Doors slammed on one of the police cruisers. It started up and drove off slowly, its headlights making a cone of brightness through the trees and the gloom. After it was gone, Jason turned his attention back to Hayden.
“Colton Rivers saw you with Jesse Dean. Downtown in Center Park. This was right after you came back and left Sierra at our house.”
“Jesse Dean wanted to cruise, just like in high school. He said we were having our own little reunion.”
“That’s a small reunion.”
“Derrick was there too. We were good friends the way you and Logan and Regan were.”
“Derrick was there?”
And then he remembered what Colton had told him about that night at Center Park. There was someone in the backseat, someone Colton couldn’t see.
“Wait a minute. Derrick was already in town back then?” he asked.
“I met him and Jesse Dean here. I needed to talk to both of them. I came to town to tell them that I knew they’d killed Logan on graduation night. When we were younger, and I was so
messed up and irresponsible, I told myself I didn’t want to know about all the stuff they’d done. But I couldn’t stay quiet forever. I told them I didn’t really care why they did it, but they had dragged me into the middle of it, and I wasn’t going to be quiet about it anymore. If they wanted, they could step forward and admit what happened. Otherwise, I was going to tell. I didn’t even know who I was going to tell. Logan’s family. Maybe the police. I certainly didn’t know how that would go. But I was going to admit what I knew.”
“What made you think those guys would listen to you?”
“I’ve got a little news flash for you, big brother. Your little sister thinks that people can change and grow. She thinks that if you present someone with an opportunity to be a different person, a better person, they’ll take it. It happened to me when I cleaned up, so I assumed they might be open to it as well. Hell, years had gone by. I thought maybe everyone would welcome the chance to make things right. And, short of that, I had to be the kind of person, the kind of mother, I wanted to be for my daughter. I had to do, or try to do, the right thing. I had to try. I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t.”
“But a guy like Jesse Dean? Jesus, Hayden.”
“I was going to come forward no matter what. I cared about those guys. I married Derrick. I wanted to give them the chance. I didn’t want to blindside them.”
“Do you know how insane that sounds? How did you think you would stop Jesse Dean from coming after you or Sierra? Obviously, it didn’t work.”
“Didn’t work? That would be the understatement of the century. The whole thing blew up in my face. Not only did Jesse Dean refuse to come forward—he threatened me. He said he’d
kill me if I tried to do it. Derrick helped with that a little. He stood up for me. He said there wouldn’t be any killing.”
“Was he here the whole time? The police talked to him in Indianapolis.”
“He went back and forth. When Jesse Dean calmed down a little and was keeping me out here, Derrick went home to Indiana.”
“He left you with Jesse Dean?”
“I told him to. He really did get a new job and a new start there. I wasn’t alone. Jesse Dean had that awful Rose Holland with him some of the time.” Hayden shuddered. “Talk about how the mighty have fallen.”
“She killed our neighbors’ cat because she wanted to send a message to you.”
“Figures. She’s disgusting. But Derrick was going to come back eventually, when he could, but then Jesse Dean made things even worse.”
“What did he do?”
Hayden looked toward the back of the ambulance again. She motioned with her hand in the opposite direction, and she and Jason moved away from the vehicle where it was certain Sierra couldn’t hear them.
“Jesse Dean got it into his mind that I had told other people what I knew. First, he asked me about you. He thought I’d spilled this whole story to you, and if something happened to me, you’d go to the cops. I guess maybe he had a little talk with you about that.”
“He did. He was very convincing.”
“Well, guess who he was worried about next?”
“He sent Tricia to try to get Sierra away from us.”
“I know.”
“He offered her drugs if she got Sierra out of the house. We said no.”
“Thank you. That was smart.”
“But then Derrick showed up. We couldn’t say no then.”
“That was Jesse Dean again. He wouldn’t stop talking about Sierra. And let me tell you, that was the worst part of the whole thing for me. I wanted her to be as far away from here as possible. I left her with you because I wanted her to be with family, you know, if something happened to me. And I knew you’d both protect her. But Jesse Dean wouldn’t let it go. I think he might have even gone and looked for Sierra at my house. He left me alone a couple of times. He tied me up good. See?”
She held up her arm, and Jason saw a raw bruise that encircled her wrist.
“I thought you weren’t a hostage,” he said. “Don’t try to sugarcoat what these guys did to you. And Sierra. And how did blood get in your car?”
“That was my fault.”
“Your fault?”
“I tried to get away from Jesse Dean, and I smacked my nose against the doorframe of the car. Really. It was klutzy, but it just bled. He took my shoes then. He locked the keys in the car, so it would look like I’d run off or something. I don’t know what he was thinking.”
Jason looked down and noticed for the first time that his sister wore no shoes. “Jesus, Hayden.”
“I was worried about Sierra more than myself.”
“Sierra spent some time in your house. Jesse Dean must have just missed her. Somebody broke in the back window.”
“Jesse Dean had my house keys, but he must have wanted to
make it look like a random burglary or something.” She sniffed. “Eventually, Jesse Dean called Derrick and told him to get Sierra and bring her out here.”
“Why did Derrick do that, for Christ’s sake?”
