The Fountain of Infinite Wishes (Dare River Book 5) (36 page)

She never wanted to be without Vander or this feeling they had between them.

He tucked her close and whispered, “I love you,” and she fell to sleep listening to his heart.

When she came awake, the shower was running. Light was peeking around the edges of the curtains. She grabbed her phone and made a sound.
Seven o’clock? On a Sunday?
She thought about joining him, but good Lord, she hated being up this early unless she had to be.

The shower shut off, and she closed her eyes again. When the bathroom door opened, she turned on her side, shocked to see he was dressed.

“Where are you going?” she asked.

He started. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. I was going to leave you a note.”

She frowned. “It’s Sunday. Come here.”

“I have some work I need to do,” he said, approaching the bed. “It can’t wait.”

“But it’s Sunday! I thought we’d spend today together since you had to work yesterday.”

He looked down at the floor, and Shelby felt a moment of unease. Usually they were so in sync. He would say something like, “How do you wake up looking so beautiful and sexy?” and then he’d ruin it by adding, “Thank God you have morning breath like the rest of us mere mortals.” Something was wrong.
 

“You have church and family stuff today,” he said. “I thought you’d be caught up.”

He was always looking at her when they were together, like he didn’t want to look anywhere else, but now he was avoiding her gaze. Something was
really
wrong.

Sitting up, she tucked the sheet under her armpits. “Sure, I have church this morning, but I can miss Sunday dinner.” She still hadn’t decided to attend.

“Two weeks in a row? That’s not the Shelby I know. You love seeing your family.”

Normally she did. “I wanted things to settle down a little more. So you’d feel more comfortable coming.”

He crossed to the bed, leaned down, and kissed her on the cheek, not giving her a chance to pull him onto it with her. Then walked to the door.
 

“Don’t wait for me. Go be with them. I’ll call you later.”

He was really leaving?
“Vander, what’s wrong? Because this…something doesn’t feel right.”

Was it her imagination, or did he sigh at the doorway? Fear washed over her like cold rain.

“It’s this case,” he said, clearing his throat. “Sometimes they bother me. There’s nothing wrong between us, Shelby. Would I have used the key you gave me when I got back in the middle of the night after a horrible day if that weren’t true?”

Logically, she agreed. But something was off. She could feel it.

“Promise me you’ll come over tonight,” she said, clutching the sheet.

“I will if I can,” he told her and blew her a kiss before disappearing in the hallway.

She went to church with a heavy heart and hugged Mama extra hard when the woman squeezed her with all her strength. She went to family dinner and chatted up a storm with everyone, but her attention was split thinking about Vander. People asked after his whereabouts, and Shelby told them he was working. It was nice to have everyone send him their regards, including her pale-faced mama.

When she got home, he called, but their talk was brief. He didn’t say anything about his day, other than to say he couldn’t talk about it.
 

After she hung up the phone, she wondered what had gone wrong between them so fast.

Chapter 34

Vander felt like he was walking a tightrope between the duty he felt toward his clients and his impulse to protect Shelby and her family from the truth about their father.
 

He’d ached the whole way back to Nashville, but the impulse to go to her had been irrepressible. Making love to her had grounded him again, reminded him of who they were becoming. After she’d fallen asleep, he’d lain awake listening to her soft breathing, tortured by the decision he had to make.
 

When he could take it no longer, he’d showered early to head out before she awoke. Normally, she was a heavy sleeper, and it had cracked part of his heart to leave her, especially since he knew he’d put that hurt look on her face.

He told himself it was best to limit their time together until he’d decided what to do. After he left Shelby’s, he called Charlie and told her everything. Rather than give him a flip answer, she told him she needed to think on it. Despite the voice inside him that urged him to
hurry, hurry, hurry
, he respected her for taking it seriously.

She breezed into his office early Monday morning and planted her hands on his desk. “I thought about it all day yesterday. I tried to put myself in their place. Vander, I’m not sure I’d want to know the truth.”

Pushing back in his chair, he crossed his arms. “Why not?”

“I was thinking about my family, and I hate thinking about them,” she said with a drawn-out sigh. “What if my father had other children, ones he’d never had a relationship with, would I want them to know what he did to me? I know the kind of hurt it caused me. I…sometimes it’s not better to know you’re related to someone who’s done something terrible. It’s not like anyone is at risk here.”

He’d thought about the situation from a million different angles. Ultimately, he’d be breaking a whole host of agreements other people had made decades ago—not to mention causing plenty of pain to Shelby and her siblings, who’d already been hurt so much.
 

Plus, if he told them, Louisa might never forgive him. How was he supposed to show up at family occasions knowing she blamed him for sharing the ugly details surrounding the demise of her marriage?

But how could he keep such a big secret from the woman he loved, especially after he’d spoken to her about the importance of honesty?

“Thank you for sharing your opinion,” he told Charlie, reaching for his cup of coffee.

“You haven’t decided yet,” she said, frowning.

“No,” he replied, reaching for his phone when it beeped, signaling a text. Shelby.

Hey, gorgeous. I missed you last night. How about I come over early with my new key and make you dinner?

He stared at the display and turned the phone over. Great. Now he was avoiding her. This couldn’t continue. She’d get hurt and mad. Rightfully so. He didn’t want to treat her badly when she’d done nothing but love him.

He didn’t want to lose her.

“All right, leave me be,” Vander said to Charlie, looking up at the ceiling. “I need to think.”

“Holler if you want to throw darts,” she said. “You could crack like a stone you’re so tense.”

When she left, he dug out a legal pad and wrote down the pros and cons of the problem, like he would do to work out a case. That didn’t help. Charlie’s take had been enlightening. It shook him that his friend, who had always believed in people facing harsh truths, wouldn’t want to know if she were in Shelby’s place. Still, he felt the need for more advice.

