The Final Curtsey (20 page)

Authors: Margaret Rhodes

My eldest brother, John, the 17th Lord Elphinstone, died in 1975. My younger brother, Andrew, predeceased him that same year, and so Andrew’s son James became the 18th Lord Elphinstone.
Sadly he died young and the present Lord Elphinstone is his eldest son, Alexander. My eldest sister, Elizabeth, died in 1980, on the very day that the ‘Old Bull and Bush’ was presented
to Queen Elizabeth as a birthday present. It was an awful shock. My sister had been a bridesmaid at my aunt’s wedding to the Duke of York, and they had always been close. Only eleven years
separated them, and they were more like sisters than aunt and niece. However, the inauguration of the ‘Old Bull and Bush’ had to go ahead, as Queen Elizabeth did not want to disappoint
the many friends who had travelled to Scotland for the occasion. My sister Elizabeth’s death cast a shadow over an otherwise lovely day, but she was well remembered during the long and lively
lunch presided over by her aunt. Elizabeth was fourteen years older than me; very kind and loving. She was keen on ornithology and we would spend long, cold hours, scanning the beaches of Aberlady,
trying to identify ducks and waders. She was also keen on God and when she was in an evangelising mood would lure me into her bedroom to pray. She was dismayed that I did not take this seriously
enough. I found it positively embarrassing to kneel down, in cold blood so to speak, and try to talk to my maker.

Elizabeth never married and, being very holy in the sweetest way, helped the Christian author Amy Buller, whose writings had much impressed Queen Elizabeth, to set up the King George VI and
Queen Elizabeth Foundation of St Catherine in Cumberland Lodge, not far from where I live in Windsor Great Park. The Foundation now runs residential courses for students who go there to examine, in
the context of Christian philosophy, the fundamental assumptions underlying political, economic, and scientific activities.

My other sister, Jean, died in 1999, a few weeks after her husband Major John Wills. She suffered a heart attack during a lunch party given by Queen Elizabeth at Clarence House after the
memorial service for Lord Dalhousie, her Lord Chamberlain. Queen Elizabeth calmly led her guests from the room, while Jean was given medical attention. She died later the same day in hospital. Jean
put great store on royalty, and it became a rather bad family joke that it suited her beautifully to die (almost) in a grand royal residence. Jean was livelier than Elizabeth: she lived quite close
to me and we saw a lot of each other. I well remember the day she telephoned me in a panic. Her cook had succumbed to a virus and she was due to give a dinner party that night with the sometimes
demanding Princess Margaret as the guest of honour. I immediately volunteered my services as cook, so as to free the hostess to be gracious, cool and entertaining. The first course was some sort of
cold dish, followed by poussin, neither of which presented any problems. I derived some wry amusement from observing the guests through the serving hatch, as I knew most of them and wondered
whether they had guessed the true identity of the Mrs Bridges in the kitchen.

Jean wanted a cheese soufflé as the savoury, and this threw me. The timing for a soufflé is critical, as it is liable to collapse. My soufflé refused to perform, resting
lifeless in the unpredictable Aga, as the empty chicken plates returned and the guests began to wonder when the next course was coming. I fell to my knees in front of the oven and began to pray to
whichever saint prevents culinary disasters. Miraculously the soufflé began to rise and I was able to deliver perfection. Jean had hired an occasional butler for the evening, and we became
friends in adversity. Shortly afterwards I was invited to dinner by some neighbours, only to find my new friend the butler in attendance. He was deeply shocked that the cook should presume to
attempt admittance to the kitchen through the front door!

* * *

2011 began for me when I went to see the highly successful film
The King’s Speech
, which I greatly enjoyed and found immensely moving. It was pretty accurate and
excellently acted by Colin Firth as King George VI and Helena Bonham Carter as Queen Elizabeth. It told the inspirational story of the King overcoming his speech impediment with the help of the
therapist Lionel Logue and with the support of his wife.

On 29th April, I was very fortunate to be invited to the wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton at Westminster Abbey and to attend the reception afterward at Buckingham Palace. It was
clear that they were palpably, tremendously, in love with each other, and Kate looked wonderful in her beautiful wedding dress. It was a happy day and the public came out to cheer the couple and
there was a feeling of real love and support for the Royal Family. It was a perfect moment when they drove off from the reception in Charles’ open sports car, with Kate’s veil billowing
behind her. Having been a bridesmaid at the wedding of Princess Elizabeth and Prince Philip, I was later followed by my daughter, Annabel, who was a bridesmaid to Princess Margaret, and I was
preceded by my elder sister, Elizabeth, who was a bridesmaid at the wedding of the Duke and Duchess of York in 1923. As a family, we seem to have done our share of Royal weddings. Such events are
very memorable and, even if the details may get somewhat blurred, the imagery remains embedded in one’s mind.

William and Kate had a long courtship, but I hope that that will give their marriage a more certain stability. Personally, I feel sure that they will form a long and lasting companionship, which
will, perhaps, help them when it is their turn to take on the heavy duty of service when William becomes King. However, there isn’t a marriage in the world that doesn’t suffer the odd
hiccough or difficulty. You weather them. I told my children that life is like making a tapestry. You have one gold thread that you have to weave through the tapestry, which is your marriage.
Sometimes it gets frayed and sometimes it gets very worn, but you have to work hard to keep your gold thread still weaving its way through your life together.