“Because of me. Derrick was worried that Jesse Dean would hurt
me
if he didn’t. And Derrick is as dumb as I am. He thought he could calm Jesse Dean down. He thought if he brought Sierra out here and let him see that she didn’t know anything, then Jesse Dean would let her go. I guess Derrick thought he could get us all out of it. I wouldn’t have brought Sierra out here. I was willing to trade my life for hers.”
“And that’s when Derrick killed him?”
“Jesse Dean didn’t calm down. He didn’t act reasonable. He threatened all of us. Sierra was there. I made sure to get between her and Jesse Dean in case he tried something crazy. Eventually Derrick made a move to get us all out of there. I could tell he was working up to something. He had a look on his face. I tried to tell him not to. I gave him a look that said not to do it.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. I was hoping there was another way to end it all. I thought maybe someone would come out here and help. And, look, someone did. If he’d only waited a few more minutes.”
“What did he do?”
“He grabbed ahold of that andiron. The thing from the fireplace. He thought Jesse Dean didn’t see him, and he went for him.” Hayden looked away from Jason as her body shivered. “I’ve never seen a fight like that. It was like two animals. Jesse Dean was pummeling Derrick, but then Derrick managed to get one good swing in, and that killed Jesse Dean. Split his face open like that.”
Jason knew they were both seeing the disturbing visual, the
ugly sight of Jesse Dean’s dead body they had left behind in the cabin. He suspected they’d both be seeing it for a long time.
“Are you okay?” Jason asked. “Really okay?”
Hayden arched her back. She stretched like someone who had been sitting still for a long time. She seemed to be trying to release a lot of tension from her body. “You know me, big brother. I always land on my feet. I can’t worry about myself too much. I have to worry about Sierra now.”
“I’m sorry.”
“What did Derrick say to you after I left the cabin?”
Jason felt his skin flush in the dark. He was embarrassed just thinking about it, embarrassed that he ever drove Derrick to feel the way he did.
“He told me the truth,” Jason said. “That I always thought he was trash.”
“He was sensitive about that. Especially with our family. He didn’t want Sierra growing up thinking her dad wasn’t good enough for the family.”
“I did the same thing to you,” Jason said. “I asked Derrick why he and Jesse Dean killed Logan. I assumed it was about you, that you and Logan . . . that you two were fucking or something and that’s why they killed him.”
He turned his eyes to Hayden. She was watching her brother, but she didn’t show any hurt or disappointment. In a way, Jason wished she would. He felt he deserved it, and somehow her lack of a response made him feel worse.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“Logan and I just played games with each other. We weren’t going to do anything. Do you want to know why?” she asked, raising her eyebrows. “Because he wasn’t interested in me. I wasn’t good enough for him. I never would have been.”
Jason paused a moment, then said, “Derrick said something about Sierra before I left. He said that he still cared about her . . . Wait. Also that nothing had changed between them. What was he talking about?”
Hayden looked at the ground. Her shoulders rose and fell as she heaved a big sigh. “I came clean with Derrick about something else when we were out in that cabin, something having to do with Sierra.”
“What about her?”
“It’s not about her so much. It’s about me . . . and Jesse Dean and Derrick. I wasn’t going to tell either one of them about it, but then I thought it might help protect Sierra. I don’t think it did because it just drove Derrick further over the edge.”
Jason’s mind spun with possibilities. “Something you thought would protect Sierra from Jesse Dean?” Then the pieces fell into place in Jason’s head. “Are you serious, Hayden?”
She nodded. “I told them both that there’s at least a decent chance Jesse Dean is Sierra’s biological father. I was out of control back then, and we were all friends. And a few times Jesse Dean and I . . . Derrick suspected. He suspected, and he didn’t say anything about it. One of the times with Jesse Dean happened around when I got pregnant with Sierra.”
“That doesn’t prove anything, I guess.”
“No. But Derrick and I tried to have another baby later on. We really tried, and it never worked. I wonder if he couldn’t. You see, that’s why I thought Jesse Dean could be reasoned with. I thought if he knew that Sierra might be his . . . well, I thought he wouldn’t hurt her. And I thought he might want to come clean on everything to set the record straight after all these years. Maybe he’d have something to look forward to. I didn’t tell Sierra.”
“Tell me what, Mom?”
They both turned in the direction of the voice.
Sierra stood by the side of the ambulance. She looked uncertain, slightly unsteady, but she smiled when she saw her mother and uncle.
“Nothing, baby,” Hayden said, and she went to her daughter. “Nothing at all.”
“You can let go, Mom. I’m fine. Really.”
Hayden stepped back and cupped Sierra’s face in her hands. She studied her daughter intently. “Are you sure?”
“They said I’m fine. Nothing happened to me. Nobody hurt me.”
“I’m still worried.”
“You were the one who was out here in the woods for more than a week.”
“I’m good,” Hayden said. “Don’t worry about me, okay?”
Sierra looked past her mother and made eye contact with Jason. She smiled when she saw her uncle, then slipped past her mom and came over to give Jason a hug.
“It’s good to see you again,” Jason said.