He settled into his morning, meeting with clients and working the leads on his current cases. But nothing could completely distract him from his problem. He thought about talking to Gail about the situation since she knew Shelby, but the woman was too unpredictable. She might up and tell Shelby herself.

Who could he trust? Rye came to mind, but he dismissed the idea as quickly as it came. Rye could be about as unpredictable as Gail in his own way. Plus he had a baby coming any day.
 

But Clayton… Rye trusted his secrets with his manager, and Vander knew him to be a man of honor. Desperate to talk it out with someone, he picked up the phone and called him.
 

“Vander!” Clayton said. “We missed you yesterday at family dinner. Not that I don’t understand your absence. Hopefully, Louisa will calm down some. Amelia Ann filled me in on the whole situation. Hope you know I wouldn’t say anything.”

That made everything easier.

“Of course,” he immediately responded. “That’s why I’m calling, actually. I need some advice. There’s been a break in the case. You need to know up front that it’s pretty awful stuff, and I don’t want you to tell Amelia Ann if we decide to keep this between us. I don’t want to put you in a bad situation, but…I don’t know what to do here. You know the family better than I do.”

“I’m glad you felt you could trust me,” Clayton said, concern lacing his voice. “You have my word it’ll stay between us. Amelia Ann sometimes can’t tell me things about her work at the legal clinic. It won’t hurt us any.”

Vander felt relief at that. He didn’t want to cause strain in anyone else’s relationship. “Let me lay it out for you.”

When he finished, Clayton was silent for some time. Then he said, “It’s worse than I expected. I mean…Jesus. A minor? And she had a baby? That means they have a half sister or brother out there.”

“I know.” Vander had thought about the girl and the child too. He’d wondered if he should try and find out what happened after Skylar Watkins went to Texas, but without anyone’s permission, that seemed like overstepping.

“I can see your dilemma. You’re pretty much fucked all ways, aren’t you? Pardon my French.”

“No pardon needed,” Vander said. “When I’m not sick to my stomach, I want to curse a blue streak. I don’t want this to hurt Shelby or any of them, but—”

“You tell J.P.,” Clayton interrupted. “He’s been the head of that family since their daddy left, and the women all respect him. He’s also capable of keeping a secret if needed. I’d talk to him if I were in your place.”

Vander had wondered about talking to J.P., but it had a lot of cons. “Shelby would get mighty upset if she finds out I talked to J.P. before her.”

“In this situation, I don’t see a way around it,” Clayton said. “Especially since Louisa has always been so dead set against the truth coming out. Now it all makes sense. That poor woman. I’ve known her a long time. This would have destroyed another woman, but she… Well, she’s one tough cookie.”

He concurred. “All right, I’ll talk to J.P. Thanks, Clayton.”

“You’re welcome,” the man said. “I think I’ll say a prayer for everybody, and trust me when I tell you how rare that is.”

“I know what you mean,” Vander said. “Thanks again, Clayton.”

He hung up and stared at his phone for a solid minute before pulling up J.P.’s contact information and calling him.

“Hey, it’s Vander,” he said when the other man picked up. “Hope you don’t mind me calling.”

“Not at all,” J.P. said. “I was sorry you didn’t join Shelby yesterday. All of us want you to feel welcomed. Mama will come around, I promise. She’s a good woman and always tries to do what’s right.”

Vander had new insight on that. “Clayton told me I could talk to you about something. How does your day look?”

There was an audible pause. “I can make time. I’m writing a song today, so I’m pretty flexible.”

“Could you meet me…” And a public place just wouldn’t do it, given the subject matter, especially since he couldn’t risk running into Shelby. Charlie would let him use her place. “I’ll text you the address. How about in an hour?” It was heading on about noon now.

“Sure thing,” J.P. replied. “See you soon.”

Vander picked up a pen and rolled it over his fingers. “You didn’t even ask me what it was about.”

“I figure you’ll tell me soon enough,” the man responded. “See you in a bit.”

That answer cemented it. J.P. was the right person for him to talk to. Thank God, he’d called Clayton. After a quick chat with Charlie, Vander drove to her apartment, equipped with her key and alarm code. Like him, she didn’t want the maintenance of a home or yard. She’d warned him everything was mostly clean, but that he’d have to pick up a little.
 

When he got back to the office, he was going to tease her about throwing her dirty laundry around the house. She was so clean in her work space. It rather surprised him to see the disarray, but honestly, he was happy for the distraction while he waited.

J.P. arrived soon after he finished tidying up, and it took the other man all of two seconds to ask, “This isn’t your place, is it?”

Vander shook his head. “What gave it away?”

“The purse over the chair. It’s not Shelby’s style.”

Looking over, he caught the plain black bag J.P. was referring to. “No, it’s not. This is Charlie’s place. I’m sorry about the caution. It was…necessary.”

J.P. put his hands on his hips, his eyes narrowing. “That doesn’t sound good. What’s going on?”

Vander’s chest constricted as he thought about what he needed to say. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“No, let’s just get to it. I’m trying not to be worried here. Is it Shelby?”

Again, Vander shook his head. “No, it’s about your father. There was a break in the case…and now I know why he left. It’s…” God, how could he describe it? “I understand why your mother didn’t want you to know. In fact, that’s why I’m not sure I should disregard her wishes. Your dad left it up to me to decide. But all of you wanted to know the truth, and I don’t like keeping anything from Shelby.”

J.P. looked down like he was studying the floor. “That bad, huh? I feared it had to be for Mama to be so tight-lipped. You don’t know her well yet, and she certainly hasn’t shown you her best side, but she’s always saying you can’t heal what you won’t talk about. And Mama believes in healing. It’s what she does as a preacher.”