“I think our moms would be best buddies. She said my hair used to be my glory. Vivian loved it too. It felt so good to shave it off,” Oksana said.
Annie leaned down so their foreheads were touching. “You have to put your shirt back on.”
Oksana tilted her head up so their lips were touching. “Why?”
“Because we’re having a serious conversation and you’re making my butterflies horny.”
“That’s the point,” Oksana whispered.
Annie looked at her a few moments longer. She wanted to talk more, but there was something irresistible about being near Oksana, and if she started stripping, it was hard to focus on much else. It was still early in the afternoon and Annie had to come up with a budget for a possible production trip to Paris.
Oksana leaned up a bit further and drew her tongue across Annie’s bottom lip. “Let’s go to bed.”
“I have something to tell you first.” A simple truth that Annie didn’t think would matter until now. Oksana sat back, a wary look on her face. “My parents pay for my place too. I’m almost thirty. I have a good job and all I really pay for are my clothes and my food.”
“That doesn’t bother me,” Oksana said. “I don’t pay rent at Baba’s.”
“I know, but—”
“Annie, the cost of real estate in Southern California is outrageous. At best, I thought you rented this place at a deal. I never thought you were paying a mortgage on a house this size in Venice. I know reality TV doesn’t pay that much.”
“Oh.” Annie hadn’t anticipated Oksana to be so keen to that aspect of her situation.
“If things go south, like way south, just don’t shut me out. Okay? Tell me what’s going on. Tell me what to expect. That’s what I couldn’t stand about Vivian. It wasn’t that her life wasn’t a perfect fit for me. She never cared about me enough to let me in. She didn’t give enough of a shit about me to just leave me alone.”
“Or maybe she never cared about herself enough to go after what she really wanted,” Annie said.
“Maybe.” Oksana nodded toward the bedroom one more time. “I don’t want to talk anymore. Let’s go.”
Annie stood and led the way down the hall, walking a bit slower when she felt Oksana’s hand on her waist. Oksana undressed Annie as they made their way to her bedroom, leaving a trail of clothing in their wake.
Naked, Annie slid on top of the covers and waited for Oksana to follow. Annie rubbed her breasts as Oksana shucked out of her jeans, pinching her thick nipples to a peak.
“Are those for me?” Oksana asked as she crawled over Annie. She didn’t wait for an answer. Instead, she went straight for Annie’s lips.
They kissed slowly as Annie stretched out on her back. She let go of her chest and starting pawing along Oksana’s skin. Their legs tangled together, a sweet pressure building in Annie’s clit and nipples.
Oksana’s fingers found Annie’s pussy. She was wet, but not as wet as she wanted to be. Oksana was patient, caressing Annie’s entrance, massaging her wetness out of her. She moved down Annie’s body, licking and kissing her neck until she reached her breasts. She kissed along the top, licked in between the ripe curves. Annie’s moans filled the room.
Annie could feel the temperature rising between her legs. Her heart was thumping. There was no need for comparisons anymore. There was no room for it. There was only Oksana.
Oksana pushed a finger inside and then another. Annie reached for her breast and held it up for Oksana to suck. Oksana traced the tip with her tongue, sucked it between her lips until Annie arched and moaned again. It took a while, longer than Annie anticipated for her to come, but she enjoyed the ride. Oksana had the perfect touch. Her kisses were still electric, but Annie couldn’t seem to turn her mind off. She couldn’t focus on her pleasure. All her senses were tuned to Oksana. The feel of
her
skin and the skill of her tongue. Annie wasn’t chasing an orgasm, just more time with Oksana. She didn’t want the afternoon to end.
It doesn’t have to
, she realized. They could be together. This wasn’t part of the fantasy. They were together now, and all the wishes and dreams she’d had about Oksana had come true and doubled over into a rightness that couldn’t be matched. There was nothing keeping them apart anymore.