I was able to attend Prince Philip’s 90th birthday on 12th June at St George’s Chapel, Windsor, although his actual birthday was two days earlier. It was a lovely service, attended
naturally by all his family and by representatives of all his associations and patronages. The service was to honour his many achievements and his devotion to the country that has so happily
accepted him. He had fought with distinction in the Second World War and then in peace turned his attention to many important matters, including the Award scheme that still bears his name. His
activities, even at 90, cover the widest imaginable range of interests, and he has carved out an important career for himself. It is nice to know that they will be celebrating the Queen’s
Diamond Jubilee next year, with over 65 years of marriage behind them.

The marriage of Zara Phillips, Princess Anne’s daughter, to the England rugby player Mike Tindall, could not have been in greater contrast to that of William and Kate. It was an informal
and low-key occasion, lasting for forty-five minutes and planned to suit the bride and groom, both top in their different fields of sport. It took place at Canongate Kirk on 30th July, on
Edinburgh’s famous Royal Mile.

* * *

In June 2012, the Queen will celebrate 60 years as monarch, having become Queen on the death of her father on 6 February 1952. This is a marvellous achievement and one that will
be celebrated throughout the country, with official occasions and street parties across the land. Throughout her reign the Queen has had Prince Philip by her side, a constant and remarkable
consort, who has made the Queen’s role much easier than would otherwise have been the case. He has been a constant support.

I have been fortunate to have had the Queen as my cousin and to have seen first-hand what she has achieved. She did not expect to become the monarch, which happened as her Uncle David abdicated
the throne, which passed to the Queen’s father, George VI, as the second brother. He was a very successful monarch, with my aunt, Queen Elizabeth, at his side. But his life was cruelly cut
short aged 56, and the Queen became monarch at the tender age of 25.

As I have recounted in this book, I knew the Queen from a young age, when I shared family holidays in Scotland with Princess Elizabeth and Princess Margaret. I had the chance to realise what a
special person Princess Elizabeth was. When she was not even a teenager, she knew that she would one day succeed her father, who had become King in 1936. This was something that she accepted with
seriousness and a strong sense of duty, as she knew that it was very unlikely that there would be a brother who would become the Monarch instead of her.

Throughout her life, my cousin has had this strong sense of service. Since she became Queen, she has always had deep concern for her subjects. Throughout her reign, she has served 12 prime
ministers, and always assiduously carried out her constitutional duties. She has kept herself informed of the important affairs of states. In her lifetime, the country and the Monarchy have
markedly changed, but the one constant has been the role of the Queen. The
annus horribilis
of 1992, when two of her children were divorced, and there was a major fire at Windsor Castle, was
clearly a time of great sadness for the Queen. But it was when Princess Diana died in 1997 that there was a new mood about the Monarchy and the Royal family, which was unique in her reign.

A lot has been written about the outpouring of emotion at the death of Diana. The Queen and Prince Philip were at Balmoral with the children when the news reached them, and her instinct was to
do everything to protect the grandchildren from the full glare of grief and publicity. This was misinterpreted as her being out of touch with the prevailing mood, but nothing could have been
further from the mind of the Queen, who as I know, is a caring and feeling person. When they returned to Buckingham Palace where the Royal Ensign was flown at half mast, the Queen and Prince Philip
went out to meet the crowds outside the Palace, amidst a sea of floral tributes to Diana. The mood gradually changed, but it was to take many years before normality returned.

The Queen has weathered many storms, both public and private, but her steadfast faith has always carried her through. If 1992 was an
annus horribilis
, then 2011 was an
annus
mirabilis
, with the wedding of William and Kate, Prince Philip’s 90th birthday and the marriage of Zara Phillips and Mike Tindall.

The Queen, from her childhood years, has always enjoyed the country pursuits, especially at Balmoral and Sandringham. Her love of horses, particularly on the racecourse, has often been commented
on. In the dog world she has broken tradition by her trial of a new potential breed of dog, a Dorgi – a union of corgi and dachshund.

Reference points for certainty are rare, but Her Majesty is without doubt one of them. In 1952 she found herself young, bereaved, and yet Head of State at a time when her country urgently needed
to reshape its identity and its world role. That she rose to the occasion is, in my view, a remarkable achievement. Loyalty and service have been her priorities throughout her reign. She has upheld
the constitution and, above all, she has kept a sense of perspective and a level head when others have been losing theirs.

The Queen has made it absolutely clear that: ‘My job is for life. It has been a question of maturing into something that one has got used to doing and accepting the fact that it is your
fate.’ In 2012, her Diamond Jubilee year, the Queen, to my intense pleasure, has emerged as the consummate master of her role. The nation has cause to be grateful. I certainly am.

List of Plates

Queen Elizabeth, painted by Sue Crawford

With The Queen at Balmoral

With The Queen at The Garden House

Queen Elizabeth and me, 1982

The Queen and me at Balmoral

Queen Elizabeth and me at Polvier, Birkhall, c. 1984

Queen Elizabeth and The Queen on Queen Elizabeth’s 76th birthday

The Queen at Glen Beg, Balmoral

Queen Elizabeth at Polvier, Birkhall

Princess Margaret at Leoville Barton, October 1994

Queen Elizabeth, my sister Jean and me at Birkhall