He held his niece for a long time. It seemed as though she might be ready to let go, but Jason held tight to her a little longer. The length of the hug and his desire to extend it surprised Jason, but it felt right.
When he finally did let go, Jason asked, “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine.”
“I’m sorry . . . about everything you’ve been through.”
“Have you seen my dad?” she asked.
“He’s with the police still,” Jason said. “He could be there a while.”
Sierra nodded. She folded her arms across her chest and looked to her mother, who came over and placed an arm around her daughter’s shoulders.
“You should go home,” Jason said.
“Home?” Hayden laughed. “All the way to Redman County? I don’t even know where my car is.”
“The police have it,” Jason said. “Sierra’s the one who found it up on the Bluff.”
“I know,” Hayden said. “She told me.”
“Come back to our house,” Jason said. “You’re both welcome there. You can spend the night and get the car back from the police tomorrow.” Jason looked around. “I don’t even know where
my
car is.”
“The police said they’d take us where we needed to go,” Hayden said.
“Uncle Jason?”
“Yeah?”
Sierra seemed to be choosing her words carefully. She didn’t speak right away, and then she looked over at her mother. Hayden nodded, as though the two of them had discussed what Sierra wanted to say. She turned back to Jason.
“It’s not your fault I left with my dad,” she said. “I wanted to go. I was kind of pissed at you, to be honest. I didn’t like the way you seemed to be looking at Mom, like you didn’t trust her. And like you didn’t really trust me either.”
“I shouldn’t have—”
“I just want to say . . . when we were in that cabin . . . I
knew you were going to come. I told my dad that I wasn’t worried about being there because I knew somehow you’d make it out here and find us.”
Hayden pulled Sierra closer to her. Jason looked away, his eyes turning up to the stars, which swam a little in his vision. One of them blinked on and off, a distant satellite tracking through the night.
“Thanks,” he said. “I just wanted to make sure both of you were all right.”
“We are,” Hayden said. “Or we will be. Right, kiddo?”
“Right, Mom. Of course.”
* * *
As the police cruiser neared town, Jason checked his phone. He had service again, and he called Nora to let them know the three of them were on their way to the house.
“Thank God,” Nora said. “The police called me and told me you were all out in the middle of the woods somewhere.”
“Everybody’s okay. Well, the three of us are okay. Derrick’s in some trouble, but I can explain it all when we get there.”
“Okay,” she said. “I’m glad you’re safe.”
“I know. We’ll see you soon.”
“Jason?”
“Yes?”
“Are you really okay?” she asked.
“I am. I promise.”
He put the phone away. As they approached the house, Jason saw a familiar sight parked on the street. “My car,” he said.
When they climbed out of the cruiser, Jason walked around to the front of his car where he saw a note tucked under the windshield. He read it to himself, the writing an erratic scrawl.
“Hey Chief—I did what I said I’d do and brought the car back too. Now leave me alone.”
Jason smiled. He folded the note and tucked it in his pants pocket. Sierra and Hayden stood on the sidewalk with him, and they all looked up as Nora opened the front door. Jason wanted to go to his wife, but he stopped himself. There was more he had to find out from Hayden.
“Sierra?” Jason said. “Do you mind going on in for a second? We’ll be right there.”
“Sure,” she said.
He watched Sierra go up the steps and get folded into Nora’s arms. Nora held her niece for a long time, then looked down to the sidewalk where Jason and Hayden were standing.
“We’re okay,” Jason said to her. “Just give us a minute, okay?”
“Okay.” Nora waved, her face showing concern. But she guided Sierra into the house and closed the door.
Jason turned to his sister. “You know I have one more question I didn’t get the chance to ask you, right?” Jason said.
“I figured as much.”
“I told myself I wasn’t going to ask tonight. Hell, I tried to tell myself I never needed to know, but that isn’t going to work for me. Not after all this, not after enough people risked something to help me and you and Sierra out.”
“I get it.”
“Why, Hayden? Why did Jesse Dean and Derrick kill Logan that night?”
Hayden leaned against the car. She lifted her shoulders, a halfhearted shrug. “I don’t know for sure.”
“Hayden.”
“I asked. Believe me, I asked. And like I said, I don’t know.
But I can tell you the one thing I know for sure. When we were in that cabin, I heard one name mentioned more than any other.”
Jason didn’t have to ask. He knew, and he said the name out loud.
“Regan.”
Hayden nodded. “I know she’s involved. That’s why I said it was good you reconnected with her, that you were being a friend to her. If she was mixed up in Logan’s death, she’d need the support.”
“Thanks,” Jason said.
He went up the stairs and into the house. Nora and Sierra sat close to each other on the couch, and when he came in, Nora stood up and embraced him. “Are you okay? Jesus. Sierra just started to tell me what happened.”
“I’m fine. We’re all fine.” He held his wife for a long moment and then stepped back, looking into her eyes. “I have to go take care of one more thing.”
“What?”
“I have to see Regan,” he said. “I have to know some final answers.”
“Can’t the police do that stuff?” Nora asked. “Is it safe?”
“After twenty-seven years,” he said, “I need to do it myself.” He turned and started out of the house. “I’ll be in touch, I
promise.”