Annie came, trembling beneath Oksana. Before she settled, she added her own fingers to the mix. She watched Oksana’s eyes as she stroked her clit.
“Fuck me some more,” Annie whispered.
Oksana obliged. She pulled her fingers out, just for a moment and traced Annie’s swollen lips below her clit. She was soaked now, her juices coating her pussy and her ass. Annie sighed as Oksana plunged her fingers back in, deeper, twisting against and stroking the right spots. Annie couldn’t hold her orgasm back this time. She came quickly and hard and nearly blacked out as Oksana drew her cum out of her. She squirted, just a little, but enough to make her jerk and cry out on the sheets.
It was ages before she opened her eyes. Oksana was still touching her with gentle strokes up and down her thighs with her other arm wrapped around her waist.
“Do you want me to get a strap-on?”
“No. Why?” Annie panted.
“I didn’t know if you missed being fucked that way.”
“I like your fingers just fine. Come here.” Annie gripped Oksana’s hips and motioned for her to move up the bed. She didn’t stop until her knees were on either side of Annie’s head. Annie latched on to Oksana’s pussy with her mouth, drawing her wet lips in. She scraped her with her teeth, teased her with her tongue until Oksana started to move. Annie held on to her hips as Oksana rode her face. Her motions were fierce and jerking and some of the sexiest undulations Annie had ever experienced. She encouraged her. Annie cupped Oksana’s ass, rocking her back and forth, probing her hole with the sweetness that was spread all around. She devoured every inch, hoping in the back of her mind that at some point she would be enough to heal what Vivian had done. Would anything be enough for that sort of repair?
Oksana spent into Annie’s mouth and she swallowed every available drop. She orgasmed again, rolling her forehead against the wall as she screamed Annie’s name. “Anne. Anne.”
When her thighs couldn’t take much more, Oksana collapsed beside Annie on the bed, breathless and blinking. She slid close to Oksana’s still trembling body and stroked her hair.
“I think about you all the time,” Annie whispered. She didn’t know where the confession came from, but she wanted Oksana to know.
“I think about your dimples.” Oksana touched her face as she smiled. A second later, she drifted off.
Annie left Oksana sleeping and snuck to the living room to grab her computer and her phone. There were two missed calls and a text. All from Shane.
*
Two days later, Annie still hadn’t answered Shane.
Annie stared at the texts—
Hey, where are you? I want to bowl. Call me. Call me bitch. Don’t make me come over. Are you dead? Don’t text me back if you are—
and didn’t know how to respond. She wanted to tell Shane
and
Feather the truth, but in a spiteful way. She wanted Shane and her mother off her back. She wanted them to know the truth so they could get a head start on accepting the new person Annie had become, the person she was meant to be, and the person she was meant to be with. Annie had been avoiding Shane for over a week now, but she had to reply before Shane did something foolish like showing up at her house while Oksana was there.
“I’m sending Jewel to get Thai for lunch. You want anything?” Esther asked.
“Uh, yeah,” Annie replied. Esther wrote down her order then glanced back up.
“I must say you are pretty ballsy, or you must have some serious faith in your trainer.”
Annie froze with her hand on a stack of time sheets. “What do you mean?”
“I couldn’t eat chicken Pad Thai and not have it go straight to my thighs. If Pace and I were getting married, I wouldn’t eat for a year beforehand.”
“Oh yeah. I’m not really worried about it. Oksana’s a genius in the gym.”
“Obviously.” Esther chuckled as she walked out of their office.
Annie felt terrible. When she and Oksana were together, the rest of the world didn’t exist. Annie was still happy, happier than when they first agreed to give each other a chance, but she was so tired of pretending her wedding was still going to happen.
She had to tell Shane and Feather the truth and her parents, but Jeff had to know first. Annie hadn’t heard from him in a while. She expected she might not hear from him again until he got home. Clearly, he was having a blast. Annie couldn’t decide whether that made things better or worse. Would Jeff remember this trip as the reason his engagement fell apart? If he hadn’t taken the trip, Annie might never have been with Oksana. Would he blame himself for that? There was no way for Annie to know until they talked, and that conversation was still days away.
