. “Take a hint, Jay. I don’t want to talk about it. It was a long time ago.”