Annie couldn’t avoid Shane that whole time. She dialed her number.
“Oh, hey. Finally taking calls, are you?” Shane said. She was pissed.
“Hey. Sorry, it’s been kind of crazy at work. I was trying to catch up on sleep this weekend.” Which was sort of true. She’d brought her computer back to bed, but as soon as she laid eyes on Oksana, she decided a cuddle nap was a better idea than working on a budget. They’d slept all afternoon, ordered pizza for dinner, then watched a documentary on the history of Africans in Latin America. Annie was starting to understand Oksana’s love of history. It was pretty cool learning things about the world you never even considered before.
“Feather came out of the tipi. I took her for some real food and we went to the movies. You should have come. We decided what shoes we’re going to wear and constructed a whole plot to kidnap you for your bachelorette party.” Right, the shoes. Megan had mentioned they were all going to wear different shoes during the ceremony.
“I know. I’m sorry. What are you up to this weekend?” Annie cursed herself as soon as the words left her mouth. She already had plans this weekend.
“Nothing yet. You want to hang out?”
“Uh, yeah. Sergio got this new pilot green lit, so let me just make sure I don’t have to be on set, but if not, it’s me and you.”
“And Megan and Feather. They miss you too. Let’s do something before Jeff gets back.”
“Yeah, okay. I’ll let you know.”
Shane seemed okay with that.
*
A couple days later, Annie met Shane near her office. It was awkward and forced, but Shane was so busy chatting about the wedding she didn’t seem to notice.
On Friday night, Annie told Shane she was sick.
On Saturday, she ignored her calls.
The Truth
The doorbell rang, but that didn’t stop Annie’s pacing. She was ready. She hated to hurt Jeff. It still made her sick to think of breaking his heart, but things between them were over, and Annie had to tell him the whole truth.
Jeff had flown in that afternoon. He and the boys took a shuttle from the airport. Beyond getting back to his house and washing the Europe off his face, Jeff hadn’t tried to make any official plans. He wanted to come over so they could catch up. He had stories, according to his last e-mail. The only other e-mail he’d sent during his trip, but Annie wasn’t bothered by the lack of communication.
The last few weeks had been exceptionally good for her and Oksana. There were moments of awkwardness when the elephant in the room would make a strange noise and draw them both out of the haze of their deepening relationship. A call from Shane, Feather, or worse, Annie’s mom, while they lounged on Baba’s couch. A simple question from Kat about Annie’s wedding dress.
When the beast was silent, though, Annie felt herself settling into this new life, a new partnership with Oksana that felt perfectly right. She had a new family of sorts in Kat and Baba Inna, who now included Annie in everything, and she’d grown closer to Noelle and Ronnie in that time too. She even had Megan’s continued reassurance that she was doing the right thing when it came to Oksana. Annie knew where she belonged, and now that Jeff had returned, she could close the door on that part of her life and start fresh. He didn’t deserve to be disregarded, but Annie deserved to be happy, and that happiness came in a very specific form.
She would have to deal with the aftermath of any regular breakup and the questions that came once people discovered you were seeing someone else. There would be questions about Oksana, and the extremely annoying questions about what happened with her and Jeff. Annie refused to go into detail about either. But she would defend what she had with Oksana and defend what used to be with Jeff. It wasn’t his fault; they simply weren’t meant to be.
The back bell rang again. Annie had to answer it.
Oksana had offered her services in any way she could, but all Annie needed her to do was wait. Oksana hesitantly agreed, and for now, she was on standby for a call or a text from Annie that begged her to come and console. Hopefully, it wouldn’t get to that.
By the time she made it to the backdoor, Annie was shaking. Her stomach was in a sour knot. If she’d had enough nerves to eat anything at work, she would definitely throw it up.